A/n: From this update onwards, it’s gonna be the present. We’ve been stuck in the past for too long. It’s time to go back to the present and see what’s going on between them.

She heard movement again and immediately went back to her bed. She pulled the comforter and pretended to sleep. Her heart was pounding furiously for she feared of what is about to come. He’s outbreak was the worst that she’s ever heard. She felt the bed sank a little and a muscular and warm hand s over her waist, bringing her closer.

He stepped out and lay next to her. He slowly s his hand over her waist and pulled her closer. He buried his face into her neck and breather in the sweet scent of hers.

‘I’ll only love this scent and if this is the last time I’ll be able to smell it, I’ll cherish it.’ he thought.

“I’m sorry Sooyeon. I’m sorry that things had to turn out this way. I’m sorry that I broke all the promises. You trusted me with your heart, but I broke it into pieces. Baby, you deserve better.” He whispered in the silence, thinking that the love of his life was asleep. As he lay next to her, he gently caressed her arms and her hair. He stayed with her for the last time. It was a sleepless night for him as he stared at the ceiling, reflecting his actions and thinking about his decision. He sighed.

She felt his warm skin against hers and melted at his touch. After all this year, his touch is till the one she loves. ‘What’s next for us Taengoo? What’s on your mind? You’ve been so distant Kim Taeyeon.’ she wondered. Wanting to seek more warmth from him, she turned around and faces him, eyes still closed. She buried her face into his neck and breathes in his scent, the scent that she has grown accustomed to.

She stirred and turned to him. He stared at her beautiful face. “What did I ever do to deserve such beautiful angel in my life?” he whispered as he caressed her face. He gently kissed her cheeks and let it linger for a while. As he held her close, he began singing a lullaby…

I remember what you wore on that first day
You came into my life and I thought
“Hey, you know, this could be something”

‘Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I’m left with nothing

So maybe it’s true
That I can’t live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There’s so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you’ve already got me coming undone
And I’m thinking two is better than one

I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing

‘Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything’s okay
I’m finally now believing

That maybe it’s true
That I can’t live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There’s so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you’ve already got me coming undone
And I’m thinking two is better than one
yeah, yeah

I remember what you wore on that first day
You came into my life and I thought, “Hey”,


Maybe it’s true
That I can’t live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There’s so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you’ve already got me coming undone
And I’m thinking two is better than one

And I’m thinking
I can’t live without you
‘Cause, baby, two is better than one
There’s so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
But I’ll figure it out
When all is said and done
Two is better than one
Two is better than one

His voice soothed her as always and she slowly drifted to sleep next to him. The last word she heard before falling asleep was “I’m sorry but I love you..”

The wide horizon and white clouds surrounded him. That was the only view that he’s been admiring for the past hours. He was all alone and had no one to talk to. The notepad and pen in hands were vigorously at work as he stared out the window. That was he’s only companion, aside from the clouds. ‘How are you right now, princess? Did I hurt you real bad? Is your heart hurting like mine? I’m so sorry baby…’

Flashback

He stared at the person across him with a frown. What has happened to him? He has never seen him like that. He continued staring at the younger version of him. He waited until he was ready to talk.

He fidgeted around his seat as he could feel his eyes on him. He had his head down, unsure of how to start the conversation.

“Appa, can I use your private jet?” he asked his father that was seated across him.

“Why son?”

“I wanna have a short getaway, dad.”

“A getaway? Are you sure you have the time for it?”

“I need it dad. I really do..”

“Are you sure you’re not running away?” he probed.

“I don’t know. All I know is that I just need some time alone and get used to it.”

“What happened son?”

“I’ve made a decision, dad.” He looked up to face him.

“What is it that you’ve chosen, son?”

“I think it’s pretty obvious, dad”

“Then why are you all broken Taeyeon? Shouldn’t you be confident in every decision that you make? Shouldn’t you believe that every choice you make is the right one and that you’ll leave no room for regret..?”

“Because I love her dad. I’m still damn in love with her but I can’t choose her.”

“Why not Taeng? You’d rather choose your career than the girl that you’re still so in love with?”

“That’s not what it seems, dad!”

“Well, that’s how it seems to me Taeyeon. That you’re choosing career over her.”

“No dad. I couldn’t choose! I wish I could choose her dad. I definitely will choose her but too many things are at risk. If I chose her, the company will be affected. I will be affected and your company too that. Even the country will be affected. Maybe if I didn’t choose this path, all this wouldn’t have happened but unfortunately, I did.”

“If only you had taken the path that was already created for you, this wouldn’t have happened. You know I never agreed to you choosing this path, but I gave in because I saw the changes that you’ve made. The contributions that you’ve made to the country and our family but the path you’ve chosen has caused you to lose the one that you love because it’s taking you away from her. She no longer have you to herself. Not only her, it’s also hard for you to come home Taeng. I let it go because I see the joy in your eyes when you’re working and I’m proud of you but I hate to see you like this Taeng..”

He paused and waited for some kind of response from his son. Getting no reply, he continues with his speech.

“You’re really mature son but will you be able to deal with pain? I understand what you mean. I understand how bad it will be if you choose her but does it really mean you have to let her go? Is there no other way to go about doing it? Is there really no way that you can save it..?”

“She’s suffered too much just by being with me. She may not say it, but I can see it in her eyes. I’ve broken too many promises and most importantly, I’ve broke her. She’s all broken because of me. Dad, I can’t be selfish. She’s only going to be more hurt if we continue on. I don’t like the thought of letting her go nor do I like the thought of some guy coming in and claiming her as his but I don’t have a choice. Her happiness matters more than anything to me dad.. ” he choked at his words as tears streamed down his cheeks.

“Alright Taeyeon. If that’s what you’ve decided, than fine but I would appreciate it if you meet your mum first. She’ll kill me if I didn’t tell her about you.” he said and patted his back. Although the path of life that he’s son has chosen was not to his liking, he accepted it in the end when he saw how big he’s become and how talented he was. He sat there and comforted him and just let him cry his eyes out. It was not always that he sees him in that state but he knows that right now, he’s only son is vulnerable and broken right now.

“Son, just remember that life is full of obstacles but all the obstacles are not meant to pull you down and bury you alive. It’s meant to make you stronger. Right now, you’re experiencing one of the obstacles that life has thrown to you but I believe that you’ll pull yourself together and overcome it. One more thing son, always believe in fate and destiny. Your love for her is genuine and because you love her, you’re letting her go to seek the happiness that she deserves although it’s killing you. Son, if she’s meant for you, nothing can ever deny it. If you’re meant to be together, you’ll eventually find your way to each other no matter what the circumstances are.”

She woke up to find him gone. She missed him already. She sat up and noticed that the picture frame of their first kiss at sunset was facing down. She walked to the dressing table and found a letter.

To: The Angel Who Owns My Heart

Dearest Sooyeon,

By the time you read this letter, I’m already gone. I’m no longer with you physically but believe me baby, I’m always with you emotionally. If ever you need me, I’ll come running to you. No matter how far I am, if you need me, just call me. If ever I can’t be there for you physically, close your eyes and look into your heart. I’ll be there.

Sooyeon, it’s already our 9t^h year together. I can’t believe that’s how fast time flies. I still remember the first time I saw you and how I fell so hard upon seeing you. Yes, I fell real hard since I mistook mustard for chili. You were breath taking. You were so flawless and I knew instantly that I had to get to know you.

We’ve tried so hard to make it work. We tried everything that we could but I guess our relationship has taken its course. As much as I love you, it’s not enough to rekindle the flame and sparks that we once had. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be better. I’m sorry that I didn’t see it coming earlier.

I guess it’s true that every beginning has ending. We worked so hard to make our love story as beautiful as ever but like any other story, it has to have an ending. Unfortunately, the ending to ours isn’t as beautiful as how it started. Forgive me for not being able to protect the love that we had. Forgive me for choosing my career and not you. If I could, I would definitely choose you, but many parties will be affected and it isn’t fair if I made that choice.

As of today, I’m letting you go. I’m setting you free Sooyeon. If in the future, you were to meet a better guy, please make sure that he will love you more than himself. Ensure that he embrace you every single time and sing you a lullaby. Be sure that he protects you from any harm and treat you like a princess. You’re a precious jewel, Sooyeon. You deserve nothing but the best and unfortunately, I am not the best.

I’m letting you go because I believe that if we’re destined to be together, we’ll find our way back. Our memories will forever be engraved in my heart. No one else has the key to my heart except for you my dear. So please keep it well and keep it safe. Don’t lose it for I never want to fall in love with anyone else.

This is my last goodbye Sooyeon. I hope you know how deeply in love I am with you. You may no longer be mine in this world but in the next and the other, you’ll be mine. I’ll find you and embrace you in my arms like how you love it. Baby, my last request is to see you in 3 weeks’ time, together with the rest.

I love you Jessica Jung Sooyeon. More than I could ever imagine. Till we meet again my beautiful Angel.

Kim Taeyeon

She fell to her knees as she read the letter. He freed her from the pain but little did he realize that she was willing to go through all the pain for him although it tires her out. She screamed her lungs out that morning with overwhelming pain. The excruciating pain that engulfed her. “Kim Taeyeon! Come back! Don’t leave me! I love you Taengoo” She shouted.

All 8 of them rushed over to her place upon learning about what has happened. Seohyun was particularly affected as she never expected her brother to take such measures. All the girls were comforting her and the guys were talking amongst themselves about what they should do. They tried calling their best friend but he did not answer it.

“Hyo, did you know about his decision?” Soo asked.

“How would I know? He never told me anything.”

“He’s your cousin!”

“Yul hyung! You’re the closest to him, did you know about this?”

“Not at all. The last time I met him, he only said that he’s tired and he can’t bear to see her in that state. He said he’s not being fair to her and maybe he should do something. I never expected him to have done this!”

“Unnie, I’m so sorry about what has happened. I never expected oppa to do something like this. He didn’t even tell me about it. If I had known, I would’ve stopped him unnie. Unnie, I’m really sorry.” He outbreak shocked everyone.

“Seohyun-ah, it’s not your fault. He didn’t even tell anyone about it. Don’t be too hard on yourself.” Woori comforted her.

“But he’s my brother. I should know but I didn’t. Oppa took it upon himself. Usually, he’ll tell me everything but this time he didn’t. As a sister, I should’ve asked him but lately, I was too busy.” She cried.

Yoong embraced her and tried to calm her. “It’s not your fault hyunnie. Hyung didn’t even tell anyone about it.” He tried to assure his love that she’s not at fault.

“Taeng has been in dilemma for a while. It was very obvious. He felt guilty that he broke all his promises and was never there for you lately. He felt undeserving of your love after he made you cry. Kim Taeyeon is still the same guy we know but because he no longer belongs just to us, we have to accept it. He belongs to the public as well. They love him as much as we love him. When he took up this path, he never expected to hit it big, but he did.” Hyo said, defending his cousin.

“He’s right. If he had known that this was the outcome, he wouldn’t have chosen this path.” Soo backed him up.

“Actually, I did met up with him a few days ago..” Tiffany opened up.

“What?! He did? How come you didn’t tell us about it?!” Yul raised his voice a little bit. All eyes were on him and back to her. They waited for her to continue on.

“Well, it wasn’t plan. One of the nights, it was past midnight when he called up and asked to meet. I reluctantly agreed upon hearing his voice. He sounded down and I couldn’t help but pity him besides, it’s been a while since I saw him and if you had seen him, you’ll feel bad too…”

Flashback

She stepped into the meeting place and scanned around the area to find him. She finally spotted him and walked up to him. She took a sit and ordered her drink. She turned to look at him and was shocked to see him with bloodshot eyes. He looked shagged.

“What happened to you? You look exhausted. Wait, when was the last time you had a proper sleep, Taeyeon?” she asked worriedly.

“If you’re talking about 8 hours full of sleep, can’t remember. But the last sleep that lasted more than 1hour was probably 48 hours ago..” he answered and gave her a small smile.

“What?! That long? Taeng, you need to get proper sleep. C’mon let’s go home now so you can get some rest at least. We can talk about whatever it is some other time. Your health is impostant Taeyeon.” She was all ready to leave when he stopped her.

“No, I’m fine. I just need to talk to you.”

“Is it about Jessica?”

“How is she, Fany?” he asked, concerned was evident in his face.

“It’ll be a lie if I say she’s fine Taeng. She’s not fine but she’s pretending to be..”

“What’s happening with the 2 of you??” she asked concern.

“Here I thought you’ll know. It’s getting harder as day passes. I don’t know how much longer I can endure this..”

“What are you talking about? Are you breaking up with her?”

He just swirled his drink and drank it all and signalled for another glass before answering her.

“She’s all broken Tiffany. I know it’s hard for her to be with me. She doesn’t say it but I can see it. Just look at her! She’s no longer the cheerful, smiling and icy princess that I knew and I’m the reason for it..

“Taeng, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. I know it’s hard for you because of your job but you’ve got to try.”

“You’ve seen me Tiffany. How can I protect her, make her smile and be with her when I’m in this state? I wish I didn’t take this path but you all encouraged me and I’m not complaining because I love doing it but I don’t like seeing her like that..”

“I’m sure you can take time off right? Go on a vacation with her. Have a getaway and make-up to her.”

“We did Fany. Just a month ago I took time off from rehearsal to spend time with her. It helped but it didn’t last. When we returned, I had overwhelming schedules that I couldn’t escape. I’m preparing for the biggest thing in my life right now Miyoung.”

“Is career more important Taeyeon?” she asked with a frown.

“Nothing is more important than her Miyoung. I know I’m in a position where I need to make a choice and I know I should choose her but I can’t. The other parties will be equally affected because of my decision Tiffany..” he looked at her, sadness and hurt evident in his eyes.

“Taeyeon….”

“I’m the cause for her tears. I’m the cause for he changes. I’m the reason why she’s all broken. This was not what I promised her when I asked her to be my girlfriend. This wasn’t what I had envisioned for us. I never intended to be in this industry. I never wanted to be the cause of her tears but I already am. I’m the reason for her to be like this. So tell me, what right do I have to keep her by my side when she’s hurting and there is nothing I can do to take it all away? How can she be with someone that can never be there for her whenever she needs him? He used to be there for her anytime and anywhere but not anymore. Where’s the guy that comforts her and keep her warmth when she’s sleeping? That guy can’t be there because he isn’t even able to sleep with warmth. He can’t complain because he chose this path and no one can understand what he’s going through….”

She couldn’t answer him. He was right that no one can understand what he’s going through because no one knows what it’s like to be in his shoe. She just looked at him and couldn’t help but sympathized with his situation. He’s love for her is so genuine and it’s hurting him badly to even think of letting her go.

“Despite being an artist, you’re still Kim Taeyeon that I’ve known all my life. Taeyeon, I can never understand what you’re going through but I understand your intention. You feel that you don’t deserve her and that she’s better off with someone else, right? Someone that can keep her warm, safe and shower her with endless love? That will treat her right and always come running to her when she needs him?”

He nodded.

“But what if only you can do it Taeyeon? What if she only wants you Taeyeon? She’s holding on because she still loves you and she believe that things will work out. So why are you giving up when she isn’t? This was not what she signed up for when she accepted you but she did encourage you and supported you when you made the choice to be a singer. She knew what she’s signing up for Taeyeon.”

“But I can’t bear to see her Miyoung. Her eyes are full of sadness and she’s tired. She’s tired of waiting. She’s tired of the endless promises. She’s tired of all the rumours. She’s tired of being with me and I know it. I hate to see her Miyoung. So many times I try not to break down before her because of how fragile she looks. It breaks my heart whenever I see her because I’m the reason for it all. I promised to keep her happy and make her smile. I promised to love her till eternity but look now. I kept my promise of loving her but I can’t keep her smile and make her happy. She deserves someone else better. I miss hearing her laughter, seeing he smile and watching her filled with happiness and if letting her go means I can see all that, than I would even though it kills me. So do you think I’m still selfish? When all I want is for her to be happy? To be free and find her happiness?” he asked with tears streaming down his face. He looked at her pleadingly, to tell him that he’s making the right decision.

“Tell me I’m making the right decision. Tell me that I should walk away and set her free. Tell me that she deserve someone better than me. Tell me Miyoung.” He held her hand and made her look at him as he choked on his words.

“You’re selfless Kim Taeyeon. That’s all I can say, I can’t say that you’re making the right choice but I can say that you’re selfless. You’re willing to sacrifice your own happiness for her. You’re willing to go through the pain just to see her happy. You’re willing to let the love of your life go even if it kills you inside. Taeyeon, the moment you set her free, you’ll be crushed and I know that for sure because you genuinely love her. If you think you can endure the pain and bear with it, than fine but I know you won’t. I really don’t know how you can have the strength and courage Taeyeon…” she looked at him with curiosity.

“Because loving someone is all you can do. Loving someone doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to be with them. It just means that you’re strong enough to let them go and find their true happiness even it’s not with you. It doesn’t matter how much it hurts you because seeing them happy and smiling will make the pain worth it in the end…” he answered and gulped down his 4^th glass.

She stared at him and couldn’t help but to admire his determination, his love, his honesty, his talent and everything that he possess. Kim Taeyeon is not any normal adults like most. He’s smart and talented, have a heart of gold, wise, loving, protective, caring, helpful and the list just never ends. The Kim Taeyeon that is seating next to her is not the Kim Taeyeon that the public knows. They only see his cheerful, charismatic side but never this. Tiffany believes that she’s the only one that has seen him in such terrible state. As a friend, she wished she could do something for him but there’s nothing left to do. The boy was equally broken. In fact, he’s in worse state because he’s making the choice. She had the strong urge to call the rest of the group but she knew that it’s not right. He never wants to show anyone his vulnerable sight. So all she could do was to stay with him and accompany him and just be there for him.”

“Tiffany?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t tell anyone about this meet up. Don’t tell anyone that you’ve seen me in such state. No one has ever seen me like this…”

“Yeah, sure. Don’t worry and Taeng..”

“Yeah?”