“I promise you it’ll pass, once you learn how to control it this will never happen again.” Baekhyun said in a reassuring voice but you were still so shaken by what had just happened that you barely believed anything of what he had just told you. At this point it seemed as if you were never going to be able to control anything you felt weak, as if you were trapped in a body which wasn’t yours. You had no idea how to use it and all the thoughts were so weird inside of your head that you barely understood them. He hushed you while grabbing your face inside of his both hands, his thumbs brushing over your cheeks to collect the tears that had escaped and were making their way towards your chin. “Don’t cry my love, it’s all just temporary.” He tried again and you blinked your eyes to removed the tears that were clouding your view so that you could look at him. Throughout all the time you had spent with him he had been worried about you before, the times when you had been hurt, or when you had almost died and then there had been the day you had given birth.  But now it seemed as if the look didn’t leave his face, as if it was a constant feeling that had taken over him and had taken master of him. Ever since that morning you had woken up and your thoughts about him seemed to have vanished he seemed scared that he would wake up beside you one day and you wouldn’t have a clue about who he was. Who were you to blame him, he had probably been mortified because of that moment. Though that wasn’t the only thing he had to worry about, now that you were trying to get used to your new self, who you didn’t want to be, he also had to worry about your wellbeing. He had seen it all, one morning you had woken up crying endlessly, mourning for something you had lost and you would never be able to get back, about the death of your sister which had seemed to happen all over again and the betrayal of your family. Yesterday you had been extremely angry and a plate hadn’t survived your fit after being thrown against the wall. This morning he had actually believed that things were going to be fine, since it had started off with you smiling at him. But when you had looked at yourself in the mirror and had noticed a few hairy ears on top of your head you had started screaming in terror and now he was trying to calm you down while sitting on the cold tiled bathroom floor. 

Of course you knew it was ridiculous that you were acting like this but while you had been feeling a little bit better this morning you had been shocked to see yourself in the mirror. You knew that one day you’d have to accept the fact that there was another side of you now and that there were more powerful things you could do than you had ever done, but that didn’t mean it didn’t terrify you. What was going to be next, a tail? You forced yourself to take a deep breath and to calm down. This was insane, you had gone through worse things than this, but you had no idea why this still felt so difficult. It was as if you were locked up in someone else’s body, as if you had become a stranger to yourself. In your dreams you had heard people asking you who the hell you were, and you hadn’t been able to answer him. You had dreamt about Baekhyun, that he had stopped loving you because that spark just wasn’t there anymore, that the things that had caused him to fall for you was just gone. There was nothing you could do about it, because you would never be able to get your humanity back again. But the worst thing was probably that you felt like a terrible mother, because you weren’t in the condition to take care of your own son. He was yours, you were supposed to be the one nurturing him and cheering him up when he was crying, and you hadn’t seen him in two days. You knew you had to be strong and you had to figure out a way to get through all of this, for him, so that you could be there for him. “I still don’t understand. Why? Why did you do this to me?” You asked and you didn’t mean to sound accusing, knowing this hadn’t been his free choice. But still he flinched by the tone inside of your voice and it immediately made you feel bad. A sigh left his lips as he lowered himself onto the bathroom floor beside you, taking your hand in his and lacing you fingers together. His temperature wasn’t warmer than yours, you couldn’t feel any difference when his skin touched yours and you realized that you missed that. “I swear I didn’t have an other choice. Olvida told me that you lost too much blood and if I wouldn’t do it fast that you would die. I couldn’t do that, I couldn’t watch you laying there and see how the life got out of you, not once again. So I did the only thing that felt right, the most selfish thing I ever could have done. I turned you and you’re going to hate me for saying this but I haven’t regretted it ever since.”

What he said was true, at first you felt a spark of true disgust travel through your whole body and you felt the urge to lash out on him, to slap him, to scratch him and to yell at him. But in the end you didn’t and slowly the feeling washed away, as if it had never been there in the first place. How could you hate him for saving your life, for loving you so badly that he couldn’t even think about loosing you? If you had been him, if you were the one who had to make the call, then you would have done the exact same thing. You let out a deep sigh and you saw his body tense, he was still expecting you to get angry with him. “And you really think that I can do this?” You asked, noticing how he turned his head to look at you while you stubbornly stared at the wall across of you, seeing how the small tiles covered it. It was mean from you to blame him while he was only trying to help you, but you needed a little time to get over all of this. His hand squeezed your a little tighter and you slowly turned so that you could meet his gaze. “Of course you can, I wouldn’t have turned you if I had known that you wouldn’t. One of the things I admired about you when you were still human was your courage and your perseverance and I know that no matter what’s going to happen, those are things that will never change. You’re still the same person, you just get to live a little longer and you have a few more tricks now.” He explained, even though until now you hadn’t found any advantages of those tricks. But maybe he was right, maybe this could turn out to be a good thing in the end. Later you’d have to start worrying about the fact that you were aging much faster than he was, and now you would never have to think of that as an issue anymore. From now on you two had so much time you could spend together, it felt like you had forever. At least that could be true if you were able to solve all the problems that w