“So then, you’re trying to tell me that little Peach took his head,” Xiu Min points at Kris, “and smashed it against my boyfriend’s face because he wanted them to make out?” Lay nods; Xiu Min scoffs. “Yeah, and my smells like roses. Now what the really happened?”

“Ge, I told you what really happened,” Lay says, twiddling his fingers as he looks down.

“That might be a little more believable if you could actually look me in the eye when you said it,” Xiu Min says.

“Have you ever tried talking to you when you’re pissed?” Lay asks. “You’re like a freaking monster. You’re scary when you’re upset. One second, it’s like talking to Dr. Jekyll, but then you say just one wrong thing and you’re suddenly Mr. Hyde instead.”

“Fine,” Xiu Min says, taking a few deep breaths while looking straight ahead and focusing on a spot on the wall. “I’m calm. Just tell me the truth.”

Chen reaches over and puts his hand over Lay’s, letting him know that he’ll talk instead. “The truth is,” he starts, reaching with his other hand and grabbing onto the fist Xiu Min is making, “he really did do that, hyung. You should know that,” he says as he squeezes Xiu Min’s hand. “I told you after the motel fiasco that I would never do that again.”

Kris, the egotist that he can sometimes be, smirks to himself when he hears that. He can still clearly remember Chen saying that he’d kiss him back in a second if something like that ever happened again. Xiu Min’s quick to reach over and slap the smirk off of his face though. “You . This isn’t a time to be smiling like a damn idiot.”

Reaching over, Kris smacks him back. “Don’t make my face worse than it already is. I’m already scared about what our manager’s gonna say when he sees it as it is right now.” After he’s taken a few seconds to make sure the slap didn’t leave a mark, he turns back to Xiu Min. “You’re lucky that isn’t showing.”

“No, you’re lucky that my foot isn’t currently stuffed up your pompous ,” Xiu Min growls, wiggling his toes as he says it.

Sighing, Kris leans forward and rests his chin in his open hands, elbows on his knees. “Panda’s in there getting himself some beauty sleep and we’re out here being threatened because of something he did. Remind me to never give that boy alcohol again.”

“Where did Yi Xing go?” Lu Han asks when he comes out of the kitchen, the place he’s been hiding since he came home, the other members looking around when he says it.

“Yi Xing?” Kris calls out first. “Yi Xing!?” he calls out again, louder this time.

“I’m done mediating! Now I’m on the phone, so shut up out there!” he yells from his bedroom.

“He’s been talking to Joon Myun hyung almost all day today,” Chen says when he looks at the clock ticking away on the wall. “Both of the managers are gonna kill them when they see the bill for those things.”

“He’ll be fine.”

“What do you mean he’ll be fine?” Lu Han asks, turning to Kris. “I know better than anybody how much that is.”

“He’ll be fine because I help him pay for it,” Kris says, waving them off so he can rest. When Xiu Min complains about Kris not helping him the same way, the taller man just points to his cheek. “That would be because Yi Xing doesn’t slap me without a valid reason. Plus, the only person you call is Jong Dae. Nothing expensive there.” That’s when Lu Han asks the same question. “Because picking on you is fun. And because if I did that, you’d always be talking to Se Hun, and we’d never see your tiny again. Your phone is broken anyway, so why does this even matter?”

“You act like seeing less of Lu Han would be so terrible,” Chen says in Korean, rolling his eyes.

“Look at this asshat thinking I’ve forgotten how to speak Korean,” Lu Han says back in Korean as he kicks at Chen’s foot.

Tao hears that as he comes in from the bedroom, a smile instantly making its way onto his face. “Are we in Korea!? Did they come here instead? Is Joon Myun ge here!?”

“Dammit. Now look what you two did,” Kris complains as he gets up and walks over to Tao, turning him back towards their room. “It’s just a dream, Panda Bear. Let’s get you back in bed.”

“But gege~, I heard people speaking Korean,” Tao whines as he tries to turn back around in Kris’s arms.

“It was just dream Jong Dae. Come on. Bed,” Kris orders when he’s got Tao back in the bedroom.

“But duizhang,” Tao starts as he puts his hands up to his head, “my head hurts. I don’t feel good.”

------------

“’I don’t feel good’ he says,” Kris mocks as he sits on the edge of the tub, rubbing Tao’s back. He’s spent the past hour puking up every piece of cake and spoonful of ice cream he’d eaten throughout the day. “Better yet?” he asks when Tao flushes the toilet again and wipes the back of his hand over his mouth, only to put his face right back in the toilet bowl seconds later. “Guess not.”

“How much ice cream could you have possibly given him today?” Chen asks as he walks into the bathroom with a cup of water. “I swear he’s been puking up pink the whole time.” Hopping up onto the counter next to Tao, Chen pulls out a tiny packet of pills from the medicine cabinet. Ripping it open and letting the two pills fall to his hand, he holds them out to Tao when he flushes again, the glass of water in his other hand. “Here, Peach. Take these. They’ll help the headache.”

Kris takes them instead, Tao’s head back in the toilet yet again. “Thanks for helping,” he says with a small smile on his face.

“Min Seok still won’t talk to me so I figure I’ll sit here and wait for him,” he lazily points at Tao, “to get better so he can tell hyung himself. And Lu Han’s too busy trying to get Yi Xing’s phone since you told him about paying.”

Kris chuckles as he thinks about it. “That must be entertaining though. Lu Han wanting to talk to Se Hun while Yi Xing is wanting to talk to Joon Myun. That’s bound to go on until one of them drops, either dead or from exhaustion. Are you sure this is where you’d rather be?” he asks as he rubs small circles on Tao’s back, looking up at Chen as he talks.

Hopping off of the counter and getting onto his knees, Chen does the same thing, rubbing smaller circles between Tao’s shoulders. “I’m positive,” he says as he reaches around with his other hand to lightly rub Tao’s stomach. “I feel like half of this is my fault too.”

“Why? Did you get him drunk too?”

That makes Chen smile. “No. When I went to get the cake, I kind of… sprinkled a crushed sleeping pill on top,” he says with an embarrassed look on his face. “He was acting so crazy earlier and I just wanted him to calm down a little. I guess that really didn’t cause anything aside from an early bedtime, but I still feel a little guilty.”

Another flush stops the talking, Tao sitting back on his heels. Kris pats Chen’s hand. “Can you get a wet cloth?” he asks, Chen nodding and rushing off to get one. “Take these, Panda Bear,” he says as he holds the pills and glass of water out towards Tao, the younger quickly downing them both in one gulp. Kris’s hands are back to rubbing Tao’s back the second they’re empty.

“How are you feeling?” Chen asks as he comes back in with a damp rag, placing it against Tao’s forehead.

“Like someone pushed me from a moving car and then tried to run me over a few times,” Tao answers, throat sore and voice raspy. He scoots closer to Kris, resting his cheek on the taller man’s shoulder.

Wrapping his arms around Tao, Kris stands up, pulling the younger with him. “Come on, Panda. Let’s get you to bed,” he says as he leads Tao away from the bathroom, reaching over and patting Chen’s arm. “Can you bring a waste basket with an extra bag in here?” he asks him.

“Of course,” Chen answers, taking the glass from Tao’s hands. “I’ll be right there.”

As Kris is busy tucking Tao into bed a few minutes later, Chen comes in with a small trash can, two bags lining it, and hands it to Kris. “If you think you’re gonna get sick again, you just use this okay?” he tells Tao, putting the palm of his hand on the younger’s forehead. “For anything else, just call me okay?” he continues, putting Tao’s phone on the pillow beside him. Gently patting Tao’s stomach a few times, he gets up, ushering Chen out in front of him. “Remember,” he starts, turning around, “call me if you need anything. If I see you trying to get anything yourself while you’re sick, I won’t be happy about it.” Tao nods, closing his eyes and pulling the blanket up to his chin. Closing the door behind him and making his way to the living room, he plops himself down onto the couch with a heavy sigh. “I’m not cut out for this leader .”

As if trying to prove a point, he can hear a loud thump, followed by a scream from both Lay and Lu Han come from Lay’s room. “Do you want me to deal with it?” Chen asks.

Kris laughs. “No. I’m fine,” he says as he gets up, making his way to Lay’s room. Without thinking, he opens it slightly and then kicks it the rest of the way, wanting to make his presence known. Unfortunately, he wasn’t counting on both of them being so close to it. He still finds himself laughing though when Lu Han jumps up, rubbing his hands over his backside as he swears at Kris. “No need for such language, ge. It was only your .”

“It’s not like I have much there to cushion the blow!” the older yells out, still rubbing. “Yi Xing!” Lu Han yells when Lay takes the opportunity to grab his phone and run off. “Dammit, Yi Fan. You let him get away with the phone.”

“It’s his phone though, ge,” Kris says with a smirk on his face. That smirk slowly turns into a smile when he realizes how quickly that problem was solved. “Back to the living room,” he singsongs as he skips back to the couch.

“That was fast,” Chen says, clapping when Kris sits back down next to him.

Kris smiles. “Lucky accident.” They both giggle when Lu Han passes them on his way to the kitchen, hands still attached to his .

“Keep laughing,” he says. “I’ll have Se Hun beat you up next time he’s here,” he threatens.

“Hello, I’m Yi Fan. Have you not met my boyfriend yet? He practices Wushu on a daily basis.”

“And I’m Jong Dae,” Chen picks up when Kris finishes. “Mine also likes to practice martial arts in his spare time and is undoubtedly the strongest person here.”

Lu Han, knowing that both of them are telling the truth, stomps his foot in defeat before continuing on towards the kitchen, mumbling about how much he hates everybody. Kris and Chen have a little celebratory party, high fiving each other.

“Where did Min Seok go anyway?” Kris asks.

Chen shrugs. “He just said he was going out for a while to get some air. So my guess is he’s either at the basketball court or the martial arts place across the street from it.”

“And you just let him go?” Lu Han asks when he comes back into the living room, plopping himself down on Kris’s lap. “Some boyfriend you are. And you,” he says as he turns around a little to face Kris. “Don’t even try to move me. You’re softer than the couch, and since you’re the reason I’m hurting right now, I’m sitting here.”

“Yes, I just let him go,” Chen answers Lu Han’s question. “When Min Seok is upset, you just need to let him cool off by himself. Especially if you’re the reason he’s upset.”

“If it means anything,” Lu Han starts, reaching over and putting a hand behind Chen’s neck, pulling him closer to him and Kris, “I believe you guys.”

Pushing himself out of Lu Han’s hold, Chen fixes his shirt. “You also believed that Donald was a talking duck, hyung.”

“Donald is a talking duck, you dummy,” Lu Han says, rolling his eyes at the younger. “I’ll be right back,” he says as he hops off of Kris’s lap and runs to his room, returning seconds later with his favorite picture. “See?” he holds out the picture as he says it. “He talked and he signed this for me. Yi Fan was there!” he says, hopping back on Kris’s lap.

The sound of Kris’s phone ringing stops him from the jokes he feels himself wanting to make at Lu Han’s innocence. Without bothering to check it, he pushes Lu Han over to Chen’s lap and gets up, heading off to help the sick Panda in the bedroom.

_________________________________________

A/N: Annyeong~. I had most of this finished last night, but got too caught up in the live Dalmatian stream. Those guys are beyond adorable. By the time it was over, there was no way I was gonna finish this. ㅠ_ㅠ

Please tell me you've all seen the glorious pictures floating around on Tumblr today of Exo-M. So many gorgeous legs. And even a shot of Tao's backside. I swear, I gasped when I saw it. Bless whoever managed to get that. Unf.

@legna_angel - Yeah, I loved those Kris gifs the second I saw them. *_* Tao's stare + Kris's stare are just...indescribable. I swear I'm trying to work a TaoRisChen moment in there somewhere, just to get it out of my head. It'd have to be a TaoRisChenMin moment in this story though. D;  Maybe I'll just write a totally different one shot for this or something. Lol.
@ChoKyute - Maybe I'll just have to make Suho see that picture then. -Wiggles eyebrows with you-
@VitaminBuns - Lol. Endless hours. It wasn't that long of a wait. :P YunJae always having half-open shirts during perfs was bad enough, but then they had to let all 5 members go and do that, and it was just too much for my heart. xD
@animeotakupooh - I'm glad you think so. ^_^  Still seems too short to me~. 3
@starkey - Haha! But drunk Tao was so much fun to write~. *_*
@xxjenjaexx - I'm glad it got such a great reaction for you. Lol.
@underthetwomoons - Gah, and he was so much fun to write. If I don't write him drunk again, I'll definitely have to do it for somebody else. xD
@krismaticlove - I bet drunk Tao is a riot.

Hope you all enjoyed this update!