Daesung's head hurt, he had cried so much that he had a splitting headache. How long had it been, an hour? Two? He didn't remember a time when he had cried so much. He felt all dried up and weak. Still, after all that crying, the void inside of him remained. Somehow he had expected it to be washed out with the bucket of tears he had just cried. But if anything, it was aching even more, the life force right out of him. Why did it have to hurt so much? His mom his hair gently, periodically drying his tears. She hadn't said a word, she just let him cry it out, holding him, letting him know she was there. He was so thankful for his mom, he didn't know what he would do without her.

Did Seunghyun have a shoulder to cry on? Daesung wasn't sure. His stomach churned, the thought of Seunghyun having to go through this all by himself split his heart in two. He got the urge to run over to him, to comfort him and put an end to his sufferings. Was love enough? Their outlook on life was so fundamentally different, did it still make sense to be together? If Daesung would let this incident slide, forgiving and forgetting, would it be long until there would be another clash between them? The longer they were together, the deeper their feelings would get. If it hurt so incredibly now, Daesung shuddered to think how it would be down the line. No, it was better just to end it now, while they could still get over it and continue their lives, hopefully being able to find happiness again.

Daesung had stopped crying, lying silently in his mother's arms. He could feel she was wrestling with herself whether she should say something or not. He wished she wouldn't, it pained him that he couldn't tell her everything, but he was not about to lose Seunghyun and his mother in one go. He couldn't risk it. “Whatever it is, you two will be able to work it out, hmm.” his mom his cheek gently. It pained her to see him this way. Daesung shook his head, starting to cry again. Was there no limit to the amount of tears his body could produce? Daesung felt slightly embarrassed being such a crybaby, but the pain inside of him was too big, too intense for him to handle.

His mother sighed, “But you were so happy to have him as a friend, you've completely transformed since you met him. You're enjoying life more, loosening up a bit, not just working hard to make your mom proud. Which of course I am, I'm so proud of you honey. But you need to have a life as well. Life isn't the destination, it's the journey. We should cherish every day like it was our last and what gives life meaning is the people that are in it. You, my little bundle of sunshine, are what keeps my world turning, you make it all worth it. I think anyone would be lucky to have you in their life, and I think no matter what Seunghyun did, he must be regretting it something awful right now. Surely your friendship is stronger than this, are you going to let a small bump in the road derail you completely? If you'd only sit down and talk it out..”. Daesung looked at his mom with a hint of desperation, “I don't know if I can. He completely ignored my wishes and acted out of utter selfishness, like, to the point that he was prepared to use other people for his own gain, hurting them wittingly. I just.. I can't get passed it.”. Daesung was devastated, the more he thought about it the more convinced he got that there was no way out. And he so desperately wanted a way out.

“Have you stopped to think that maybe he didn't see it that way? He's quite wealthy right?” his mom asked, already assuming the answer was yes. Daesung nodded. “Maybe he was brought up in a world where people just do what they want, not thinking about the effects their actions could have on other people. Rich people often get accustomed to using money to get what they want, which usually works. Not many people say no to big sums of money, so there aren't many that stand in their way and if they encounter a problem, they again simply solve it by throwing more money on it. Perhaps he just needs you to show him the error in his thinking, to show him that stepping on other people is wrong no matter what he stands to gain. Knowing Seunghyun, I'm guessing there was an important reason why he did whatever it was he did?” it sounded almost as if she was thinking aloud. “Mmm... kind of.” Daesung wasn't as convinced as Seunghyun that they needed a cover, but he had been really worried that Daesung could get hurt because of their relationship. Daesung recognized that it wasn't a trivial reason, but it was no excuse though.

“It's worth the try, right? To sit down with him and explain your point of view. No point keeping him in the doghouse, if he doesn't even know why he's there.” his mom insisted. “Maybe.” Daesung wasn't sure it was a such a good idea. “To love is not just blindly accepting all the good things, it's knowing that person's flaws, learning to love how they came to be and helping your loved one overcome them, growing together to become better human beings. This goes both for friends as well as girlfriends. You can't expect the sky always to be clear. The clouds teach you to appreciate the sun. I know you tend to see things in black and white, but later you will come to realize that the world is mostly gray, and when you do, you will kick yourself for giving up on your friendship without a fight.” his mom always knew the right things to say. She was such an amazing person. How she ended up with that lowlife he refused to call his father was beyond him.

“Oh, by the way, how is it going with your girlfriend? Are you still together? You never tell me anything. Don't tell me that's what the fight with Seunghyun is about?” his mom asked curiously. She showed too much interest in his life. Wouldn't it be suspicious if he said he'd broken up with her at the same time he was fighting with Seunghyun? He was lying way too much these days. His life was in dire need of simplification, removing Seunghyun from the equation solved all his problems. Why, oh why did it have to be so hard? “Ehm oh, yeah her.. yeah she's fine, we're ok.” Daesung stuttered way too much, he hoped his mom wouldn't pick up on it.

Daesung picked up extra shifts and buried himself in work over the weekend, being too busy and tired to wallow in his sorrows. The following week he did give what his mom said a lot of thought, and sometimes he could almost agree with her. Seunghyun was no doubt brought up in riches, not being taught the value of anything but money. He knew Seunghyun was a good person, but rich people that disregarded the less fortunate was what Daesung hated the most. Although, Seunghyun wasn't really like that, he had a good heart, it was just a bit misguided sometimes. He started thinking that maybe he should forgive him, or at least talk to him, but then he saw Bora's sad face and got angry all over again. Bora tried to hide it, but she was obviously heartbroken, watching him with those hurt puppy eyes.

Daesung's evasion tactics proved very effective, he was able to avoid Seunghyun almost completely. He missed him something fierce though. Even though it was what he wanted, he was almost disappointed that Seunghyun didn't put up a greater fight. Sure, he had tried calling the house a few more times and left a note on Daesung's desk, which Daesung threw away without reading, but there had been no grand gestures. No knight in shining armor whisking him away despite his objections. Maybe Daesung had overestimated Seunghyun's affection for him, multiplied it with hopeful thinking. Maybe Seunghyun had just been sad for a little while and then moved on, just like Daesung had told him to do. But did he really want him to? He had kind of taken for granted that Seunghyun would love him for always. A childish thought, no question, but it had been an unconscious one. What if he lost him for real? Daesung could feel the panic rising, making his skin crawl.