Rather hurt you than him.

I Belong To You, Even If You Don't Want Me To

Donghae POV

 

"What is your deal Eunhyuk?"

We were sitting at the courtyard under a tree due to it being in the middle of May.

"What? All I did was talk back to that bias teacher."

I scratched the back of my head out of frustration.

"You KNOW I'm not talking about that!"

"Than what?"

"You stuck GUM on Kibum's hair?"

"What the hell are you talking about?!" 

"When you were on your way out of the classroom!"

"I didn't touch him... That would only be a waste of gum." He shrugged and turned his attention to two birds fighting on top of the tree.

"He told me! I had to tell the teacher he had gum on his hair. He took it out in front of the class."

"That must have been humiliating. I wish I could have seen it." I could tell he wasn't taking this talk seriously from the smirk on his face.

"So what he did it all to himself?"

"Hmm? Maybe. It wouldn't surprise me since. He is mischievous."

"Why are you being like this?"

"I'm not being like anything. I didn't touch that kid." He started biting his nails, showing a sign of irritation.

"Hyukkie, I won't be mad if you did. I just want to know the truth."

"Donghae!" Hyukkie stood up angrily on one leg. "I. DID. NOT. PUT. GUM. ON. HIS. HAIR! How many times do I have to repeat myself tell you understand? I can't believe you believe him over me? What the heck does he have that I don't? That makes you unable to even trust me!"

"Hyukkie..."

"Me! Your BOOOYFRIEND! I may be a jerk but I don't lie."

"I-"

"You know what? I wished I had done it! That way I would be able to release out all my anger! You make me so mad Hae. You come into the class and ignore me! While I had waited impatiently for your return from the bathroom, than I find out that you didn't even go to the restroom instead you were with that... that lying thief! He is trying to steal you and you don't seem to mind but rather you seem enjoy his presence while I'm here-..."

"Here what?"

"... Here agonizing... It makes my chest hurt really really horrible." I watched him grip his chest tightly, turning his head to the side. He tried using his bangs to cover his face but I could see his flushed skin on his ears.

"Hyukkie... Are you by any chance jealous?"

"No! I never get jealous!" I grabbed his wrist and pulled his hands towards my cheeks.

He has me wrapped around his pinky...

"I'm sorry. I didn't know. I just couldn't look at you this morning. Those girls... I saw how close they were to you. I didn't want to take out my anger out on you.  I didn't want to lose control a-and I wanted show them you were mine but I knew I shouldn't, since clearly your not ready for that."

I carefully pulled his hands around my waist and cupped his face. He refused to face me.

"Hyukkie please look. Look at how much you affect me. No one else could do this." I felt in front of him. The way he slowly turned around made me want to hide in a hole. I could feel myself become flustered and the temperature rise to a thousand degrees. He looked at me with his newly found confidence that only made me loose my own.

"Hae..." He buried his face onto my chest. 

"I'm sorry Hyukkie. I should have believed in you. I won't fall into someone else's trap. I promise you that I will believe in only the things that come out of your mouth and no one else's but only IF you promise to forgive my own white lies."

"Deal." He mumbled on my shirt.

"Good. Now lets take you back to your spot. I told the teacher that I was going to the bathroom. He might be getting suspicious by now."

"Okay." He grabbed onto my waist for support while we walked back to class.

It was silent the whole way there but it was a good type of silence. The walk seemed magical. I wanted time to stop. All I needed and will ever need is for him to be by my side. I would do all I could to keep it that way. Never would I let go even if one day he would want to leave me. If that day would ever come. I'd watch him from afar but I never would really leave. I wouldn't be able to.

"Hey Nick. Sorry about that." I lead Hyukkie back to his original spot

"It's fine. I chatted up some girls anyway. Got two numbers out four. Not bad."

"Haha I'll tell my aunt if you continue to behave that way."

"You should. She would be proud to have a popular son like me." This is in fact true since his mother has always wanted Nick and I to have a fair amount of girlfriends.

"Thanks for helping out"

"No problem. See you after school manager." Nick leaned against the brick wall

"See you after class Hyukkie."

"Bye." He grabbed my wrist before I turned away and pulled me towards him. 

It was only for a second but it was the best part of my day. No matter how short. He had pulled me for a quick peck on the lips. It was enough to send me to cloud 9. I had kept my eyes open so I ended up seeing Hyukkie blush uncontrollably. If only I could kiss him longer but we had company... Crap! Nick saw!

I panicked and quickly pulled Nick closer to me.

"It's not what you think!! I- uh I!"

"Hae. He knows." Hyukkie chuckled at my panicked state.

"H-he knows?"

"Yeah. It obvious. You guys are opened books. Sorry to disappoint." He smirked.

"Go to class Hae. I'll explain more during lunch."

"O-okay. You sure?"

"Yea. Go." Hyukkie pushed me towards the entrance of the classroom.

I hesitated before I pulled the door open. I looked back and saw Nick grinning like an idiot while Hyukkie just stood there smiling with a light blush across his cheeks. 

The teacher was busy writing on the board he did not bother to acknowledge me. Kibum was sitting on his chair smiling brightly at me. 

I'm not the type to curse or show my anger but Kibum was seriously pushing my buttons.

I sighed deeply and walked back to my desk. I should have stayed with Hyukkie for a while longer...

"Hey, what took you so long?"

"Nothing."

"Oh. Okay."

"By the way do you have gum? My breath is smells like onions."

"I don't smell anything."

"Yeah, it's cuz I ate funyuns (AN: they are union chips that i love keke especially the spicy ones) a while back, but the taste won't go away."

"I see. Yeah your lucky I have one stick left." He reached down and grabbed his backpack.

Disappointment washed all over me when I noticed it was same gum that on his hair. I took the gum and stuck it in my mouth bitterly. I wasn't exactly disappointed in Kibum but myself. How could I have lead him on? He is a good kid I really didn't want to hurt him. 

"Thanks."

"No problem." He smiled and went back to copying down the notes the teacher left on the board.

How the hell am I going to set things straight? Can't I just talk to him about it?

"Hey, are you busy after school?"

I saw his eyes light up in anticipation. Guilt now replaced my feelings of disappointment.

"Nope!"

"Than can we meet up a bit? Behind the library?"

"Yeah" 

Today would be the perfect day to set things straight. Hyukkie would be at his doctor's visit and practice was starting late.

The bell rang for our thirty minute break. Everyone began gathering up their books and running out of class. I decided to stay behind to wait for the teacher to finish giving a lecture to Hyukkie and Nick.

"I'll see you after school." Kibum waved at me as he skipped his way to the group of friends waiting for him by the door.

Hyukkie walked back into the class with Nick trailing behind. I could tell Nick was still a bit angry at Hyukkie by the way his head hung low and hands in his pocket.

"Eunhyuk. Nick. I am very disappointed in the both of you, especially you Nick." I got irritated at the old man.

So what if Hyukkie isn't a genius. He is still perfect! He has the looks, the personality, the voice, the heart, and everything else that is needed to be an angel. 

I shook off these thoughts. 

A long time ago I learned to control this urges that want me to protect Hyukkie from all the things evil and/or negative that try to harm him.

"How could you swoop down to his level?" Hyukkie was now the one looking down at his feet.

"If you continue to follow by his examples your grades will fall as well." Hyukkie started kicking at an imaginary can. Not to fast or to hard. 

"I understand if you want to be good to others and get along with them but surely you must know that some are better left alone." I clenched my fists. I couldn't take it anymore. How could he say that about Hyukkie and in front of me?! He must have been dropped on his head when he was a baby!

"Sir. If I may, I think you are being ignorant."

"What?" The teacher clenched his fists.

"I believe that I had once been told by a certain teacher that you can never ever turn your back on someone who needs help especially a friend. I've known Eunhyuk for more than two years. He may be dumb in math, science, and history but he is no fool when it comes to art, music, athletics, and english. He gets hurt easily, which means he easily believes in the words from those whom he admires to be completely true, which is very idiotic of him. In order to avoid giving him more heartache, I would like it if you would not talk about my friend in such a manner. He takes your opinions to heart." I started at the trio completely dumbfounded.

Most of Nick's words were full of cheesiness but I could tell the teacher was shocked at Nick's outburst. 

I stood up quickly with all our backpacks and helped the teacher to his desk

"Teacher we have to go since we have to go to our club meetings are we excused?" 

"Y-yeah go on."

I handed Nick his bag and lead the two out of the classroom as quickly as possible.

"What the heck was that?"

"I don't know. haha I wanted to see what it was like to make a huge speech like they do in the movies?" Nick laughed.

"How did it feel?" Hukkie looked at Nick with curiosity.

"Good but a bit embarrassing." Nick rubbed the back of his head.

"Thanks."

"Don't thank me! I did it for self-fish reasons!" He wrapped his arms around Hyukkie's shoulders.

"Get your hands off of him!" I growled.

"Whatever Hae. I can hug my wife any time I want." He grinned, putting his hands in his pocket.

"You sneaky donk-

"Lets go eat!" Hyukkie interrupted me by yelling at the two of us in the now empty hallway.

"Yes Hun~!" Nick skipped in front of Hyukkie.

"Stop treating him like your wife!! He is not yours!"

"Oh than whose?"

"Mi-! I mean he doesn't belong to anyone!"

"Than I'll make him mine." He grinned while running in circles around Hyukkie as I chased him down to beat him to a pulp. Hyukkie seemed to enjoy the attention because he didn't bother to stop either of us.

We stopped messing around after Hyukkie had beaten up both Nick and I. We made our way to the cafeteria where Kyu and Minie where siting at a table. We had our snacks and Nick bragged to the rest of the group about his "honorable" confrontation by stretching out the truth so much that at one point I was crying at  a corner of the classroom. The day went smoothly despite not having any other classes with Hyukkie.

I grabbed my backpack and slowly made my way through the crowd. I looked out the third floor window and could spot Hyukkie's blonde head bobbing up and down through the crowd of kids rushing to get out. He was with Kyuhyun and Sungmin. I followed them as they made their way to the other side of school and I made me way to one side of the building to the other. Never loosing my sight of them. Hyukkie climbed to the passenger side of Kyuhyun's truck. Sungmin to the back and of course Kyuhyuk to the driver's seat. I watched the truck drive out of the parking lot and out of my sight. I wished I could go with them. It had been so hard for Hyukkie and I to get together.

I know for a fact that Hyukkie has had it easier but I really didn't mind. I would rather carry all his worries and mine combined. All I need from him is his smile. He was after all my everything. For him I would hurt anyone and anything.

I snapped out of my thoughts and walked down the stairways. During some point of my day dreaming most of the students had cleared out except for those who where headed to their locker rooms for after school activities. I walked out of the building and went to the other one located at north side of campus. 

After a couple of minutes I found my self standing in front of Kibum. Other than Hyukkie and Nick, Kibum was my closest friend. I dreaded this moment. For the sake of Hyukkie I would rather hurt Kibum. It maybe self-fish, it didn't matter. I would rather spent eternity feeling guilty for destroying Kibum's heart than to loose the love of my life. I know that Kibum would live happily without me but first he will have to get through this heartache.

Sorry Kibum... I just want to be with Hyukkie. I will do anything to stay by his side.

I took a deep breath and looked at Kibum directly in the eyes. 

"Hey."

"Hi!" He stood there nervously.

"I can't do this."

"Do what?"

"I'm sorry."

 

Sorry for the late update. damn this writer's block!!!!! afjlfdjoaicjew But i'm in the mood of writing write now so I'm gonna try to write the next chapter after I post this!! >:O p.s. this heat (in my hometown) is killing me!!! it never snows here D: we have like 2 seasons (winter [without the snow] and summer hahah) THANK YOU SUBSCRIBERS. I'M KEEPING THIS WRITING CORNER SHORT SO I CAN START THE NEXT CHAPTER SOON~

THANK YOU NEW SUBCRIBERS~!!!!! TREAT YOURSELFS TO SNACKS FROM ME KEKE JK HAVE A HEART <3 <3 (ONE FOR EACH)

lunaluna

haenishyuk

COMMENT REPLIES~!!!!!!!!!!!!!! @}-,----`-- keke that's my rose to you guys XD btw Donghae's new drama comes out on aug. 19(i think)!! haha i can't wait (too bad the lead isn't Hyukkie loool 

lady_na hahha i tried making Hyukkie act cute <3 ahh i love it when he is childish :3 i personally once tried using bbuing bbuing but failed miserably and was deeply embarassed. lol that was kinda my insperation xD

FangirlEunYoo woo so i made this chapter to help clear up the kibumxhae part :D plus i made it so that we could see some hae being all jealous and demanding keke i added fluff! woot~ i liked writing it so i'll be sure to add some more in the future :3

Ruka29Hawkes it was the best cake ever that i finished it before i even got to my computer lol ahh im getting fat from all the junk food hahha xD its ok though cuz birthdays only comes once a year. Wow! your a genius! >:O i used to get above 90% but by trying! hahha your my new role model!! >:( teach me the ways!

saymyname  hehe hope this explained why xD this was a more fluff/serious chapter but i will try to add more humor in the next chapter! >:D i like it when you find my fanfic funny :3 please continue to support me <3

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leia100
I wanted 2 try this out lol :D i WILL update either wed or thur cuz writing is hard, especially since its my 1st time on my 1st fanfic ~ILY SUBSCRIBERS

Comments

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fishy44 #1
Chapter 14: omg why i'm here? jajja i'm famous yeeeeeei
eunsweetlover #2
new suscriber here!!! looks interesting will eunhyuk accept donghae? :)
bad_reality
#3
Chapter 14: I was about to keep this chap and continue nex chap but then..I saw my name xD
WTH
where did you get my name? OMG I LOVE KYUHYUN LMAO
nui_be #4
Chapter 31: *cough*epilogue would be appreciated*cough*
cholily94 #5
such a amazing ff!!
I really love it!will u please make a sequel for it???I think it doesn't need multi chaptered sequel but maybe a one shot will be cool!!!
and I want to ask ur permission for translating this great ff in to persian??so may I dear?
plz let me know ur answer^^
yeonjihee96
#6
Chapter 14: I have my own pov here , hehehehe I like it even though it's a heart breaking *.* , anyway up to the next chapter ;)
SUJU4ever13 #7
Chapter 31: Thankyou for your story!!!! I really enjoyed it.... Sequel please??
xoELFxo
#8
Chapter 31: sequel please~ *batting eyelashes*
Naicumi #9
Chapter 14: Asdasdas You can do that? Is a trap xD Oh~~! OMFG! I was tricked xD
Naicumi #10
Chapter 14: OMFG! NAICUMI? IT'S ME!!!! Oh My ing God I am in a FANFIC!!