Cont.

*

Since Eunji was already there, she decided to do something productive for Sung Jae and stayed for the rest of the day. So later on, the three of them were in the living room, Eunji helping Sung Jae to solve some math problems while Sung Gyu lied across the sofa, listening to music while he duly focused on his phone, smiling at his phone every once so often. Eunji, of course was observing him time to time, feeling something strange in her gut and apparently, the shock from the previous incident still hadn’t exactly worn off her mind. What was worse was that she had nothing to do about it.

After a while, when Eunji was busy assessing Sung Jae’s sums, Sung Gyu happened to ask Eunji if it was possible for her to stay late.

“Something came up at work all of a sudden” He said quite sternly as he sat back on the sofa seat. “I would be a bit late to return…so if it’s not a problem, can you stay in for a while?”

Eunji was looking up from the book at that time, and it was evident to her, Sung Gyu was lying. She played alone, nevertheless. She could easily find out where they were heading after all.

“Okay?” Eunji agreed with a nod. “I’ll tell Woohyun oppa to pick me up”

*

That evening, Sung Gyu was taking a shower again, (Yes, the Sung Gyu who never took showers in the weekend) and Sung Jae was in bed, having an evening nap and Eunji found it the perfect moment to snoop in his phone once again.

At that point, Eunji was certain that Sung Gyu was heading to a date. She didn’t think that one would spend hours, trying to get ready and trying to choose what shirt went best with which tie to go to work and just a moment ago Sung Gyu was doing just that, mumbling all by himself. (Which she happened to witness when she was passing by, and no, she wasn’t peeking in or anything) Eunji felt kind of upset, letting all of this to happen while she could have stopped it, knowing the consequences herself, but she just couldn’t bring herself to. She just couldn’t break such terrible news to her boss by herself.

After she had tiptoed into the room once again, she located the phone in the same spot and also a piece of paper lying next to it. She was glad that she didn’t have to scroll through the messages once again since on the paper was written the place he was heading off to. It was a fancy restaurant, the kind of a place that only people with an excess of money to spend would go to, and those who were having romantic dates. Eunji easily figured that it had been Sung Gyu who had asked the person out, and felt terrible even more. Either way she quickly snapped a photo of the paper and slipped out of the room, running back into the kitchen in record speed.

*

Sung Gyu was feeling nervous than ever when he finally got into his suit. It had been months since he last went on a proper dinner date, and years since he last asked someone out. The last time ended up very poorly. Sung Jae had been five years old at that time and he had left him with his parents; and while he was at a rather fruitful date (Where he’d have kissed and maybe even booked a room and stuff) his parents happened to barge into the restaurant after Sung Jae had thrown some sort of a ruckus, and the woman found out that he had a child, well, the rest was history. Sung Gyu hadn’t gone on a fancy dinner date since.

Sung Jae was older now, and he was sure Eunji would take good care of him while he was away so it didn’t come to him as much a problem. What he was worried about was the fact that he’d been feeling dubious ever since he actually jumped n and asked the secret admirer out on a date. He felt something for her. He wouldn’t call it love, but something, like mutual attraction, and he felt like it would go on a long way if they’d meet. He hadn’t heard her voice yet, but he could imagine her driveling the words she had told him on her messages. He hadn’t seen her face, but she was beautiful, he could tell, because her words were, and she had kept him in company through the difficult times, and that was enough. What he was dubious about now, was all of these. The fact that they hadn’t seen each other and the fact that he hadn’t heard him. He was afraid to end up disappointed. He was afraid if he would be able to hold himself together if he end up getting disappointed per chance.

He looked up himself one last time over the mirror, unsure still, if he was okay the way he looked. He was in a navy blue jacket and dark pants with a crisp white shirt underneath, matched with a skinny blue tie. His hair was done in an upward turve and he even tried a slight touch up around his tiny eyes. More than anything, Sung Gyu was afraid to end up looking like a disappointment himself. So once he decided that he was up to the night, he stepped out the room and into the hallway where Eunji was just passing by while carrying a heap up left over wrappers and garbage from the living room.

She stopped right on her track and gave him a smile which looked kind of pretty when it reached her eyes. “You going boss?”

“Uh, yeah…miss Jung” Sung Gyu said, trying to return her smile. “Will you be fine?”

“Oh yes!” She said with a grin. “I’ll just clean up the house and stuff…you have fun, boss”

“Sure” Sung Gyu replied, letting out a hearty chuckle. “Lock the doors and stay safe”

*

When the time neared seven in the evening, which was the exact time of the date according to what the paper said, Eunji was growing impatient. At that point she was already imagining what the two in the date could be doing; whether Sung Gyu was still suffering the initial shock of the surprise or whether he was actually considering changing his gender preferences or something like that. It was mentally frustrating, and she wanted nothing but be there for him. Once she couldn’t take it anymore then, Eunji simply trudged her way into the living room where Sung Jae was busy playing Warcraft on his gaming set on the TV and shook his shoulder rather vigorously.

“Not now” Sung Jae said, sounding all too grownup, still focusing on his game. “I am busy”

“Ah, Sung Jae-yah!!!” Eunji bellowed in irritation. “This is a matter about-about…your future! We’ve got to do this!”

Sung Jae wasn’t so much as listening to his baby sitter’s relentless whining. He had much bigger fish to fry, what with all the evil gunmen in the game he was playing, and he really needed to beat the last high score. (Although the last high score was his, since his appa was a terrible gamer)

Eunji groaned loudly while stomping hither and tither across the living room. The curiosity was ripping her head apart, and at this rate, she was going to collapse. She just had to feed her disorientating mind, she just had to put it to a rest, and in order to do that, Eunji just had to be there. It was the only way.

After coming into a final resolve, Eunji took up the risk of making drastic measures and walked back into the living room, this time, with a hooded coat and a winter jacket for Sung Jae while her own put on herself.  “Kim Sung Jae” She announced rather gravely. “We are going out”

Sung Jae wasn’t listening so she tried again. “Kim Sung Jae! We are going out!”

“I don’t want to. It’s cold” Sung Jae replied halfheartedly, his hand moving along the figures on the TV screen.

“But we have to! I’ll buy Ice cream for you”

This time, Sung Jae actually paused the game and looked over at the baby sitter over his shoulder. “Not ice cream”

“Okay fine!” Eunji yelled, rolling her eyes dramatically. “I’ll by whatever”

“Okay, deal” Sung Jae said, closed the gaming application and slid down the sofa seat. “Let’s go”

*

The restaurant Sung Gyu chose to go on their first date was the very place that he asked his previous girlfriend out on an alumni meeting of their high-school. When he entered the place almost nine years later, the memories were still fresh; the moment he asked her, the moment she smiled and the moment they kissed; it was almost like yesterday and it was still quite hard to believe that what which started there on that night had actually ended up with giving him the most important possession in his life. It was this reason that he actually fancied the same restaurant very much, though it could actually empty his pockets just by a dinner for two. And if anything, Sung Gyu was secretly hoping that this too, the date he was finally going on after years of running away from all the painful memories would end up giving something more.

This thought did actually make him feel more confident, his previous doubts slowly diminishing along the time. It wasn’t like he was actually expecting something big; Sung Gyu just wanted to meet someone to spend his time with and share his worries when the going got incredibly hard. It was strange that he was feeling this so sure of himself, but Sung Gyu just wasn’t going to back away, he was taking chances because what could start small might as well end up becoming something bigger and important. Sung Jae was his biggest asset which came to him in just the same way, so he’d take this opportunity any day.

He headed off to the reception to check in with the booked table he previously did for two.

“Name, sir?” The pleasant young woman in a crisp white uniform asked with a smile.

“Kim Sung Gyu” Sung Gyu replied, offering her a charming one of his own. “Uh, I booked for a table by the window?”

“Yes, that has been set” The lady replied, consulting the brightly flickering computer screen. “It’s table fifteen sir”

Sung Gyu nodded, muttered her his gratitude and followed after the waiter to a neatly set table in a secluded corner facing a glass panel overlooking the busy street. The seat was still empty, also implying that it was either Sung Gyu was too early or she was getting late. Nevertheless, Sung Gyu heaved one deep sigh and made himself comfortable in his seat. It was a cold but a pleasant evening, the perfect ambiance for a first date in Sung Gyu’s opinion, and he was looking forward to it. The inside of the restaurant at that time, was well fitting too. There weren’t many couples that night, only a few huddled in their confines and spending time with their loved ones. Seeing them Sung Gyu could only smile to himself. He hadn’t been close to anyone in this way after he last was with Sung Jae’s mother; even if he was, there really weren’t any sentiments involved. This time, however, something was different. There was something about how his heart raised. The anticipation, the excitement and the contentment; these, he hadn’t felt these for years but now.

The Maître d’oer approached his table and asked what kind of whine he preferred for the night. He had previously asked her this question and she had replied that she’d go with anything as long as it would get her drunk and going, so he picked what seemed to him the affordable; and once the Maître was gone, he took another look at his watch. It was five minutes past seven already, and as though on cue, he began to get worried. Of course he had asked out a woman he barely knew. He didn’t even know her name. He only knew what her number was and where she came from, thus the worse thing he could really expect from the spontaneous date was being stood up. He stayed patiently, nevertheless, glancing at his wrist watch every once in a while. A few minutes later he was crouched down, his face in his hands and actually tired of waiting, just when the scraping of the chair being dragged along the wood sounded from before him. Sung Gyu immediately looked up, and was almost thrown off his feet.

What on earth is he doing here? Sung Gyu thought, straightening up and tried to give the other man a smile. “Uh…hello?”  Sung Gyu was being cordial, nevertheless, despite the fact that Sung Gyu actually really despised him.

“Hello” Yang Yeosob said with a smile, and he was sitting down there, in front of him, in the seat that Sung Gyu had reserved for his special girl. He was bewildered though he tried to not to let it show as he spoke.

“Um…you’ve gotten your seats wrong I suppose?” He said, a fake smile plastered on his face. “This is actually my place, I reserved it”

Yang Yeosob didn’t budge. He just sat there, staring at Sung Gyu in such a way that Sung Gyu began to feel self-conscious about himself. He was wanting for him to leave. Sung Gyu was on a date after having avoided it for years, and the last thing he wanted right now was for some barf-monger (In his opinion that is) who had apparently left a perfectly fine (if not for the odds) Jung Eunji for somebody else, to ruin it all for him. Kim Sung Gyu despised this man, though he had met him only once, and he just wanted him to move, and most possibly disappear from the face of the earth.

“Excuse me” Sung Gyu repeated, this time a bit sternly. “I had reserved this table so can you please-,”

“You reserved this table for me” Yeosob blurted out so suddenly that Sung Gyu abruptly stopped on his words, and then snorted out loud, rolling his eyes to the back of his head. “Are you ing kidding me? Get off, I’m on a date”

“Oh yes, you are” Yeosob said, now leaning across the table with a rather strange, somewhat seductive, -if it was to a woman- smile. “You’re on a date with me”

“What the actual ?” Sung Gyu bellowed, almost getting on his feet. “Go away! I have no business with you”

“But Sung Gyu-Ssi…” Yeosob mumbled, his smile gradually disappearing. “It’s the truth, you have to believe me”

“No I don’t!” Sung Gyu bellowed, frantic by the ridiculousness of this all. He was waiting for a date, he ain’t got time to deal with this kind of crap. He let out a long, frustrated sigh, looking straight at the strangely crestfallen man before him and tried to speak as calmly as possible. “Please, stop this nonsense and leave me alone, I have no time to deal with you right now”

Yeosob just sat there, staring at him a while longer and sat back, pulling out his phone. Then without a word, he dialed a number which he had saved quite a while ago, laid the apparatus on the table and looked up with a strange emotion etched on his eyes. A few seconds later, Sung gyu’s phone began to ring. In a panicked movement he fumbled in his pockets, trying to locate it in a haste. He only pulled it out to find that the secret admirer was calling him, after weeks of never really doing so. His heart beat raised in an instance, heat raising up his cheeks; in turn he was completely forgetting about the much hated man sitting on the seat designated for her and quickly picked up the phone. There was silence and without even Sung Gyu noticing it, Yeosob had picked up the phone on the other side. His voice echoed in a soft raspy breath, tingling in the thick coldness surrounding them, instantaneously crashing down Sung Gyu’s all hopes and dreams into fragments of complete, utter nothingness.

“It’s me….” He said, and slowly, Sung Gyu turned to his right, blood descending from his brain. “And I like you…Kim Sung Gyu. I just like you too much”

*

Eunji parked the car after driving through the routes which were surprisingly less crowded and came to a halt at exactly where Sung Gyu’s piece of paper said. There were a few expensive cars parked in the parking lot, and she could easily spot Sung Gyu’s set in  lonely corner by itself (Which was rather saddening, as per how she thought) so she parked hers right beside it, in hopes that Sung Gyu’s poor car won’t be feeling left out any more. She then turned to Sung Jae who was staring out the shutter so intensely and slowly shook him by his arm. “Kid, we’re here…”

“Are we going to eat here?” He asked rather skeptically. “It’s seems like you’ll need loads of money”

“No” Eunji said and let out a sigh, a white cloud forming with her breath. “We’re going to find your father…come on now”

“Really?” Sung Jae asked, already undoing his belt. “Why is he here? He went to work?”

“No Sung Jae. Come on now…” Eunji had already undone her belt and stepped out, standing on the asphalt in the excruciatingly cold autumn breeze. The place was rather pleasant, with the low chandeliers and fancy lamp posts on the side; if only it had been a real date…Eunji could only imagine the worst case scenarios and sighed. She should have stopped it while she could, because Yeosob was probably playing a prank; but she didn’t because she still wasn’t over him. It was quite a dilemma for her at that point. She could only decide when she had seen the scenario with her very eyes herself.

“You okay?” She asked, just as Sung Jae trotted over to her side. “Cold?”

“No. I’m okay” He said and gave her a nod.

“Okay” Eunji nodded back, then took his tiny hand before she made her way towards the entrance door.

*

“Please tell me this is a ing joke” Sung Gyu said, burying his face in both his hands. “Even if it was, this isn’t ing funny”

He was having a severe meltdown right now. Sung Gyu had the slightest thought that things could potentially end up going wrong for him, just as how they had for eight whole years, but never once in his life did he imagine it to be this so terrible and…humiliating. Sung Gyu hadn’t expected this heart break to be so…severe, but it was. And Sung Gyu at the moment wanted everything to go back to how they were.

It was impossible though, to accept it that the person he had felt so special about for the course of this brief time had actually ended up being a man. It was not just any man, it was Jung Eunji’s alleged boyfriend, and the man Sung Gyu had really despised.

“It isn’t…” Yeosob said, sounding genuinely abashed. “I’m being honest, Sung Gyu…hyung. I really, truly, honestly do like you…ever since I saw you that day-,”

“Don’t say it, I’m not your ing hyung” Sung Gyu hissed, feeling his anger boiling up in his veins. If not for the circumstances, he would have punched Yang Yeosob right on his sorry face.

“Sorry…” Yeosob mumbled, his eyes down casted in a sincerely despondent manner. “It must have come to you as a surprise…I should have-,”

“You’re apologizing after you pretended to be a woman for two weeks!” Sung Gyu almost yelled, garnering the attention of several others in the restaurant. “For two weeks! You’re so ing brazen”

“I never-!” Yeosob began and heaved a heavy breath. “I never told you I was a woman hyung…”

Sung Gyu sat up, pointing a quivering finger at the opposite direction. “You! You- what did you expect? That I’d magically figure out you were a man?”

“But you’re an investigator-,”

“Forget it!” Sung Gyu echoed, throwing his hands in the air and ed them into his dark locks. “Just…just tell me how you got my number…did Eunji give it to you? Or did you-?”

“You…you gave it to me…”

It was just getting ridiculous for him now. “What?”

Yeosob, on his part, however, didn’t really say a word. Instead he just dipped his hand into his pocket as Sung Gyu could only watch him with horror stricken eyes and slowly he pulled out a piece of rectangular card from his wallet. He then sluggishly slid it across the table towards him.

It was a business card, it was a business card of Kim Sung Gyu, the one that he left on the dressing table of the hotel room just because it was cordial to. But what was surprising was that he had only put on his office telephone number. How could he have found his personal line? Sung Gyu was just about to ask this when Yeosob himself reached across and flipped the card to the other side. Then there it was, Sung Gyu’s personal number, written down in his own hand writing, labeled as ‘My new number’. It didn’t take long for the truth to hit him. He had written it down to memorize it just around the time he changed into a new number. He used this card to refer to when he had to give his number to someone else; and by hook or by crook it had accidentally slipped into his normal set of business cards, finally ending up going into Yeosob’s hand.

“That’s your number right?” Yeosob said, and when Sung Gyu looked up, he wasn’t seeing just a man, he was seeing a man who was pleading, desperate and longing; much like himself. But it wasn’t the case entirely. Sung Gyu was desperate and longing, alright, but he wasn’t pleading for anybody while Yeosob certainly did.

“That’s…” he began and simply trailed away. Sung Gyu was broken, wrenched, disappointed and worn out. He simply couldn’t find strength to speak. The only thing he needed right now was comfort; Sung Jae’s comfortable warmth.

“Would you still deny? And please…I do really like you…”

Sung Gyu stared at Yeosob with anger inflicting his eyes. Anger, sorrow and disappointment. He had only gone on one full circle to end up here; much to Sung Gyu’s utter chagrin, nothing has really changed for him. He was still exactly where he began. He opened his mouth, trying to gather his thoughts to form a coherent answer, and just as he was about to give Yeosob his comeback, an eerily familiar voice suddenly erupted on his right.

“Yang Yeosob, there, I caught you!”

There she was, standing just a few feet away from where two sat, holding Sung Jae’s hand in hers and something strange inflicted in her eyes, something in-between rage and disbelief; there she was, Jung Eunji.

*

“You’re unbelievable” Eunji yelled, not surprised or not a least bit remorseful when she found her boyfriend, or, as she’d like to put it now, ‘Ex’boyfriend sitting together with a horror stricken Kim Sung Gyu. When she stepped into the place with an oblivious Sung Jae in her hand, Eunji was quite expecting for the things to have gone a bit far and for the damages to be beyond repair. Although she wasn’t sure what exactly Yeosob was getting at; whether it was revenge or whether he had other sort of intentions, Eunji couldn’t bear the fact that he had gotten her completely oblivious and innocent boss involved into it. She could have done something before all this could have escalated to a point of no return; hell, she could have talked! But she hadn’t, all for her ego and now, at this point, all she could do was confront them, at least now.

“You’re unbelievable, Yang Yeosob. What is this? Cheating on that bimbo with my boss? Are you that shameless?”

“Eunji that isn’t…” Yeosob began, not missing a beat. “This isn’t what you think it is…”

“Then what is it? Bastard!”

“Eunji” Sung Gyu muttered, now glancing at his little boy. Seeing him, Sung Gyu could feel his whole world falling back into place. The two weeks spent with a secret admirer had taken away all the valuable moments he could have spent with his dear little son, who would never end up hurting him no matter what the circumstances were, and right now he just wanted to take him in his arms and just leave. But he couldn’t, not after he had caused all this ruckus, not only on himself but also on Jung Eunji.

Eunji took a brief glance at her boss and turned back to Yeosob. “What is it? Tell me! Is this revenge? Because I embarrassed you at the wedding? Or is it-,”

“I broke up with her” Yeosob suddenly blurted out, successfully silencing Eunji mid-sentence. “I broke up with her after I found someone…” He turned to Sung Gyu at this point and gave an apologetic, crestfallen smile. “…Someone who kept me alive…”

“You can’t be bloody serious!?!” Eunji suddenly bellowed frantically. “Leave him alone for-for ’s sake! He wouldn’t like you! He might be all y and totally likable; but that gives you no right to-!!”

“Why doesn’t it?” Yeosob echoed, completely forsaken by now. “I like him, I really really do…I just don’t understand-,”

“Because I never ended it with you, goddamn it!” Eunji yelled outrageously. And then, it was like an epiphany, the epiphany, the moment of enlightenment that she had been waiting for. At that moment when she met eyes with the man she thought she loved, she didn’t see him anymore. There wasn’t the attraction, the spark, the adoration. There wasn’t the wonderful pull which she thought had always had her bounded to him. There was nothing, nothing but the hatred and the thought of the fact that she had always kept her heart open for a lying, too-faced , in her definition, bastard. And she hated it.

“But you know what, Yeosob?” She said, giving him one cruel smile. “I’m breaking up with you…we’re over now”

“We’ve been over for a long time Eunji” Yeosob said, now actually offering her a horrendous smile. “I’m glad you realize it now”

All through this, Sung Gyu realized, Sung Jae was having a hard time trying to cope with things. He wasn’t very familiar with adults’ things, and an argument of the like was definitely something he hadn’t experienced before, all for the fact that Sung Gyu had made it sure that his little boy wouldn’t experience the cruel, harsh world of the grown-ups until it was the right time to. His real mother had visited him, once, a few years ago when he was only a child. Sung Gyu and her had argued a lot, sending her off in tears; but Sung Gyu made it sure that Sung Jae didn’t see or hear a single sight of it, which he didn’t; and this what Sung Gyu had caused owing to his own ambiguity; he didn’t want his innocent little child to play a part of it.

“Enough” He managed to croak out after he finally ripped his gaze off from his child. Sung Gyu was just silently sitting there the whole time, arms folded on the mahogany table, head laid in them and eyes set on worriedly standing Kim Sung Jae. He wanted to do nothing but carry the boy in his arms and sooth him at that time; but Sung Gyu was no better. He was broken and he needed soothing of his own.

He voicing out after moments of silence finally managed to halt their argument, and at this point, Sung Jae stared at his father for a long while and slowly tugged at his baby sitter’s hand. “Baby sitter…”

“Oh…Sung Jae-ah.” She murmured, finding his confused gaze. She then turned to her boss, trying to find the right words to respond with. He beat her for it though, voicing out in a sullen, low voice; “Let’s just go home…”

*

Later on that night after the heart-wrenching incident, Sung Gyu, Eunji and Sung Jae walked out into the cold autumn ambiance of the parking lot. The cars which were there when Eunji came around were still standing on the very same spots they were before; so were the cars of themselves; and Eunji realized, they were the only two cars which were standing together in the lot. They were the only two who had come in two different cars. This thought came as overwhelming to her for some reason. She’d been observing her boss ever since the incident happened just a few minutes ago. She watched how his face remained disdained, how his shoulders were slumped and eyes seemed to be unfocused and maybe even smaller than they usually were. The clothes he wore suddenly seemed like they weren’t his, the mighty proud Sung Gyu was there no more. In a nutshell, Sung Gyu that night wasn’t Sung Gyu for her but somebody else. Eunji just needed her boss back. But only, she didn’t know how to.

The moment they reached their cars, Sung Gyu suddenly stopped and was in a standstill. He was staring at the cars, at how they were parked together and thought of how they were never meant to be so. Then it occurred to him, what he’d missed at that point.

Eunji had known where to come. He never told her, but she knew.

“Miss Jung” He began, his back still turned to both his son and her. “How did you know where I was?”

Eunji knew that this was coming, thus she wasn’t a least bit surprised. She glanced down at the little boy, who had silenced and was sadly watching his father throughout and heaved a sigh. “I checked your phone…”

Sung Gyu sighed too, and only said; “I see…”

Eunji knew that this was going on the wrong routes. This conversation wasn’t supposed to go on this way. He could yell at her, fire her, something! But he was just standing there without a word.

“I knew this was going to end poorly!” She quickly blurted out before she could stop herself. “I could have stopped you…but I couldn’t…I’m sorry…boss”

“How?” Sung Gyu asked, and for her, it wasn’t just a question…it was more like a single worded statement, an accusation. Eunji took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “I know his number…I can say it’s him right away….” Then she fluttered them open. “I don’t know what happened, and I wouldn’t ask…but I’m sorry…”

“So you…you knew…”

Eunji bit her lip and nodded slowly at herself. “I knew…”

There was silence then; the kind of regretful, repentant silence that comes right after something terrible happened. This was the silence which came around when Sung Gyu accused Sung Jae’s mother of leaving them, when Eunji was told that she was fired from the Yang’s day care Centre and when it got announced that someone was dead; the kind of silence that everyone would despise.

Then Sung Gyu muttered in a low voice; “Just go home, Miss Jung…”

Not that he hated her, not that he’d fire her but only to go home…

Eunji nodded, nodded and nodded, apologizing under her breath, and then when she was just about to pull her hand away from Sung Jae, he gripped hers hard. She glanced down their intertwined fingers, the reddened tips; Sung Jae had his father’s hands, and one was tightly closed around hers. She was just about to protest, thinking that he was actually going to ask about what she promised earlier that evening before they came over; but when she met his eyes, she knew, Sung Jae just needed some time off. He was a child after all, and he was never made for adults’ issues. His little mind had a limit to tolerate, and this was it. Eunji bit her lip and watched him for a moment until the child voiced out; “I’m hungry…”

There was a moment of silence and Sung Gyu finally turned around.

“Sung Jae, this isn’t the time-“

“It’s okay” Eunji cut in and forced out a regretful smile. “Go home…boss, I’ll take care of Sung Jae…”

Sung Gyu looked up, meeting her eyes for the first time. “Miss Jung-,”

“We’ll be fine…don’t worry boss” She whispered, and before she could stop herself, her hand reached over and squeezed his arm through his jacket in a soothingly soft manner in reassurance. “Go home first and take a good rest”

Sung Gyu glanced down at his arm, at where he was touched and finally managed a nod. “Alright” He muttered under his breath. “Take good care of him…drive safe…”

Eunji nodded and this time gave him one of her genuine smiles, one that reached her eyes. “I will…you take care yourself…”

Sung Gyu nodded back and then they headed to their respective cars before finally heading out of the parking lot, driving out on different directions into the serpentine routes of the Seoul city.

*

When Eunji finally returned to the Kim’s that night, it was almost midnight and Sung Jae was sound asleep in her arms as she carried him up the lift. They had gone to a quiet little dinner place just around the corner of their apartment plaza, and had bought Sung Jae whatever he needed to have. Sung Jae didn’t eat much though, and Eunji had fed him until she could tell he had had enough. He was silent throughout, and when they had almost finished their dinner, he asked her;

“What happened to appa?”

Eunji had to think carefully to answer that. Sung Jae was still young, and his father wouldn’t want him to know more than he necessarily should. Anything bad she’d say might lead to something even worse, and she knew that Sung Gyu trusted her, so she wanted to keep that and stay on the safe side. So she said; “Appa is really lonely, Sung Jae…he’s upset because his…friend lied to him…”

“Appa is lonely?” Sung Jae echoed, worry inflicted in his eyes. “But he has me, we spend so much time together…”

“But you’re still very young, Sung Jae” Eunji said, staring at the broth in her stew. “Appa needs to speak to adults when he has problems that he can’t tell you…do you understand? Like you don’t have an Omma, he doesn’t have a wife…people get married so they can talk to their wives about their problems Sung Jae, and appa can’t do that, so he’s lonely…”

“Hm…” Sung Jae nodded and stared down at his rice cakes, twirling them around with his chopsticks. He was contemplating what she just said, Eunji could tell, but she wasn’t expecting him to make a smart remark, which he did, almost throwing her off the seat.

“But he has you…I don’t have an Omma, but I have a baby sitter. You’re an adult too, so appa can talk to you, can’t he?”

Eunji stared at the child incredulously, thinking that he was actually pointing out that they should get married or something along that line; she was all about to respond when Sung Jae said; “You don’t have to be my Omma to take care of me, so you don’t have to be appa’s wife to talk to him too…I think you’re my friend, so you can be appa’s friend too…”

Eunji pondered this for a while, and she smiled, her hands slowly rubbing the top of the child’s head. “Hmm…I think you’re right…I think your appa and I can be friends…”

So that night when she returned to the Kims’, she came with a new resolve gripped in her hands. Sung Jae was right, no matter how young he was and how naïve his little mind could be (when he’s in his Dalai-lama form, Sung Jae’s words could do miracles) and just like he said, if talking to him was least of what Eunji could do for her boss (Free of charge, that is) Eunji would do it any day. Despite him being quite boring and naggy, Sung Gyu was a person with a good heart. She had seen how he was with Sung Jae and even with his parents, how much they loved him and how much love he could give for the others. In Eunji’s opinion, Sung Gyu deserved love as much as he gives. She couldn’t of course grant him that, but there was one thing she could grant for him, and that was an ear which listens and a shoulder to lean on when he’s in need.

When Eunji stepped into the hallway, all the lights in the house were dimmed and the sound of the television could be heard from the direction of the living room. She could see Sung gyu’s shoes taken off in a haste, like he’d been in a hurry to garner his relaxation. Eunji pursed her lips and sighed, her eyes turning back to Sung Jae’s sleeping face. He was adorable, even more so when he’s deep in sleep. Eunji couldn’t help it when her heart constricted at the sight. For Eunji, as a child grown up without a mother, Sung Jae had grown up so well. He was intelligent, and he listened and understood very well. Eunji had had her handful of experience with kids of all ages, and Sung Jae was one very special child she had met never before.

Holding the boy against her chest, Eunji trotted over to Sung Jae’s bedroom. Sung Gyu’s condo was a single floored house, which was a great convenience too. There were just two three steps which led into Sung Jae’s bedroom which she had cleaned up the day before that. She slowly made her way through towards his bed and gently placed the child among the covers. She then proceeded to undo his shoes and the excess of clothes, slipped him into his pajamas and covered him with his duet. All through this, Sung Jae slept so soundly that it almost made her cry. If only the boy had a mother to do this all for him…

“You’re a good boy, kid” Eunji whispered, running her fingers through his soft hair and before she could stop herself, placed a chaste kiss on his crown. “You grow up and be a good guy, okay?”

Sung Jae didn’t reply of course, Eunji just smiled and left the room in tip toes, afraid she would wake the boy up if she made any sounds. Engrossed deeply in her tip toeing, Eunji didn’t even notice it when her boss traversed the hallway with a can of beer in his hand that just as she turned, she ran into him, causing them both to stumble and fall against a wall.

“Oh my god” She whispered, quickly straightening up. Sung Gyu had been so distracted by his can and certainly other things too that he seemed quite dazed, still leaning his back against the wall. His eyes were staring right through hers, like he was looking into her soul, making her feel slightly self-conscious; soon after, though, he quickly brushed off his stupor and cleared his throat.

“Oh…sorry…”

“No that’s…fine” Eunji muttered, stepping away from him. After running into him so suddenly and momentarily being engulfed by his soft warmth, Eunji had lost all her good reasons and plans. She forgot that she had actually planned to talk to Sung Gyu about things and maybe make friend with him like Sung Jae had wanted her too, but the look in his eyes was distracting her; so did the pastel pink dust on his cheeks and how appealing he seemed to her in his disoriented suit. Eunji wanted nothing but to escape at that time because she felt as though she couldn’t hold herself in. She was planning to, if not for the call she received just at the very moment. It was Woohyun.

“Hey Ji, I’m coming over” he said breathlessly on the other end. “I just got into the tube…might take a while…can you stay for a moment?”

Eunji watched him as her boss sluggishly made it back into the living room where the television was still on and heaved a sigh. Eunji could have just driven herself back to Ansan, but her sister didn’t allow her to since the accident which happened a few years ago which almost took her life. She had been ordered to stay in since in case she was getting late until either one of her family members would come to pick her up. Although she didn’t entirely like it, Eunji was always left with no choice.

“Okay, fine” she said into the phone. “Come safely okay?”

“You too, stay safe” Woohyun said, and the line went dead.

After she had finished her phone call, Sung Gyu called out from his place in the living room. “Is Woohyun on his way, Miss Jung?”

She was still slightly disoriented by what just happened, yet she answered, nevertheless, while making it into the living room. “Oh…he’s in the tube right now…”

“Okay…” Sung Gyu muttered, his back turned to her while he switched through the channels. “Make yourself at home until he comes”

“Yeah…” Eunji muttered, almost in a whisper while she stood rigid behind the sofa. This was her time, she knew where she should pull herself together and really speak to him. She could see that Sung Gyu wasn’t exactly relaxed. He was still shaming himself by the fact that he had let himself be cheated by the stranger on the phone for all she cared, and she didn’t very much like it. It was difficult though, for she was still very much attracted to his physique. But when he turned around and met her eyes, she couldn’t help but gulp down all unnecessary thoughts and be composed. “Uh…is everything okay?” Sung Gyu asked, getting back to his professional ways. It was making her feel bewildered even more. She stared at him for a moment and took a deep breath. “Boss…can we talk?”

Sung Gyu stared at her for a while, just thinking, and finally nodded. “Yeah…okay?”

He scooted to a side on the sofa seat and Eunji slid in next to him. The place was again backed with stray covers and empty beer cans strewn about along with his jacket and the tie. Eunji made a mental note to clean things up and proceeded to speak. “I took Sung Jae out for dinner just before…and he was telling me things”

“Mmhm” Sung Gyu nodded, reached out and lowered the volume of the TV. “What did he say?”

“He was asking me about you…”

“Ok” Sung Gyu nodded and stared at his clenched hands, abashed. “What did…he ask?”

“About…today…”

There was silence then, and it was so still around them that Eunji could swear she hears the clocks tick. This went on for a while until Sung Gyu drew in a soundly sharp breath before turning to her. “Eunji, about today…I’m sorry-I-I…”

“No I am” Eunji said, shaking her head regretfully. “I am the one who dragged you into it…I don’t know how it happened but…I know that it’s my fault”

“It isn’t” Sung Gyu said and leaned back into the sofa seat. “Eunji…I just…somethings happened, and I guess I just wanted some release. He…he must have had good intentions on his part…I can’t blame him after all…I should have been more intent. It’s my fault” He turned to her and met her eyes with his. “You’re not at all at fault”

Eunji nodded, unable to argue even more and bit her lips. She was just thinking, how she should approach it and what she needed to say. The previous bewildering thoughts had now passed long and she only had good intentions of talking to him and being a shoulder to him. Eunji was straightforward and what you’d call, brave. So when she went on and asked as though it was the most natural thing to ask, Eunji didn’t think twice.

“Boss…were you in love with Yeo-I mean…the person on the phone?”

There was silence and Sung Gyu chuckled lightly, his eyes closed all the while. “Hmm…Love? No…I wouldn’t put it exactly like that….but I’d say…I felt something…” He heaved a long sigh then and finally opened his eyes. “I don’t know Miss Jung. It’s been a long time for me”

“I just think you need a companion” Eunji said and casually propped her feet on the table before them. “You know, a good friend, someone to talk to. You don’t necessarily need a…girlfriend or anyone for that, you can have a best friend? Someone to rely on and relay all your problems on…that is what I was thinking. Sung Jae too. That was what he was telling me”

“He did?” Sung Gyu asked, smiling for real for the first time since that evening and leaned forward to sip from his can. He tilted his head to a side thoughtfully while twirling the content in can in his hand. “A companion you say?”

“Yup” Eunji nodded and began to count off on her fingers. “You see, boss; you can talk to them whenever you want to, and they are willing to stay with you too. They don’t leave you after they’ve gotten what they need; and ah! They can sit and drink with you!” She dropped her hand and leaned forward, putting down her feet. “There are million good things that come from best friends, boss. You don’t necessarily need to be in love and stuff…you can have all the cliché put aside and just have fun!”

Sung Gyu laughed, this time genuinely contented by Eunji’s words and placed the can on the coffee table. “You make it sound so easy! Like you can buy off a best friend from a store or something”

“Well you can’t” Eunji said matter of factly and put her hands together on her lap. “But you can make them….You just always think that you are alone and keep things to yourself. Why don’t you talk to someone and put your mind to a rest? There are many people around you. There are your parents, there are people from the station…and there’s me. I don’t know the others but I’m sure I will be here listening to all your worries…”

There was silence again, and Eunji was wondering if she had said too much. She slowly turned to her side, sneaking a glance at her boss. What she happened to find was him pursing his lips, hard, his hands fidgeting with one another. “It’s…nice to hear all that…but if you do realize, Miss Jung. I am a father with a child. I never asked to be one, but I am one and I’m someone people really don’t like to hang out with. You know…things are much complicated than they seem. So I don’t want to worry anyone with my own problems. I just end up becoming a burden to them…”

Eunji just watched him, silent and strained, then finally she said to him; “I don’t know about the others…but I am not one of them. I take care of Sung Jae. I share that burden with you to some extent, and I hate to admit but I do quite enjoy it. So even if all would reject you, I never would. I would listen to you. I’m a pretty good listener too…I listen to Eun-Mi and the Nam’s all the time. So you can totally tell me anything”

“So you’re offering to be my best friend?” Sung Gyu asked, without a beat, and picked up his can of beer once more. “Is that what you’re getting at?”

“I can be your best friend or councilor or anyone you want me to be…I don’t mind, I just want to do it”

“Why?” Sung Gyu wanted to know. “Why would you want to be my best friend now?”

The answer had never been so simpler. She looked up at him, offered her one of her warmest smiles and replied. “Because Sung Jae wants me to”

Sung Gyu slowly turned to her, wary of her reaction and intentions. But he didn’t have to be dubious anymore. Eunji’s smile was genuine, he could tell that much. And if these were the nutshell of the things she had talked about with Sung Jae, he’d really take it any day. “Okay…” Sung Gyu said and smiled. “Okay…”

“Then…” Eunji said and verily got up on her feet. “Can I give you a head massage?”

“A what?” Sung Gyu echoed incredulously and almost got up on his feet. “No!”

Eunji just shrugged and got behind him behind the sofa before clutching his shoulders and pulling him back. “Ayee…best friends give head massages okay? And that’s the thing you need right now”

“But I’m not-!” Sung Gyu started pulling away from her. “You shouldn’t! It’s highly irrelevant and unnecessary!”

“Just keep your technicalities for yourself, boss” Eunji said and pulled him back to lean against the seat. “This isn’t work! We’re being best friends!”

“But Eunji-!” Sung Gyu started again, but then railed off the moment her fingers slipped through his hair onto his scalp. Sung Gyu hair was soft to the tuck like baby’s silk and unlike what she thought, wasn’t greasy at all. It easily tangled between her fingers, softly lapping into her grip. Sung Jae had his father’s hair, she could tell by the familiarity of its texture, and Eunji liked it. She pressed her fingers on and on onto his scalp, the tips slightly calloused on his skin; and she could feel him relax under her gentle touch, his breathing slow and his movements still. And soon it was the most relaxed Sung Gyu had ever been in Eunji’s eyes. His eyes fluttered close momentarily, and she had to take a strong grip on herself to not to stare at the sheer beauty of it. He was a sculpture of marble, and the most beautiful she had ever seen him.

After a moment, Sung Gyu smiled and voiced out, his hands relaxing on his chest; “Ah…it feels nice”

“It is…isn’t it?” Eunji said, and pressed her index fingers on his temples. “I am so good at this”

Sung Gyu laughed, still relaxed under him, and after a moment he quickly pulled away. “Ah, by the way…was Yeo-I mean, your boyfriend, was he serious?”

“Ex-boyfriend” Eunji corrected with a frown. “I don’t know…I think we just never was an item from the beginning. We didn’t know each other enough. He may have been…you know…biual. I never really knew”

“Hmm…Sung Gyu fluttered his eyes closed once more. “He tricked me all right. Ah, and one more thing” Sung Gyu pulled away again and turned around to face her. “Just then…you said that I were…y? Do you really think so?”

Eunji froze, her hands still in the air. Of course Eunji thought he was y. It wasn’t only that she thought; Kim Sung Gyu seriously was and it wasn’t something that he just need to think. It was like the truest thing of all the true things in the world. She didn’t admit that though. Instead she just pulled him back with the cloth of his shirt and started to aggressively massage his scalp. Sung Gyu was laughing then, definitely more relaxed and gradually getting over his worries. “It’s okay if you think so, though…” He said, more like to himself. “I won’t blame you…”

“Tsh! So conceited!”

Sung Gyu laughed harder, closed his eyes and hummed as he reclined into the moment with a sigh. For him, Eunji definitely was a keep. He wasn’t sure of what he was feeling at that time. But he was certain that it wasn’t something which would change anytime sooner. Eunji was someone who deserved to be liked. She pulled him out and held him up when she was slowly falling into an abyss of sheer nothingness; and he was simply so thankful for her. Sung Jae definitely was in good hands.

The next morning, Sung Gyu woke up with a start, only to find Sung Jae curled up in the bed beside him. It wasn’t a terribly cold night either, and Sung Gyu couldn’t really remember if he had carried him into his room the previous night. He had come to bed just after Eunji had left with Woohyun without so much as taking a shower (He had had too many showers for a day) and that was all he remembered. Sung Jae had crawled into bed with him, that was the only explanation he could come up with; and the very thought almost brought tears to his eyes. Eunji was right. He didn’t need to have a girlfriend to be loved. He just only had to take notice of the people around him who really loved him and needed him by his side, and Sung Jae was definitely the one person who loved him the most.

He smiled to himself, leaned down and crept his hands around her, holding him close against his chest. He was warm, and it certainly was the warmth Sung Gyu needed to wake up to, every day. Sung Gyu just loved his son beyond words.

It was at this moment that Sung Gyu saw the folder paper on his night stand. It was crumpled on the corners, and he could trace the outline of vigorously written words inside it. He reached over with one hand under Sung Jae’s head, and with great difficulty, he unfolded it and couldn’t stop it when tears almost creeped down his eyes.

It was from Sung Jae alright, and written in it was the best thing that someone has ever told him in his life.

‘Appa,
 I love you loads. Don’t feel lonely. I will grow up soon so we can be adults together and you can tell me your things too.

Loads of love,
Sung Jae.

Sorry that its too long, and too angsty. I will make it up to you all, I swear!

The next one will not be too long or too angsty. Thank you for reading!