Hana was being selfish. Terribly selfish. Was she aware of it? Yes. Would it hinder her? No. Because at this moment, it didn't matter to her. Not asking Luhan whether he himself wished to see his family and friends again was ignorant. She was ignorant of his opinion, his will. But, Hana reminded herself of the balance between gain and loss. There was a chance that Luhan would become sadder upon seeing them again. However, there was also a chance that he'd become happier. Or at least, lighter. Because being stuck felt heavy; Hana knew that very well. She needed him to proceed. He didn't need to make up with them. But he needed to move on. He needed to put an end to this chapter of his life. This chapter that had dragged for five years. That would continue to do so, if he didn't let go. If he didn't let go of all the guilt and regret.

Luhan himself, in his current state, would definitely decline her idea. He would insist that he didn't need to see them again. That he didn't want to see them again. That they didn't mean anything to him anymore. That things were over.

But Hana could see, the reality looked different. Maybe, he didn't realize it in his denial. Or maybe, he just refused to realize. Maybe, it was refusal because of fear. Fear to be disappointed.

It was an assumption. It was vague and uncertain, as assumptions usually are like.

The only clear thing was that what he said was wrong. But everything Hana assumed to be the reason was vague.

However, Hana was willing to take the risk. She was willing to be drowned in the waves of guilt, if her plan turned out to fail. If her plan turned out to cause Luhan more pain. Because she wouldn't be doing this, knowing it'd be only Luhan's pain. Because she was only willing to put his well-being on the edge, knowing that she'd fall with him.

Was it reasonable?

Maybe not. Maybe, that was just Hana's twisted reasoning to make herself feel better while doing this. The twisted – yes, even blind at some point – way of thinking that made this selfish act possible. Because her love for him wouldn't have made it possible. Because her love would never take on the risk of him being in pain. Because it was her selfishness that made this possible.

It was idiotic. To think that being in pain as well would lessen his. But then again, wouldn't mankind be idiotic then?

Misery loves company, eh?

Hana took a deep breath as she stood in front of the door of the Lu's house. Three days had passed ever since her last visit at the hospital. Ever since her idea had emerged. Ever since she had begun to research of Luhan's family and friends. She had chosen her only free day from university and work – the day she'd usually use to visit Luhan – to buy a train ticket to the city his family was residing in.

As expected, it was easier to find out the whereabouts of his family. In fact, it had almost been too easy. And all that due to his father's job and reputation. His father was the founder of a big lawyer's office in a relatively big city, Daegu, in the centrum to south. A lawyer's office offering Chinese-Korean service. Lawyers and interpreters were employed to make overseas trials possible as well as trials for foreigners living here.

It was a very known office and the prices were one of the reasons Hana had never bothered to think about lawyers in the first place. Luhan's family had to be fairly wealthy. That information had caused a certain realization to dawn upon Hana.

Just how many coincidences had occurred for her and Luhan to meet? He, someone coming from a wealthy and well-educated family with Chinese background (that was completely new to her). She, someone of such average background with a family in which education seemed to be a foreign subject.

Would they have ever met, if not for her accident and his illness? If not for her to be discovered and on the way to a competition only to get involved in a car accident. If not for him to have run away and be diagnosed with leukemia.

To her, it was wondrous that they even crossed paths. And therefore, she was even more grateful that all those coincidences had caused this person to appear in her life. This person, whose hand had gently led her back to reality after finding her in the chaos of her mind. Who had caused all those wrong notes and strange sounds to merge into one beautiful melody. And therefore, she was even more determined to return this kindness. Her way might be vague and risky, but she had already begun. And she wouldn't stop halfway.

As the door in front of her opened, Hana armed herself with confidence and determination. Or the lack thereof, when she was met with the stern face of a man of around fifty years of age. “What can I do for you?” Hana could detect a slight accent – probably due to the Chinese background. This had to be Luhan's father. However, there were no similarities between him and Luhan at all, other than their height maybe. Luhan had soft features, whereas the man had sharper ones. Smaller but fiercer eyes, stronger jaw.

Hana bit hard on her lower lip. Even after mentally going through it again and again, she found this situation to be impossibly difficult to manage. How was she going to make it clear that their runaway son suffered from leukemia without having them send her to the asylum.

“Uh,” she mumbled, not knowing how to begin. Should she mention Luhan's name first or not? Would they immediately close the door upon hearing his name? She didn't want things to fail before they even began. Maybe she should go with her one version of lying to them that she was collecting signatures for the costs of Luhan's treatment to decrease. However, Hana had no clue as to his hospital fees other than the fact that it had to be high, but that was a given.

“Shi shui?” A female voice could be heard and Hana blinked at the foreign language. That had to be Luhan's mother.

The next second a woman – around forty-five or maybe a year younger – appeared in the door frame and Hana knew that this was Luhan's mother. They l