I can’t keep my eyes away from Sehun without my brows furrowing. It didn’t even take a minute long before he glanced over, squinting to see if his discreet action was about to be blown by whoever will witness it. This made me impulsively stuff the can into my lips, lowering my eyes and drank the contents in one gulp, soda bubbles frizzling on my tongue, tasting my own hasty moves against it. I choked distastefully.

 

“Slow down. Hey, you okay?” Henry reached out to caress my arm, concern latched on his voice. I coughed and nodded after seconds of gaining my normal breathing. He shook his head with an amused chortle, “May I ask what possessed you and gulped that soda in one go without even thinking? Hmm?”

 

My face felt warm, ashamed because of idiocy. I was nervous alright, nervous that Sehun might catch me eying him and his suspicious action in a result where choking myself was essential. I wiped my mouth with the back of my palm, clearing my throat and offered a small laugh to Henry, “I’m good. It’s just that, you know, there’s this stupid voice in my head challenging me to gulp soda and see if I can tolerate bubbles.”

 

Henry arched his eyebrows, silence overtook milliseconds. He blinked several times, comprehending the excuse I said, staring at me disbelievingly, “Should I laugh or worry about what’s got into your head? Tolerate bubbles? Really?”

 

“Oh, come on man. Give me a break.” I stood up, setting the now empty soda can on the ground and crushed it with my right foot. Childish smile formed on my face after it appeared to be a defeated piece of tin under the weight of my powerful stomped.

 

Sometimes I think of the soda can as problem. If only it was problem, then anytime I can stomp on it and will remain defeated under my control. But life is full of miseries and pile of stories. We should be seizing the moment of the present, not giving much thought to the untold future and moving on from the past. But why do people tend to focus more on the devastating events? Why do we let ourselves dwell on the past, groom for the future and forgetting the middle, which is the present, like we can’t grasp present the way it always come and shove itself for us?

 

Because we always regret actions we thought we won’t and live for the rest of our lives bringing life to our What if’s.

 

“I’m tasting the bubbles normal. There’s nothing special in it.” Henry wrinkled his nose while inspecting all sides of the soda can, all the while gently rocking himself on his skateboard.  I shrugged and titled my head to stare at him, “Yeah, nothing special.” I admitted hollowly.

 

Suddenly, I remembered Sehun and his silhouetted companion. I side glanced to where he was. I became alarmed when the spot was vacant. No shadow of his remnant can be seen. How did he disappear without me noticing a bit of his moves? Tricky young man.

 

I mentally scanned the open area for a good hiding part, where those two can communicate without being interrupted or seen. And my eyes landed on the public toilet nearby. Hideout found. Excitement incited all throughout my system but I need to calm myself before everything gets out of hand.

 

Acting was always the troublesome part. I admit, I’m barely convincing whenever I’m impatient to leap small steps on reaching my main objective. I am always stubborn and petulant at times like this. But I must resist all those pessimisms if I’m enthusiastic to find out what this Sehun guy was skeptically doing and, of course, I want to know if it was him he was talking to.

 

 I need to know.

 

After placing the skateboards beside the basket on the bench, I told Henry I’m going to the Ladies toilet. We went for another minute of debate about it though. He insisted for the short ride from here to my house so I should just bear it for awhile. Of course I refused. That wasn’t the reason why I wanted to leave. I’ve got my own personal business to deal with. He was persuaded after my reasoning out of not withholding the need to release. It was an awkward act to be honest.

 

With a wave of hand, I scurried towards the toilet. The structure was small with low ceilings, just enough for maybe two to three persons to enter by turns. Ladies and Men’s toilet were only separated by the created divider of bricked wall in the middle. Sign boards of faded rosy for ladies and navy blue for men hung up on the exterior of the two wooden closed doors, barely distinguishable.

 

The toilets itself were surrounded by another fence made by bricks, higher in comparison, built for securing the inelegantly design set for public toilets. Well, what do I dream of? We’re in some old segment of Beijing. In this place, privileged government officials won’t confer money to some downplay project like public toilets. Instead, they’ll just cover it up with a wall fence. How artistic.

 

I walked few steps and leaned through the Men’s door. Silence. No hushed voices or even the faintest of all whispers, I hear nothing. Strange. Where did they go if they weren’t here? I pressed my ear harder on the concrete door. I was greeted with the same result. Did they sense that I was aware? After I choked myself?

 

No time for doubts and such depleted countenance of guts. I pulled away and decided for an alternative plan. If they weren’t inside…outside the wall fence seemed logical. Because abundant tall trees and Mother Nature spread like wild fire on the other side of this park. Which reminded me, why didn’t I think of that earlier?

 

Once I sidestepped around the wall fence, false hopes started to ignite within my expectation. I don’t know what I want to see or what I want to know. I don’t want to name them. It will only lead to disappointment, mostly. I stayed glued to the wall, making it my only guide to the darker side of the place as I took careful steps.

 

The moonlight didn’t quite reach that part, which fabricated the perfect location for some rendezvous to happen. Soon, I saw branches and the shadows of the swinging leaves by numerous trees. Wind almost howling at me when I hesitated on my move. What do I intend to do? What do I really want? Answers? What kind of answers? My palms still on the wall beside me, cold air lingered on my face and whole figure.

 

I shook my head and persisted to go on. With every careful footsteps, my knees and hands began to shake, difficult for me to walk ahead. It almost appeared like I have no goal in this purpose. Why am I even doing this? But I shouldn’t be bothered, right? All I have to do was just sneak on Sehun and that companion of him. Just for verification, I guess.

 

And then I halted behind when I heard it. I heard low voices. But it sounded too much of murmurs along with the rustle of nature’s noises that I was unable to form the words in my head. As if they were cooing a toddler that doesn’t understand real talk. I frowned and extended a bit of my neck to grasp the conversation. The pounding of my heart drummed faster. I breathed in and breathed out, allowing myself to cool down and stay still.

 

From my view here, I can see Sehun, again with his back facing me. He looked like talking to no one but I am not fooled. I know somewhere in that darkness, was a person. A person I know and, maybe, desperate to see. I have to do this. It’s now or never.

 

Scrapes of sneakers louder under my weight, I darted for a sprint towards them. Sehun whipped his head around, dilated pupils and a slacked jaw. A pale face and pure astonishment rendering his uncalled expression. I don’t blame him. It was impossible not to be. He expected his actions were smooth enough not to be discovered. And yet here I was, shoving him to the side to reveal a mirrored expression of—

 

“Tao?”

 

I was confused. No, I know deep down I’m not. The right term for that is, I was disgruntled. I know it in myself. Disgruntled, because I am very much expecting some blonde hair, thick eyebrows, sharp nose, chiseled jawline, and most of all, that inscrutable but fixed stare. Those physical characteristics don’t belong to black fringes and feline eyes.

 

What do I expect from submerging and acting this entire know-it-all attitude? I am being incredulous. Never knew seizing an opportunity may also lead to despondent result until on this moment, present moment.

 

“What are you doing here?” Sehun grabbed my left arm, turning me so I could face him instead of Tao. I swatted his hand away, “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be post guarding? Doing something effectively related to your task? And you,” I pointed a finger to Tao, “What business do you have? Are you—”

 

Alone, was what I meant to ask but I swallowed it for myself. At least keep my desperateness and fallacy of hope inside me for my own good and own reputation. I cleared my throat when Tao blinked and raised an accusatory eyebrow.

 

 “I came alone.” He has read what’s on my mind or what’s clearly drawn on my face. Which is which, I don’t know. Tao is an Agent after all. I have the right to feel embarrass but still hoping for acting impassive in front of him to be worth of effort.

 

“I don’t care. I’m asking what business you have. If I may recall, Agent from another group don’t just show up during patrolling hours. Especially if it’s held like this, secretive and dubious.”

 

“Young Mistress, we should go back.” Sehun attempted, looking around vigilantly of any signs of another presence. I didn’t tear my glare away from Tao, too immersed and eager to know anything from him.

 

Eight months. I’ve lived eight months without seeing EXO-M and I thought I can move on from them. But just having few words from Tao brought back memories. Brought feelings about a certain frigid face with his authentic voice of a leader he has always been.

 

I remembered that time where Tao and I were not really on good terms. When I was so reckless and flipped the tray of food Kris was carrying to deliver to my room. In result, I ate what supposed to be his and Tao was the one who voiced that out with a flare of annoyance against my bratty behavior. If he didn’t do that, I wouldn’t have known any of the many sufferings of Kris.

 

“You just happened to know few things. Sehun and I are friends. My visiting to a friend is none of your concern, let alone our conversation. And I see no reason to provide you explanation to this matter.”

 

Of course, Tao was just as tenacious as I am. That may explain why we won’t really be the best of all people when joint together. We can’t even communicate without spitting harsh tone and words. He’s got some point and I don’t know where I stand my rights at this. They were just assigned to protect me and be assured about my safety, remind myself again that I am not under Tao’s or EXO-M’s security measures anymore. I am no boss to their private lives.

 

But then, it came to me.

 

“If what you are doing is not against any law of your job, I presume you should be flaunting your pretty face to the rest of EXO-K. Not only to your good friend here. And if being cautious around the two of you is not obvious enough, then please do the honor to wrack your brain for a legitimate excuse, because I am calling…” I leisurely turned to Sehun, “your leader.”

 

Both of them exchanged a troubled look and I am quite proud of myself from being advantageous amongst us three. The left corner of my lips tugged upwards. I have to suppress my upcoming laugh of triumph for preventing myself from derailing the atmosphere.

 

And if being arrogant was reasonably a good show that pays the price, I continued my act of superiority and skipped on my steps, calmly moving away from them with a wicked smile. I may be using an upperhand in this situation; nevertheless, I just want to claim my rights as well.

 

“W-wait!” It was Tao’s fingers that circled around my forearm this time and a smirk involuntarily crawled up my face. I wiped it off and replaced it with a questioning expression when I am, once again, facing Tao’s displeased one.

 

Sehun was frowning beside him, thinking about something that lost himself into while folding his arms over his chest. He wasn’t bothered by what’s going on. I’m guessing he was mentally listing alibis for his future benefit. He looked like a guy who will save himself out of the problem first before anyone else. But really, I don’t know him better to judge him that fast.

 

“Now what? I thought we’re done. I am just going to announce your appearance because they have the right to know. I get it, old friends miss each other. So why don’t we get to gather you all and have a happy reunion? I will gladly lend a hand.” I had a pleasant tone and a provoking smile but a menacing intention. And Tao wasn’t dumb not to catch that.

 

“What do you want?” He narrowed his eyes, successfully bringing an intimidating aura, before pocketing his hands. I shouldn’t be swayed by it.

 

“Why are you here?”

 

Tao’s mouth twitched, like he was contemplating whether to say it or not.

 

“I am here...” He dropped an abrupt sigh, “to obtain information. That’s all you should know. Whatever the information is, I am not allowed to tell. Respecting authorization.”

 

“Oh really? Care to explain why are you only obtaining information from Sehun and not—”

 

“My team and EXO-K are not really, uhm, how should I put it? We’re not really friends. Look, we are just complicated beings and only specific persons are willing to cooperate with each other for the sake of information, for the sake of our own group. In my case, or in our case,” He gestured himself and Sehun, “we are one of those people who chooses care for the group than inflating our minds with some vague unspoken competition between two teams.”

 

Tao didn’t look like he was lying even though his words weren’t the answers I wanted to hear. Even though I want to dig this information he was talking about. He was paying more extra care to his choice of words. A sign that the information itself is vital enough for him to be this precise with thought.

 

“How important is this, information, exactly?”

 

“It’s a life.”

 

I stood there, staring at him and the anxious Sehun beside us kept on walking around to check our surroundings. Life. How ambiguous. It still irked me but for some reason, instinct told me that I should be knowledgeable about this matter, that I am taking a big part of it.

 

“We wasted too much time. They’ll notice something’s up. We need to get back.” Sehun declared and Tao nodded in agreement, patted Sehun’s shoulder and about to run through the darkness when he was hindered by my clasping hands. He looked at me, taken aback.

 

“I’m…I’m coming with you.” I stated. I don’t know what possessed me. Throw the ‘keep my desperateness and fallacy of hope inside me for my own good and own reputation’ to the East China Sea.

 

I just want to see him.

 

His eyebrows met on the middle, confusion taking all over his face but I didn’t miss the fleeting thought that passed right into his eyes. A thought that silently matching with my statement. But it disappeared when Sehun was shaking his head, disapproving, and said, “We can’t, because…Suho hyung. He’ll receive much burden. I…I don’t want…No, we can’t.”

 

Tao lowered his eyes and gently removed my hands from him. He gave a curt nod to Sehun, “He’s right. You are under their protection and if anything goes wrong, imagine a much bigger rivalry from two teams. It won’t be pretty.”

 

“But I—”

 

“Young Mistress, although it’s not evident, I am pleased to meet you again after these months. See you soon.” He winked, flashed a sincere smile and disappeared.

 

That is Tao who has had developed within eight months. That is Tao who I am not in a good relation with, but no matter what, stuck to his words and considered his job as his first priority. That is Tao who caught me in his arms when I was intoxicated by the deceiving juice on their very first night of protecting me and that is Tao who treasured his team members’ feelings the most, to the extent where he can risk himself to reach where the desired information is.

 

I realized that, that was the longest conversation I had with him. Maybe I could learn from people around me. Sure, we, humans, are complex beings but we could learn from each other. We could help each other because that’s what we do. That’s what we are made for.

 

“Is everything alright?” Henry was standing few meters away, glancing between me and Sehun. The latter looked paler upon Henry’s unexpected discovery. I chose to use my infamous on-the-spot lies to save both lives.

 

“Henry! Nothing big deal. Though, It did get a little stuffy inside that toilet and I need somewhere with real air to puke on.” I clutched my stomach and faked a repugnant scowl of face, “Here with all this green and scenery, it helped me a lot. You’re right. That soda you brought is gross, no offense.”

 

“No offense taken. But you could’ve said so. I’ll take you to the nearest hospital if you’re still hurt.” He approached me immediately, protectively wrapping his left arm on my upper back and the other landed same on the hand that was placed on my stomach. I felt a churning sensation all over me.

 

I am a horrible person. Lying to her bestfriend about these things. Why can’t I just trust him? I don’t have any answers to that. I only know that it will only cause chaos if too many people know such happenings that should at least rest to where it already was.

 

I slightly jabbed him with my elbow, “Don’t overreact. I’m stronger than you think.” And laughed half-heartedly.

 

“Come on, it’s late. I’ll drive you home. Uncle Liu will hang my head if I don’t return her daughter before midnight. You don’t want a souvenir of my precious head somewhere in your house, do you?”  

 

“That is one hell creepy and disgusting. You want puke on your shirt?”

 

“Hey, my ’s on the line. You can’t possibly jeopardize me too. Uncle Liu is already terrifying.”

 

“Sort of. Okay, I’ll agree just for your sake.”

 

The night was spent like that. We left the park with me in Henry’s vehicle. They complied when Henry suggested privacy for bestfriends. No bodyguards on the backseat but they kept a closer distance in following behind, with their own vehicle, of course.

 

Throughout the ride, Tao’s last sentence kept on repeating inside my head. It has got me an indirect answer to my longing question. Fortunately, it has ended. All I have to do is wait and be patient yet another question has been made; What will I do then?

 

If I’ll be able to come face to face with Kris himself, what will I do then?

 

“Young Mistress, although it’s not evident, I am pleased to meet you again after these months. See you soon”.

 

See you soon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~Kris’s POV~

My watch says 00:00, then struck to 00:01. I ran in a speed of thunder around the massive field of trimmed dry grassland, gun in right hand. The moment I spotted the flamboyant rectangular box that was about my width horizontally, I ducked behind it and crouched, breathing heavily.

 

I tried catching my breath, but it was no use especially when visible presence of multiple persons positioned themselves in every corners of the field. They were determined not to lose the sight of their opponent, so do I. We have the same objective, only the strategies differentiated us from one another. I say, I refused to be compared to such bold juniors.

 

“We are vastly outnumbered.” I conceded, holding my left earpiece before checking the bullets inside my gun.

 

One left.

 

 “Right. Because last time I checked, we never wage a war to a group of less than twenty members. What makes this different? Zero.” Chen replied as a matter of fact over the earpiece. I rolled my eyes to myself.

 

What Chen said was utterly correct. We’re consisted of six members and it will always result to six fighting over fifty persons. Some may think that we were merely struggling to survive instead of fighting over opponents. But that was a lie. Not my intention to boast, but talented six persons in a solid team of defense and attack, what more do they want us to prove?