“.”

Not even sure if the memory was 100% true, Sungmin got up from the couch and left his apartment without saying anything to Ryeowook.

It took him 30 minutes to get to Heechul’s place, his embarrassment, anger and confused state all the same since when he left.

“Heechul! I need to talk to you.” Sungmin said as he knocked on the door. “I really need to talk to you. Now open the door.”

Heechul opened the door, clear expression of ‘I can’t see you now’ on his face. “This is not a good time, Sungmin. I told you I’d see you soon.”

“No, no, no,  no, this cannot wait.”

Heechul sighed, leaning against the door frame. “What is it?”

“I remembered something and it isn’t good and if it’s true, then you lied and I’m not cool with that okay?”

“Seriously, what are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about last weekend. You told me nothing happened but I remembered that I did something bad.”

Straight away, Heechul knew what he meant. He was finding it hard to figure out what Sungmin thought about the whole situation which only made him feel worse. He had no idea how to get out of this one. Maybe he would just say that Sungmin thought wrong. It wasn’t like he was going to admit the truth was right. That would risk their relationship.

“You didn’t do anything bad.”

“Then why do I remember… “ Sungmin paused, not able to say what he wanted to say. “why do I remember… you know… doing something…” he looked away from Heechul, his eyes finding comfort in the ground. “… doingsomethingual.” Sungmin’s words came out fast, but Heechul understood. Unfortunately.

Heechul stepped outside of his apartment and closed the door behind him. Pushing his fringe out of his face, he looked up at the ceiling, confused about his thoughts.

“Okay… so we did do something.” Heechul looked down at Sungmin.

“Oh my god… I am just some y thing for you aren’t I?”

“What? No! I never said that.”

“Then why did you let me do that?”

Heechul brought his hands up to his face to rub his eyes. About to defend himself again, the door opened behind him, revealing a short, pretty woman. Blonde hair, brown eyes. Sungmin had already made his assumptions.

Heechul quickly turned around, telling her to go back inside.

“Who’s this?” Sungmin pointed at the woman. “Did you sleep with her?”

“Yes, I mean no, I mean I did ages ago, why are you so angry all of a sudden?”

“Is she why you can’t spend time with me this week?”

“She, her name is Sunny, is my ex-girlfriend and yes, she is staying here for a week.”

Sunny gave a small wave to Sungmin, finding the whole situation rather amusing.

“Ex-girlfriend? But you’re gay.”

“I wasn’t before, or at least I thought I wasn’t.”

“Trust me, he’s all gay.” Sunny added in. “ing him before our breakup was anything but fun.”

Heechul felt embarrassed while Sungmin kind of wished he didn’t have to hear that.

“But I heard you gave him an amazing time the other night.”

“Okay, that’s enough. I really don’t think we need to hear any more about my life.”

“Aww, we were only just getting started.” Sunny gave Heechul a little kiss on the cheek.

Sungmin didn’t even bother to pay attention to the other two. Instead he just turned silent. It was all true. His memory of going down Heechul was actually true. That was not what he wanted his first ual experience to be like.

For once, Heechul knew exactly what was going through Sungmin’s mind. He felt sorry for him in a way, knowing exactly how he felt.

“Well I’ll be inside if you need me.” Sunny said as she turned around to go inside, leaving the two in silence.

Both Heechul and Sungmin stared at each other for a moment, the same expression on their faces.

“I have to go.” Sungmin said before making his way down the hall. He tried to make sense of his thoughts, of his relationship, of Heechul. Why couldn’t he just have stayed the quiet person who had nothing out of the ordinary happen to him. He kept on walking out of the building and into the park across the road. He stopped at the nearest bench and sat down. The brightness of the moon making him feel peaceful. Sungmin didn’t even care that Heechul sat down beside him. That Heechul reached for his hand and held it. At that moment, Sungmin just didn’t care.

Heechul put a hand around Sungmin’s waist, pulling him closer.

“I don’t hate you at all.” Sungmin rested his head on Heechul’s shoulder. “I just hate myself. I wish I was different. I wish I wasn’t so afraid of everything. I’m supposed to be this perfect son, who would turn out to be the world’s next greatest concert pianist. But instead my parents kicked me out because I was gay. I tried to kill myself. Twice.” Sungmin held out his right arm, showing the big scar that covered his inner forearm. Heechul had noticed it before, but just thought it was the result of an accident.

“I’m sorry for saying those mean things before.”

Heechul placed a hand under Sungmin’s chin and tilted his face up towards his. He leaned forward, pressing his lips against Sungmin’s, wanting nothing more than a simple kiss.

“We won’t do anything more than this for now.”

Sungmin nodded, agreeing with Heechul’s statement.

“You thought that I would get jealous about your ex-girlfriend.” Sungmin smiled, loving how he was exactly right.

“I am a bit, because she’s prettier than me.” Sungmin pouted before surprising Heechul with a kiss. It was only quick since Sungmin was still a bit awkward.. or just lacking in experience. He sat back, moving slightly away from Heechul, his eyes staring down at the hands now in his lap.

“Heechul?” he asked. “Why do you like me?”

Heechul paused to think of the right words. Nothing came to mind.

“I’m weird and you’re not. So why?”

“I’m rude to people. So why do you like me?” Heechul asked back.

“I’ve told you why before… oh wait… that was a dream. Nevermind.” Sungmin blushed, remembering the dream and that never in his life, would he ever tell Heechul about it. Heechul didn’t bother asking any questions. He really just wanted to change the subject.

“Why don’t I take you home?”

“Only if you promise to have our date next week.”

Heechul nodded. “Of course.” 

"I still can't believe you used to have a girlfriend." Sungming said under his breath as he stood up.

"Well I can't believe you my ."

"We won't ever speak of that again. It never happened." Sungmin used his serious tone, making Heechul laugh a little. 

"I like you because you're weird" Heechul added as they walked out of the park, leaving Sungmin's thoughts to translate the sentence into fifty different meanings.

So that was a bit of a cute kind of serious chapter. I think we kind of needed it, but nothing beats awkward Sungmin.

Next chapter: Ryeowook finds out something he shouldn't have, Heechul has another frustrating conversation with Kyuhyun, while Sungmin decides to do something special for his boyfriend's birthday.