Leeteuk took my hand in his. My fingers intertwined in his. I could have never been happier. My heart fluttered. I was almost choking in excitement.

“Hey!” It was Hyukie hyung. He was asking me to move closer to the window of the car, to give him more space.

Suddenly those thoughts slipped away fast. I realised all of it were just a pigment of my imagination. It was my wishful thinking. I felt my chicks reddened, as I realized I was fantasizing about Leeteuk again. Now I was awake from my sweet daydream. Though I felt guilty for wanting Leeteuk, I still wished it was true. My daydream was true.

“Kyuhyun, stop daydreaming!”

I rubbed the smile away from my face. I guiltily asked “Who told you I was daydreaming?”

“Really?” He asked sarcastically.

“Yes, I was thinking about beating you in the game again. Though I’m getting bored of winning, I still find it pleasurable every time you cry in defeat! Ha-ha!”

“Okay, as you say so maknae. Though one day, I sure will defeat you.” Just when I thought he was satisfied with his speech, he added “So who were you fantasizing? Is it the girl we met last time at the club? Or was it me?”

“Shutup!”

---

I groaned. I was looking at my picture with Leeteuk that I just recently placed between the pages of my journal. I didn’t know what you call this feeling. I hardly knew if this was what you call crush. I also didn’t know if I ever felt the same way for him before his enlistment. Now that his back, suddenly, I figured out that he makes me feel dreamy about him. I wrote in my journal the date and the time. It was already 3AM, and I was still wide awake. I was troubled with these feelings. I never imagined I would feel this way about Teukie-hyung. I had a tiny bit of crush with Sungmin-hyung and even Heechul-hyung before, and now, I feel infatuated with Siwon-hyung. Does this also count as a crush too? Maybe. I hope so. But it just felt weird because I never thought I’d feel it for him? Or was it weird because it was so sudden? It was just a week. I mean he just came home from his enlistment. I tried to refresh our first meeting just after his enlistment. I decided to write it.

We were waiting for him happily, excitedly at the dorm. Everyone settled at the living room. Of course a day before Teukie was with his family, now he was waited by his second family, US.

The door opened. The other members then run onto him excitedly, they crowded him. I heard Donghae-ssi shouting Teukie’s name repeatedly, while Eunhyuk-ssi was clinging on him. I hardly saw him, since I was left at the corner where I was standing. I did not dare to meddle, since I felt like I don’t have the right to?, since I was the maknae. I’ve also thought that they were closer to hyung. But, I really want to hug him too, or welcome him too. Oh yeah, we’ve spent a short time during the TVXQ concert too, so it felt like I should let them take their time with Teukie. While everyone was celebrating, I heard a growl from Teukie. He sounded like he couldn’t breathe.

“Yah! Eunhyuk-ah, did you really miss me? Or you want me dead?”

Everybody else laughed.

“Sorry, hyung” Eunhyuk released Leeteuk from his tight hug. But as soon as Eunhyuk left, kangin replaced him and still giving Leeteuk a hard time to breathe; much harder, since Kangin was stronger.

“Kangin-ah, the hell. I miss you too guys, but is this the right way to treat someone you miss?”

As if everyone had the same mind, they all came to hug Leeteuk. Tightly, deadly. I giggled alone in my place. As soon as they broke from that group hug, I heard Leeteuk say “Kyuyhyun-ah, it seems that you never missed me at all”

Then the others moved to the side to give me and Teukie hyung a view of each other as we talk.

Finally, I had a clearer sight of him now, uncovered from the messy hyungs.

There he smiled. It was a very sincere, bright and sweet smile. It gave me a stung right into my veins. It made me feel nervous. Damn, he looked good. I missed that smile. I missed that voice. I missed that nagging sound coming from him. I missed every bits of him. It was all in my mind, and felt like I sound corny.

“I did.” I said sheepishly

“Then why aren’t you coming here?”

Then I realized that I looked embarrassed. “What I wanted to say hyung is that I didn’t miss you at all.” I tucked tongue out.

He laughed that very unique laugh that I missed so much. It was like music to my ears.

“You hadn’t changed!’ He said.

Then he came to me, and hugged me. I hugged him back, but deep inside I felt very warm.

Since that day, I kept on feeling butterflies in my stomach whenever he’s around. One time after having breakfast he came to me and asked me to wash the plates with him, and in all honesty, I was just drooling over him. Every time he’s not looking, I would gaze at him.

Yesterday, while we were having pictorial, I watched him during his turn. All my fantasies worked up again.

And today, if Eunhyuk-hyung hadn’t stopped me from that fantasy, I don’t know where it would be ending. Crazy thoughts.

If anyone, anyone would be reading this fic, I hope you do comment or subscribe so I'd know if I should be pursuing this story. Thanks. :)