g o l f
OPERATION: LOVE
The Authorities whispered among themselves, making discreet decisions upon the current reports. They are all much older men, ages range from late fifties to early eighties. These people preferred the traditional way of doing things and are especially strict on regulations. They often frowned upon the younger generations, judging that the “kids” are never good enough.
“Chief-Commander Park,” one out of the ten who’s presented in the room spoke up. The old man’s white patch of hair was combed flatly against his scalp. His eyes quint uncomfortably as if he’s still trying to adjust them to the brightness of the room.
“Yes, sir?” JYP responded, shifting slightly on his feet. He had been standing for two hours or so. The elders didn’t even bother to offer the younger agent a seat.
“How long is this Agent Im going to take? Time is of the essence here.”
“I am aware, sir. We have agreed to give my agent two months. What seems to be the problem, sir?” Honestly speaking, JYP hates how stuck-up these old men are. They annoy him so much. “If something is-“
“That doctor knows too much!” This time, the oldest one slammed his wrinkled palm hard on the table. JYP wondered if it had hurt the old man. “He needs to be eliminate immediately.”
“Excuse me, sir?” JYP furrowed his eyebrows quizzically. “Sir, I thought-“
“He’s a witness, Chief-Commander. He is a threat to this country, thus, he must be put down.”
JYP stared at the elder in pure horror. What the hell is going on?
“Your agent is doing a very awful job, I hope you’ve noticed that. Listen, there is no need to drag this out longer than necessary. We all have come to the decision that Choi Youngjae is a dangerous asset.”
“Asset? When has the orders change? Weren’t the orders was to retrieve something from the doctor?”
“There is no need for that now. There’s two option: one, kill him as soon as possible, or two, turn him in for interrogation,” the eldest stated venomously.
Chief-Commander Park took a deep breath. They know more than they let on. There’s definitely a lot more to this than a simple "threat to the country,” JYP figured as he reluctantly bowed and took the new order.
Closing the door behind him, Jinyoung Park sighed heavily, “What are you going to do, Jaebum…”
*
*
*
It’s not everyday that Youngjae gets a day off. A day off. Meaning he’ll be having night shifts. Youngjae despised night hours when he had just begin working, however, after some years, night shifts became one of those things that the doctor needed once in awhile. Just because he realized that night is when he feels the most alone, and he hates that .
Taking a sip of his morning coffee, Youngjae stared out to the outstretched view of the busy city during rush hours from the window wall of his penthouse. Everything below looked like rows of ants carrying their stolen goods back to their nest. The doctor isn’t complaining about this spectacular view of the city, because it is a beauty during nightfall. Youngjae just sometimes thought if he really needed all this luxury. Youngjae lives alone and barely home, so what’s the point in owning this huge space? Well, it wasn’t all the doctor’s idea to buy a penthouse anyways.
When Youngjae had landed a golden opportunity which then led him to his growing success, his first ever seven figures paycheck encouraged him to move out of his rundown studio apartment located in one of those lower-class district in Seoul. At that time, Jinyoung and Mark were newlyweds, so Youngjae couldn’t ask Jinyoung to be his roommate. But Jinyoung did dragged Youngjae around the upper-class side of Seoul, forcing the doctor to look at villas, mansions, and other very big structures of a house. It was after three days that Youngjae quietly said that he likes anything that’ll give him a lot of fresh air. His best friend’s eyes were burning with determination. And now, here he is, standing in the penthouse picked by an excited Jinyoung.
Youngjae really likes his home, he really does. Sure it was a bit ironic and uncomfortable that he’s living on the highest floor of a huge building when he harbors a fear of height, but the doctor got used to it after living for awhile. By now, Youngjae even feels bitter whenever he imagine himself coming home to somewhere else that is not his cozy penthouse. Although there’s not much memory he shares with the place, at least it gives him somewhere to return to. And Youngjae couldn’t be more grateful.
With one last look at the bright sky, Youngjae turned and walked towards the kitchen. He was washing his mug when the door system buzzed, at the same time, a melodic ringing filled up the place. Youngjae rarely gets visitor.
Must be Jinyoung-hyung, Youngjae thought.
And it was. With Mark-hyung as well.
“Good morning, sunshine,” Jinyoung greeted happily.
“Why am I not surprised,” Youngjae pressed his lips into a thin line. The doctor left the door for the couple and went back towards his couch. He sat down as a light slam was heard from the hallway. “So what did I do to deserve this honor?” Youngjae asked once he saw both Jinyoung and Mark heading to him.
“You sound quite disappointed,” Mark pointed out, sitting down next to Jinyoung. “Were you expecting someone else?”
Youngjae rolled his eyes, not one bit surprised that Mark knows about Jaebum. Mark always knows everything. “You’re dressed in suits,” Youngjae commented.
“Of course. We came here from work,” Jinyoung smiled. “Just thought we’ll drop by you for a bit, you know, checking up on how you’re doing and all.”
“Don’t be dramatic, Jinyoung-hyung. We literally just saw each other yesterday for lunch.”
“I know, right? That’s exactly what I’ve told him, too,” Mark sighed. Jinyoung glared a Mark for a brief moment. Mark rolled his eyes. “Jinyoungie actually just needs an excuse to bring me here to see you.”
Youngjae laughed sarcastically, “I don’t need to see you, Mark-hyung. I mean we haven’t seen each other once since you got back, which is like what, two weeks ago? So really, it’s fine.”
“Still,” Jinyoung started. “I just thought you two should meet and maybe sort whatever it is out, because honestly, I don’t like the feeling of being conflicted in between my best friend and my husband.” Jinyoung leaned into Mark, his lips protruding a pout.
Mark quirked an eyebrow, “Uh, baby, I don’t think Youngjae and I have anything to sort out…”
“If you count the whole Mark-hyung being a huge , then I guess we do have something to sort out,” Youngjae leaned back against the soft cushion of his sofa, arms crossing across his chest sassily.
“I dig how you call me with honorifics when in front of Jinyoung, but behind his back, you dropped it and resort to only my name or something along the line of an ,” Mark said. “Reminds me so much of my own that of a goddamn best friend,” he added after a pause.
Jinyoung and Mark both clearly noticed Youngjae’s visible body twitch. Jinyoung sunk further into Mark’s personal space. Mark didn’t mind it, instead he wrapped an arm over his husband’s shoulder, pulling him closer.
Youngjae cleared his throat awkwardly, “Ahem. Yeah, I can call you whatever I feel like calling,” the doctor fixed his vision on the couple, “But hyungnim, you know I appreciate you, right?”
Mark smiled kindly, “I know.”
Youngjae flashed a small smile back, “Good.”
Jinyoung couldn’t help but feel lighthearted and satisfied. He loves it when they get along so nicely since it doesn’t happen often. Normally, Youngjae and Mark would banter childishly with feigned contempts. But then that’s just the way the two showed their love for each other: through sarcastic remarks and name calling.
“But really though,” Youngjae sighed, “What you did was completely stupid like I can’t believe you could even think of something like that. Were you crazy or some ? Seriously? It makes no sense whatsoever. What were you thinking?” The doctor rambled on, forgetting that Jinyoung was actually sitting there. “I swear to God, I was so angry at you. And all I could think of was tracking your down and beat the out of you. I respect you, Mark-hyung, I really do. But my Jinyoung don’t deserve to be cast aside like that. So at that time, all respect I’ve ever hold for you went disappearing out the window. If it weren’t for Jinyoung’s desperate attempts at stopping me from grabbing a gun, then you’re probably be dead by now. I just-“ Youngjae sighed again, this time his hand covered his eyes. “I’m sorry. I know it’s all over, but I’m just-“
“I’m an , I know,” Mark said calmly. “It’s my fault. Damn, the whole idea was stupid. I don’t even know how the did I even convinced my idiotic self to do all that. You have all the reasons to be mad. I don’t blame you. Thank you, Youngjae, for being by Jinyoung when I couldn’t.” Mark smiled, looking at Youngjae with such gratitude and brotherly love for the youngest.
Jinyoung squirmed subtly in Mark’s hold, trying to get comfortable, “He’s always there since the beginning, even without you in the picture.” There’s no possible words that’s loving enough to describe how much Jinyoung adores and love Youngjae.
“You ever wonder how the hell is Mark-hyung always so calm and composed, no matter in what kind of situation?” Youngjae wrinkled his nose. “It always amaze me.”
Mark laughed, “You sure? I think it’s Jinyoung who’s more collected than I am.”
“You’re right, Youngjae. You should have seen his face when he broke up with me. I swear he was so good at it that now, I’m a bit suspicious.”
“Oh my, God, Jinyoung, sweetheart, don’t say that!” Mark looked down at Jinyoung, genuinely offended. “I love you. And that was a one time thing for fun, although I know it wasn’t supposed to be funny. But I love you.”
Youngjae grinned at the way Jinyoung’s cheeks suddenly turned thirty-three shades redder as the agent tried to hide his face by leaning more against his husband. Mark smirked in amusement with hearted eyes as he watches Jinyoung's failed attempt at burying his rose colored face in the crook of Mark’s neck. Youngjae sighed in content, they’re so adorable, lord, help me.
“Stop that,” Jinyoung bit his lower lip, cheeks still flaming, “Youngjae’s here.”
“Oh, no, please, don’t mind me,” Youngjae chuckled. Looking at Jinyoung and Mark all cuddly and happy give the doctor some odd satisfaction. It’s like since he can’t find his own happiness, he enjoys it when he sees others happy.
Suddenly, Jaebum’s face flashes Youngjae’s mind. The doctor immediately froze. He gasped. This can’t be happening.
“Youngjae? What’s wrong?” Mark asked.
Youngjae swallowed, “Um.. Uh.. N-nothing.. Nothing’s wrong.. I.. I just…” Youngjae exhaled loudly, trying desperately to clear his head. But more and more images of a certain Captain kept popping up and teasing the panicking doctor. “I… I’m fine.” Youngjae’s voice was too shaky to be at least bit of convincing.
Jinyoung looked fully concerned, however, he knew what was going on. But he didn’t want to press on it because Mark was sitting right next to him, so he turned to his husband, “Why don’t you go on ahead, honey. I’ll see you back at the headquarters, yeah?” Jinyoung smiled warmly.
Mark understood right away. “All right,” Mark removed himself from Jinyoung and got up. The Captain glanced at Doctor Choi who’s still sitting with his attention glued to the fuzzy fabric of his gray rug. Jinyoung walked Mark out to the front door. Mark lightly pecked his husband on the lips, “Make sure he’s okay.” Jinyoung nodded.
Youngjae still has his head down when Jinyoung returned. The agent sat down next to his doctor best friend. A comfortable silence set in. Jinyoung is willing to give Youngjae all the time he needed. But the Vice Captain still has work, so it kind of limits the time a bit.
“Hey,” Jinyoung said, “What is it?”
Youngjae laced his fingers together and rested his elbows on his thighs, leaning over as he sighed heavily, “It’s Jaebum.” The doctor knows that it wasn’t a surprise for Jinyoung. Nowadays, the only problem that Youngjae has to deal with is Jaebum. “You know, we went on so many dinner and breakfast dates that I’ve lost count. And I swear it’s only been a little more than a week. Jinyoung, every time we go out like that, I learn something new about him. Jaebum, he takes this whole thing so seriously that it scares me. I mean, I’m just messing around, you know? I’m not actually falling for him or anything along that line…” A pause. Youngjae contemplates what to say next that doesn’t sound like he’s into this deeper than he thought. Obviously, Jinyoung knows anyways. But Youngjae still wanted self-reassurance.
“You’re thinking too hard, Youngjae-ah,” Jinyoung rubbed his hand over his best friend’s shoulder. “Just spill it out. You don’t have to hide anything from me. I know you too well.”
“I’m not ready, Jinyoung,” Youngjae leaned back against the couch, his face paler, his eyes screaming in pain, “I can’t-“ He paused again. He exhaled shakily. “This is too much… Jinyoung, I-I keep on thinking about her.”
Jinyoung flinched. He did not expect Youngjae to bring this up. A sudden rush of adrenaline consumed the agent’s body. He balled his fist in build-up frustration and buried anger. “Youngjae,” Jinyoung called, voice restrained from an outburst of contempt. “Don’t even go there. You’re pass this, Youngjae-ah. As much as I hate Jaebum right now, but I can tell you that Jaebum is not her. He will never be. He’s better.” Jinyoung looked over at Youngjae. The doctor’s eyes were focused on him. And Jinyoung wants to run, because he hates seeing Youngjae so ing broken.
“Jinyoung-hyung,” Youngjae’s voice came out barely a whisper, “I know. He’s different. Gender wise and basically everything wise. But what if-“
“No,” Jinyoung deadpanned.
“Hyung-“
“Don’t you hyung me. You only call me that when you’re like this.”
A strange brick wall was blocking Jinyoung from getting to Youngjae. Since that incident, Youngjae had unconsciously withdrew himself. And Jinyoung swears he just wants to use his resources to track down that and strangles her. The nights that Youngjae had spent crying himself to sleep were etched vividly in Jinyoung’s mind like a sacred religion. The nights that Youngjae had spent binging on bottles after bottles of wine and beer were carved into Jinyoung’s brain like a living virus. And Jinyoung hates it.
But then again, Jaebum isn’t actually any better. Youngjae is living in Jaebum’s lie. And it’s a disgusting lie. Jinyoung wants to throw up. All of this is wrong.
The doctor sighed heavily and covered his face with his hands, “Can this stop? I want it to stop. Please, stop it.”
On instinct, Jinyoung moved in and wrapped his sturdy arms around his best friend, “Let me help, Youngjae-ah. You don’t have to go through this alone.” The agent choked back the threatening tears. Why does it has to be Youngjae?
Youngjae shook his head as he laid it
against Jinyoung’s firm shoulder. It’s all coming back again. Youngjae could feel it. He could feel himself falling again. And he’s not sure if, like last time, anyone will be there to catch him.
“You know,” Youngjae sniffled, definitely holding back those liquid streams of pain. Jinyoung only pulled the fragile doctor closer, hoping he can somehow ease Youngjae’s endless thorns of torture. Youngjae snuggled securely against Jinyoung’s much larger figure. “I tried helping myself so, so, so many times… It never worked. And I didn’t have to wonder why… ”
*
*
*
Captain Im shuffled through the huge pile of papers in a mindless manner, obviously does not care for it at all. Throwing the files off to the side of his desk, Jaebum ran a hand through his hair, messing it up frustratingly. What is it? What. Is. It.
His Boss had stopped by just moments ago to drop some news from the meeting this morning. Jaebum grimaced as soon as he saw the strained features on JYP’s usual energetic face. However, the blood drained from the Captain’s face when the words that came out of the older man’s mouth finally registered through his sensitive ears. All Jaebum did was stared at JYP in shock or any other emotions that contribute itself to wrath. The Boss had pressed his lips into a thin line, and with a nod, JYP calmly displaced himself from Im Jaebum’s office. Since then, Jaebum went frantically searching through a lot of stuff, looking for something. Something. Even Jaebum doesn’t know what exactly he’s looking for. But he looked anyway.
By now, the agent’s desk is a mess. Papers were scattered everywhere. Some pens and journals were knocked aimlessly on the floor. Jaebum paced back and forth. His face already contorted into a dissatisfying frown. His head whipped around left and right, eyes sharply scanning. Nothing caught his attention. Jaebum tiredly sighed and slumped down on his chair, relaxing into the comfortable cushion. His eyes slowly closed.
It wasn’t for long and Jinyoung already waltzed into his Captain’s office without any warning beforehand. The Vice Captain stopped his preceding before he steps on some confidential paper. “Jaebum, what are you doing?” Jinyoung raised a questionable eyebrow, genuinely curious at to why were there papers everywhere on the forest green carpet.
“Jinyoung,” Jaebum sat up in his chair so quickly, like a child who’s excited because of a brand new toy, “Thank God. You’re here. Where were you?”
“At Youngjae’s,” was the respond.
“Oh,” Jaebum completely halted whatever his hands were doing and stared at his Vice. “But I thought he has work…?”
“Very late night shift,” Jinyoung stared back though his eyes were more menacing.
And then it was just silence. Working together for so many years, the two had adapted to the path way of communicating through eyes. Jaebum knows what is being said without it being actually said. Right now, Jinyoung’s eyes are piercing strong words like “back the off” and all Jaebum could do was send an apologetic look.
It’s too deep now. They want him dead.
Jaebum noticed how hard Jinyoung is clenching his fists. The whites of his knuckles bled in front of his protruding bones. At this moment, Jaebum feels lucky about the fact that he’s a Captain, because if he weren’t, he’ll already be mangled into pieces by an angry bull across from him.
“I don’t want…” Jaebum struggled to get the honest words out. “I… I… I don’t want him dead, Jinyoung-ah. I’d hate it.”
Jinyoung carefully observes the way Jaebum’s sharp eyes soften almost immediately for a tiny second. Jaebum sighed and broke their intense staring game, going back to madly searching through the files.
The realization smashed Jinyoung in his face.
Im Jaebum is stalling.
*
*
*
Why do people who I don’t want to see right now always shows up? Youngjae sighed for probably the millionth time tonight. After that talk with Jinyoung, all the doctor wanted to do was to curled up in his bed and sleeps away the problem. But when has life been fair? So here he is, standing behind the front desk of Seoul’s largest hospital. And here he is, eyeing the last person he wanted to see.
“Youngjae-“ Sana approached stealthily.
“Oh, my God! What the hell, Sana? You scared me!”
The nurse just rolled her eyes, “You’re just too busy ogling over a very, very hot guy. I know he’s beautiful, but it would be very, very useful if you don’t daydream about having him on your bed so much.”
Youngjae looked at Sana, “Seems like you’re speaking from experience.”
“Shut up,” it was too late for Sana to hide that blush behind her clipboard.
Youngjae chuckled. Sana playfully slapped him on his arm, telling him to shut up before the guy hears.
“But he’s here to see you though,” Sana said.
“You don’t know that,” Youngjae wrinkled his nose.
“Uh, actually, yes, I do, in fact, the whole hospital do. Who else would he be here to see besides his boyfriend?” Sana bit back a teasing smirk.
“You’re being ridiculous,” Youngjae rolled his eyes sassily. “He doesn’t even know I have a night shift tonight. He might just be here ‘cause he’s hurting somewhere and-“
“Needs a doctor?” Sana wriggled her eyebrows in a very suggestive manner. “A doctor who would take off his shirt to tenderly checks if he has any wounds? A doctor who would run the tip of his fingers over those delicious abs and teasingly going lower-“
“Oh my ing God! Stop! My innocent ears!” Youngjae quickly clasped both of his hands over his precious ears.
Sana could not stop giggling, “Your face is red~ Are you imagining? You’re such a naughty boy, Doctor Choi~”
Youngjae pouted, “No! I’m not! I’m just a bit sensitive… God, I really need to get laid.”
“Yeah, I’m sure your hot Captain wouldn’t mind bedding you. You should tell him-“
“Sana, I have all the rights to fire you right on the spot,” Youngjae deadpanned, arms crossed annoyingly against his chest.
“All right, all right, I was just kidding,” Sana laughed, enjoying how awfully cute the doctor is looking with pouting lips and arms crossed like that. “But just so you know, your little hospital fan club is pretty bumped about you being taken. It’s tragic, really. The cutest doctor isn’t available for grabs anymore.”
Youngjae quirked an eyebrow.
“I, however, very much approve of this. Like you don’t see this everyday, you know? How hot can this get, I mean, an agent and a doctor? Come on, sign me up!” Sana squealed excitedly.
“Didn’t you have a crush on him?”
“I did, but I like him better with you. He’s so sweet around you. And his eyes are always so soft when looking at you instead of all imitating when he looks at other people.” Sana commented sincerely.
“W-what are you talking about…”
“It’s true. I’m a bystander, so it’s obvious. You never notice because you’re just playing with him, aren’t you, Youngjae-ah?” This time, Sana looked at Youngjae seriously.
“I…”
“I’m disappointed in you, really. You shouldn’t play around with someone’s heart like that. You’re straight, Youngjae. I know you are, so it surprised me when I heard you suddenly have a boyfriend escorting you. Youngjae-“
“I don’t like your tone right now, Sana,” Youngjae’s arms dropped to his sides, his fists balling up. “You’re accusing me of something I didn’t even start in the first place. Why am I getting the for something I didn’t ing do? All I did was gave him a chance! Is that wrong?!” Things that bottled up deep within Youngjae sprung up and mixed with the rage that he’s been keep in for God knows how long.
“Youngjae…” Sana looked mortified. She’d never seen Youngjae like this. The doctor has always been the hospital’s little sunshine. The nurse didn’t even know Youngjae is capable of lashing out this amount of anger.
Realizing what he’s doing, Youngjae exhaled slowly, calming himself down, “I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have… It’s just… Everything that had ever happened to me seems like it’s my fault… I’m really sorry, Sana.”
Sana soften her eyes, a sympathetic look crossed her doe eyes, “You want to talk about it?”
“No, I’m fine, really,” Youngjae shook his head dismissively.
“Youngjae-“
“I said I’m fine!” And the doctor snapped again. The nurse took a step back. Youngjae hated himself for letting out his anger on others. He should just handle them himself instead of going off on innocent people. “Oh, my God. I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry, Sana. I’m sorry-“
A hand rested gently on the doctor’s forearm, “Hey, you’re all right?” The words came out in a soothing voice of comfort. Youngjae was tempted to just melt away under the softness of that voice. The grip on the doctor’s arm tighten a little as in a way of saying “I’m here for you.”
“Jaebum…” Youngjae gasped quietly. “When did you… H-how much did-did you’ve heard…?”
“Enough to know you’re tired,” Jaebum replied, hand still holding firmly on Youngjae’s arm. The agent turned to a now much more relaxed nurse, “If you don’t mind, we’ll excuse ourselves.”
“No, go ahead,” Sana smiled lightly. “Take care of him.” She added after noticing the eerie look that evidenced obviously in Jaebum’s cold eyes. He clearly is bothered by her presence, for whatever reason that is, he doesn’t like her here. Scratch that. He doesn’t like her anywhere near Youngjae.
*
*
*
“Here,” Jaebum passed a worn out Youngjae a mug of warm coffee that the agent somehow managed to make in the nurses’ lounge.
“Thank you,” Youngjae accepted it with a forced smile.
They’re in Youngjae’s office now, sitting on the couch. Jaebum had already shrugged off his leather jacket before he took a seat next to Youngjae, not too close but not too far either. Their thighs are probably inches away from touching. Jaebum’s hands are itching to place them on top of Youngjae’s. However, the agent hands were busy gripping tightly onto the glass of iced water, trying to refrain his traitorous fingers from reaching over.
“So…” Jaebum started after not being able to swallow the silence anymore. “Is everything okay?”
“How come you know I have a night shift today?”
“What a way to dodge my question. You’re just like Jinyoung,” Jaebum scoffed. “I heard it from Jinyoung that you were going to be here tonight.” The agent took a sip of his water. The cold liquid slid down his throat, making the agent shivered a bit.
“Oh.” Youngjae awkwardly rubbed his hands on the smooth surface of the mug. “Why are you here… ?”
Jaebum put his glass of water down on the table in front of them. The agent rested his elbows on his knees, clasping his hands together, “To see you, of course. But I’m sorry if you’re busy… I thought-“
“It’s okay, business is low at the moment anyways,” Youngjae quietly said, his head hung wearily. “They’ll call when they need me.”
Jaebum looked over at Youngjae, studying the doctor’s facial features. “What Sana said earlier-“
“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it,” Youngjae quickly cuts in, his eyes are now widely staring into Jaebum’s. “She loves to tease me like that-“
“You guys are close,” Jaebum suddenly commented. “Did you two happen to…”
“Oh, no. God, no. She’s like a sister to me,” Youngjae defended. “Why would you think that?” The doctor cringed at the image of him and Sana being lovey-dovey towards each other.
“Well, from far away, you and her looked great together,” Jaebum hated how he couldn’t stop that remark from sounding purely sarcastic.
Youngjae laughed, “No, we don’t! That’s insane!”
Jaebum thank God for Youngjae’s oblivious nature. It’ll be a problem if Youngjae points out Jaebum’s jealousy, and it’ll also be a problem if Jaebum undeniably admit that he’s jealous. Which he wasn’t. He wasn’t jealous at all. Why should he be?
“Hey, I know we don’t know each other very well, but I’m here if you need someone to talk to…” Jaebum offered carefully.
Youngjae stopped laughing and stared at Jaebum. The agent felt weak under Youngjae’s piercing gaze. Jaebum held his breath. He hopes that Youngjae doesn't hear the loud beating of his aching heart. They held each other’s gaze for so long that time drowned within an eternity of tension and emotions.
Unknowingly their thighs touched. Unknowingly their faces appeared right in front of each other’s. Unknowingly their lips were merely centimeters apart. Unknowingly Jaebum tear his eyes away from Youngjae’s and lingered on the doctor’s lips instead. Unknowingly Jaebum leaned in a little more.
Jaebum watches as Youngjae nervously his dried bottom lip. God, if that didn’t encouraged Jaebum, then he doesn’t know what does. The agent reached up and ran his thumb along the doctor’s jawline. His hand came to rest comfortably on the nape of Youngjae’s slender neck. Jaebum’s other free hand caressed Youngjae’s cheek tenderly. Jaebum studied Youngjae’s face. The doctor’s face was in a daze; his eyes were peering at Jaebum through those long lashes, his plump lips were parted slightly. He looked beautiful.
Jaebum hesitated for a moment but decided against the screaming angelic voice in his head, telling him to stop; the demon within him wakens. Jaebum slowly closing the small distance between them, “Youngjae,” he whispered sweetly, “Can I…”
It wasn’t a question. Because Jaebum was planning on doing it anyways. There’s so little to his control. This is wrong. This is wrong. Jaebum! STOP! Don’t do this! This. Is. Wrong.
*
*
*
Before their lips meet, Youngjae hastily pulled away from Jaebum’s hold. The agent was surprised and a bit irritated from the interruption. The doctor was shaking all over.
“I-I’m sor-sorry…” Youngjae gasped out, his fingers fidgeting. “I-I-“
“Hey, Youngjae…” Jaebum is worried now. Youngjae looked like he’s about to cry. “Are you all right?” The agent placed a hand on the doctor’s shoulder to steady him.
To Jaebum’s shock, Youngjae smacked his hand away, then stared at Jaebum like a deer in headlights. “Oh my God. I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that. I’m sorry! I-“ Youngjae paused to take a deep breath.
“Youngjae-“
“I need to go- I need some air. I’m-I’m sorry…”
Jaebum didn’t get to say anything else since Youngjae had already got up and left the room like someone was after his life, slamming the door behind him. It wasn’t until a couple of minutes later of staring at the door that Jaebum swallowed hard.
Out of his entire life, Im Jaebum finally got a taste of how awfully painful it is to be rejected by someone you love.
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