“Ready to go?” Jessica shouted over the music, cringing as her voice cracked. If she lost her voice tomorrow, she might die from embarrassment.

Tiffany nodded, grabbing her clutch and two disposable cups of water. She handed one to Jessica.

“Thanks,” Jessica mouthed before sipping.

Tiffany opened the door and led them out. “Whooh! Today was a packed night.”

Jessica laughed. “Looks like you’re sooo popular,” she teased as their heels clicked on the sidewalk.

Tiffany flipped her hair over her shoulder. “I can’t just help it,” she replied in a similar playful tone.

Jessica grinned widely and was about to reply when she froze in place.

“What?” Tiffany followed her gaze and saw a man getting out of the car. His face had a slightly lost look, like a dog with a long face. He glanced over at them. He nodded, his eyes glazed over that made it clear he hadn't really seen them, and opened the door into the bar section of the club.

When the door clanged shut, Tiffany turned. “Isn’t that the part of the club you said you saw the guy from your class?”

Jessica nodded stiffly, still looking at the door the guy went through.

“Can you even talk?”

She shook her head.

Tiffany sighed and took her arm, dragging her as they started walking again. She knew when Jessica froze like that, there was no way of coaxing words out of . “Okay, we might as well go home if you’re going to be mute,” she said as they headed for the subway station.

As they sat in the subway car, Jessica finally spoke. “I can’t believe I’m such a fool.”

“What?”

Jessica shook her head. “It’s been so long, but I still become a mess every time I see him.” She put her hand to her head. “It’s like every time I’m forced to relive everything. And even though now I have my life all planned out, the ghosts of the past come to haunt me and make the doubts that I’ve put to rest come alive again.”

Tiffany put her arm over her friend’s shoulders. “I know you want to be strong, but sometimes you have to let yourself be weak in order to know what strong is,” she said in a soft voice.

“I know.” Jessica wiped at her eyes. Suddenly she burst out laughing. “Look at us! It was only a few hours ago when you came crying to my doorstep, and now you’re the one who’s got my back.”

Tiffany laughed with her.

This is why we’re friends.

*

“Hyung!” Donghae grabbed Yunho’s arm and forced him to put the drink down. “One more drink and you’ll pass out!”

Yunho gave a drunken laugh. “You’re right, dongseng.” He let go of the cup and leaned on the counter. “Wow, this night…aish…”

Donghae shook his head. “I don’t understand how you got to be so drunk. What happened? You’ve been through days that were equally as worse as today, but you never broke down this way.”

Yunho blinked, as if thoughts were slowly processing in his mind. “This girl…walked in…” he said in a haze. “Totally brushed me off. Dongseng, am I that undesirable now?”

“Of course not! Do you remember when you voted the most handsome in the first beauty contest at school? And you never lost after that,” Donghae said proudly.

Yunho laughed. “But that was middle school.” He looked up at the ceiling and sighed. “Now we’re in college…already working…did you expect to get old so fast?”

“Me?” Donghae harrumphed. “I never got old.”

Yunho shook his head. “My life…was never easy in the first place…”

Donghae nodded. “I know, hyung. I was there with you.”

“Can you believe it though? We were both too young to remember when you first stood at my side. Sometimes I think I should have stayed the way I was, numb, unfeeling...” Yunho sighed and raised his cup again.

“No!” Donghae reached over and slammed the cup down once more, his voice tinged with a streak of panic. “Come on, hyung, let’s take a walk,"
 he said in a calmer voice.

Yunho made a sound to express his annoyance, but stumbled to his feet anyway.

After paying the bartender, Donghae led him out of the bar. He cringed as he saw Yunho stumble. “Aish, hyung! Even I wasn’t this drunk when I broke up with my first girlfriend,” he complained.

Yunho’s head shot up. “You had a girlfriend?” he asked in a shocked voice.

Donghae mentally cursed himself for being so exasperated that he blurted out that fact. “Uh…” he stammered.

Yunho laughed, hanging his head again. “Silly me…I must be very drunk to have imagined you saying such a thing.”

Donghae laughed too, although with less mirth.

Why can I not forget her…