C hapter. 24

Regret

Update!!

Hope you enjoy, dear readers~

Baekhyun's POV

     "Oh, Baekhyun! You're back! How--" Before Kyungsoo can say anything more, i run to the bathroom and locked myself in it. I stand infront of the mirror with my teary eyes, "Argh! Damn it!" I shout in frustrated before punching the wall beside the mirror, hard. "Ya! Byun Baekhyun! What the are you doing there?!" Kyungsoo shout from the other side of the door, he keep knocking but i ignore him. "Open the door right now, you stupid !" Kyungsoo start cursing at me to let him in, yet i remain silent.

     I grab my toothbrush and slice my toothpaste on it, i start brushing my teeth with tears running down my eyes. I brushed my teeth, again and again. I cried silently as i run out of toothpaste. I stop brushing my teeth but the feeling of Minah's lips still remain there and i can't help it but cried more. It's not that i hate Minah that much, but it's because i love Soo Ra yet i kissed Minah. I feel disgusted of myself, i feel so dirty.

     Wanting to do something, yet couldn't do anything, i hate that feeling. I made a mistake again and again. And i thought do i have any choice but to date Minah? Because if that's the case, Soo Ra will hate me and she won't cry because of me anymore, then in other side Minah won't get hurt. I stop crying as i look at myself in the mirror, "I just need to be patient and ignore my feeling, then everything will be alright." I muttered to myself as i stare right to my own eyes, i can see how fragile i looked. "From now on, noone will get hurt anymore. I just need to sacrifice my happiness so everyone will live a better life." I murmer as a tear slip down my eye.

     I just need to be patient, because my fate has been fixed. I'll die in the age of 20, and i could do nothing to change it.

     I walk out of the bathroom, lifelessly. "So, i guess you choose Minah?" Kyungsoo raise an eyebrow at me while sitting on his bed, i just stare at him for a while before i change my clothes and try to sleep. But Kyungsoo being a so-understanding-jerk-friend called EXO to come. "Well, hello again, losers. Mind telling me your reports?" Kai cooed as he take a sit beside me who was trying to cover my head with my pillow that Luhan keep trying to pull it off me. "Get away!" I yelled when Luhan success on taking the pillow away from me, he smirk in victory.

     "So, you left Soo Ra for that girl?" Chanyeol grin brightly as he walk closer to me, i gulped. "Hehe, you big boy. You've grown up to choose, eh?" He start patting my back as i turn paled, he patted softly as i flinch. "Oh, so now you're scared?" He start patting harder while grinning widely at me, "Ouch! Stop it!" I yelled as i hit his hand away, he rolled his eyes. "Whatever, you really don't deserve her anyway." It hit right on my heart, it stings.

    Kai suddenly laughed, "I deserve her better than him, right yeol?" He winked at Chanyeol who stare at him with uninterested face, "None of you deserve my perfect sister." He scoffed as Kai laugh die down, "tch, sister complex. But whatever, i'll get her. I told you about it before right, Baek?" He smirks as i lower my head, ashame of myself.

     "Do whatever you want, Kai." I muttered in hurt, then Chanyeol patted my back hard again, i choked. "After dumping her, you're going to give her away like she's your unused thing?" He smile again and i could feel his dark aura around him as i gulped and shooked my head. He just scoffed before standing up from my bed and walk out of the room. "Look like he doesn't want to be in-laws with you anymore." Kai smirk teasingly at me. "Shut up, i don't care anymore. Just go away. All of you! GO!" I yelled lastly before taking my pillow harshly from Luhan and cover my head with it.

     I could heard EXO's sighed and that's when i start crying silently, "Do whatever i want? That's a good idea though. Farewell, loser!" Kai said lastly before i feel a weight in the end of my bed up and heard his footsteps getting away. "I don't know anymore, it's you choice though." Kyungsoo muttered before sending all of them out and turn off the light, "I think you're born stupid from the start." He said lastly before he sleep, leaving me crying in regret.

     The next day i went to the hospital lifelessly, "Oppa! I want to eat an apple!" Minah smile cutely at me as i nodded and start cutting it for her, "Here." I muttered as i hand her a slice of it, "Feed me." She grin and i do as i was told, i feed her. "Ah, it's so sweet." She smile as she chew on it, yet my expresion remain straight, all i could feel was regret, nothing else.

     But the toughest part was on school this morning, i saw Soo Ra talking to EXO. She was just meteres away from me, but it feel so far away. I keep glancing at her way with my hurtful eyes, i miss her already. Surprisingly, she turn around and our eyes met for a merely secon before i turn away and start talking with other girls randomly. I'm sure she watched me, because her stare is burning my back. I turn around and was right, she stare at me before she turn away and continue talking with Kai. I could heard my own heart cracked.

     I sighed and walk straight to the canteen, i need something to eat. I start picking salad when i hand slightly touch with someone's hand, i turn to look and found Soo Ra with wide eyes. I gulped, i open my mouth to say something when she back off and it hurts me, am i that disgusting? She frown hurtfully at me, with everyone looking at our way, "Don't touch me." She said coldly before walking away with her tray to EXO's table, they where looking at me with cold eyes and i just sighed. I could see Kai smirk on me yet i ignore him.

     I walk lifelessly to the corner and eat by myself, again and again i want to appologize to her. All i want to do is to say sorry and kneel infront of her, begging for her forgiveness. But now i know i can't do that, because i had done something fatal. I want her to trust me, but i know i don't deserve it. In the end, i'll only let her hopes down and make her cry again. But why can't i just appologize and kneel infront of her? Maybe everyting will be fine after that. But why can't i?

     Oh, i know. It's because i can't live past the age of 20.

Your's POV

     "Oh my god, it's so hot today!" I sighed as i stand under the air conditioner, Yura sighed too. "Agree, it's so hot today." She said while her ice cream. We remain silent for a while before Yura break it, "So, something did happen with Baekhyun and you, huh?" She raise an eyebrow, i shook my head as she rolled her eyes. "Don't lie, if you're not in a fight, you probably will start blaberring about him to me now."

     I remain silent as i sit on my bed, "And i heard from my classmates that you shook his hand away in the canteen this morning." She continue throwing bombs at me as i turn to glare at her, "I don't care about him anymore, he's a weakminded and a liar." I murmer in hurt. "He even have a girlfriend now." I said lastly as tears running down my eyes. "What? So that's what he told you the other night? That's why you ignored me?" She frowned as she sit beside me. I nodded as i sobs quietly.

     "She's prettier than me, she's feminime while i'm here being a monster. Why did it turn out like this? This's unfair." I started crying the hell out of me, yet the pain won't leave. Yura hugged me and patted my back softly, "I'm here with you, let it all out. You've been strong for too long, Soo Ra." She whispher beside my ear and that make me cried harder than before.

     Suddenly someone knocked on the door and Yura when to open it for whoever it is, "What are you doing here?" Yura's eyes widden when she saw Kai standing infront of the door, "Why? I can't be here?" He ask casually before inviting himself in, Yura closed the door after sighing. "Hey, Soo Ra! Wait, you cried?" He gulped when he saw me trying to stop my tears.

     "What are you doing here?! Get out! I want to be alone with Yura!" I yelled, but Kai remain silent before a smirk appear on his lips. "Is it okay? But another one come to visit you too, i saw him sneaking here though." He said and both Yura and my eyes widden, "Who?" I muttered until a realisation hit me and my eyes widden, i walk to the window before openning it and lean my head foward. I turn my head and saw Baekhyun leaning on his back on the wall.

     I stare at him for a while before he frown and turn to look away from me, "Stop staring, i just come here because i saw Kai walking here. I'm just worried that he'll turn into a ert." He said and i stare at him coldly. He's the one who choose Minah yet now he's worried about me? I scoffed, "You don't need to worry about me. What ever i do with him is none of your bussiness, right? Just worry about that Minah." I muttered coldly, but deep inside i was waiting for him to appologize and tell me that he love me. But maybe it's my our destiny to start hating each other. "Oh, really? Fine then." That was his answer.

     We remain silent as the cold wind blows, "Whatever. I'm going back." He said lastly before walking away with his hands on his pockets. "Tch, that guy is plain stupid." Kai said when he saw Baekhyun walking away, i turn to glare at him. "Shut up and leave already!" I yelled, but he just scoffed. "And now you're being mad at me?" I remain silent before Kai pinch my cheek, i yelped. "What are you doing!?"

     "Messing up with your face." He grin and i punch his arm hard, it's his turn to yelped. "What the , Soo Ra! It's damn hurt!" He hissed while rubbing his arm, i don't know why but i start laughing at him. "And now you laugh? Geez, do you have your period today that make you all moodswinging?" He joked and earn a punch from me again, he yelped as i smirk at him. "Serve you right." I grin.

      Kai smilled back, "You look prettier when you smile." I don't know how this happened, but i blushed at his compliment. "S-shut up." I turn to close the window, then i remember about Baekhyun again and i stop smiling. "Whatever, now go. Yura and i want some sleep." I said lastly before both of us push him out of our room, we locked the door when he's out. "Ya! How could both of you do this to me!" Kai yelled playfully on the other side of the door and i can't help it but giggled with Yura.

     When Kai dissapear, Yura turn off the light and both of us lay on our bed. "Stop thinking about Baekhyun, Soo Ra ah." She suddenly said and i sighed. "I can't, Yura. I loved him since we were kids." I sighed lifelessly, tears treaten to fall again. "He hates me now, Yura. I don't know what should i do, i don't know how to hate him." There, i start to cry. I heard Yura sighed, yet she doesn't stop me from crying.

     "Then why don't trying to move on to Kai?" She said suddenly and i choked on my own spit, "You're kidding right? Why would i fall for that wierd guy?" I rolled my eyes as i wipe away my tears. Yura raise an eyebrow at me, "The truth is you know it right? At first he was joking, but now i think he was being serious." She muttered and i turn silent as i thought about it. Soon, tears roll down my eyes more and more. "Of course i know that, Yura. Because he's always here when i'm hurt." I muttered.

      I continue crying, "Should i really forget about Baekhyun? Is this really our end?" I sobs, yet Yura remain silent. She sighed lastly, "You know he have Minah already, right?" I didn't answer her but cried to myself as i nodded, Yura understand me and told me to sleep. Slowly, i went to my dreamland with tears rolling down my eyes.

     Little did i know, Baekhyun was watching from afar. "Stupid Soo Ra, it's not only Kai who think you're pretty. I also did. But all i could do, was hurting you." He frown hurtfully before walking to his dorm.

     That's when the next day, rumors appear between all of the students. Baekhyun was walking to his classroom when one of his classmate yelped in shock, "Are you ing kidding me?! Park Soo Ra and Kai is dating?!!" The girl yelled but closed when she saw Baekhyun, his eyes widden, not believeing what he just heard.