My confession

after a few hours, soojung finally woke up. she rubbed her eyes sleepily and turned to see jongin, sleeping while sitting uncomfortably beside the couch. soojung smiled upon seeing his innocent expression. she stared at him, feeling happy because finally they're good again.

"stop admiring my face." jongin said without opening his eyes.

soojung gasped, looking at him in disbelief look. "how did you know????" she yelled at him. "and excuse you, i didn't admire your face at all." she snorted.

jongin smirked, opening one of his eyes and staring at her. "you wouldn't smile and kept staring at me like that if you didn't admire me." he paused, leaning her body closer to her "when i was sleeping."

soojung rolled her eyes. she reached out her hand, forcing to open both of jongin's eyes. "stop acting y in front of me, Kai."

jongin chuckled upon seeing what soojung did. he opened his eyes and stretched his stiff body and turned to see her again. "well..good morning, sleepyhead."

"morning????" soojung's eyes widened and she looked outside. it's dark and quiet. she quickly took her phone and saw that it's 6....pm.

"yah!" she yelled at him and hit his back. "i thought i really slept that long!"

"gotcha!" he stucked his tongue out and laughed like a kid.

jongin climbed up the couch and slumped his body onto it, sitting right next to her. soojung didn't say anything and kept checking her phone.

"have you called my mom?" she asked.

"already. she said she will come once you call her." jongin answered. "call your mother now. you need to go home and take a rest, again."

"i'm tired of sleeping! my body becomes weak if i keep sleeping and doing nothing." she complained. "beside, i need to do something before going home."

"what's that?"

"spin a yarn." she turned to him, looking at him directly. "we need to talk and solve this matter, buddy."

"i'm not a dog!" jongin protested.

"what?" soojung frowned, didn't get what he said.

"why did you call me buddy?? that's dog's name!"

soojung mentally slapped herself and she really wanna hit her head repeatedly to the wall upon seeing his best friend's stupid statement.

"buddy is friend in english. oh my.." soojung shook her head in disbelief.

"i'm sorry california girl, i'm korean since fetus." he defended himself.

"whatever." soojung shrugged. "back to topic. now, mind to tell me what happened with you?"

jongin was silent for a moment. "ladies first." he said.

"me?" soojung pointed at herself.

"yeah you." jongin nodded. "if you tell me the truth, i'll do the same."

"truth?"

"yeah truth. you've been hiding something from me for these years. but i don't even know what and why."

soojung smiled weakly. "so you realized that."

"what happened?" jongin asked, couldn't hide his curiousity.

"umm..i don't know where to start."

"hmm..what about that night?" jongin suggested.

"that night? hmm..what do you want to know?"

"what happened between you and taemin?" he asked carefully.

"he refused to answer my call, or reply my message. just like you." she said, making jongin felt guilty.

"sorry.."

"that's okay." she smiled. "should i continue?"

"yes please.."
"hmm..okay. so i already told you the reason on the phone, right? i'll make it shorter, so he suddenly appeared in front of my house and apologized and hugged me, saying he didn't want to lose him and he asked me to promise him to be loyal and never cheated on him." she explained.

"and then?"

soojung was silent. she avoided jongin's gaze and drifted her gaze somewhere else. she sighed before continuing her story. "and then, i made a confession about something." she lowered her voice, suddenly looking uncomfortably.

"what confession?" he asked.

soojung didn't answer or responded. she kept staring blankly at one point, making jongin worried.

"soojung-ah, are you okay?" jongin asked her worriedly because of her sudden change.

"i told him about his hidden agenda." she blurted out.

"what?" jongin looked confused.

soojung turned to him, looking at her best friend with tears in her eyes. "he never love me, jongin." she said. tears rolled down in her cheeks but she let it. "he never love me and see me as i am."

"soojung-ah..hey..what are you talking about?" jongin reached out his hand and wiped her tears with his thumb.

"he loves someone else, jongin-ah." she sobbed "he always does."

soojung hid her face in jongin's chest, crying her heart out after holding it alone for years. jongin kept patting her back and asking her to calm down. "sssh..don't cry. hush, soojung."

"i-i didn't know what to do jongin-ah. when i found out about how he tried to love me as his first love, i felt...awful. then i decided to pretend that nothing happened. i always thought that ignorance is bliss but the truth is....it makes me even more miserable. i finally love him but i found out about it. i--i.." she choked because of her tears and started sobbing again.

"hush, soojung-ah. it's okay..it's okay..i'm sorry.." jongin whispered. he closed his eyes, feeling a sharp pain in his chest. he let his best friend with her, the one he really love but at the end, he just hurted him and made her like this. he always prayed for their happiness because both of them were people he really closed with. but he never knew that actually, they tortured each other by hiding something from each other.

a relationship without truth.

"soojung-ah, you can't hurt yourself like this. you deserve to be happy." jongin controlled his emotion very well, not knowing to show how upset he's at that time.

soojung faced him. "i told you, i love him." she simply said, but making jongin's heart hurted even more.

"i know..but.."

"jongin.." soojung cut off. "you don't know how it feels to love someone that much, even when that one hurts you, you refuse to go because you just need that person."

'i do!' he screamed inside his heart, but actually saying nothing.

"and you don't even blame him or mad at him?" jongin asked her.

"i can't be mad at him because of some reasons." she drifted her gaze away.

"because of love reason?" jongin said with sarcasm

"one of them, but not the main point."

"then what's the main point?" jongin asked.

soojung turned to him and smiled. "trust me you don't want to know."

"i do." he insisted.

"you don't." soojung shook her head. "enough with my story, now your turn. tell me why were you mad and upset with me?" she quickly changed the topic.

"answer my question, first." jongin insisted, but soojung refused to answer.

"no. that"s final." she said firmly. "now, answer me. honestly."

"i can't." jongin sighed.

"you've promised, jongin." soojung reminded him. jongin was silent and didn't say a word for a while, making soojung curious.

"if you're having a hard time to decide where to start, you can explain the reason why you act like jealous boy." soojung said jokingly.

"jealous?" jongin frowned.

"yup. it looks like you're upset because you see me with someone else." she poked her tongue. "don't worry, even when i have a lover, you're still my favorite best friend ever!"

jongin laughed upon hearing her words. he laughed for a while until soojung frowned deeply because she didn;t know that her joke was actually that funny.

"why did you laugh? you sounded creepy." soojung commented when jongin finally stopped.

"trust me, you don't want to know." jongin said, copying soojung's previous line.

"eh! copycat!" soojung protested. "just answer me, babo. i'm curious."

"i don't want to." jongin shrugged.

"keep. your. promise." soojung hissed, grabbing his collar playfully.

jongin touched soojung's hands and made her loosened her grip. he shook his head. "don't. you don't need to know."

"jongin-ah.." soojung groaned in frustration. "i told you my deepest secret and now you're being a cheater and unfair and jerk for hiding yours! wait, is that even a secret? i just asked your reason."

"my reason is a secret, soojung." he replied calmly.

"i want to know! this is unfair!" soojung whined.

"are you sure?" jongin asked.

"yeah!" she nodded.

"even if something would change?"

"umm..nothing will change." soojung said.

"don't be so overconfident." he shrugged.

"try me." soojung crossed her arms.

"it's all your loss if anything happened after this." jongin smiled weakly.

"what do you mean?" soojung suddenly had a bad feeling about this secret thingy, but it's too late if she back off now.

"soojung-ah, do you want to know my deepest secret?" jongin looked at soojung in her eyes, making her stunned.

soojung nodded. she didn't know why she held her breath.

"my deepest secret is i love my best friend since the first time i saw her in the music room. and yes, i was upset because i was jealous to see her with someone else."

Author's Note

so, here's the double update special for you.

and i have an important annoucement for you:
this is the last update before my examination which starts on monday for 1-2 weeks. I probably won't update until my exam finishes but if i have time, who knows i'd update?

if you have songs that related to taekai/kaistal! You can recommend it to me and maybe, i'll use it or i'll have an idea for the next chapter~

thank you so much for reading this story and i hope you enjoy it!
I love you so freaking much you ♥

p.s: if you have a question, click  HERE