HYUKJAE POV •

Oh, a knock? Who could it be at this time? Maybe Shindong forgot something, or Sora-noona forgot her keys, whatever, as long as it isn’t some unexpected guest because I am not in the mood for anything besides sleeping right now.

But as luck would have it, the person at the other side of the door is no other than Lee Sungmin, sporting a bright smile. I’m invaded by the urge to shut the door on his nose but he seems to have read my mind as he steps in quickly before I get the chance to.

“Hello babe” he greets cheerfully, his mood so bright probably because of the amazing day he just spend with his lover boy. He doesn’t kiss me or anything, not that I would have let him, and simply walks past me to sit on the couch.

“What are you doing here?” I ask as I close the door, resigning to the fact that he already made himself comfortable and is not leaving anytime soon. I know I should take this opportunity to confront him but I don’t think I’m ready yet, I wasn’t expecting to meet him this soon.

“Haesica is fighting in my apartment” he explained simply, pulling the smallest of smiles on my lips as the silly couple name amused me "Plus I wanted to see you, there’s something I need to tell you” he pauses and suddenly becomes serious, pulling my hands so that I sit beside him, wanting to look at me in the eye as he tells me whatever it is that he came to say “Hyuk, truth is… I know this will sound awful and I’m so very sorry but… I met someone” he confesses, shocking me. I had not been expecting him to come and tell me this, to tell the truth at any point, I believed he’d keep the lie going for as long as I’d believe it, that’s what I’m used. This, however, I don’t know how to react to “It’s Kyuhyun… I know I said I would never cheat on you and believe me baby, I tried. We both tried our hardest to stay platonic and be just friends because I didn’t want to hurt you but… it happened” he explained, eyes casted down in regret, sincere regret; I could hear the honesty in his words and I was still unsure what to make of it so I let him continue “It was only once but I felt so bad about it, we went back to being just friends because I felt so bad I had cheated on you, yet… he told me today to leave you so that we could be together and I swear I said NO, but then he told me to choose whatever made me the happiest and…” a knot had formed in his throat, it was clear he found it hard to say but he went on “I really like him Hyuk, I honestly do and… I know we’ve been together for so long but lately… our relationship hasn’t been the same and I just want to chase my own happiness for once. I believe he can make me happy and it isn’t something I want to feel ashamed of. I don’t want to lie to you and hurt you by being with him behind your back so I just… I just think it’s better if we let this end”

End? He’s leaving me to be with Kyuhyun? To chase his own happiness? For some reason the statement fails to bring tears to my eyes and he isn’t crying either. For the first time in my life I’m not being lied to, he’s leaving me, for real, he’s letting go of what we have before pursuing something new, he’s… setting me free.

“Thank you” I say softly, making him look up in shock, as he eyes try to catch a sarcastic sneer on my lips but there’s none “You have no idea what it means to me that you're being honest about your affair” it means the world "I already knew about you two and I was so pissed off that you had been unfaithful too” he looks confused as he hears my confession and the calm in my voice as I say it  "But now that I know what exactly happened I can’t be mad, not when you sound so honestly sorry about what you did”  I say with a soft smile, cupping his face gently “You’re right, we haven’t been the same lately, the best we can do is let go and like you said… chase our own happiness” I finish as my thumb swipes away a tear falling down his cheek, he looks touched, relieved, happy and proud. I lean in to give him a last kiss goodbye, chaste and loving, all feelings conveyed in the gentle brush of my lips against his then it’s all gone, all over.

Letting go has never been this easy. Because this is the first time someone's letting me go.

He ended up spending the night as he had intended initially to avoid a certain bickering couple back at his place. There was no spare room so we shared a bed and it was surprisingly not awkward at all. We chatted all night long, catching up on all the things I sadly realized he had stopped himself from telling me before in fear that I’d have another jealousy attack. I found myself listening to all his stories, laughing comfortably like we used to, not bothered by all the times Kyuhyun was mentioned, understanding now how they had come to be so close together after hearing all the experiences they shared. There wasn’t a pang in my heart at the sight of the smile on his face and the glint in his eyes whenever he spoke of the younger male, only a tinge of regret as I saw how much he enjoyed himself just blabbering away all night, how much he just needed me to listen to what he had to say and I hadn’t. It had nothing to do with him meeting Kyuhyun and falling for him, it all came down to me being a bad boyfriend. All I can do now is appreciate our newly rekindled friendship and learn from the experience, learn to be a better, more attentive boyfriend so that next time I fall in love I’ll be loved back fully, I’ll make sure to make him happy so that he won’t leave my side to chase for happiness elsewhere.

As Sungmin and I lay in each others arms all night, sleeping peacefully, my heart felt at ease, no sadness, no anger, just relief, like the world had been lifted of my shoulders, a new me ready for a new beginning, a new love story with a happy ending this time…

and I already have someone in mind.