“WHERE IS HE?! I CAN’T FIND HIM?! WHERE’S BYUN BAEKHYUN?!”

Chanyeol ran his hand over his face, “He was just by the table, Kyungsoo. I’m sure he’s around here somewhere-“

“I DON’T WANT HIM SOMEWHERE. I WANT HIM HERE. WHERE IS HE?!”

Jongdae sipped on lemonade as he watched Kyungsoo have a mental breakdown on one side of the room and Kai and Sehun practice on the other. It was amusing to see how one side was fuming and the other was annoyingly calm.

“I can’t believe Baekhyun,” Lay sighed, “How can he just run off like that?”

Chanyeol narrowed his eyes at his dimpled friend. Lay, in Chanyeol’s experience, had hardly ever sided with Kyungsoo during his ‘blame it on Baekhyun’ melt downs. Jongdae’s snickers made the taller turn to his friend. He watched as Jongdae pinned his eyes on Lay and chuckled.

“He’s so hopeless.”

Chanyeol nudged, “What?”

“What?” Jongdae blinked.

“Who’s hopeless?”

“No one?”

“What?”

“What?”

“No, I asked you.”

“And I’m asking you.”

“Damn it, Dae. Who’s hopeless?”

“When did I- oh. That.”

Chanyeol clenched his jaw, “Yes, that.”

“I meant Lay. Isn’t he hopeless?”

Chanyeol stared, “I’m sorry, I don’t see what you mean.”

Jongdae sighed and gave Chanyeol a look that made him feel a little dumb and a little offended. “He’s head over heels. Look at him, he looks so desperate, it’s hilarious.”

“Bro, what?” Chanyeol scrunched his brows.

“He’s looking for Hana, you giant dumbnut.”

Jongdae took another sip and Chanyeol blinked at his friend before turning to Lay and Kyungsoo; while the wide eyed boy had stuffed his ears with headphones and humming, Lay was sitting in the corner and sulking.

“Wasn’t Hana here just now?”

“Nope,” Jongdae gulped, “Baekhyun took her somewhere the moment she came in with Sehun.”

“Did you see her?”

“Yeah.”

“If I saw her, and you saw her, then how come Lay didn’t?”

Jongdae tilted his head a little, “That’s becase we met her outside. He’s been sitting in the room for the past half an hour.”

Chanyeol gawked at the sulking figure of his friend, “But…why?”

“He didn’t say,” Jongdae shrugged, “But I’m sure it wasn’t because he wanted to practice.”

-

“You done yet?”

“No.”

“Hana, it’s been ten minutes.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, idiot.”

“I’ll be out as soon as I can.”

“Take your time.”

Baekhyun leaned against the wall next to the bathroom door. She had dragged him all the way back into the school bulding and asked him to wait while she used the restroom. It didn’t take him long to realise that it wasn’t the call of nature that brought them here, it was her nerves.

“Baek?”

“Yeah?”

“Nothing,” Hana’s voice sounded strained, “Just checking.”

Baekhyun chuckled, “I won’t leave, Hanster. Relax.”

“How long until our turn?”

“Well,” he glanced at his watch, “When we left, the show had barely started. But I can hear sounds now, so I’m guessing the first group’s up.”

“Okay, and when do we go?”

“We’re fifth.”

“Crap.”

“It’s okay. Breathe and relax.”

Nothing but the muffled sound of people talking was heard through the walls. Baekhyun knew the first three groups were acts. What sort, he didn’t know, but he knew enough to know he wasn’t missing much. If he concentrated, he could hear Hana’s chants.

“It’s okay. I’ll be fine. Listen to Baekhyun, breathe. Don’t mess this up. I’m screwed. No, I’m not.”

He stood outside for another two minutes and suddenly realised that he hadn’t told anyone where he went. True, he was with the group when they met Hana but he was standing the closest to her while everyone else was lost in the crowd. Therefore, he was naturally the first one she grabbed. But now that he had been here for almost fifteen minutes, he realised how the others might be looking for them.

He knew he shouldn’t have left his phone in Chanyeol’s bag. Phoneless and jobless with only Hana’s chants and cheesy play lines to keep him company, he got an idea. Now he could only hope that Hana wouldn’t call for him.

Hana sat next to sink on the table and rocked back and forth. She had been preparing herself for more than half a month for this day. She was convinced that nothing, absolutely nothing would go wrong today. But here she was locked up in the bathroom with Baekhyun waiting outside as she tried to make peace with her anxiety.

Stage fright was pretty normal, Lay has it, so why couldn’t she? But then again, he only has it when he has to sing, he can do everything else remarkably well on stage, she’s seen it in the videos. But she couldn’t even bring herself to look at the stage when they entered the open area, let alone imagine herself perform on it. Hana realised she needed to get a grip long before she even dragged Baekhyun here with her. She didn’t even know why she brought him along. His arm was the first thing she clucthced and then it was all a blur.

She felt sorry for him. It had almost been twenty minutes and he has been so patient with her. Hana didn’t feel like crying, but even if she did, she’d hold the urge. Yuri did a remarkable job and she wasn’t going to ruin her (now) friend’s hard work. Instead, she was her knee and murmuring incoherent and empty reassurances. She was wasting their prac- Her eyes widened.

“We had to practice…”

.

Just as she was about to fist her hair, she heard a voice.

“Yo, Hanster?”

Hana relaxed a little at Baekhyun’s voice, “I’ll be out in a mintute. I swear.”

She could hear him chuckle outside, “It’s okay. I was just wondering that, since we’re losing practice time-“

“I’M SO SORRY! I’M COMING OUT RIGHT NOW-“

“Woman, chill. You don’t need to. I was wondering if I could just practice here. I mean, it’s just singing. You have the instrumental in your phone, right?”

Hana took out her forgotten phone from her clutch, her screen displaying a number of messages and missed calls. She forgot it was on silent.

“Yeah?”

“Good. Play it.”

Hana did, and after a few seconds, Baekhyun started singing. It felt nice, her nerves relaxed just in the first ten seconds. Though it only took a few more to have her eyes fly open because the second voice wasn’t supposed to be there.

“Kyungsoo?”

Hana jumped off the counter and opened the door, the surprise overtaking her anxiety, and was baffled to find everyone there. Baekhyun was smiling smugly and Kyungsoo was too (minus the smug). Chanyeol was sitting on the floor on the opposite wall and waving enthusiastically with Jongdae. What made Hana smile though, were Kai and Sehun dancing in the narrow corridor.

“Birdie told us you locked yourself in the bathroom.”

Hana looked over her shoulder to find Lay waving. hung open and she looked like a water deprived fish. Lay’s smile only grew. Baekhyun and Kyungsoo were still singing, Sehun and Kai were still dancing, and Chanyeol and Jongdae were still freestying in an odd manner, but Hana only stared at the person in front of her.

Lay was wearing a white button down with black skinny jeans. The sleeves of his shirt were half black but rolled up. He looked casual but not underdressed either. Hana could tell his hair were Kris’s doing; no way would the guy who owns only a comb would know how to spike his hair like that.

“You look awesome.”

Hana wanted to slap herself, hard.

Because you don’t stare at your ex and you sure as hell do not tell them they look awesome in a dreamy way. However, she had done exactly that and now she wanted to trip Sehun and hide behind him. Lay smiled; that shy, dimple inducing, heart fluttering smile. Hana blinked twice before looking back at Kyungsoo. He was smiling a bit too brightly.

“How did you guys know?” she asked as Chanyeol rapped.

“They’ll talk after their finished,” Lay said behind her. Hana, without looking back, nodded and walked to Jongdae. She wanted to sit next to him but he didn’t let her, “You’ll ruin your dress.” So Hana stood, listening and staring at her feet, very conscious of the side way glances she was receiving.

“Cry, cry, cry…”

Hana didn’t wait for the instrumental to finish and paused the audio. “Shouldn’t you guys be backstage?”

“Shouldn’t you?” Sehun shot from where he was kneeling.

“Touche,” Baekhyun snapped and turned to Hana. “I called them since I thought we could use this time for practicing. Smart, huh?”

“Very,” Hana nodded in acknowledgement. She took in everyone’s appearance once more. They were all wearing pretty much the same thing. The only difference was their shirts; though they were black and white (except Kai and Sehun, theirs were all white), the patterns were a little different.

In the midst of her staring at the chains on Kai’s pants, Kyungsoo had made his way to her.

“Hey,” he called and she turned, “Can I talk to you?”

It took Hana a while to register the concealed anxiety in her friend’s wide eyes. She nodded and gestured him to a corner. Thankfully, none of them followed; a good reason for that could be that Kyungsoo had already asked them not to follow. Which is why Lay watched with Baekhyun and Kai as the two talked in a corner.

“Are you okay?” Kyungsoo asked.

“Forget about me, how are you?”

“Forger about- how can I ignore you?”

“Because what I’m having is not even half as scary as what you’re feeling right now.”

Kyungsoo tilted his head challengingly, “And how do you know what I’m feeling?”

“Because,” Hana stared at him right in the eyes, “I can look at your eyes. You’re terrified, don’t even deny it.”

Kyungsoo didn’t, because he truly was scared. He had been having nightmares about this, screwing up and becoming a laughing stock was not among hte final memories he hoped to have of high school.

“You’re scared as well, it’s not just me.”

“I know,” Hana clapsed her hands. She instantly realised how she wasn’t helping Kyungsoo’s situation at all. This wasn’t what she promised him. She promised she’d support him, not fall weak.

“But look, we’re not the only ones.”

Kyungsoo raised his head, “Hmm?”

“Yea, we’re not alone.” She gently pushed on the shoulder so he could turn. Lay was helping Baekhyun practice some lines, filling in for Kyungsoo probably. Chanyeol, Kai, and Sehun were watching something on Jongdae’s phone when Hana called for Kyungsoo’s attention again.

“We have all of them. It’s not going to be just you or just me, it’s going to be us; all of us. And I think… I think as long as we know that, we’ll be fine.”

Kyungsoo bit his lower lip, “I guess…”

“We have our support systems with us every step of the way, we can do it. I don’t know about you but I feel a lot better now.” Hana smiled encouragingly. Now if only Kyungsoo could feel her new found optimism. She really did feel better. Consoling Kyungsoo, she had somehow convinced herself too. She still felt scared of course, but like she said, she wasn’t alone.

If they were all together, nothing could go wrong.

“Kyungsoo…?” Hana soflty called. His eyes were trailed on his feet and his hands were still clasped. She placed a hand on his shoulder which made him look up. She gave him a nod of encouragement. He stared at her for a while and found nothing but comfort and assurity. There was no evidence of fear in her expression. That allowed Kyungsoo to tone down his fear too. If she could do it, why couldn’t he?

“Thanks.”

“We should get going,” Hana said. Kyungsoo nodded and after a long exhale he turned with her behind him.

Lay watched Kyungsoo and Hana return, looking visibly better than before and wondered what they had talked about.

“All good?” Lay asked Hana, not really succeeding at hiding his concern.

Hana looked surprised, as if she wasn’t expecting him to talk to her. “Uh-,” she stuttered for a while before settling for a nod. She mentally punched herself again. She could only blame Lay for her condition; who told him to roll up his sleeves? Ban the guy.

A little confused but mostly worried, Lay nodded.

“We should be getting back stage now. It’s almost your turn.”

-

The walls vibrated as the music blared through the speakers. The fourth group were performing a dance number and the crowd was going wild. Anxiety that was previously reserved to only two people was now spreading to everyone. Even Jongdae, who wasn’t going upstage felt like throwing up.

“They’ll like us, right?”

Baekhyun scoffed unconvincingly at Kyungsoo’s worry, “Of course. Why wouldn’t they?”

True, why wouldn’t they? However, that didn’t loosen the knot in their stomachs. Hana felt sick all over again but she knew she wasn’t the one having it worst. One glance and Kyungsoo and everyone could tell how nervous he was. She kept glancing at Kyungsoo, giving him all her attention for two reasons: 1. He needed all the help he could get, and 2. If she dedicated her attention elsewhere, maybe all the sideway glances SHE was receiving would be less obvious to her.

Lay would say he’s slightly offended…

Okay. He’d be lying if he said that. He was highly offended.

Hana wasn’t paying attention to him at all. Not that he expected her to in the first place. But really, being ignored by your girlf- oh. Still, being ignored by Hana wasn’t very nice. He didn’t understand why she was stuttering around him; that only made things more adorable and awkward at the same time.

He wanted to tell her how pretty she looked. Hana had only ever wore eyeliner with a light gloss before. Her hair were never really styled but they still looked neat. Today, she looked totally different. She had makeup on but it wasn’t over the top; just the right amount. Her hair were loosely curled with a tiny, pink pearl clip. Her dress looked amazing. It wasn’t skinny, but not too loose that it’d look baggy. She looked ama-

“Yo,” Baekhyun nudged, breaking Lay’s zoned out gaze, “You okay?”

Lay had to blink a couple of times because he did not understand what Baekhyun meant with his question.

“Yes?”

“You’re not nervous?” Baekhyun raised a brow, “At all?”

Lay shook his head, “I don’t really…” and then it hit him. He was going out on stage in front of hundreds of people in a matter of seconds.

He was scared, how could he forget?

“Oh my God.”

Baekhyun nodded, “Yeah, oh my God. You zoned out again.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Your ‘neck-rub-shy-smile’ sorry doesn’t work on us.” Baekhyun said. “And, stop staring.”

“Huh?” Lay looked up to his friend.

“Dude, you’re making her conscious,” Baekhyun pointed at a fidgeting Hana, “Stahp.”

“I can’t help it, sorry.”

“You little , you aren’t sorry at all.”

“I just want to talk to her.”

“And you’ll get to. So please, I say this because I care, stop staring.”

Lay nodded under Baekhyun’s gaze. Baekhyun was right, he had to cut it down. Besides, he shouldn’t even have time to stare, he should be worried out of his mind. The music – to which Sehun and Kai were, somehow in sync, dancing – stopped. So did their breathing.

“Team five?” asked a boy in black clothes and a headset. He looked back and forth between their group and his clip board.

“U- Yeah?” Chanyeol gulped.

“Take your positions please. You’ll be on in three.”

The kid left without them. None of them could move until Jongdea had to push their backs, he had to push Chanyeol all the way. Kyungsoo and Hana stuck together, whispering pep talks and assurities to each other as if their lives depended on it. Lay, ignoring the minor sting, stuck with Baekhyun. Kai and Sehun were the only ones who looked comparatively calmer than the rest as they followed closely behind them.

“All right guys, huddle up.” Jongdae brought them all together, facing each other in a circle. In front of Hana stood Lay. It was just now when she noticed how worried he looked. Suddenly she felt guilty; maybe she should’ve spent some time calming his nerves too. But there was no time now.

“We’ve all been preparing for this for a really really long time now,” Jongdae started. “Though I have no part in the actual performance, I’ve been through it every step of the way and I can assure you guys, it has grown beautifully. Especially the last-“

“I want to say this,” Baekhyun cut Jongdae off. Surprisingly, he didn’t mind. “This performance brought a lot of us together. As Jongdae mentioned, we prepared a long time for this. That time is the most precious. So whatever happens, whether we mess up today or not, let’s focus on remembering the time we had and come back down with no regrets. Becase what we’ve become in those months is what counts.”

Baekhyun looked at Hana during the last part, and then at Kyungsoo who was right next to her. Kyungsoo brought his hand forward, “To us.”

“As a whole.” Baekhyun placed his hand on top Kyungsoo’s.

“For what we’ve become,” Hana placed hers.

“And to what we shall be,” Lay placed his.

Chanyeol reached, “Let’s always be together.”

“Even if time tries to rip us apart,” Kai put his.

“We will fight against the odds,” Sehun was next.

“Because family is what we are,” Jongdae closed.

“It’s so creepy how it kinda rhymed and we never even practiced it…”

They all laughed at Chanyeol’s comment. Everyone looked around at each other. Until a year ago, Hana wouldn’t have ever considered being here; together with such amazing friends and her brother. But here she was, and she was going to try her best that what they had said earlier would remain reality.

“Team five! You’re up!” the same kid shouted and they looked up.

“One cheer?” Kyungsoo asked as he lokoed at his friends. He earned nods and smiled widely.

“To us?” Baekhyun asked.

“To us,” Lay nodded.

At the count of three they cheered, shouting “To us!” at the top of their lungs and made their way up stage. But before they could expose themselves to the audience, Hana took one last opportunity to talk to someone.

“Hey.”

Lay halted. Hana stood on a step behind him looking nervous and confused.

“Good luck.”

He smiled, “You too.”

-

The stage wasn’t huge but it was large enough to place a piano, four mics (fourth for the guitar) and a stool. The remaining areas on both the sides were more than enough for Kai and Sehun. Lay had initially thought he’d look overdressed. It maybe just a simple shirt and skinny jeans but the aura wasn’t exactly entirely festive. But looking at the stage, he figured it wasn’t entirely out of place. The stage was grey with a lot of lighting. There were wintery props at the edge and a whole lot of crystal balls hanging over their heads.

The piano was placed near the end of the stage while the mics were in the middle. After the principal had introduced them, and Hana had taken her position, Lay could see that they had a clear view of her face.

Great.

Hana constanly clenched and unclenched her hands. A shout from the crowd made her look. Jongdae, Luhan, Kris, everyone, even Yuri were there in the crowd cheering for them. When Hana glanced at her friends on stage, she could tell they noticed them too.

Sehun was standing on Hana’s side. He glanced at her and gave her a thumbs up. She returned it with a smile. She then looked at Kyungsoo who was standing between Chanyeol and Baekhyun. His face was stoic but Hana could tell his anxiety was rising but every twitch of his fingers. Baekhyun and Chanyeol, after waving back at their friends, stared only at their feet. Lay was next to Chanyeol on a stool, fixing the strings on his guitar but Hana knew it was only a mean of distraction. He instantly looked up, and Hana, caught off guard, jumped a little in her seat. He sent her a lopsided smile. She hoped her smile didn’t look crooked. Kai was at a distance next to Lay. He too was looking at the floor but looked more conscious of his surrounding than the other’s did.

The lights went out and Hana did a mental count. They had rehearsed on stage yesterday; however, the feeling of performing in front of thousands of imaginary people was different from performing in front of real ones. She brought her hands up and the first few keys. Once the soft music filled the air, a spotlight came up on her. She could hear Sehun move, that meant Kai on the other side moved too.

Hana made sure to keep her eyes closed. She didn’t need the music sheet, she knew these keys by heart. The more she played, the more she felt her anxiety flush away. She heard Baekhyun’s voice and things started falling into rhythm. She didn’t feel scared anymore. When she heard Kyungsoo, she opened her eyes to sneak a peek. He had his eyes closed too, one hand holding the mic and the other on his chest. He looked calm, he looked fine.

With Kyungsoo’s voice, she could hear Lay’s guitar and Chanyeol’s voice lower behind Kyungsoo’s. Chanyeol was doing well but her main concern turned out to be Lay. He still looked nervous though his gaze was trailed on his guitar. As concerned as she was, she couldn’t do much but hope for him to be okay. The sound of Sehun dancing made Hana look. Watching Sehun do well, Hana wished to see Kai too. But looking at Kai would mean twisting her neck and that would look extremely inappropriate.

They were in the middle of the first chorus already and things were going extremely well. Hana, again, had closed her eyes as she played. They had been practicing this for months, it was like her fingers knew what to play even without her asking them to move.

The next thing surprised her.

No actually, it shocked her.

The line that was supposed to be sung by Baekhyun was not in Baekhyun’s voice. Hana had to look to be sure. She was blown away when she realised it was true.

Lay was there, on his stool, playing the guitar, and singing.

Singing.

In front of a live audience.

And he was looking right at her.

If Hana wasn’t automated to play these keys, she surely would’ve messed up. She was apparently the only one surprised because Kyungsoo and Baekhyun continued naturally, as if they knew this would happen.

And maybe they did.

So this is why Lay looked so nervous.

“When you smile, sun shines.”

Hana felt clog up and she looked back at the keys. Something about this whole situation made her feel sorry; she didn’t know for whom, all she knew it was she felt like she’d cry any second. The last thing she heard was Chanyeol’s rap and before she even knew it, she was playing the ending notes. Sehun, she could see, had stopped moving and kneeled in what was supposed to be their ending position. That’s when Hana knew that the song was over.

The lights went out and she felt two strong arms and a goofy chuckle in her ear. Sehun was excited.

“We did it!” He whispered and pulled Hana up. By the time the lights came on, they were already standing in a line. Hana was between Baekhyun and Sehun. Luhan’s constant calls to them had brought Hana back to reality. They smiled, bowed to the audience for being supportive and went down stage. They were all still a little starstruck and they could all feel it.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE WE DID IT!” Kyungsoo shouted.

“DO YOU HEAR THE CROWD?!” Chanyeol shouted, “THEY’RE STILL CHEERING FOR US!”

“I’M SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW! I LOVE YOU GUYS!” Baekhyun exclaimed and hooked his arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulder.

“You guys,” Hana started, “awesome job. I mean, I can’t believe this...” She held her head. Now that it was over, she really couldn’t wrap her head around it. But that wasn’t the only thing she couldn’t believe.

“Lay,” she called and he instantly looked up, “You- wow. Great choice.”

He smiled sheepishly, “Thanks.”

“How come no one told me, though?” Hana asked looking around and they all straightened. They exchanged secretive glances that Hana felt weird not being a part of.

“Guys?”

“I AM SO PROUD OF ALL OF YOU!” Kris barged in.

Hana knew this would now go nowhere. And really, it didn’t. Luhan, Kris, Suho, and Jongdae had ambushed them behind the stage. They were so loud that the staff had to ask them to leave.

Time flew after that. Luhan, Kris, and Suho promised to treat everyone to dinner and spent the rest of their time at the festival stuffing candies and playing games. Kai took photos, loads and loads of photos. It was after an hour of aimless wandering in the school ground that Lay approached Hana.

“Wanna go for a walk?” he had to shout over the noise.

Hana was hit by a bolt of confusion. She looked at the others, they were busy throwing rings into hoops to notice. She wasn’t really into those games anyway, plus she didn’t really want to say no.

Wouldn’t hurt…

“Yeah, okay.”

It was already dark, the stars were out and the moon looked like a half eaten silver cookie. They walked, first in silence but then slowly drifted into a conversation after they saw a wack a mole booth on their way. Lay was laughing, Hana was too, and for the first time in a while, they didn’t feel awkward. Just two friends walking and talking.

Friends.

They had left the tiny festival behind and were near the school gates. Hana didn’t have to complain about her shoes killing her, Lay figured it out on his own.

“I’m fine, really.”

“You look like a tortured dolphin,” he scoffed, “Sit here.”

Hana sat on one of the steps that led out of the school building and took off her heels. She could feel the blood flowing through her feet now.

“Feeling alive?” Lay asked.

“You have no idea,” she laughed wriggling her toes. Lay settled next to her and crossed his arms over his knees.

"Nice shirt," she complimented. Lay ducked his head.

"Thanks. Kris got it."

"No offense but i could tell."

Lay chuckled, "He went shopping with Suho hyung for gifts to give us. They ended up mutually liking these and thought it'd be cool if we wore these today."

"They look great on you guys so their idea was a hit."

Lay smiled and bobbed his head. They sat in silence for a while as Lay stared at the school gate ahead of them.

“Can you believe we’ll never see this place again? We won’t be students here anymore.”

Hana put her heels by her feet, “It’s not like we’ll NEVER see it again… but yeah, it kind of to think we won’t be students here anymore.”

Looking back at the building, Hana was struck with many memories; both sweet and bitter. She chuckled, “I remember the time when I hated coming here. This place was like a nightmare.”

Lay’s smile faltered a little, “And now?”

“Now?” she glanced at him, “Now, it has some of my favorite memories. For a long time I didn’t have anyone I could go to. My aunt was there, of course; but there were still elements missing. My senior year here gave me everything I wanted. You guys, especially.”

Lay looked up as Hana continued, “I should really be thanking you guys everyday. You did more for me than you guys know. And I can’t even begin to explain how thankful I am of Sehun and Luhan. They put up with a lot of stuff because of me. I don’t think I can ever- Oh God. I’m sorry. I’m rambling.”

Lay smiled, “No, no, it’s okay. Carry on.”

“Nah. I should shut up.”

“I like listening to you talk,” Lay said and Hana fixed her gaze on her hands.

“And I like it how you’re opening up to me again. I thought you wouldn’t do that anymore.”

Hana smiled weakly, “Why wouldn’t i? We’re friends, right?”

Lay sighed. Yeah, friends.

“There’s something I want to say.”

Hana looked toward Lay, his change in tone surprised her.

“That day when you came over, you said a lot of things. You said what you felt, what you thought, what you wanted to say; your side of the story.” Lay turned to look at her, “I think it’s only fair I get to tell you what I think too.”

Hana didn’t speak, just waited for him to continue.

“The way I acted that day, it wasn’t an on spot thing. Thoug, I’m guessing you know that already. My brain was messed up and I said a bunch of crap I shouldn’t have. Hana, I’m sorry.”

“Lay, you don’t have to-“

“Yes,” he firmly cut her, “I do. I need to. I should’ve apologized to you the very second I said all that crap. If not then, then the moment I found out how everything was bogus. I’m sorry, I should’ve trusted you more.”

“Yuri did a pretty good job so I understand why you’d believe her,” Hana hurriedly added, “But Lay, its okay.”

“Hana, really, it’s not. And then when you said all those things, that you weren’t good for me and I deserved better and all that. I’m sorry I didn’t stop you then and there. I should’ve told you how wrong you were. I should’ve told you I don’t want a break up. I should’ve stopped you. I should’ve made sure you drank your coffee. I should’ve told you to stop talking because I didn’t want to hear what you were saying. Everything you said made me realise how much of an idiot I was. And I’m sorry, Hana. I’m sorry for being a level A idiot.”

Hana didn’t know what to say. She was at a loss of words. The moonlight hit Lay’s face at all the right angles but his features were contorted into a frown. He didn’t look happy. Hana didn’t like him looking upset.

“It’s in the past…” she trailed after a lingering silence, “And I don’t mind. I understood your anger, so it’s okay.”

“You don’t mind?” He raised a brow, “So you’re saying you’re doing well after the break up?”

No. But he didn’t need to know that. She couldn’t even bring herself to lie so she stayed quiet.

“Are you? Because I’m not.”

Hana looked at him. He didn’t look angry or frustrated, just really desperate.

“The second I closed the door after you left that day, I regretted everything. I regretted shouting, I regretted not believing you, I regretted not telling you how I still love and care for you. I regretted not asking you for another shot.”

Hana stared with teary eyes into his determined ones.

“I don’t plan on regretting anymore.” Lay moved so that he’d face her completely and said, “Hana, I’m asking you for another chance.”

-