10.    AJ POV

 

I grabbed the newspaper and the first thing that appeared was: Junsu grabbing a woman’s hand. If I’m not mistaken, it was the same woman he had kissed at the bar. I wanted to scramble the newspaper, tear it apart and throw because I was furious. It said: “Kim Junsu was caught grabbing a woman’s hand. Sources say is the same girl he kissed at the bar a few days ago. He looks happy with the woman; and according to the photographer, who took these pictures; they have been recently dating. However, these pictures have been recently revealed. Many fans ask who is that woman and why has Junsu suddenly chosen to go out with a woman? Some blame Alejandra James, she may have harmed him and that’s why she disappeared and his suffering the consequences. However, it seems somewhat anecdotal, as it is the third scandal by Junsu. This won’t stop and it seems there are more since many people are entering James’s Building, Kim Jaejoong, another member of JYJ. It is thought he is seeing someone from the workers but no one knows exactly. Rumors spread but they cannot be secure unless they confirm it”

-       Damn it!- I yelled.

Yunho and Changmin weren’t here, so that’s why I could scream without worrying about them.

-       Ahhhhh!! Why are you doing this to me Kim Junsu?- I mumbled – Are you out of your mind? Don’t you care about your…?- I started screaming- have you already forgotten me? So soon? Why…? I haven’t…

I sat again and patted my huge tummy. I had 5 months, practically, and for me is so big. I couldn’t believe I was carrying the son of that damn dude who is dating a girl form a bar. Has he forgotten me?

-       Idiot! How can you do this to me? I’m carrying your baby, for god’s sake!- I screamed again.

Once again, I saw the pictures and felt fatal. He was holding her hand and in another, he was smiling also holding her hand. The more I looked at the pictures, more I cried. Why? I’m too sentimental.

I cooked while trying to sing.  All the songs that came up, I tried to sing even if I didn’t know the lyrics; I had to let go everything in some way.

I hope my son adapts to the noise and my horrible voice.

At night Yunho and Changming came, Changmin left straight to his room because his cellphone rang. Only Yunho stayed with me and we sat in the living room.

-       Are you all right? I read the news- he said being careful

I made a face irritated.

-       He’s a bastard. He’s running away from his reality. I’m here having his baby and he doesn’t even care- I grumbled.

-       See it in a good way, Ally. Please don’t get… nasty. It’s bad for the baby.

I grumbled mad.

-       Tell me the good way. Tell me, I want to hear it- I frowned and challenged him with my gaze.

He sighed and smiled patiently.

-       Maybe he’s trying to pull you out of the news. He’s using himself to distract the press. It’s better- he suggested.

For a moment I was touched but my hurt became harder. 

-       No. He is just dating that girl for pleasure.- I affirmed convinced.

-       How do you know? You can’t predict his intentions Ally. Please don’t get mad.

I crossed my arms and pouted.

-       Please – he begged.

I faked a smile and he laughed because of the expression I made. Finally we ended up laughing and playing. Of course we couldn’t be that rude but he ended up by my side laughing.

-       You look gorgeous, Ally – he whispered.

I swallowed. I know that…

-       Thanks

He wanted to get closer but got away and he stood up

-   Do you want to eat something? I’m hungry.

-   Oh yes Please!  - Changmin said while he came down jumping.

I raised an eyebrow. Did he drink? Or did his girlfriend called? That must be it…

God, poor my friend, Leslie.

Yunho rolled his eyes.

-   Changmin you are always hungry

-   Good then! – Changmin circled Yunho’s neck- C’mon let’s cook. I’m in a good mood.

-   What? The manager died? –  Yunho said from being excited and I laughed.  

How mean these singers are, how can they want their agent dead? What has he done? Is his job.

Changmin started laughing.

-   Uff! I wish that! No… I’m just in the mood of cooking besides I’m hungry.

-   Oh no… Changmin, we should hire someone to do that for us.

-   I don’t want to go to jail… no thanks – Changmin pushed Yunho into the kitchen – Just cook, your Ally is starving.

Me? I did not say anything. I guess, my face shows I’m drying from hungriness. Sometimes, I made faces to make Yunho laugh.

We ate and as never before, Changmin laughed with me or followed my jokes. He was so happy, that his emotion spread on us. In some point, it was awkward, but I guess he must really love his girlfriend a lot. 

 

-       Explain us Changmin – hablo Yunho riéndose - Is it the girlfriend? You are too happy; if the manager remains alive then it should be your girlfriend. What’s going on?

He stood up and laughed between gritted teeth.

-       No need to worry about me. I think I drank to much wine  - he laughed and left to the kitchen taking his plate.

When Yuhno finished he took me to my room and I asked him why he had asked Changmin that.

-   Well… - he explained – every time she comes to visit him, he’s bursting into happiness. He loves her too much, it seems, that even one call makes him crazy. It’s lovely because I can see that romantic side of him but anyway he keeps it in secret.

I made a face.

-   I hope I can meet her.

-   You won’t – he said and I got offended for a second.

-   Why?

He sighed.

-       He has been with her for almost a year… but I haven’t seen her not even once. She’s mysterious for me. I don’t know who she is and he won’t tell.

I raised an eyebrow and laughed malicious.

-   Then… let me work my magic.  – I giggled – Ok, Good Night.

-   Good Night  -he laughed too.  

 

 

***

LC POV

It was 5:30 when I woke up and saw Jaejoong putting on his T-shirt.

-       Wake up Leslie… it’s too late.

Then I remembered what I did and screamed.

No!

No! For god’s sake Leslie!!

I ducked my head and almost cried. How did I do this to him?

I should kill myself, throw myself from the office’s window. I don’t want to face him.

I sighed and almost cried.

Jaejoong gave me my clothes and a kiss in my cheek.

-       I’ve to go. – he muttered – I’m sorry… I’m really sorry.

I shook my head and bit my lip holding back my tears.

-   Please leave – was the only thing I could say.

-   I’m really sorry. Please don’t think it’s your fault – he begged me.

I killed him with my glaze.

-   It’s my fault! – I said – Bloody hell… what am I going to tell him? I can’t lie to him!

JaeJoong sighed.

-   I assume the responsibility, if he gets mad he has to get mad with me not with you.

-   I’m his girlfriend! Not you!

-   For god’s sake Leslie! I know! Just… - his jaw tensed.

I started crying in silence. I didn’t want him to end up being the guilt and I the victim. I can’t be such a coward to leave the responsibility to him. No!

-       Get dress, now. – he ordered me – I’ll be in Alejandra’s office.

I nodded. Besides, I needed his help on Junsu’s project. Alejandra wants to delay this project, but the fabric is already starting and Jaejoong had to go to there and stop it. Fortunately he could do it but still, there are reports to be pick up and a lot of papers about Junsu’s car.

I changed almost crying. Yes… I know, I’m a horrible girlfriend. At the very first moment Jaejoong crossed my way I felt in love with him. Don’t I have an intelligent mind telling me not to fall for Jaejoong?

I sighed. My brain collapsed when I saw him, apparently. The rest of the day I had my head down. Jaejoong tried to make me feel better but it didn’t work, I just noticed I’m a player.

And I don’t think my boyfriend would love me if I was unfaithful to him, he can be far, a bit, but I shouldn’t be taking that advantage.

In the end, we made the calls with Karen and she looked at us strange, because neither he nor me could look at each other, well he could but I couldn’t.

I tried to avoid his gaze all day, well I tried.

-       What’s going on? – he asked and crossed his arms.

I swallowed and dialed the next number.  

Karen took away the headphone form me and looked at me right in the eye, telling to answer her.

-   I’m tired – I said – he’s tired too

-   Oh right! JaeJoong you said you couldn’t call… why suddenly you are here? You changed your mind? – she raised her eyebrow.

I pulled my hand away and dialed a new number.  I also thought of the same question as Karen, but ignored it I didn’t want to think more. While I talked to this girl in the phone, I could hear Karen’s and Jaejoong’s conversation. 

-   Do you mind? – he replied between gritted teeth. He was in bad modd as me.

-   What happened? Really you look like you fought or worse. Something wrong?

-   It’s not your business, Karen.

-   I’m just curious because both… well look, awful.

Fortunately I had changed clothes. There is a small closet that belong to Alejandra is in her living room.

Jaejoong growled mad and stood up.

-   Fine, if you want me to leave, then I’ll leave. Good bye...

I finished talking to the girl and jumped a bit seeing him leave.

-       NO! – I screamed.

I ran to him and stopped him. We were on the office so I closed the door from the mini-room.

-   Please… don’t leave  - I begged him.

He made a face.

-       Why? I can’t be here anyway, I’ve work to do.

Then I noticed what I was doing. Why do I want him to stayÇ Oh god… I’m crazy.

-       Ok, just leave… - I sighed.

He hugged me and kissed me on my cheek.

-       I’m sorry, I’m truly sorry Leslie – he gave me a kiss over my hair– Bye.

As he left my heart jumped. I got scared because I have to face my reality alone. I didn’t know how to react to what is happening to me.

The fact that Alejandra left has worsen my situation in many ways especially in the romantic issue. 

I got home at 1 am, much earlier, which I’m happy about it. I finished washing and then I called my boyfriend.

-   Hello kid! – he sounded so excited that broke my heart.

-   Hi… - I muttered.

-   Ok… your voice sounds badly, what happened? Something with the company?

I denied with my head.

-   No… I’m tired just that. Anyway, tell me, you can speak now.

-   Oh ok. – he giggled – Erm… I just wanted you to come here. I need to talk to you here.

-   You want me to travel now? Wow… - I passed my hand through my bang, messing it.

-   Aha – he nodded.

I thought about it for more than a minute. Should I go? Face him? And if he found out? I don’t think so. .. he sounds too happy.  

-   Ok, I’m going. Where do I meet you?

-   You know where, as always.

-   I’ll be there tomorrow morning… - he smiled comforting me.

-   Ok, see you then 

I hang up and sighed. I should think about suicide….  Not possible, I love myself too much even though of the stupid things I do.

 

 

 

 

***

JS POV

-   Do you want to go out? I’m bored  - I asked her while I drove.

She laughed nervously and nodded.

-   Of course. Where?

-   I’ll pick you up then we decide, ok?

-   Sure.

Yunhee… is practically my partner. For real, I don’t know what I’m doing… it affects me leaving my life alone, or the fact that my son is wandering around the world drives me crazy. I get goosebumps thinking about never meeting him.

Yoochun gives me speeches about that woman- she is older than me- but I try to think in a good way. I think….

I arrived to her apartment. It was raining so I ran to there, I was going to enter to the lift when I saw her.

-   Hi Junsu – she smiled  - Oh! You are all wet!

I blew. 

-       Yes… I’m freezing. Anyway, let’s go

She took my hand and pulled me outside. You know what? I feel weird when she orders me instead of me doing it.

-   Where do you want to go? – I asked in the car.

-   Can we drink something? Most of the restaurants at this hour are full.

It was 11 pm. Indeed, some were full but, also the bars, only that for her it is more comfortable in bar than in a restaurant full of people. I can’t complain because it’s true, only that I has a fear for bars, the last time I went there I ended up making a scandal.

-   You know I don’t drink  - I dared to say.

She burst into laugh.

-   You met me in a bar, right? You can’t deny you drink.

Dammit, now she reproaches me.  

-   I know a place, let’s go there – I said.

-   Ok, as you wish.

When we arrived at that place, I sat at the same table as before. There was no one, even thought it was late.

-   Oh… nice place Junsu. How did you know about this? I’ve never been here before. – she was amazed.

I sighed.

-   A friend… showed me this place.

-   Aw, it’s really cozy. Thanks for sharing it with me – she gave me a smile.

I rushed to return a smile but I had to fake it. That place brings back some memories.  

I laughed between gritted teeth.

-   What?- she made a face.

-   Nothing. Ok, let’s eat, I’m hungry.

We are suppose to talk as a couple but I don’t feel like it, I feel like I’m replacing her. Why did it came to my mind to come here? Oh god.. what am I thinking?

I had the TV in front of me and sometime I took a glance, I was so focus that I couldn’t take my eyes away from the TV and Yunhee started noticing it. I ignored what she was saying and only focused in my world since we arrived.

-   Junsu, is something wrong? Do you want to leave?

-   Oh yes! Now! – I said standing up.

She looked at me strange and made a face.

-   What…? Erm… I haven’t finished.

-   It’s ok, I’ll pay for it. C’mon get up! – I ordered her.

She turned to see the screen and saw the daily news and got confused. I don’t know what bug bit me that I jumped a bit.

Then she was going to stand up when her leg got tangled with the leg of the table and she was about to trip over when the suddenly pictures of Alejandra James appeared on the TV. 

“It has been three months since the business woman Alejandra James has disappeared from Earth. Nobody know where she is and even though people have tried to look for her, they haven’t found her yet and now, many fear that the company may shut down because of the CEO leaving. And it has become worst, because of some true comments about a big possibility of shutting down the company. Some problems occurred last week and Leslie White, the actual CEO, might shut down the doors of this gorgeous company which belong to the second most riches woman in the world, Alejandra James. And..”

My mouth fell wide open, I got distracted and let Yunhee fall in front of me without looking at her. 

Then I realized when she knelled and hit my arm.

-       Hey! Why you didn’t do something? I fell down! – she frowned really mad.

I took a fast glance at the screen and Alejandra’s picture was still one.. she looked so beautiful.

-       JUNSU!  - she screamed.

I looked at her confused, then I leaned and apologized.

-   I’m sorry, I…I… I’m speechless – I muttered.

She growled with a angry face.

Suddenly, when I saw her expression I thought it was so funny and I burst into laugher. I couldn’t hold my laugh… and I don’t know if I was laughing at her for falling, how she looked or if it was because I was completely crazy and I had lost my mind. 

-       What’s so funny Junsu? Huh?

I leaned pressing my stomach which was running out of air.

-       I’m sorry… I just… I’m – I started laughing again.

She hit me won my head with her purse and left making noise with her high heels. 

-       Idiot!  - she mumbled as she left.

I sat down again, more calmed and looked at the TV. Alejandra had disappeared, just like the fire form the candle when you blow it off it disappears, she has done th same thing and has left everyone behind.

I looked around and for a second I saw her eating like that day, smiling because she was drunk. I was funny but I didn’t laugh, I didn’t want to make a fool of myself again.  

I sighed.

Now she must be 5 month pregnant, her tummy must be bigger. I would love to see her and be able to caress my future son.. Oh god, I can’t believe I’ll become a father.

I blew and ducked my head.

Should I look for her? Should I go after her and tell that even though I have met her for a weeks I have been enchanted? Or should I let her go and let her leave alone as she wants? Honestly, she must hate me and curse me for being a coward.

I drove to the office, James’s Building, and upstairs almost sneaking from the security and entered Alejandra’s office, which is now Leslie’s.

I marked the password and entered and saw Jaejoong sitting on the sofa with Leslie sitting in his legs, she had her head resting on his chest while she slept. He read a folder, which seem it belonged to the company.

My eyes widened.. apparently he has conquered her. I guess it was expected, I would have like for her to be a bit more complicated but it seems like she has fallen for him too fast.

-   So? Oh my… she has nice legs – I muttered

-   Hey! What are you looking at! – he laughed.

I laughed between gritted teeth.

For a moment, she looked like a model to me and the clothes didn’t help to take my eyes away from her.

-   Really, Junsu, stop looking at her! – he frowned.

-   OK… Sorry.

-   Why are you here, anyway? What happened? – he said.

He pulled Leslie closer to him and looked at her for a moment. In that instant I realized she didn’t have her shoes.

Oh god… jaejoong’s eyes were like an angel, for a moment I thought I was going to throw myself over him. No! I’m not that lunatic…

-   I just… I wanted… - I rambled.

-   You saw the news right?

I swallowed.

Yes, but I can in hope to see Alejandra setting in her desk reading something or smiling.

-   Sit on Alejandra’s chair… you will feel good.

-   I did once. It felt cozy and for a moment powerful – I laughed like an idiot.

Jaejoong sighed.

-   And your girlfriend? – he suddenly asked.

…

He caught me off guard.

-   Erm… well… she’s angry right now.

-   What have you done to her now? Junsu how many times have both fought? – he raised his eyebrow.

I made a face feeling uncomfortable.

-       I don’t know and now I don’t care.- I said coldly.

I looked at Alejandra’s chair and again I imagine her sitting there with her perfect outfits, going throught the pages of a magazine. My mind drew her as a perfect model…

“I made a signal with my finger telling Leslie to wait for a moment. In effect, she had to leave and apologized to the client. I was amazed that Alejandra was following my craziness.

-       What a kiss – I muttered when I let her go.

She blinked.

 

-   You, Kim Junsu, don’t have the right of kissing me – she mumbled

-   You followed me, so don’t complain Alejandra James – I smiled naughtily.

She hit my forehead.

-   It’s the last time you kiss me. Anyway why did you do it?

I made an innocent face and interlace my hands behind me.

I sighed.

Leslie moved a bit and opened her eyes slowly. Jaejoong looked at her again and smiled. It seems that Leslie attracts perfect men. 

-   Junsu? – she muttered.

-   Hi – I greeted her nervously.

She stood up and put on her shoes. My mouth fell open when I saw her from head to toe. She is really attractive.. oh god..

I escaped from her and entered the mini room. Many memories came back like flashes, one by one came along and it was stunning me. It was my consciousness, here as the last time I saw Alejandram when she told me she was pregnant. Unbelievable.  

I sat where I was that day and closed my eyes. I wish I could turn back time and instead of leaving like a coward, I would have returned to her.

I blew.

-       Junsu, I’m waiting  - I heard Alejandra’s voice.

I got scared and stood up really fast.  

God, now I imagine her? Oh no.. I’m like Hyun Bin from Secret Garden. I don’t want to become crazy!!

-       AH! – I screamed – What are you doing in my mind?

She smiled between gritted teeth and smiled.

-   Junsu… I’m waiting. I’ve been waiting for five months… do I have to wait for you more?

-   Get out! – I patted my head to make her – Get out!

-   Junsu-ya! I miss you! Please…  - she pouted.

The image scattered and I fell in the other sofa terrified. Lesli and Jaejoong entered the mini room and they became awkward when they saw my face, which looked like I had seen a ghost.

-   Junsu, what’s wrong? – Jaejoong asked.

-   Nothing… I’m… I’m tired  - I swallowed

-   OK, let’s go. We are leaving

I nooded in a hurry and left the room aghast.

That was too creepy. I never thought I could reach to this point of imagining her. She even talked!! GOD!  

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Sorry for keep you waiting ^-^ I hope you like it. Feel free to comment.