Chapter 9

We had two performances today. After the last performance, everyone was tired. So we headed at the dorm immediately. After we have eaten, we gathered still at the kitchen. I was sitting beside our leader. I did that intentionally, not even subtly. I was very showy that I wanted to be okay with him. He knew that well. Since when we were at our venues, I gave my water to him, when his was emptied. I tried to help him gather all the members when he asked us to have a pep talk before our performance. I even tried to , or annoy him, with what the ELFs call the *evil maknae style*. It was obvious that I wanted us to be okay again. It had just been 2 days, going on 3, but it felt like eternity not talking to him in a normal manner. He was talking to me, but it was too civil, or too casual. I didn’t want that.

I know, it wouldn’t give him or the others idea that I liked him, since they knew what had happened and they’d understand that I didn’t want to strain our relationship.

Now, I was sitting beside him, he looked a bit weary again, lack of sleep maybe?

“Hyung, you looked restless.” I told him

“I guess it’s just the result of the performances we had.”

He doesn’t sound any bit annoyed now, he didn’t even look like it.

Though there was still an unspoken distance, I knew then that my constant vigour to convince him to talk to me worked out.

“Why don’t you drink one of your teas, you told me that it relaxes you right?”

“I would want to, but I already consumed the whole pack of it.”

“You sure did love it. Well, can I offer help? I know where we can find teas like those.”

“Really?’” He asked

I didn’t care if he was suspecting me as either the accomplice or the admirer, it didn’t matter.
“Yes. I can buy it for you.”

“Well if that’s the case. Okay and thank you.”

I was very glad that he said that. I was happy that though it still felt like there was still things to work out for him to be okay with me again, at least it wasn’t like last Monday when he first got angry with me.

---

We had our 5^th performance for the week. Unlike the last four performances, which we were just asked to perform, today and tomorrow’s performances will be followed by interviews.

It was a fun interview, as always, everyone was game at every question. However, everyone noticed that after the interview Leeteuk hyung was silent. Something seemed to be bothering him. Was it something we said? Or was it something that was asked to him?

When we reached the dorm, everyone else tried to talk to him, but he never spoke a word to anybody unless very necessary.

After we had dinner, I tried to talk to him. I said that the teas I ordered finally arrived. But he just nodded, not even looking at me, as he left his sit and went to his room.

I was distressed with his reaction. And I thought that I can finally be okay with him. I know he was the same with everyone that night, he didn’t’ talk to others as well, but the situation was different with us. He had reasons to fret me, since I did something troublesome two days ago. Besides I was getting paranoid that I was being transparent. I was afraid that he would see it in my eyes, in my lips or in my face, how I felt for him.

The next day, I saw him laughing with Eunhyuk and Donghae at the kitchen.

I greeted the three of them and they greeted back, except him. I hope I wasn’t imagining things. After we ate and prepared out things, I saw him waiting for us in the living room. Since I was the first one who finished, I waited with him at the living room. I gave him a smile, but then he turned around glancing at nowhere. I hope I wasn’t imagining things. After our performances, he hugged and congratulated everyone, but me. I hope I wasn’t imagining things.

When we were finally home and done with our dinner, he went to his room. I was left alone in the kitchen, thinking. I saw the pack of the tea at the table. Untouched. It was left there, the way it was when I handed it to him. I hope I wasn’t imagining things.

The next day, everyone was finally free from the schedules. It was time to rest after the rehearsals and six performances we had.

We decided to watch movies. While I was at the kitchen getting the junkies and preparing juice for the marathon, I heard them talking to Leeteuk, who was finally awake.

“Hyung! Are you going to watch with us?” Donghae shouted excitedly.

“Yes, I would love to.”

“Yey!”

Then I heard the footsteps coming. It was him. I smiled brightly at him.

“Good morning hyung! Want me to prepare juice for you?” I asked

 “No thanks.” He said emotionless, but it felt cold, then he left. I hope I wasn’t imagining things.

I kept on stealing glances at him, and at the middle of the movie, our eyes met. I smiled. He looked somewhere else.

“I won’t watch anymore.” He declared. He left.

I wasn’t imagining things.

The weekend was painfully slow. I tried not to talk to him. Why would I? I prided to myself.

---

Sunday night, we all used our disguise. We used our caps, jackets and shades. We went to a bar; we got an entire room for us.

We had drinks, and at the end of the day, we had drunks.

I have high alcohol tolerance, so I wasn’t really affected with what we drank.

Leeteuk on the other hand, drank too much, too much for his own limit. He drank more than anyone else drank.

I was the one who assisted him. I took him from his seat. I took one of his arms and placed it on my shoulder as one of my arm wrapped on his back. This was our moment. But no—this wasn’t.

“I don’t need help Kyu.” It sounded harsh but I ignored him.

“You do need help. Drunkard.” I murmured to myself.

---

He was barely conscious when we arrived home. When I placed him on his bed, he was already asleep. I sat beside him, in his bed for a while. I moved his bangs from covering his eyes.

“Why are you doing this to me hyung.” I said softly “Why are you being so rude to me? Do you know how much you mean to me?”

I couldn’t help but touch his cheeks. And I resorted to kissing his forehead, gentle as possible. As I stood, I looked at him for the last time. My heart went wild just in the sight of him. Oh how I wanted him to be mine.

“I love you hyung. I love you Jungsu.” I said to myself.

I left his room, teary eyed. I love him. I love him. I love him. I said it, I declared it. It is true.

Hi guys. Never had time to edit. Anyway what do you think about this chapter? I hope it has risen up your interest.

suggestions, violent reactions, anything? ^^ feel free. comment away.

I thank all the avid readers anyway. And all who have subscribed. Been busy at school.

Gonna post a lot on summer.

Oh, I hope there would be more KyuTeuk writers, it feels like this pairing is going on extinction. NOOOOOO!

Have a great day guys.