---

"What.. us?" LuHan immediately shifts his look to the other side of the beach opposite Sehun's spot. He doesn't want the younger to see anything in his eyes. Maybe, he thinks, he's transparent enough for Sehun to tell that he's still hoping about loving him back, although he didn't formally inform Sehun about it yet. So he looks away. Sehun smiles at himself, looking down to the moist sand beside him and starting digging his index finger and writing something to the surface. "Us," he mutters like it is the most wonderful word ever created. LuHan looks down at the sand where Sehun is writing. "You and me.. Us, hyung. I missed us. I missed this feeling.. you beside me. It feels so good."

LuHan takes a deep breath and wishes to not to let his eyes well up. His heart beats so heavyly and rapidly that it already hurts. He wanted this to hear from the younger's lips for so long now. It feels like the world stops for them. Only for them. For him and Sehun.

"There wasn't a time that I wasn't thinking about you." Sehun continues. "I never would forget thinking about you. Everything about us keeps on replaying in my head. I'm thankful, hyung, that we're still the same."

Sehun moves closer to LuHan to the point that their arms brushes each other's and leans in to rest his head to the older's right shoulder.

Smiling, Sehun says, "I missed your scent too."

With that, LuHan laughs. He suddenly feels that this is already enough if ever there isn't really a chance. Everything seems like paradise, because of Sehun. "Yeah? You can steal one of my used clothes later. I'm giving you the permission."

"That's not it!" Sehun pouts. LuHan looks down to see the younger man's expression. And there, their gazes locked. "You" Sehun says. "I missed you, hyung."

LuHan can't get his stare away from Sehun's. He feels like Sehun's eyes are digging their way down to the innermost core of his heart, and soon he never can't contain the feelings he's hiding. "Me too."

-

LUHAN'S POV

I already want to tell Sehun what I really wanted to say ever since I started feeling this way. But then thinking abouth the truth, it's enough to kill me and never let me have the guts to tell him what I feel about him. And it hurts like hell.

"You know," Sehun says, lacing his fingers to mine. I know it's some kind of like a show off, but that's how we really were before. Everything was fine.. comfortable, until Kai appeared. "I want you beside me always. Do you remember what I told you before?"

Sehun doesn't know how much I missed holding his hand like this, how his fingers fit perfectly into mine, and how much I want to make this last forever. Just us, no other people, third party, or any hindrance. Just us.

Sehun's hands feel so warm and so smooth. I can't stop myself from playing with his palm and fingers. He didn't complain anyway so I continued doing it.

When I finally noticed his silence from my dreamy thinking, I looked down to the sand beside him.. his writing. And I almost said I love him when I saw it. Hell, I feel like everything in me loosens up.

"Sehun?" I whisper, clasping my hand in between his left hand.

"Hmm?"

"Can I write something too?" I ask, pointing to the moist sand in his side. He side glances it and gives me a small nod.

I don't know if it's right to do it, but I'll try.

Sehun and LuHan

That's what Sehun wrote. And hell, it gave me a great impact right here.. in my heart.

I lean in for a bit. Sehun lets go of my shoulder and I quickly wrote a seven letter word. That's what I really want, for certain.

Forever

Sehun and Luhan Forever

Sehun smiles warmly and pulls me back for him to rest his head against my shoulder. "Can we make that?" he says. "For eternity? Forever?"

"Sehun?"

"Yeah?"

I need to let it out now. Really.

"Sehun, can I.. can I kiss you?"

Sehun quickly looks up at me. Glancing at my lips, he smiles.

-

"Sing for me first." Sehun smiles, tightening his grip to LuHan's right hand. He doesn't care if anyone sees them; holding hands, resting his head to LuHan's shoulder, smiling, talking. It is all just natural and he found it so comfortable. Even if Kai sees them, Sehun doesn't care, a bit though, LuHan is different in his own way toward the younger. And honestly speaking, it's deeper.

"WHAT?" LuHan exclaims way too loudly, making Sehun startle and sit straight. "You want me to sing then you- Is that a favor or something?"

"Please?" Sehun pouts, moving his face closer to LuHan. LuHan, on the other hand, gets too distracted from the younger's lips that instead of looking somewhere not 'there', he stares at it and gulps overdramatically. He blinks several times before looking away.

"D-don't do t-that again!" LuHan stutters. Sehun just chuckles, moving a bit away.

"But I always do that! We have had several times before that I got much closer than that!" Sehun replies in almost a yell. But it sounds too funny to LuHan's ears so he laughs. "What?"

"Nothing." LuHan forced himself to stop from laughter. "What do you want me to sing then?"

Sehun furrows his eyebrows, pouting and then lays his head back again. "Anything. You know, based on what you are feeling right now." he pauses. "Wait! You're in the music club, you should know what to do already."

LuHan smiles sheepishly, tracing invisible circles in Sehun's knee. Sehun snaps it, but then based on LuHan's nature, it comes back.

"What I feel?" LuHan repeats.

"Yeah. Like, the feeling that is abundant for you right now."

"The feeling I feel the most right now?" LuHan repeats to himself. "I have! That song kills me though. Always."

"Kills?"

"Yeah, because that song seems like connected to me." He looks down, "And everytime I hear it, there is always this person that keeps on bugging in my mind. And you know, it kills me. It kills me that I can't show him the better me."

LuHan fits his fingers to Sehun's own, staring absentmindedly infront of him. The world seems to turn in slow motion. He feels like he suddenly became a deaf, and the only thing that he can hear is Sehun's breathing beside him. Near him. He wants this to last for eternity. He wants Sehun, and only him.

Without further thinking, he opens his mouths and starts singing his heart out. His heart that belongs to Sehun.

Miss you, when I close my eyes that's when you're near

I kiss you, but I know that I'm dreaming

it's not fair

And I can't help but cry everynight

When I'm weak and you're not by my side

I just want to hold you in my arms

I think of you each day, now we're apart

And I just want things back the way they were

Find the way back to your heart

Without you, i don't feel the same since you went away

I need you, and I just want you back here with me

And I can't help but cry everynight

When I'm weak and you're not by my side

And I just want to hold you in my arms

I think of you each day, now we're apart

And I just want things back the way they were

Find the way back to your heart

And I just want to hold you in my arms

I think of you each day, now we're apart

And I just want things back the way they were

Find the way back to your heart

I miss you

LuHan slowly opens his eyes when the last word of the song finally came. 'You'. His heart hurts more than anything. It hurts him more that now, right at that moment, he's singing it to him.. beside him.. while holding Sehun in his arms. He takes a breath, because now, as much as he doesn't want to, the tears continuously escapes through his eyes. And he can't stop it. Everything inside him breaks down. It's killing him, too much.

LuHan feels Sehun's hands tighten in his own. He slowly faces the younger, "Se-"

Just when LuHan turns to face Sehun, Sehun at the same time looks up. And that's when LuHan gets one of what he suddenly wants.

Their lips met, making LuHan stop from speaking. His eyes went wide open, his eyes that are full of tears, shocked of what is happening. His lips and Sehun's. It is perfect. Though LuHan couldn't close his eyes at that moment, Sehun did. It's like Sehun did that on purpose. Maybe, because that's his favor. But LuHan didn't expect that this is what he was talking about.

LuHan tries to move his lips away, but Sehun grabs his hand, making him not to. Sehun kisses him for a bit, just at the same time LuHan responds in. LuHan feels breatheless. His heart suddenly wants to explode. He wants this. He wants all of this, but-

LuHan half-heartedly pulls away, quickly facing the other side. "You're making this hard for me, Sehun. You don't know how-"

"I know. I know about all of these." Sehun replies, staring straight at LuHan. "I know that it's me. You can't hide anything from me, hyung. I've known you for too long now. You're transparent, just by the look in your eyes, the way you breathe, the way you talk, the way you act, I know everything."

LuHan stands up, furrowing his brows in anger. Sehun knows everything. He knows what he's feeling, yet he acts like he doesn't know. He pretends he doesn't know. LuHan is a fool, a stupid. He wants to scream, he wants to jump off from a building, he wants to.. just surrender everything.

"And that's why you're taking advantage from all of it?!" Luhan yells weakly, tears started to run down his cheeks again. "You knew my weakness from the start. You knew that it is you. That's why you're doing this? Don't you know that you're killing me?! Sehun, you're killing me! Yet, I am here, oblivious about everything you know!"

Sehun stands up, reaching for LuHan's hand but LuHan moves it away. "You!" he lets out a shaky exhale, "Y-you're making this hard for me, too."