Pairing(s); Seyeol(though not really because I’m a bum and got sidetracked), Chenyeol(Bromance), Xiuchen

Rating/Warnings; PG,

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Chanyeol, Chanyeol are you listening? Chanyeol? Park!” Jongdae hit him sharply on the head, making him snap out of his trance to glare at his best friend.

“What?” he spat.

“Stop staring at your prince charming and move your fat arse, we’re due in charms.”

“Huh? Oh, yeah…” Chanyeol’s attention was taken away again as a certain boy with blonde hair walked past them, waving at Chanyeol in a friendly manner….until Jongdae decided he’d had enough of his friend and promptly walloped the backside of his head with ‘The Standard Book of Spells-Grade Five’ before marching away, leaving behind Chanyeol’s shouts of profanity.

[BOOP]

“You didn’t have to hit me so hard.” Chanyeol muttered as he rubbed the large lump that had formed on his head.

“Well you were off in fairyland, weren’t you?” Jongdae replied coolly, pretending to take down notes when he was really scribbling on a map of the castle, marking potential spots for setting up bait traps. He knew all about the locomotor charm anyway.

“I wasn’t in fairy land.” Chanyeol huffed back indignantly.

“Oh right sorry, you were in ‘I’m totally madly in love with Oh Sehun’ land.”

Chanyeol elbowed him in the ribs and Jongdae squealed like a piglet and fell off his chair, making half the class and the professor stop making pencil cases move around to turn around and stare at Jongdae, who was glaring daggers into Chanyeol, who was trying very hard not to crack up.

“You’re dead Park.” He hissed in a low voice as he pulled himself back into his seat.

Chanyeol was too busy sniggering to pay any attention to the death threats he was receiving, instead he pointed his wand at an origami crane and tried to make it hover, but it just burst into flames instead. It was Jongdae’s turn to laugh as Chanyeol panicked and yelled ‘aguamenti!’ at the burning paper, sending a hosepipe stream of water gushing out of the tip of the wand and promptly hitting the back of Jessica Jung’s head, making her whip her head around and glare at him. Chanyeol immediately gushed out apologies with more force than his charm while his ‘best friend’ sat next to him, cackling his off.

“Park, please stop rattling your wand around like a baboon.” The professor told him off wearily.

“Right sir, sorry sir.” Chanyeol muttered before setting his wand down and watching in irritation as Jongdae brandished his own and lifted both their pencil cases and a notebook to hover from the desk and zoom around serenely, glancing at Chanyeol with an obvious look of mockery. “ you Jongdae.”

“Not my fault you’re clumsier than a troll trying to do ballet, Park.”

“I need new friends.” Chanyeol reflected miserably as the bell rang and everyone rushed to pack their bags.

“Like anyone would be friends with you.” Jongdae scoffed, sweeping his own things into his bag and slinging it over his shoulder.

“I’m a loveable person thank you very much.” Chanyeol responded indignantly as they both walked out of the classroom.

“Right. You, loveable.”

Chanyeol hit him. Jongdae elbowed him back. They continued their little scuffle on their way to Herbology until Chanyeol decided it was a good idea to smack Jongdae smartly on the upside of his head before sprinting off and barging through the crowd of students.

“YAH PARK CHANYEOL GET YOUR BACK HERE!” Jongdae pulled out his wand and tried to aim at the head that stood out above everyone else’s watching it get gradually smaller. Sighing, he gave up on cursing Chanyeol for now, thinking he would get him back sometime in herbology. Readjusting his bag, Jongdae started walking in the direction Chanyeol had run off to before doing a double take and promptly veering off into the other direction; the direction they were actually meant to go.

[BOOP]

Twenty minutes later Park Chanyeol came bursting into greenhouse three and, after muttering apologies to the professor, shuffled to his usual spot where they were working on fanged geraniums.

“Nice of you to join us, Chanyeol.” Jongdae greeted cordially. Chanyeol spared him a glare before snatching up a trowel and stabbing up some dragon dung, dumping it on the geranium and making it hiss and snap back at him.

“Careful, Park!” The professor scolded. “You’re suffocating it.”

“Sorry Sir.” Chanyeol mumbled moving to brush some of the fertiliser off the plant with a dragon-hide covered hand.

“Hey Yeol,” Jongdae said suddenly moving in and lowering his voice, “if we took one of these and slipped it in Seungri’s trunk reckon he’d scream like a little girl?”

Chanyeol looked over to the geranium which was currently having a snapping match with the venomous tentacula, since neither was close enough to actually attack the other. A grin started to spread on his face as he slowly turned to Jongdae, eyes glinting.

[BOOP]

“Hey Kris.”

Said boy looked up.

“Oh hey Chanyeol.”

“How was your day?” Chanyeol plopped down onto the seat next to Kris, grinning at him rather dumbly.

“Not bad,” Kris shrugged, “you?”

“Mine’s good.” Chanyeol replied, wide grin still plastered onto his face. “It’s about to get better though.” His oversized eyes followed Seungri as the boy walked into the fifth year dorm. Kris merely raised an eyebrow before turning back to his book, only to have his concentration wrenched from him as a high pitched scream emitted from the dorms.

“WHAT THE IS THIS?!”

Chanyeol burst out in laughter, falling onto the floor and rolling around as Seungri came pelting back out of the dorms, half undressed and mortified. Once he spot Chanyeol, however, his expression turned into accusation.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

Half of the common room turned to stare, the other half was far too used to this by now. Chanyeol would have answered Seungri’s question, but in all honesty he was simply too busy laughing. With one final, reproachful look before storming off and shouting over his shoulder.

“You’re getting rid of them!”

“What did you do to him?” Kris asked once Seungri had left and Chanyeol had calmed down a bit.

“Let a fanged geranium and some venomous tentaclua have a wrestling match in the middle of his trunk.”

Kris stared at him.

“It was Jongdae’s idea.” He shrugged. “But I suggested putting them both in instead of just one.”

Kris continued to stare.

[BOOP]

“So how was it?”

“Great, he did  scream like a little girl. Except he made me get rid of them.”

“But wasn’t it worth it?” Jongdae laughed jovially, clapping Chanyeol on the back.

“Totally.” Chanyeol grinned back.

“If Seungri thinks that was bad he should watch out.” Jongdae said, a sly grin stretching on his face.

“What are you thinking of?” Chanyeol asked excitedly.

“All will be revealed in good time.” He replied secretively. “That and I haven’t quite worked it out yet. Oh hey look it’s Sehun.”

Chanyeol snapped his head up and promptly waved energetically at the boy who had just walked into the library.

“Hey Sehun-ah!”

“Oh hey hyung. What happened to your wrist?” Sehun clasped the hand Chanyeol had raised, staring at the marks that were around his wrist.

“Venomous tentacula got me.” He replied, grimacing slightly.

“Hyung you should be more careful.” Sehun said with a little pout, rubbing his thumb over the wound. “Well, I’d better go, I promised Jonginnie I’d study with him. See you later, hyung.”

“Bye Sehun.” Chanyeol stared after him dreamily. Jongdae gave him thirty seconds to marvel after the boy that had already disappeared before slapping him across the face.

“Ouch! What the ?”

“Come on lover boy, we’ve got History of Magic.”

[bleepity boopity boop]

“Chanyeol Chanyeol Chanyeol!” Jongdae ran across the great hall, along the other house tables and down the Slytherin one, causing several students to turn their heads in either confusion, irritation or both. Chanyeol swung his head around, mouth full of his breakfast. There was a small dribble of sauce mixed with what looked like saliva steadily rolling down to his chin.

“I’ve just had this brilliant idea.” He said, lowering his voice as he drew closer and squishing his way between Chanyeol and Sehun, making the latter mumble in disapproval. Chanyeol made an unintelligible mumbling noise through a mouthful of sausages and eggs, but Jongdae recognized it to be something along the lines of “what is it?”

“Okay so I’ve been doing some reading,”

“Mmhmm”

“About wands”

“Mmhmm”

“And I found the wand that would be brilliant.”

“Mmmmhmmmhmmmhmmm?”

“Hazelwood.”

**********************************************************************************************************

Seungri went for his regular stroll along the grounds. It was meant to be for his ‘prefect duties’ but there were other people for that. He had heard from a classmate that there were some very attractive females planning to go for a nice relaxation near the lake. He pulled out his wand and started to twirl it around between his fingers, other hand casually in his pocket in what he knew was a cool casual manner , just thinking about how the weather couldn’t get finer with the clear blue skies and bright sunlight, when suddenly…

He dropped his wand with a little high pitched scream of terror. His wand was doing magic, on its own. He stared incredulously as his wand lay there innocently on the grass, emitting silver puffs of tear-shaped smoke. His wand. Was doing magic. He tried to pick the wand up when a particularly large tear blossomed its way out of the tip of his wand and Seungri jumped back again, squealing.

“Seungr-what are you doing?” it was Jiyong

“My wand, hyung, my wand! Help me” Seungri pleaded in a high pitched whimper.

**********************************************************************************************************

“You. Are a genius.”

“I know.”

“Did you see his face?”

“I know!”

“His expression.”

“His squeal.” Chanyeol gave out a whoop of laughter, smacking his thigh with a painful-sounding ‘thwack!’ .Even the poker faced Sehun was cracking a smile. Jongdae had to admit it. Sometimes, his ingenuity surprised even himself. At that moment, Seungri trudged into their corner of the library, clutching his wand and looking thoroughly exhausted.

“Hey, Seungri. Why so down?” Jongdae said. . Chanyeol, on the other hand, was having much difficulty restraining his laughter.

“I Hate. My. Bloody. Wand.”

“Naww, what happened?” Chanyeol burst into laughter and Jongdae, despite himself, cracked a smile. Seungri looked up slowly and his eyes widened in realisation.

“….You did not.”

“What did I do? It was your wand that did it” Chanyeol completely lost it, rolling around in his chair. Jongdae gave Seungri a sickeningly angelic smile and Seungri looked simultaneously like he was going to strangle Jongdae and faint. Madam Pince stalked over, a scowl on her face and the four of them hushed as to not get kicked out.

“Are you telling me” Seungri hissed, “that you didn’t make my wand do that?”

“I did not, dear sir.” Seungri blinked and stared at him in disbelief.

“Oh really?”

“Yes really.” Jongdae tossed a book towards Seungri. He caught it with his Quidditch-polished reflexes, staring down at it. ‘Wand Woods and their properties’ Seungri flipped to the only bookmarked page;

“Hazel Wands

A sensitive wans, hazel often reflects its owner’s emotional state, and works best for a master, who understands and can manage their own feelings. Others should be very careful handling a hazel wand if its owner has a recently lost their temper, or suffered a serious disappointment, because the wand will absorb such energy and discharge it unpredictably. The positive aspect of a hazel wand more than makes up for such minor discomforts, however, for its capable of outstanding magic in the hands of the skilful, and is so devoted to its owner that it often ‘wilts’ (which is to say, it expels all its magic and refuses to perform, often necessitating the extreaction of the core and its insertion into another casing, if the wand is still requires) at the end of its master’s life (if the core in unicorn hair, however, there is no hope; the wand will almost certainly have ‘died’). Hazel wands also have the unique ability to detect water underground, and will emit silvery, tear-shaped puffs of smoke if passing over concealed springs and wells.”

Seungri read through the last sentence again, ‘have the ability to detect underground water’

Jongdae sat there smiling and blinking up and Seungri, who looked thoroughly surprised.

“How did you know my wand was Hazel?”

“A true genius does all of his research.” Jongdae replied promptly, tapping his temple with a finger. Chanyeol was at least calming down a bit, but tears were still rolling down his cheeks. Seungri appeared vaguely impressed, yet still more confused.

“How did you find underground water to lure me there?” at this, Jongdae gave a little ‘tsshk’ of exasperation.

“Seungri, you were near a lake. How hard would it be not to find underground water?

“……oh yeah…” There was a pause. Seungri sighed in resignation and frustration at the fact that he couldn’t actually do anything about what Jongdae had done, he sank down in a particularly squishy armchair

“I hate you both” Seungri groaned, eyes closing in fatigue.

“Hey Seungri?” Jongdae said. Seungri lifted a lid to look reproachfully at him.

“What?”

“Puff, puff, puff.” Chanyeol fell out of his chair laughing and Seungri lobbed ‘Wand Woods and their Properties’ at Jongdae’s head, hoping he’d lose some of his far-too-intelligent brain cells.

[]

Kim Jongdae jumped about a foot off the ground as a blood-curdling scream pierced the air and hit his ears like a rampaging hippogriff on drugs. Inwardly blessing the fact that he had put a sound barrier around the vicinity, Jongdae jumped out of his hiding spot and sprinted back towards the corridor near the kitchens, thinking it was rather unusual for a girl to be out getting a snack from the kitchens this late when-

Wait what.

He stopped in his tracks as he caught sight of the girl that had screamed at being victimized by him. Except the girl, wasn’t a girl. Or were they? They looked a bit like a girl, and they certainly screamed like one, and yet they were wearing the boys uniform, and the fact that their shirt was dangling over their head more or less proved that this student was not a girl. Jongdae’s momentary silence was enough for the boy’s flailings to rotate him to face Jongdae. He spluttered, trying to move his shirt out of the way of his face so he could speak.

“H-help me!”

Why is his voce so high-pitched?

“Errrm”

Jongdae stood there dumbfounded, staring at the dangling boy, before realising that he had set up this trap, and this boy had fallen for it. A grin started to cross his face as amusement caught up to the rest of his thoughts, and a calming sweep of arrogance masked over him.

“No.”

The boy blanched

“W-what?”

“No.”

“Let me down!”

“Mmmm, nope.”

“B-b-but, I can’t do it on my own!”

“I do believe that’s kind of the point.”

The boy had done another 360 and was spinning to face him again, forehead and cheeks turning red due to blood flow. Jongdae hopped forward and promptly poked one a cheek, making the boy squeal.

“Hehe, your cheeks are so squishy. I think I’ll call you baozi.”

The boy spluttered again.

“I-I-I’m not a baozi! Let me down!”

“You forgot the magic word~” Jongdae replied in a sing-song voice

“Wha-I-you-magic word?!”

The boy looked like he was flaming at the prospect of asking politely to be let down from falling into a prank trap when-

His cheeks seemed to deflate

“p…please?”

CRASH! Jongdae let the boy down, leaving him lying in a dizzy haze and thought it best to leave the scene before he came back to full consciousness. This boy, he decided once he had turned a corner into a shortcut, was going to be a lot of fun.

****************

The next time Jongdae ran into the boy was in the corridor. Instantly distinguishable by his squishy cheeks, he seemed somewhat happier than the time he was hanging upside down, chatting animatedly to one of his fellow housemates as he walked to his next class. Jongdae watched as his eyes casually scanned across the students around him, pausing briefly on Jongdae and frowning slightly as though he could not quite place where he had seen that harsh jawline before. However a moment passed and the boy seemed to dismiss Jongdae, turning back to his friend as he strode right past him and Chanyeol, who was busy looking for his box of every-flavour beans to pay too much attention to the people around him, consequently knocking into several small first years on their way to Transfiguration.

****************

Minseok sat in History of Magic next to Joonmyun, doodling idly on the corner of his page while his mind wandered to that strange boy he had seen in the corridor. Where have I seen him before? I swear, that jaw seems really famili-OHHHH! And it seemed to click; the boy who had hung him upside down the other day, that’s who he was. He probably didn’t recognise him sooner because he was used to seeing the boy’s face upside down, but nevertheless it was hard to forget those facial features that vaguely resembled a t-rex. Minseok giggled, which made Joonmyun stare at him.

****************

Jongdae seemed to see a lot of Baozi Boy the following few weeks; in the corridors, stuck in one of his prank traps, on the Quidditch pitch, hanging upside down and shrieking higher than a girl, sitting on the Hufflepuff table eating meals and struggling to keep his robes from falling over his face as he dangled from his ankle two metres off the floor. The routines seemed quite regular, and Jongdae found immense enjoyment out of teasing the poor boy; well, more enjoyment than he did pranking most of the other people in the school. There seemed to be a certain something in that scream of terror, the way his cheeks puffed up so that he resembled a chipmunk, the frantic look in his eyes that made clear that no matter how many times he fell into Jongdae’s traps, he’d still be just as terrified and lost. Call it cruel, but Baozi Boy’s dismay seemed to bring immense pleasure to the evil little called Kim Jongdae

****************

T-Rex Boy seemed to pop up everywhere. Walking past each other in the corridors, hanging him upside down during his frequent trips to the kitchens, out on the Quidditch pitch alongside that Slytherin beater, hanging him upside down in random corridors, strolling across the grounds frequently, and gazing at him in amusement from a world that had been flipped on its head. Minseok frequently wondered whether T-Rex Boy had a thing for picking on him specifically, but dismissed it every time, since Joonmyun had told him he was a big prankster who loved chaos. He tried to avoid him whenever he could, ducking into spare classrooms and even making less late-night trips down to the kitchen, satisfying himself with the pantry in the Hufflepuff basement, but he still seemed to find a way to appear in Minseok’s sight so often it was creepy. T-rex boy, he decided, was weird and should be avoided at all costs.

[shippity dippity itty ]

There went the bell.

Kim Minseok jolted straight up in his seat, only to notice Joonmyun already gone. Probably to dive straight into the library. He rubbed his cheek a bit, hoping he hadn’t drooled, and swept all his books sprawled across  his desk into his arms, having woken up a bit late to properly pack up. It was break anyway—he’d just head to his common room and properly pack his bags…

But the moment he set foot out of his charms classroom with his mass load of books and half-ped bag, another body came colliding straight into him, knocking him to the side. With a yelp, Minseok stumbled, just managing to catch himself before clumsily falling on his , but consequently dropping his books everywhere.

“Oh!” Minseok looked up, taking a good look at the boy who wore the bright blue Ravenclaw uniform, and blinking in recognition. “Sorry baozi!” the boy chirped ‘apologetically’.

“Oh…” it’s just you. “it’s okay…”

Minseok bent down to sweep all his things together again, T-rex boy leaning down to help him.

“Thanks…” Minseok mumbled, his books returned to him and straightening up.

But instead, the boy leant forward, and reaching out to poke his cheeks. “Hehe, your cheeks look even more fluffy when you’re flustered.”

Minseok frowned, shuffling backwards. “Thanks, but no thanks.”

The boy grinned and cheerily took out his wand. “Want me to make them bigger?”

Minseok stared at his wand, backing away. “No thanks.”

“Oh no wait, wait!” He turned, but before he had even taken a step, T-rex boy had rushed infront of him, blocking his path.

Minseok’s eyes travelled up to his face, raising his eyebrows. “Um excuse me.”

The boy looked dramatically disappointed with a half-assed pout. “You’d look good with balloon cheeks. Shame.”

Minseok fixed him with an exasperated, fed up look. “No. Please—I have to get to Transfiguration.”

Of course, that was a lie, Minseok really just wanted to get back to his dorm, but T-rex boy side stepped anyway to let him pass. “Maybe next time then hmm?”

Minseok didn’t spare him another glance before briskly walking along. There better be no more next times.

Little did he know, the Ravenclaw genius had easily seen straight through his lie. If he could memorise pages and pages of text for a test the next day, one timetable was nothing.

He waited, staring at Minseok from the corner of his eyes, until he was about to turn a corner before extracting his wand stealthily out of his pocket and carefully taking aim.

Baozi  cheekus fly awayus!

Not even a moment later Minseok had dropped all his books yet again, screaming. He tried to curse, but nothing but gibberish seemed to want to come out of his mouth.

Kim Jongdae doubled over with laughter.

Minseok wailed, twitching on the floor, and clutching his face.

Jongdae tottered over to him, just barely holding upright with his rather hyperventilating laughter. “You look… even more like… a chipmunk… oh gosh.”

Minseok flailed madly, kicking him square in the shin.

And that was the last straw for Jongdae to collapse on the floor, rolling around on the carpet in a mixture of pain and laughter.

Minseok kicked him again, narrowly missing his balls and scrambling to his feet, taking off at a run for the hospital wing. And yes, leaving everything else behind.

Throughout the whole process of Jongdae getting up off the floor and picking up Minseok’s books he barely stopped laughing, and only until he had trekked around to find his giant of a best friend had he somewhat calmed down.

“Here, go give these to him.”

Chanyeol stared down at the books dumped rather ceremoniously onto his lap with large eyes, before fixing them on Jongdae.

“What why.”

“Because he's going to run away from me if I try.”

Chanyeol blinked, before frowning and looking severely distasteful. “No! They’re going to think I did it again!”

Jongdae shrugged. “Better you than me.”

Chanyeol’s look of mild offense soon melted into a begrudging groan. “I always clean up your after you.”

“Yeah but it’s worth it.” Jongdae started grinning again. “Did you see his balloon cheeks?”

Chanyeol rolled his eyes at him. “Yes I did Jongdae.”

“Maybe you’ll get to poke them if you go.”

“….I'm pretty sure he'll scream in my face and I'm not as weird as you.”

Jongdae sighed, taking the books under his arm once more from Chanyeol’s large hands. “Fine I’ll go.”

“Oh don’t you be looking so depressed about it you’re dying to pinch his cheeks again, I know it.”

Jongdae didn’t answer, Chanyeol’s wide, Cheshire-cat-like-grin following him and watching him lumber off with the books.

He poked his head around the door.

“Hey baozi!”

Minseok, though still sitting up on a hospital bed, had been cured. His pout quickly morphed into a scowl, hissing at him.

Jongdae, however, strode in, holding out his books. “You left these.”

And just as Jongdae had put down Minseok’s books, sitting next to him on the bed, Madam Pomfrey told Minseok he was allowed to go, and instantaneously Minseok sprung up, gathering his stuff back up and almost sprinting to the door. Jongdae was left staring after him, looking horribly disappointed. Truthfully, he had been, after all, hoping he would have gotten to poke his cheeks again.

Minseok squeaked, almost tripping while running down the stairs, dashing straight into the safety of his common room, safe from any more prowling T-rexes for a good ten minutes, while Jongdae himself quickly slipped out of the hospital wing before he got told off.

****************

Minseok skipped down the stairs to the entrance hall, having seen not the moving shadow of the t-rex boy since the hospital wing all the way up till dinner, and honestly, it had picked his mood right up.

He was hungry, the smell of the food for dinner making him even more happy after a long lesson of horrid Transfiguration, making him almost forget the whole incident…

But all of a sudden, Minseok was ambushed by the appearance of a session of poking.

Then, as quickly as he’d come, T-rex boy continued his way past Minseok down the stairs and into the great hall.

Minseok eventually stopped shrieking and fuming, picking up the books he’d dropped again from the fright, and now grumpily storming off for his food.

_______________________________________________________________

A/N

aaaand chapter 2 is up!

my plan is to put chapter 3 up in another 2 days and then maybe give it a week or 2 rest while I sort out the next lot of chapters because I have family coming over for the Christmas/New Year holidays and I might not be able to go on here or write/edit/manage too much.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter.

Actual ship-making next time :D

~Unicorn