"The ability to be able to express something allowed me to think "I haven't lost everything" even when I felt like I had lost it all."
- Tablo.

Jaebeom lay on the floor of his apartment.
They say if you lay like this in an empty space, you're giving space for your mind to think more rationally.
Not for Jaebeom though.
It's not working at all.
His head was still clogged with too many things to think about. 

He had work so hard to get where he is and this is how all ends?
He cannot accept this no matter how nicely it's put.
His effort and time spend to be an idol like he is, is irreplaceable.
Unless he could get back what he's lost, nothing matters anymore. 

He gave up family and friends to be who he is and it now all gone to waste.  

Singing and dancing is his driven passion and now that he's forced to stop, it felt like everything was taken from him simply.
He felt like he's lost everything.
He had nothing anymore.
That was how he had spend his days now back in Seattle.

All seemed pointless.
He wanted to give up living even.
He walked around the neighbourhood to clear his mind sometimes and it was proven to be really helpful.

It was one day when he was attempting to not think about his crashed career that he saw a young man with no limbs to walk, playing his guitar, singing so passionately.
Then it struck him, everyone can sing and dance, no one can stop him either.
They can try but ultimately it's his own choice.

That was the start of Jaebeom's dancing hype. 

He got back home and all he did was dance and dance and dance until he felt so exhausted.
But at the end of it, he felt so satisfied.
For a long time now, he's exhausted because of dancing and not of over-thinking.
It felt good. 

It made him feel like he haven't lost everything when he really did.