Baekhyun ran.

He ran, ran, and ran as far as he could, as fast as he could. The tears streaming down his face and the way his legs and feet began to ache were of no concern to the upset man. Nothing mattered in that moment and the only thing he could even think about was something that hurt his heart.

Chanyeol has a kid.

Chanyeol has a family.

The hurtful fact that he hadn’t wanted to believe all those times was sinking in because he had seen the damn proof playing together right in front of him just moments (or hours) ago. Baekhyun had never felt so low—so heartbroken—before. This was a thousand times worse than their first break up, overhearing that phone call, Chanyeol not walking with him—Chanyeol belonged to someone else. Chanyeol was a goddamn father.

Winded, aching and crying, Baekhyun collapsed to his knees and poured all his pain into wrenching sobs. He didn’t know where he was, he couldn’t think clearly enough to even look around. Instead he just sat pitifully on the sidewalk or road or alley, he wasn’t sure.

This was probably one of the worst mornings of his life.

It stung, that was for sure. Knowing now for sure that Chanyeol would never be his again. Baekhyun wanted to rip out his heart just so he wouldn’t be able to feel such pain anymore.

He just wanted Chanyeol.

Baekhyun felt sick he realized, just seconds before he leaned over to the side to throw up the contents of his stomach onto the sidewalk. Great, now he was brokenhearted and losing his insides.

“H-Hey, are you okay?” Baekhyun heard someone ask him, gently touching his shoulder.

He hadn’t noticed just how weak he felt until just then. Still crying and blubbering, Baekhyun couldn’t even utter out a response.

“Woah, watch yourself,” the voice cautioned, placing their hands on Baekhyun’s shoulders to steady the upset man, “Do you need help?”

Baekhyun felt it difficult to breathe.

“…Do you need to go to the hospital? Can you answer?”

, he was having a panic attack, Baekhyun realized, his crying fit hysterically starting over as he gasped for oxygen. This was not a good feeling at all, the dizziness was making him nauseous again and his chest felt extremely tight is was painful.

“C-Chanyeol,” was all Baekhyun could gasp out as he weakly clutched his fist onto the person’s shirt in desperation.

“Shh, it’s okay….”

Baekhyun wanted to die.

He was going to die.

“….-kay, I’m here.”

Annoying beeping sounds and the overpowering aroma of sanitizing chemicals was what woke Baekhyun up, feeling delirious and sick. He didn’t dare open his eyes with his head pounding the way it was and he still felt slightly nauseous from…

Well, what happened even?

It was then he realized he was in a bed—not a comfortable one, that’s for sure, and something warm was holding his hand while the rest of his body chilled. That was odd.

A few moments passed before the nausea subsided and Baekhyun finally felt fine enough to open his eyes, and was taken by surprise by his surroundings.

It was clearly a hospital room, the reflection of the fluorescent lights reflecting off the white walls into his face. Just wonderful. What was he even doing here? He vaguely recalled feeling like dying, like the world was falling down all around me.

“Oh, you’re awake?”

What?

The world was conspiring against him. What had Baekhyun done to deserve such torture?

“Chanyeol, what are you doing here?” Baekhyun rasped out, his throat dry. Chanyeol quickly brought him a cup of water, which Baekhyun drank thankfully.

However, still confused, Baekhyun was impressed with himself by not having another breakdown right them with Chanyeol in the same room with him. Especially taking care of him.

“I found you on the street,” Chanyeol answered, total concern etched on his face, “You were hyperventilating and I wasn’t sure what to do, so I just called an ambulance…”

Oh.

How embarrassing.

“Want to tell me what happened? Did someone hurt you?” Chanyeol questioned him, shaking his leg; another nervous habit of his.

Yeah, Baekhyun thought to himself bitterly. It was you who hurt me.

Baekhyun only shook his head, turning to look away from the taller man and trying with all his might to make sure his eyes weren’t going to start watering. He wasn’t going to cry to Chanyeol; it was past that.

That odd warmness was still on Baekhyun’s hand, and he looked down only to be stunned to see Chanyeol’s hand holding his own. Was Chanyeol that worried? To hold his hand…

Baekhyun pulled his hand away and clasped his hands together, resting them in his lap.

He didn’t catch the deepening frown on Chanyeol’s face.

Sighing, Chanyeol stood up before walking out of the room, Baekhyun scoffing to himself after he did so.

Of course, Baekhyun was awake now. Chanyeol wasn’t obligated to stay with him any longer. It made sense for him to leave.

Baekhyun felt bitter.

Except, Chanyeol did eventually come back with a doctor in tow.

“Byun Baekhyun? I’m Dr. Choi, it’s nice to meet you,” the man in the white coat said, the crinkling eyes and friendly smile warming up the room. “How are you feeling?”

“Better than how I was earlier,” Baekhyun replied, weakling sending a smile back to the doctor. The drowsiness he felt kept him from using most of his facial muscles; he probably looked awful. He wasn’t even wearing eyeliner for crying out loud.

“Speaking about earlier, it was clear that you were hyperventilating, which can be caused by a tremendous amount of stress, or something traumatic occurrence. I want you to know that you’re in a safe environment here, and it’s okay to talk about how you’re feeling and whatnot. Were you victimized in any way at all, or…Well, do you mind sharing what happened?” Dr. Choi asked kindly.

Baekhyun didn’t say a word nor make any indication of hearing the doctor. He felt so uncomfortable now with Chanyeol in the room.

“If you want, I can also call our on-duty counselor. She’s a very kind lady and very easy to talk to,” Dr. Choi pressed further, sensing the discomfort. It was part of his job, after all.

Baekhyun shook his, but gave his thanks anyway. “I…I was just stressed, everything came on at once. Sleeping did help a lot,” was what he said, hoping the doctor would drop the subject.

And Dr. Choi complied, nodding before motioning to Chanyeol with his free hand, “Chanyeol here called the ambulance for you, and stayed to make sure you were alright. He’s a very nice young man.”

Chanyeol smiled sheepishly, shaking his head. “We know each other, Dr. Park,” he explained, “We grew up together.”

It was impossible to not notice the casualness of their speaking.

“Wow, small world then, it would seem,” Dr. Choi laughed, turning to Baekhyun, “Chanyeol is always one to offer such kindness. We’ve known each other for a couple years now, what with his situation and all, I’m sure you know.”

Situation?

No, Baekhyun was not aware of that at all, but he tried his best not to show it.

“Actually, Dr. Choi, Baekhyun and I lost contact for a while and only recently began speaking again,” Chanyeol cut in, his voice wavering as if trying to cover up.

Yeah, surely he had a lot he was hiding.

With a bit more exchanging of words and Baekhyun’s insistence that he was fine now, Dr. Choi ordered that he get plenty of rest and strongly suggested an appointment with a counselor at some point.

“I don’t need a shrink,” Baekhyun grumbled as he and Chanyeol stepped out of the hospital together, the distaste he felt towards the statement ever evident.

Chanyeol chuckled and rolled his eyes, “I’m sure you don’t, and Dr. Choi only suggested it.”

Baekhyun huffed, “So you know him pretty well, huh. What’s that about?”

Nosy? Yes, Baekhyun was. At this point, he didn’t care. He just simply didn’t care anymore.

Chanyeol looked uncomfortable, and Baekhyun almost laughed aloud at that.

“Just personal things. You wouldn’t understand.”

Wouldn’t understand?

That just ticked Baekhyun off even more. He could practically feel his anger oozing out of his skin like sweat. Who was Chanyeol to say that he wouldn’t understand? Baekhyun wanted to yell—no, to scream at the other, feeling fed up with everything.

“I think I would understand just fine…,” Baekhyun mumbled, mostly to himself, but Chanyeol heard him clearly before huffed exasperatedly himself.

“It’s my business.”

Baekhyun crossed his arms as he walked on.

“In that case, I’ll take me leave,” he shot out hastily.

“Baekhyun, stop,” Chanyeol demanded, authority clear in his tone, making Baekhyun pause.

Yeah, he wasn’t exactly used to Chanyeol being the boss. What was that about?

“You’ve been avoiding me, that much is clear. Maybe you’ve finally gotten it through your head that you shouldn’t be around me because I’m an —yes, I admit.

“But Jongdae is being a whiny saying that I obviously must have done something wrong to upset you, for you to be avoiding the café. So if you could make sure to stop by sometime, Jongdae would appreciate it.

“Also, I’m sorry if I did something to offend you.”

Baekhyun was stunned, to say the least. He hadn’t expected such an outburst like that. He really didn’t know what to say to that.

The way Chanyeol shifted his eyes around to anywhere was cute and made Baekhyun want to just hug him.

Baekhyun really hated how bipolar and indecisive he had been feeling lately, especially today. First, he’s hurt and hates his ex-lover, and now he just can’t find it within him to be irate anymore. Why can’t his heart and mind be on the same page for once? Why can’t things ever go smoothly?

It really , and Baekhyun hated it. And to some extent, he just absolutely loathed himself because he felt responsible for everything.

“I am mad,” Baekhyun confessed quietly, fully aware of Chanyeol’s large eyes trained on him as he spoke. “I’m mad at you and hurt, and I have been for a while, but today was just worse.”

When Chanyeol remained silent, Baekhyun took that as he cue to continue.

Damn, he really couldn’t believe he was doing this. What the hell was wrong with him? Someone stop him.

“I love you, and I always have been. I just can’t stop and I hate it because it hurts so damn much. I know you’ll probably never want to see me again after this, I understand, but I just wanted to get it out there,” Baekhyun’s voice trembled as he confessed, a ghost of a tear trailing down his cheek before he angrily wiped it away. He hoped Chanyeol didn’t notice it.

“Baekhyun…I can’t…,” he heard Chanyeol begin to say, but Baekhyun didn’t let him finish.

“I know it won’t work. You have someone else now, you’ve moved on. You have priorities now.”

Baekhyun sniffled before straightening himself.

“We’re going to go on like none of this happened today, okay? I’ll drop by your work some time to see Jongdae, but…today never happened. I’m going to go home now and you’re going to go about your day,” Baekhyun finalized, knowing Chanyeol wouldn’t try to stop him.

It was better that way.

So he had confessed that day and it was one of the most painful things he had done.

Including one of the most stupid things as well.

Chanyeol had a family; who was Baekhyun to admit his feelings to get in the way. That’s why today never happened though.

Before walking away, Baekhyun turned to give Chanyeol a final look, no sign of anger or hurt in sight. Instead, he smiled; a smile Chanyeol hadn’t seen in a long long time.

“Your daughter is very beautiful, by the way. Bye, Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol was thrown back into a stunned stupor at the words, remaining in his spot on the sidewalk and Baekhyun walked away and out of sight.

A/N: ....I'm late again. But how was it?! Please let me know~~~~~~