It was static, it was silence without a way out, it was a calm that came before the storm, it was something to be afraid. It was an atmosphere where no one moved, even the bravest would think twice before doing it. Luckily you were a reckless, just like Jacob, you would move in that atmosphere, because you were desperate for answers, to see him that close. Because you loved him.

You were moving without knowing, without thinking about it, you just moved. And he kept his back to you, knowing that you were there, moving, without stopping you. But he was the center of the calm, of the tension, and he wasn't been as welcomed as you hoped, as you wished. Three steps more and you will be there. With him and nothing, no one could ever move you away.

-I am sick

You stop, for a second, but you do. And you could stop altogether, just stand there. And be a coward once more, and for once give him what he wants. But love is selfish. Two steps

-I

-Of the heart

And you should freeze altogether, but you don't, because he is talking. He is like your siren. And because what he says is your punishment. Is why you give another step.

-Don't

-It's for the best

And that doesn't stop you, that makes you jump to him, forgetting how to walk, forgetting that he is sick. Just thinking, that no, it's not for the best. You know that since the time you left him go away, you know that much. And that is why you ambush him with a hug from the back. How you missed the heath from his body, the way he would unconsciously get closer to you, you miss his scent that you could pick up when you hide in his neck. And there it was where you spoke.

-Care

He stays calm, cold and still. And it does hurt, but you get it, it wasn't like he would be with his arms open, even with the songs, even with all the, no,  interactions you had this couple of weeks. You know that. You would have to talk it out, to speak the truth and fix this. Because that was what you knew the most. To fix the two of you.

-I am so so sorry

You have to explain, but its a start, a good start if any at all. And that's good. Because the moment you say that he relax and breaths, breaths you hiding in his arms. It almost feels like yesterday. Except it's not because you are broken, he is sick, and you have to talk and know. It's a nice start.

-Baka...

He laughs, low and airy. And it had been a long time since you heard it that close. Of course, you are in doubt to what brought it up.

-I know...everything

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