His voice was smooth, flowing into Hae-sol’s ears as he listened intently to the lyrics of Jonghyuns song, his foot tapping along with the rhythm. The song ends and Jonghyun hangs loosely onto the mic stand, his silver bangs covering his eyes. “That was excellent.” Hae-sol rises up, lowering the volume as the song repeated. “I think you’ve got your final product.” Jonghyun looks up, his eyes bright and slowly a smile spreads across his lips. “Really?” Hae-sol nods and peers into Jonghyuns eyes. “Is something wrong?” He asks and Jonghyun blinks, standing up straight and forcing a wider smile onto his face. “I guess you could say so…” Hae-sol crosses his arms over his chest and stares Jonghyun down. “I’m not just your music teacher, you can talk to me about things that are on your mind.” Jonghyun turns away, reaching down and gathering his music sheets. “It’s just...me and Kibum are taking a break from each other.” The news came to a sort of shock to Hae-sol because he saw Jonghyun a few weeks ago--eyes sparkling at the picture on his phone--now those two had broken things off? It came as a shock but he understood that relationships took time and some took breaks, some forever and some just for a moment’s time. “I’m pretty sure when the time comes you’ll let him hear the song you wrote for him.” Jonghyun looks up, catching Hae-sol’s eyes with a grin. “Of course, that song took me months to write the lyrics and to compose the melody.” Jonghyun opens the door. “Bummies gonna hear it one way or another.” Hae-sol smiles, waving slightly as the door clicked shut behind Jonghyun. 

Jonghyun leans against the door, his arms hanging loosely at his sides. It had been about 7 weeks, Jonghyun was beginning to lose count, maybe that was a good thing. He missed Kibum more than anything right now, he needed to hold him. But that’s where his problem came; he needs Kibum. I have to learn how not to need him, I have to learn how to just love him. His head drops and a sigh escapes him. He inhales, exhaling slowly and looking up, the halls were empty and there was no Kibum waiting for him once he reached his car. An empty sidewalk was a sight he slowly started getting use to. “My hands are cold…” He muttered a few days after breaking away from Kibum. And now even though his hands were empty, that weren’t cold and his mind felt some what clearer. He opens the car door, sliding into the drivers seat and closing the door behind him. He sat in the car for a moment and closed his eyes. He takes a deep breath, clenching the arm rest and using his other hand to toss his music sheets into the backseat. “Haaah…” He lets out a long breath, running a hand over his face and swallowing. He clears his throat before singing quietly the song he had written for Kibum. A minute or so into the song his phone rings with a message from Minho. It read: You’ve been avoiding me. I’m waiting at your house, lets talk.

Jonghyun curse at his phone. “Why are you such a goddamned good friend…” He grumbles because Jonghyun knew that Minho understood him just a little too well and that the young athlete was probably informed by Kibum on what had happened. He had managed to avoid Minho for almost 7 weeks. “Well,” He turns the key and the car rumbles to life. “I guess it’s time to face cupid.”

Minho sits on the couch in Jonghyuns house, his legs crossed respectfully as Jonghyuns mother sat across from him in a small chair. “It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you, Minho.”

“It has.” He smiles warmly and she smiles gently back at him. A few minutes later the door jingled open and Jonghyun stood, his eyes flicking between the two. He bowed as his mother stood. “Eomma.”

“How’s your music coming along?” She asks taking the sheets of paper that were dangling from his hands. “It’s going well.” He bends down, placing a light kiss to her cheek and closing the door shut with his foot. “Is aeboji home yet?” She shakes her head. “He’s working late today.” Jonghyun nods, looking over her shoulder and meeting eyes with Minho. “Eomma….” he starts slowly and his mother smiles with understanding. “I’ll let you two alone to talk things out.” Jonghyun bows. “Thank you.” He hugs her tightly, moving swiftly to Minho. They both wait for her to disappear into her room before they start speaking. “How’s Kibum?” 

“Why don’t you ask him yourself?” Minho snaps back and Jonghyun sinks into his chair, letting out a breath. “I can’t, Minho.”

“Why can’t you? Kibum explained to me what happened and I get you Jonghyun, I get you one-hundred percent.” Jonghyun stares into Minhos eyes, clutching his hands together. “But what happens when you get back together with him? Is your suffocation and possession going to start all over again?” There were the daggers, the knives of truth stabbing Jonghyun where it would hurt. “I understand why you need a break away from him, but how long is this break going to last?” Minhos eyes looked sympathetic and saddened. “Don’t make Kibum wait forever Jonghyun, break it off if--”

“What about me?” Minho blinks and Jonghyun looks down at the ground as he continues on. “If I end things, completely end it with Kibum, I’ll be waiting all my life to find someone like him again and I know that noone else like Kibum exists.” Minho peers at him as he talks. “Have you ever thought that maybe I’m kicking myself in the right now thinking that what if he finds someone else? What if he goes to you, Minho? Because you’re not a bad guy….” Minhos eyes widen and Jonghyun grips his hair tightly. “I needed this break because Kibum was becoming everything to me. If I didn’t have my hands or my feet, he was there. If I didn’t have my eyes or my lungs to breathe, he was there. That was enough for me.” Minho listens intently, his heart aching for his friend. “Kibum was there, he existed and that’s all I needed.” He pauses, taking a deep breath and swallowing. “But….I have to learn to not put such weight on him. I have to love him without needing him 24/7.” Jonghyun looks up, locking eyes with Minho and adding on. “I’m not trying to make him wait--hell no--I want to be with him as soon as possible. But these past weeks have not been as horrible as I thought they would….” He trails off and Minho smiles softly. “I miss him, but I don’t know….I just…”

“Both of you aren’t suffocating because of the unsaid feelings you put on each other.” Jonghyun tilts his head curiously and Minho continues. “You felt vulnerable, but Kibum felt uneasy because you couldn’t have forgotten that you were once a player.” Jonghyun chuckles faintly, glancing down at his feet. “Yeah, I remember…”

“So you must understand that this break away from one another is showing that you both are serious about each other and that if you return you’ll have to learn how to not drown in your feelings, but this time together.” Jonghyun was quiet, soaking in Minho’s words and nodding his head. “You’re not such a bad frog-face after all.”

“Ugh, thanks, I guess.” Jonghyun laughs. “I’m saying thank you, Minho.” Jonghyun stares into his eyes and Minho felt his chest tighten because those two brown orbs saw into him. I know you liked Kibum before I did. I’m sorry and thank you. “Well!” Jonghyun jumps up from his seat and Minho’s gaze follows him as he rises up. “Wanna stay over? I don’t think eomma would mind if you ate with us.” Jonghyun grins crookedly, extending his hand towards Minho. The brunette was still staring at him, his eyes wide, mouth slightly ajar. “I swore you were an idiot.” He mutters and Jonghyun shrugs. “Looks can be deceiving.” He winks and Minho stares at him for a few seconds before taking his hand. 

“You said you wanted to talk to us?” Jonghyuns father asks and he nods. It had been two days since his talk with Minho and now he had to discuss certain things with his parents...mainly his father. “Yes.” He bows his head slightly before looking up to meet his fathers eyes. “I wanted to talk about Kibum…” Jonghyun could see the glint that was now cast in his fathers eyes and the discomfort shown on his expression. “We’re...taking a break from each other, as of right now I’m not seeing him.” Concern etched its way onto his mothers gentle features and his father seemed to relax. “Why?” His mother asks. “Love is more complicated than I once thought, eomma.” He smiles sheepishly and she stares at him caringly. My son, you’ve grown, she thought. “Are you two going to stop seeing each other in the future?” His father asks. “I’m not sure.”

“Will you date women while you’re taking a break from him?” Of course he’d say women and not mention men. “I have no interest  in anyone else, besides him.” 

“Then I don’t understand….” Jonghyun bites the inside of his cheek to keep from saying something his father would find rude. “You don’t have to understand, and I’ve come to learn that you don’t have to accept it either.” He stares intently into his fathers eyes. “But I love Kibum, I love a man and you want to know something, abeoji?” He glances at his mother and then looks back at his father. “I proposed to him. I want to marry him. When someone means as much to me as Kibum does, I want to be with that person for the remainder of my life.”

“Jonghyun what nonsense…”

“I’m still young, I’m in college, I know that I do, but I also know that I love Kibum. This is definite.” His mother was beaming, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “Jonghyun.” His fathers teeth were tightly clenched. Jonghyun stands up, dropping down to his knees and bowing his head. “Beat this son of yours that prefers a stick over a peach.” His father jumped up with subtle rage and his mother clutched his shirt, trying to hold him back. Jonghyun kept his head down, eyes glued to the ground. He had to get at least a minimal reaction from his father, he had to let him know that he was not giving up on Kibum. He loves him too much and soon he’ll sing his song, loudly and clearly so that Kibum could hear and understand the depth of his feelings. 

Dubu Speaking

DOUBLE UPDATE WOOOOH!!!

This girl's on a roll!!!!

Anyways, Jonghyun is growing up, my ship is maturing in this fic *sniffs*

And I just want to say thank you guys for reading, I appreciate you all SO MUCH more than you may think or know :)