My head was about to explode of how much I’ve been thinking of what Taehyung said . I stretch my arms over my head and pull my sheets over it . A sigh a frustration left my lungs . Am I going to lose her ?
Whoever that person is , they’ll be occupying a big part of her life . Am I just going to turn into that distant friend ? That person that she once knew ? Why did she hide it from me? Why do I not know about it ?
But wait , I shouldn’t blame her , should I ? I didn’t tell her about Abigail , too .
Another sigh of frustration crossed my lips and I sooner feel myself fading into the opposite world of dreams .

Due to the sun rays piercing through the thin curtain of the front glass , I slowly part my eyelids , narrowing my eyes to get familiar to the light . I stretch again , my bones cracking with every movement . I lazily turn on my stomach and sneak a look to Taeyung sleeping in the bed under me . I ended up sleeping in the top bed because Taehyung said there was no way I’m sleeping down there , close to anyone to reach me . 
Sometimes he gets too serious into protecting me , but I can’t complain about it . He’s the cutest thing when he’s being protective . I remember that day when I got into a fight with that girl , we’ve been yelling at each other until she dared pull my hair , I barely had the time to hit her back he had already grabbed me off the ground and thrown me behind him , fighting the urge to destroy her figure . Her guy friend got involved too , and they destroyed each other . Me and the girl ended up crying , trying to separate them .  He cursed for the rest of the day and I thought it was cute all along . I always drown in guilt thinking of everything Taehyung had done for me, of all the times he’s been there in the right time , at the right place , with the right vibe  . We’ve only been friends for a couple of years , maybe three , and it always felt like it’s been a lifetime .
We first met at the university , i used to always see him there . He’s always with a hoard of people , laughing and goofing around . He would always hurt himself being dorky . And then I saw him again working at the café , and we got familiar . Our friendship happened so naturally we barely noticed how close we got .
I roll over the bed , cautious not the hit my head to the ceiling . I hardly jump down , trying not to make any noise .
He is a very peaceful sleeper .
I sit down on the ground , besides his bed . I’m so thankful whenever I see him . I’m so thankful his parents felt that night they made him .
I reach out and move a few stands of hair off his face , leaning in to kiss his forehead but backing up because it still felt inappropriate .
I sigh and stand up , looking away . I jump meeting Seunghyun’s chest right into my face .
I look up at him , still embarrassed , and annoyed , from yesterday’s events .

“Hey .” I mumble walking passed him .

“Hi !” He said back , waking up Tae , who glared at him as soon as he opened his eyes .
 
I secretly burst out in laughter for how funny it was . Uh ! What would I do without him ?
I open the door and the cold morning breeze hit my face . I stretch my hands over my head , tensing all my muscles . I deeply breath in , but I never breathed out . I feel two outsider bodies snake around my waist , imprisoning my breath inside my lungs . I stay still , frozen in my position , carefully looking down to them . My whole back and waist burned , and stung . Heat covered my sight and I start seeing blur . My eyes filled with tears could barely see figures . He leaned closer and rested his head on my shoulder . I slowly rest my arms down .

“It’s beautiful , ha ? “ He whispered , teasing my urge to cry .

I don’t know why I want to cry , but I felt used , someway . I reach to his hand intertwined on my stomach and fight to open them . I didn’t enjoy being touched like that . I hated being touched without permission . He did it yesterday night , and he’s doing it again today . And I do not enjoy it at all . I thought I would like  it , to be in his arms , and I do , but not like that . He doesn’t own my body and I don’t like how he’s been giving himself the right to touch me , lately . I struggle to part his hands but he only held me closer against his body . I could feel every part of it , from his chest against the back of my neck , to his knees against the back of thighs , and I don’t like it at all .
I struggle further starting to cry .