(A/N: Wanted to try something different for this chapter. I decided to makes this one first person.)

Alice’s P.O.V.

  I slammed the door, locked it, and sunk to the floor. My body shook and my breathing came in short, ragged breaths. I wrapped my arms around my knees and worked to calm my breathing. My body. But how could I, after that? I was kissed by… My first kiss had been with… I gasped for air, still in shock. I mean, I just did blow up in front of everyone!

  And Jonghyun… oh crap! I just totally realized I’ve had two almost first kisses. The first with Yamaa, back in Kyoto and the second with Jonghyun. But if I love Yamaa, then why did I so easily accept to lean in and almost kiss Jonghyun? Why did I feel so shy around him? Why did my heart beat faster when he was close? Why do I have such an attraction to him?

  It wasn’t right! There was no way I could love two people at the same time. Because for the longest time, I’ve always loved Yamaa… and he’d kissed.

  Me.

  But he has a girlfriend. A girlfriend and goes kissing me. But I love him, so I should be happy, right?

  “Alice,” I froze at the sound of his voice. “Alice, I…” his phone went off and I knew it was either Shouji or Tauru calling him to tell him they were downstairs, waiting. I heard him sigh, reluctant to go. Finally his receding footsteps could be heard and I relaxed in relief. And began to cry.

  I cried because I was confused.

  I cried because I felt guilty.

  I cried because I loved Yamaa.

  I cried because I wasn’t allowed to love him.

  I cried because of my attraction to Jonghyun.

  All in a span of five minutes I realized I needed to get my act together. This wasn’t like me at all.

  I lifted my head as I heard murmurs on the other side of the door. Guilt gnawed at my stomach as I realized they must be talking about what had happened and eventually moved away. Most likely headed to the living room. I sighed and got up, turned to face the door and unlocked it. I took a deep breath and opened the door to find a frozen Jonghyun with his arm raised. It seemed he had been about to knock.

  I froze too as soon as we locked eyes.

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Yamaa’s P.O.V.

  I had acted like a fool. A complete idiot. What right did I have to go and kiss her like that? None. None at all. Fake girlfriend or not, it had been the wrong thing to do. Thoughtless and irresponsible. I had no right to stop her from kissing him. But I had too. How stupid.

  I hated her being angry at me. She had every right to be. Had it really been worth it? Yes. I would make it up to her, one way or another. She would forgive him right? Somehow, but I knew I would never regret kissing her. I loved how her lips had felt against my own… even if she’d only kissed me back for a second before pushing me off. It had ended too soon.

  “Yamaa!” my head snapped up. “Daijoubu desu ka?”

  “Hai, hai,” I smiled at the director. “Nande monai. Gomennsai.”

  “Hai!” he looked away and I sighed.

  I couldn’t dwell on it now, I had work to do.

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Alice’s P.O.V.

  “Alice-ah,” Jonghyun lowered his hand and looked away. “Are you…”

  I knew what he meant and gave him a small smile. “I’m fine.”

  “Can I come in?” he looked at me and I shivered. I got out of the way and closed the door again once he was in the room. “Alice, I—I feel a little responsible for what happened.”

  “Why?” I leaned on the door, a puzzled look on my face.

  “If I’d locked—No, if I hadn’t dragged you to the bathroom,” he took a step forward. “Your first kiss…”

  “I’m not going to count as a first kiss,” I finally whispered.

  “Yo—you’re not?” he gave me a confused glance.

  “I didn’t kiss him back,” I held on tightly to my resolve. “And it wasn’t even long enough to consider as a kiss.”

  He looked like he was about to point something out, but thought better of it, a small smile playing on his lips. “I see.” He his lips unconsciously, but I noticed. I looked at his lips attentively. His beautiful lips. I had been so close to tasting them earlier. I mentally slapped myself for my odd thoughts. “So, you’re 19 and still haven’t had your first kiss?”

  I bit my lip and chocked out a “no”, causing him to smirk.

  “That’s hard to believe,” he stepped forward again, but looked away shyly just as fast.

  “Oh really?” I couldn’t help but play along, yet feel just as shy. “Why is that?”

  “Because you are quite beautiful,” he tucked a strand of free hair behind my ear. I raised an eyebrow. “And because you have quite the character that’s very lovable.”

  “Hmm,” I closed my eyes when he caressed my cheek with the back of his hand. “Quite the charmer, aren’t you?”

  “I try,” I felt him lean in. “May I?”

  My eyes fluttered open and looked into his beautiful eyes, his lips only centimeters away. I breathed in his scent, sweet yet y and manly. I closed my eyes again in response to him. He leaned in, his lips brushing mine gently and sweetly. So this was a kiss. I thought to myself. I relished in the moment, returning his kiss. My hands rested on his bare sides and he cupped my face with his hands gently. He and I pulled apart, foreheads and noses touching. I slowly opened my eyes as did his. I smiled and he returned it.

  “Now that’s a first kiss,” I mumbled, my cheeks suddenly turning red.

  He laughed. “Yeah.” He laid his head on my shoulder. “We should go with the others. Adriel and Belle are worried. Specially Adriel.”

  “Mm,” was all I managed to say, putting my arms around him. I really had no idea what I was doing.

  Adriel was fuming when we finally emerged, hand in hand. He’d just taken my hand and I’d let him. Adriel paced back and forth, going on about something as Belle tried to calm her down. Minho, Key, and Taemin were sitting down, following Adriel’s movements with great interest. Well, that and concern. They seemed a little confused and exasperated by her mood and because they weren’t sure what do to help calm her.

  “Adriel,” Belle complained.

  “Hyung!” Taemin was the first to notice us. “Noona!”

  Adriel’s head snapped up as she stopped her pacing. “Alice, you better explain just—” she stopped, noticing for the first time how Jonghyun and I held hands. “Wha—” she sunk to the floor, suddenly seemingly exhausted. I sighed.

  I was in for it now. Better prepare myself.

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Okay, well... that was interesting, even for me. I seriously don't know what I'm going to do now because of this.

Tell me what you think. You must think Alice is prettys stupid, right?

Well, just FYI, I might not update in a while since I really have to work on my other two fics, and another idea for another fic just popped up in my head.

How stupid of me, right? It has to do with MBLAQ and I just can't seem to let it go. But don't worry, I won't drop this one.

I'll just be extremely busy with ther other two for a while. Who knows, I may update sooner than I think.

Oh, and it might look like I update a couple of times, but it'll prob be cuz I'm proof reading for any grammar in other chapters.

Please suport my other fics! And I have 19 subs again! Yay! I hope I can make it to 30 someday!

I'm going to put up a poll because I'd like to know if you'd like me to continue in first person or not, okay?

Thanks for your comments! I love them! So remember, read, comment, subscribe!

I can't figure out how to put up the poll... T.T