DONGHAE'S POV

“Go, go, go, go! !” Hyukjae yelled at the TV as he stood up angrily throwing popcorn at the screen as he watched the player miss yet another goal.

“Is he for real!?”  asked Kyuhyun, plopping down onto the couch in defeat "Was that guy even looking? Is like he was aiming for the sun” he complained.

“I know right!? His chance was right there and the er blew it!” That one was me.

Allow me to explain the situation for you: My roommate Sungmin had the “brilliant” idea to invite his boyfriend and his ex to watch the game at our place. I’m happy neither of the aforementioned find the setting awkward at all and I’m super happy they can all be friends and enjoy a game of soccer. But what about me, though? Didn’t it ever occur to Sungmin that maybe, just maybe, it would be awkward for me to have Hyuk over, especially when he himself is all over Kyuhyun and I’m left figuratively alone with my crush as if it were a double date.

Now, if it were any other day, say... 2 weeks ago, this would be the perfect opportunity and I’d be worshipping Sungmin’s brilliance right now, but since it’s today, under the current circumstances, I’m not so sure I want to be around the guy I like but can’t have.

So I sulked for the most part, cheered when it was appropriate and complained when the others did, as if I were actually focusing on the game. Yeah right! Who in their right mind would actually watch the game (it’s not even my team, mind you) when Lee Hyukjae is jumping up and down in all of his sweaty shirtless glory? No? Thought so…

I barely even noticed when it ended, unaware of the final score, but I know their team won because they’re cheering loudly and Kyuhyun is hugging Min and Hyuk would have probably taken off his shirt to flail it in the air if he had still been wearing it, but he’s not, so instead he decided to hug me and lift me up and spin me around, like, Oh my God! He hugged me! I mean, he was all sweaty and is not like we haven’t done more, but, still!

“Guys, we should go somewhere to celebrate!” Kyuhyun suggested loudly.

“Meh, I’m not really in the mood to go out right now” Hyukjae says.

“Well, how about I buy some beer” Sungmin says.

“Cool” Hyuk again. Sorry my narration is so lame right now, but guys, he’s still shirtless, you can’t expect my brain to function properly, you just can’t.

“I’ll go with you” Kyuhyun offered, sharing a look with Sungmin that I couldn’t fully grasp the meaning of, but they’re onto something, surely.

“Extra cool” Hyuk tells them while looking at me in a way I’ve never experienced before, sending me a smirk that’s probably not meant to be seductive but I still feel like melting under his gaze.

Sungmin then grabs his jacket and wallet, Kyuhyun grabs the keys, but before they leave, Minnie comes back to me while Kyuhyun talks to Hyuk in whispers, of which I could only make out the word ‘time’ in there somewhere.

“Donghae, Hyukkie is going to take a shower now” am I allowed to be jealous that he still calls him with such an intimate endearment? I believe it isn’t my place to feel like this but it still bothers me somehow “I advise you take that time to check your facebook and mentally prepare yourself” huh? Prepare for what? Being alone with Hyukkie? Too late friend, I’m already having a mental break down as it is. And what's that about Facebook? I always swear off social media and any other kind of distraction when I’m studying for my finals so I might be a little lost about whatever current event he considers so important, but I don’t believe this is the time “I know you’re confused, Hae, but this is something I’d rather you see for yourself, so listen to me just this once and check your facebook” Fine, mom.

When the happy couple finally left to buy the beer, which I have the feeling will take them more than necessary, Hyukjae went to take a shower just like Sungmin predicted. It was obvious enough with how sweaty he was from having come straight from the dance studio. Did I ever mention he’s a very talented dance teacher? He can dance, I can dance… We could dance together!

But enough of that, I wait until I can hear the shower running before logging into my facebook page through my phone, not surprised by the amount of notifications since it’s always the same after exams week. A bunch of stupid status updates and an even bigger bunch of selcas courtesy of my many facebook friends that aren’t really friends of mine.

In the midst of it all, there was a new picture uploaded by my ultimate nemesis (AKA Hyukjae’s new boyfriend AKA “Yesunggie”) in which “Eunhyuk” had been tagged. The picture itself already had me in a bad mood, they looked so happy together and the offensive nature of the caption showed just how comfortable they already felt with the other, not to mention the fact that they went Karaoke. But what surprised me the most was the amount of comments it had, not so much the likes since I already learned I must live with everyone else supporting them like they would their OTP, I can almost hear the fangirls arguing over (who tops who) ship names.

So I went on to read the comments:

At first it was funny, then it got awkwardly ual, then some Wookie guy came to save the day along with Sungmin, then I was hit in the face with the realization that they went alone but decided to ignore it because what did I expect?

Wait.

Huh?

…

…

…

HUUUUH!?!??!

“What the do you mean you “ain’t” together!?” did I say that out loud? Well you can’t ing blame me! He said they aren’t together! Him and hyuk! Not together! But why is he using quotes? is it because they ARE or he just dislikes the wording? I must know the truth. So I read on:

Huh?

…

…

…

“They aren’t dating!!” I screamed again, fully conscious that it came out loud but not caring in the slightest as it was more of joy than from actual shock. He’s single now! Never mind the fight that began afterwards, I don’t care about that. About 5 chapters ago I swore to myself that the moment I catch him single again I’ll make my move and that moment is now.

“Took you a while to find out” came a rich voice from behind me which belonged to a y and almost- (damn you towel) Hyukjae coming out from the bathroom “I would have expected you to find out sooner with how much you stalk my wall” he added with a smirk, leaning against the wall behind him with no intention to leave and get dressed.

“I-I uhmmm, I don’t… I-I, well… I don’t!” Oh for goodness sake! Stop stuttering you idiot! This is your chance, this is not the time to be a love struck teenage girl!

“Hae, don’t be shy, I never said I was mad about it” he said, walking closer with a mischievous smirk on his face, every bit aware that his upper body bareness made me even more nervous “Just relax, ok?” he added as he stood in front of me and leaned down to face me since I was still sitting on the couch, frozen “Is not that you were being obvious or anything, I just happen to have downloaded a profile views counter” he explained, resting his weight in his outstretched arms that were propped on the back of the couch on both sides of my luckily-not-trembling body.

Our faces were so close to each other I had the uncontrollable urge to just close the distance, but I was already a stalker in his book so I didn’t want to seem even more desperate by stealing a second kiss.

“Then I… I-I suppose you figured it out, huh?” I managed to ask with a not-so-severe stutter, trying to not make myself look even more pathetic than I probably already did.

“Not really” he said simply as he retreated, making me sigh in relief at the much needed distance he put between us “I’m dense as gold. Even after you kissed me” I blushed at the casual reminder “It never occurred to me that you could be attracted to me because I always thought you only liked girls” he explained, walking towards my room “I would have actually never found out by myself” and while his back was still turned to me, he added “Word of advise: Minnie can’t keep a secret to save his life” then he went into the bedroom and I was left alone in the living room, still pretty much frozen although for different reasons. I was left to mull over his words, quickly remembering that fated morning.

His lips were kissing down my spine, warm hands caressing my sides then coming to a stop on my hips, gripping them firmly to guide my inexperienced movements, matching my sloppy pace with the wild one of his harsh s as he abused my hole from behind, the slap of his balls hitting my cheeks filling the entire room, harmonizing perfectly with our panting breaths, breathy moans of his name and pleasured grunts of mine being the perfect lyrics to accompany the sinful melody.

“Ahhh! Ahhh! Hyukkie! I’m, aaah!” I screamed as I came in my own fist  as the warm water ran down my heated skin, a poor imitation of the passionate caress I was longing for.

“What the !?” came the loud and surprised yell of my roommate as he pushed the shower curtain open “Hae! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” he asked as I scrambled around to protect what little was left of my dignity, red from embarrassment “Don’t tell me what I just heard was my ex’s name, please don’t”.

“I can explain” I defended as I covered my manhood with my hands, resigning to the fact that my towel was outside and couldn’t grab it with him standing there.

“And explain you will! I thought you were straight!” he reprimanded, looking more confused than angry but still unhappy with the discovery.

“Can I get dressed first?”

…

…

…

“Hold up, so you like guys?” he asked after I pseudo-explained that I had felt attracted to Hyuk for a long time

“I never said that” I sigh in exasperation because he still doesn’t seem to get it “I’ve never looked at any guy twice before, but he just… I don’t know man, I just like him alot and I don’t know why I don’t care that he’s a guy” I explained farther, seeing some kind of realization down on his face as confusion was replaced with mischief “I would appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone, he’s dating that guy now so I’d rather not make it awkward for all of us” I said with a pleading look.

“oh, I get it now, don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me”

“Safe, my !”

“I hope you’ve learned your lesson” was Hyukjae’s unexpected reply as he exited my room, fully clothed, in my clothes.

“Sure I have, and I’ll kick his as for sure!” I say distractedly, still submerged in my anger and frustration at the situation my supposed friend put me in. But an hypnotic laugh pulls me out of my reverie.

“Well, now you know” he said in between chuckles as he came to sit beside me “And I know as well” he added in a teasing tone. Then I felt a figurative bucket of cold water drop over my head. Exactly how much does he know? Sungmin wouldn’t have told him about my morning shower activities… would he?

“Even though he told me everything, all of it, if you're wondering” he began, confirming my worst fear, turning my face so read I could be a traffic light, which he found amusing judging by the bright grin that lit his face, pink gums and all, that beautiful smile that I love so much “I still want to hear it from you” he finished as he leaned closer and cupped my cheek softly.

“I...Hyukjae” I sigh and close my eyes, taking a moment to find the right words. Now that it has come to this, us being alone, sitting so close together, with his hand caressing my face so sweetly, I don’t know what to do.

“I won’t force you to say something you don’t feel” he said coldly after I had remained silent for too long, misinterpreting my lack of response, retreating his hand and moving a bit away from me “If you’re confused about it then-”

“No!” I interrupted him, afraid of what he would say next “I’m not confused! I like you, I can be sure of that much” I confessed hastily, pleading with my eyes for him to believe me “But you’re a guy so this is all new to me and I don’t know what to do an-”

This time he was the one to close the distance, shutting me up with his lips against mine, the movements were sweet but surer than last time, on both parts. I was already reaching out to tread my fingers through his dark hair to deepen the kiss but he was already pulling away.

“I know Hae, first times are always messy” he joked, hinting at a past I wanted to know all about “Listen, I can’t tell you I’ve always liked you because I was with Min and when I’m with someone, I don’t have eyes for anyone around me” he begins to explain without letting go of my hand that I never even noticed he had been holding “But you’re someone I always liked to talk to, we have a lot of things in common and I love your personality. There are a bunch of things I like about you that I simply never noticed before, but I do now. Ever since that kiss I’ve been thinking a lot and… I believe this could really go somewhere if we give it a chance, even though I can’t say I feel the same way as you yet” - he said, looking into my eyes, with his full of hope, an unsaid “...eventually” lingered in the silence, a promise, a future, a possibility; a ‘maybe’ that I was determined to turn into a ‘definitely’.

And the first step towards that goal was a ‘yes’, a ‘yes, of course’, an excited and almost too eager ‘you don’t even need to ask’, but he hadn’t asked, there hadn’t been a single question in his tone even though it had been laced with doubt. There really was no need to ask and he knew that, we both did; because the answer was too obvious so the question would have been dumb, because things were meant to be this way, always had.

It was simply meant to be. We are meant to be. And as our lips move together lovingly, I practically lay over his lap after having jumped him like I said I would, arms around his neck as he holds the back of my neck to keep me in place.

“So are you my boyfriend now?” I asked after I pulled away because I needed to know, not because I’m obsessed with labels, but I need to know where we stand right now.

“Well” he seems to hesitate for a second before the smile returns to his now reddened lips “I’m not sure we can call this” he said as he pointed towards me then himself “being in a relationship. For now, I wouldn’t say it’s something official” he says and my face drops a bit, it’s already good as it is, he’s giving me, us, a chance and I should take what I can get but the thought of us seeing each other unofficially opens the door to unwanted possibilities of the polygamous kind (read: Yesunggie) and I don’t think my heart could take it “However, and this is non-negotiable, we are exclusive.” he explained, arms coming around my waist in a possessive fashion that I’ve always found the most endearing, filling my heart with joy that threatens to spill in the form of happy tears that I’m finding it hard to hold inside “I’m very sensitive with infidelity so always keep that in mind, that’s my only rule” he finished and I nod eagerly because I couldn't agree more and his beautiful gummy smile reappears on his face and I can’t stop myself from kissing it away, but I can feel against my lips that it has only gotten bigger.

We’re not exactly together.

But he’s mine now, only mine.

Finally!