“Please turn to page 25 in your textbooks.” The professor directed and Kibum obeyed, turning the page as Woohyun sat next to him. His glasses drooped on his nose and his eyes scanned over the words at a swift pace. Woohyun watches him, resting his elbow on the table and leaning his chin in the palm of his hand. Kibum seemed indifferent to his gaze and focused as ever on his work. Once spring break ended he came back to his classes prepared and ready to continue where he had left off. But what caught Woohyuns attention was that Kibum kept biting his lower lip and every now and then Woohyun could see the shake of his eyes. Something must have happened, Kibum seemed to be lost. A few moments later class was dismissed and the younger male shot out of his seat, gathering his things and rushing to the door. Woohyun blinks, jumping up and chasing after him. “Kibum!” He calls and Kibum glances back, only briefly before disappearing down the hall. Woohyuns feet stutter, slowly down until he stopped, standing in the middle of the hallway. He stares at the spot where Kibum was a few seconds ago and he heaves a sigh. He shoves a hand through his hair, turning around and his gaze met the familiar back of another man. His eyes trace up the figure and only when the person glanced back and stared through him did he know what happened. They had broken up. Jonghyun stared at him and it seemed as though he was peering into Woohyuns soul. He takes a step forward, moving closer to Woohyun, shortening the distance between them until there was none. “Woohyun,” Jonghyun spoke his name softly, brown eyes a faded color. “Yes?”

“I’m really tempted to kill you.” Woohyun felt himself shrink as Jonghyun chuckled. “But I won’t because it’s not your fault….” He trails off, glancing down at the ground before continuing on. “You actually helped me to realize something and that’s, that I can’t suffocate Kibum with my feelings…” His eyes drift again and he mutters. “It’s actually more complicated than that, but of course I won’t tell you why.” He brushes past Woohyun, their shoulders bump. Woohyun stood frozen, the bell ringing above him. 

The last three or so days of spring break passed blandly to Kibum as Jonghyuns words resonated throughout his entire existence. “I need sometime away from you, Kibum.” Had we broken up? Are we over? What is he doing right now? Kibum couldn’t empty his mind of these questions and then spring break ended and with it his relationship with Jonghyun. Are we really over? He thought this passing the music studio at the end of the day and absent-mindedly waiting for Jonghyun to drive him home. But the older male wasn’t there and Kibum walked home. He returned to his house, falling back onto his bed and letting out a long breath. He slides off his glasses, tossing them aside and rolling onto his stomach. He lays on his bed, his eyes slowly closing. 

The night air was cool on Kibums skin as he and Jonghyun walked down the street, hand in hand. “Why are we out so late?” He asks, rubbing a hand over his arms. Jonghyun chuckles, saying softly. “Think of it as our secret rendezvous.” Jonghyun winks and Kibum rolls his eyes. 

Kibums eyes snap open, trying not to recall the sweet, curious moments at the beginning of their relationship. 

That night Jonghyun took Kibum everywhere he had been to when he was younger. “If you’re ever curious about Seoul, I’ll show you around.” Jonghyun beams and Kibum stares down at him tenderly. “I’m more curious about you, Jonghyun.” He blurts and the olders eyes widen. “Really?”

“Yeah...I’ve always been curious.” Kibum peers at Jonghyun noticing the new twinkle cast in the olders eyes. “Oh, well….ask away!” He declares and Kibum smiles at him, tugging him ahead and they continued to walk. That night Kibum learned that Jonghyun was bullied when he was younger, he discovered that his boyfriend was shy when it came to talking in front of different and new people. He also learned that Jonghyun had a thing for lips, ‘oral fixation’ he called it. “That sounds inappropriate.” Kibum comments and Jonghyun laughs. “Mmm, it depends…”

“On what?” Kibum asks in disbelief and a mischievous grin slipped its way onto Jonghyuns lips. “Want to find out?”

“Not really.” Kibum drops his hand, turning away and skipping across the deserted street. Jonghyun stares after him calling out. “You look like a lunatic!”

“Shut-up!” He laughs. 

Kibum rubs his eyes, sitting up and rushing to the bathroom. He splashes himself with water because--god damn it-- the memories wouldn’t stop. It had only been a few days and the memories wouldn’t cease. Why? Days turned into a week and then two, three and the memories continued. 

“I don’t think I’ve kissed you here yet…” Jonghyun murmurs, looking around the college library and Kibum shrugs. “I think you have.”

“Mmm, but not like I may have wanted to.”

“Why?”

“People were watching.” Kibums eyes widen and he places the book back, facing Jonghyun with a teasing smile. “Oh? The player Kim Jonghyun was afraid of people watching? That’s new.” Kibum laughs and Jonghyun makes a face, his eyebrows creasing and his eyes growing dark. He grips Kibum by his shoulders, pushing him against the bookshelf and pressing his body into the youngers. “Jonghyun, stop it.”

“Remember the time in the library office when we first started dating and I had kissed you here,” He kisses his neck and Kibum shivers. “Here and here.” He kisses along the youngers jaw and shoulder. “At that time I wanted to do so many more things to you…” He takes a step back and with a sweet yet dark smile he whispers. “And now I can.”

Jonghyun sits in class, his eyes glazed over, tapping his pencil mindlessly against his notebook. “Yo, something wrong?” Amber pokes him, leaning over towards his ear and whispering. “Did something happen?” Jonghyun blinks, pulling himself away from the memories and shaking his head with a forced smile. “It’s just math.” He smiles warmly at her until she turns away with a slow nod. When class ended Jonghyun couldn't help but to wonder what Kibum was doing…. Pulling out his phone he flips through his messages. Of course there were none from the obnoxious male. Jonghyun could hear his laugh now and he found himself smiling. Damn, I love you. He grips his phone tightly, squeezing it before putting it away. 

Kibums hair--even though it was short--was pulled back into a honey-blonde ponytail and he wore loose overalls. “What are you doing?” Jonghyun asks and Kibum grins. “Follow me and you’ll see.” So he did and it turned out that he was painting a poster for a charity. “I didn’t know you helped out.” Kibum nods, bending down to dip his paint brush in a bucket of green paint. “I do a lot, especially with the underprivileged dance clubs for kids.” Jonghyun watches him in awe and mystification. “Ya learn something new everyday.” He comments, earning a light laugh from Kibum. The blonde glances back over his shoulder and says gently. “Don’t ya.”

“Ha.” Jonghyun watches him for a few moments more and the thought occured in the back of his mind, but only for a brief second. I’m gonna marry this guy. The thought flickered and then faded away. “Let me help you.”

“No, you’re gonna ruin what I have.”

“No I’m not.” Jonghyun says rolling up his shirt sleeves. “Fine, but if you do,” Kibum looks back at Jonghyun, wagging the paintbrush back and forth in front of his face. “I’m messing up that brown hair of yours.”

“Don’t you mess it up every night?” Jonghyun smirks and Kibum shoves him in his chest. “ idiot.” Kibum grumbles and Jonghyun chuckles, tossing out carelessly. “I love you.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Come on, say it back Kibum.”

“Just paint.” Jonghyun laughs, flipping his bangs back before coating the tip of his brush with red paint. 

After five weeks passed Kibum stopped reliving the memories and started back in the present. They both needed time; to mature, to learn and to be apart from each other. To learn that they didn’t need each other to survive, that it would be alright to be apart. But Kibum did miss Jonghyuns hands, his touch and smell and jokes--his stupid jokes. “Hey, Kibum!” He looks back and a new friend he had made--Luna from Travel--was waving to him. He smiles, walking over to her and taking a few books from her full hand. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” They walk quietly, her short hair bouncing atop her head. He had grown close to Luna and several other people in his class and so had Jonghyun. The older male now talked to not only Hae-sol but someone by the name of Jieun(female) and Hunchul(male) and Kibum understood that Jonghyun avoided him, he never saw Jonghyun in the library and it caused his heart to ache, but only slightly. Yes, he still loved Jonghyun, but this break was doing something for the both of them. His phone vibrates in his back pocket and he pauses, moving his books to his other hand as he pulled his phone out. He stares at his phone, squinting at the screen, his heart stopping. Luna peers at him curiously. Dino: look behind you

KIbum stares down at his screen, blinking, because Jonghyun had suddenly sent him a message, appearing out of the blue. “Kibum?” Luna asks and Jonghyuns message kept pecking at his mind; look behind you. So he did. He saw him and his breath caught, for so many reasons KIbum couldn’t say anything. And then Jonghyun smiled, a soft reassuring smile. “ idiot.” He mouthed and Jonghyuns smile broadened but only temporarily. Jonghyun glances at Luna and bows, walking away and turning down the hall. Kibum took a step forward, wanting to chase after him, but he remembered Jonghyuns smile. He’s coming back for me, for us. We needed this, this time apart. Kibum grips the books, turning away and walking ahead of Luna. He bites his bottom lip. I miss him. 

Dubu Speaking

I'm too tired to leave a proper authors note and explanation

i'll just let you guys deduce what you must

Thanks as always for reading and I'm going to sleep now~