That afternoon, I woke up in my oh-so-cliché room. Physically and mentally tired even though I slept for hours after that nerve-wrecking incident in the mall. I think I lost my spirit now. And I don’t feel like doing anything.

 

The curtains were back to its original position, successfully covering the entire window. Even the blower was placed on its rightful arrangement. Even my backpack was empty and I definitely knew that my important things were back too. Like nothing had happen awhile ago.

 

I switched off the lampshade and proceeded to open the main light instead. When I heard the click, I spotted a white folded paper located on my bedside table. The fax, it’s here.

 

Staring at it first before taking few steps only to stand beside it, I hesitantly picked it up and unfolded the paper. It took time for me to digest all the words that were typed in. I can’t believe my old man do have haters.

 

If the contents are real, then it’s true that they want me dead. But really Kris, do you have to say that in front of me? How stone hearted he is. I can’t bear standing near him nor take a glimpse of his frigid face. After what he have done? I don’t care if he saved me back there. He’s an amateur in scaring the hell out of me.

 

I crumpled the paper and threw it away from my sight. Trudging to exit my bedroom, I was halfway in the staircase when I almost crash into someone carrying a tray of food. Of course, great luck. That flaxen hair again.

 

Kris lifted his head and looked at me. I absolutely gave him that uncomprehending stare until I let my eyes traveled to the food then back to him. He didn’t move. Just doing the only thing he knows, to stare.

 

The space was too narrow and I just want him out of my way. But how? I know very well that I can’t win in his staring contest since he’s pro at it compared to me. No choice, I’ll speak.

 

“Are you that giant for me not to have enough space to go down?” I asked displeased. And just as I expected, he continued to stare. Seriously? What’s there to stare? Doesn’t he get tired seeing my always annoyed face?

 

I briefly closed my eyes before heaving a sigh. Suddenly, I grabbed the tray from him before saying “For me? How romantic. I’m not hungry at all. You can have it instead. And don’t tell me about you having concern for me because I honestly didn’t see that when you aimed that gun to me. I prefer starving to death than submitting myself for you to kill me.”

 

With that, I flipped the tray intentionally. Kris slightly widened his eyes and about to catch the fallen food but failed to. I smirk evilly at him when he looked back with that furrowed thick brows of him.

 

And the least action unexpectedly happened, Kris bent down picking the food even though it was already spilled in the stairs and placed it back to the tray. He stood up with a worried face while I just crossed my arms. Glancing between the food and me, he said “Everybody will be eventually alert when you’ll try to leave this house again. So don’t ever think about it. You can have my food at the kitchen. I’ll take this.”

 

He got ahead of me, carrying the tray, to his room before closing the door. I was left confused. What was he talking about? Aish! Don’t he dare act like he’s the victim here. Such an actor indeed!

 

Frustrated, I went fully downstairs. Turned to my right and strode into the living room. I slumped myself to the couch and growled loudly. I don’t wanna live like this forever. Just let me out robot people!

 

I grabbed a pillow beside me and immediately buried my face, not forgetting to stifle my own shout in there. Then I heard some objects being moved which made me to pull away from the pillow abruptly.

 

Seeing Lay placing another set and tray of food on the table located in the middle, I relaxed and sat properly. He glanced at me before smiling “Here, feed your stomach.”

 

“Thanks but I’m not hungry.” I denied.

 

“I wasn’t referring to you. I was referring to your stomach.”

 

I looked at him before frowning, “What’s the difference? It’s still a part of me.”

 

“There’s a great difference, Amber. You see, our stomach has its own breathing or life. Even if your brain command you to say those words out but your stomach there, you may not know, but it begs to differ.”

 

Bewildered at his explanation, I could only blink. So Confucius had finally reborn into this young man’s body? No, please don’t.

 

“Therefore, everything in this world has life. Try to understand and see it within yourself, Young Mistress.” Lay continued and I have to correct him again, “Amber is fine. You forgot?” I asked.

 

“Ah, my apology.” He quickly replied. I nodded in response.

 

“But you might be wrong Lay.” I started while advancing myself to the food and slowly tasting it before actually eating it. I could say that he’s waiting for me to continue in my peripheral vision.

 

“In this world you are talking about, there are some cases which are purposely created to have this cruel and stone heart like that of giants and frigid face and…” I stopped when the words I said came out almost automatically and looked at Lay right away.

 

Lay grin this time, showing his set of white teeth. Of course with those dimples he got. I quickly snatched the glass of water and drank it, wiping my mouth using the back of my hand after. He sat and faced me.

 

He then spoke, “When I said ‘see it within yourself’ I really mean like use the honest side of you. Use the one who can see the inside of other living things. Not the everyday eyes that we are always using.”

 

Getting uncomfortable by the way he lectured me because frankly speaking, never did my old man lecture me. But I admit, Lay got some point here. I just don’t want to show him.

 

“Yeah right. Uhmm is this conversation going anywhere?”

 

He sighed and I just stared at him. Clamping his palms together and about to say something but interrupted in a second.

 

“The food are well budgeted. All the needs we have in here. We can survive eating once in a day but Kris gege can’t eat now since you are eating what suppose to be his.” Tao appeared with a serious look.

 

“Tao, where’s the manners? You are speaking to our Young Mistress. Don’t forget that.” Lay said when he stood up attentively.

 

The look Tao gave me was something creepier than Kris’s. Repeating the words he just delivered in my head, I stood up too. Encouraging him to speak at me that way. “Oh Yeah? Is it my problem now? Frigid person like him do eat? I thought his eyes were munching the whole planet whenever he stares and frowns and yeah that.”

 

“If you just didn’t flip the whole thing and be more considerate, at least that’s what you can do. It will help a lot.” Tao retorted back. That raised the irritation in me again. Thanks Panda eyes man.

 

“Really?! You can understand what he feels yet you don’t have the slightest idea about mine! So don’t you dare act like I should pity the hell out of him.”

 

Lay looked at me then to Tao in total panic before going to his side “Stop it now. Know your position.”

 

“Because you are a brat that never cared of anything other than yourself.” Tao said silently but reached my ears precisely. I snapped out of it and soon shouted at him.

 

“What the hell would you feel if a bullet past your stupid head that may take the once breath you had?! Huh?!  You will never know the feeling of it since you are trained to hold that freaking gun. Why am I arguing here anyway? Stupid ill-mannered bodyguard like you wouldn’t understand it.”

 

“You don’t know what Kris gege went through.”

 

“Do you think I care?”

 

“So ungrateful.”

 

Lay keep on shaking Tao’s shoulder to stop him but he didn’t give in until Xiumin, Chen and Luhan appeared in the living room. Luhan went to my side before bowing his head.

 

“Please forgive Tao. He’s just not into himself right now.”

 

I frowned and said, “Then teach him how to get back on his shoes.” Turning away from him, I walked passed through them while shooting one last glare to that Panda eyes man and exited the room.

 

Tao yanked himself out of the group and went to the kitchen instead, leaving Luhan, Lay, Chen and Xiumin behind. The left members just stared at each other.

 

Chen sighed and patted Lay’s back, “Give our maknae a little time. Don’t worry about him. He can definitely handle himself. He’s really sensitive, isn’t he?” Lay nodded while Xiumin stretched his arms out offering for a hug but Luhan ran quickly to those arms instead.

 

“Hey! It’s not for you! It’s for Lay. Get out of my arms.” Xiumin struggled making Luhan hug him even more tightly and chuckled. Chen wanted to join in. Unfortunately, he was pushed by Luhan. Showing that he just want to hug their precious Bao Zi.

 

Lay smiled but briefly hugged Chen anyway. That made Chen smiled cheekily. The four members pulled out of each other when they heard the loud slammed of a door upstairs. Xiumin sighed this time.

 

“Poor Kris. I think I’ll cry a thousand of Bao Zi when I’ll be the personal bodyguard of our Young Mistress. I think I can’t handle that kind of attitude.” Xiumin said then pouted. Lay slightly hit his head.

 

“Idiot, that’s why you weren’t assign to her from the first place. We don’t want to assist someone who isn’t capable of handling his personal client you know.”

 

“What?! But I’m still well-trained too! Don’t underestimate me you guys.” Xiumin puffed his cheeks more which made Luhan pinched it.

 

“Then explain to us why you’re the hyung but named to Agent 6 and got the lowest rank from the chart of the most outstanding Agents?” Luhan teasingly asked before running away from the living room to save his precious prince-like life.

 

“LUHAN! Better hide somewhere safe this time or I’ll gonna skin you alive!” Xiumin warned in Cantonese, merely understood by the members. Luhan laughed then replied in Korean, “You don’t know what you are talking about Bao Zi. Stick to speaking in Korean or I will forever make fun of your accent.”

 

After that, the two began to chase each other. Not minding themselves with those tuxedo suits they were wearing. Chen excused himself and accompanied Tao in the kitchen, leaving Lay alone.

 

 

 

 

~Kris’s POV~

Staring at the tray of unorganized food in my bed, I blinked at it for every 7 seconds. Back leaning in the tinted windowpane while letting the sun set in the background, serving the source of light to the room.

 

Hands in both of my black slack’s pockets. Wondering what method should I use at this very moment to distract myself from hunger. Unintentionally, my thoughts went back to Amber.

 

I didn’t mean to traumatize her nor aim that gun that almost slices a strand of her hair at the top of her head. What I felt that time was no other than fear. Fear of not being able to save her on time, fear of watching her die in front of my eyes, fear of failing this mission, fear of leaving the group aftermath, fear of blatant reactions from the highest personnel but most importantly, fear of losing her.

 

This way I’m feeling, did my members feel it too when they were assign to be a personal bodyguard? Or just because she’s young among all the clients I’ve taken care off. Not to mention, my first female client.

 

No specific answers to these questions I have in mind.  I can only act on instincts. Therefore, I’ve done the most foolish action at that time. I just want her to understand but she couldn’t. Doing that in order for her to grasp the situation was successful yet she despised me now.

 

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