The only thing you could do was stare out of your window and wait for Amity to return. You had sent her towards the guard who could tell you where the Crown prince was at this moment. It wasn’t like you needed to talk to him right at this instant, but after everything that had happened you wanted some information and you also wanted to know if he was okay. Not knowing how he was doing and how he was handling the situation seemed harder for you than you had expected it to be. You had expected that you wouldn’t care, especially not about the whole situation, but it concerned you much more than you had imagined. Last night you had barely slept, you had been staring at your ceiling all night long, wondering, thinking of what had been going on. Was everyone alright, what about Olvida, and what about Baekhyun? Yesterday had been a wonderful day, the ball had been an amazing event and people had all been enjoying themselves. It had seemed like a day that couldn’t have been ruined, not by anything, but that was a very wrong thought. A small incident had turned the whole castle upside down and had escalated very quickly into something big. Even though you knew you weren’t really a part of this castle you still hated it to be left out and not to know how everyone was doing. 

Last night you had had a lot of things to think about, not just everything that had happened after Baekhyun had left you on the balcony, but also before that. He had arranged such a wonderful surprise for you with the fireworks and you had loved every second of it. But it had made you feel so many feelings you had never felt before, which you weren’t supposed to feel. At the balcony he had held you in a way a man had never touched you before, he had been so sweet and gentle. He had danced with you, he had made you feel special. While staring at the fireworks he had been so close to you, his face only a few inches away from yours. You had been able to see your own reflection in his eyes, to feel his breath on your skin, to scent the smell of his cologne. You could still imagine the ways his arms had been wrapped around your middle, the way he had gazed inside of your eyes, the way his look had wandered towards your lips. At that moment you were sure you wouldn’t have pushed him away if he had kissed you, but he hadn’t. Were you happy that he hadn’t because you wouldn’t have defended yourself? Were you sad because he hadn’t because actually you had wanted him to? There were so many thoughts circling around through your head, like an endless spiral. 

Did he regret what he had said to you yesterday, what he had done? What did he think about this whole situation? You hadn’t had the chance to talk to him yet, to see him and you probably also wouldn’t dare to bring it up again. It was embarrassing if he’d know that you still thought about it that much, that you still cared about it. But after all, this wasn’t the right time to ask him about these kind of things. He had much more important things to worry about at this moment than what possibly could have happened in between the two of you last night, things that probably concerned him much more at this point. Which you did understand, you would be the same way if you had been him. You could still remember it very clearly, what had happened last night and how it had gone, you were sure you wouldn’t forget it very quickly. After the prince had left you to check on the situation you had felt unstable and light headed, confused about what had happened with the man who had still been sharing the balcony with you not so long ago. You had walked back into the big hallway, only to find out that the peace had been completely disturbed. All the elegant and not frightened invitees had been rushing through the room, some of them bumping into people and furniture, trying to find a way out of the castle. It had been pure hysteria, everyone had been panicked and had been running and screaming. You had had no idea what had been going on and as soon as the Crown prince had spotted you standing frozen on your spot he had demanded one of his servants to take you towards your room. 

This morning it was Amity who had informed you that some strange creatures had attacked the soldiers outside of the castle and had worked their way inside. They had wounded and killed several of their visitors, and also a few soldiers. One of them was Conan, he had been badly injured and was staying in the south wing of the castle, where the caretakers kept their offices. The fact that he was in good hands was enough for you to calm you down, after all it wasn’t like you and Conan were best friends. Though you didn’t want him to die, Baekhyun and Olvida would both be devastated and hurt by it, and you also didn’t want him killed, you were over that phase by now. It seemed to take forever before Amity walked back towards the doors of your room. “His majesty is in his room at the moment. It seems like he has been working all night to get everything organized and settled, he’s probably resting at the moment.” She said as she stood in front of you, formal and neat like always. Honestly you wished that she would let go of the formalities for just one second and would just walk over and hug you. That was what you could really use right now, a hug and someone who told you that everything was going to be okay. You were sick and tired of living in insecurity and fear, you were in need of safety, something you had never known before. When you had moved here you had thought that everything could be better, since nothing could be as bad as freezing and starving to death, but maybe this was even just as bad. 

“Do you think he wants to see me?” You asked her, wondering if you should stay away or should go and give him a visit.  On one hand you wanted to hear from him, even if it was just for a few minutes and he was also your only link to Conan’s condition. But on the other hand you were afraid that he wasn’t in the mood to see you and that he rather wanted to be alone. It had been a long night for him and he probably wanted to have some time for himself and rest. And after seeing Amity’s expression you decided that it was best for you to wait a little longer, even though you were barely able to hold yourself back. You would see him soon, after everything was back to how it used to be and Conan was healthy again. It would probably be for the best if you’d give him some space right now, he didn’t need another person to worry about at this moment. “Never mind, I’ll see him at dinner.” You said to your maid and with that let her know that it was okay for her to leave you alone. There were still so many things you had to worry about, so many things that had to be taken care of. Maybe you could help to solve this whole situation. You were a good hunter, maybe you would be able to come up with a plan. After all these creatures were half human, these wolves didn’t know their weak spots. 

As soon as Amity left you felt how the silence pressed on top of your shoulders. At this moment you felt more alone then you had done in a very long time. Most of the times you didn’t notice it, because there was always someone around to keep you company. But right now you just wanted to have someone who understood you, someone who just asked you how you were feeling instead of keeping a safe and professional distance from you. The people who worked inside of the castle were all so nice and friendly to you, but it wasn’t the kind of people you wanted to have around you. You stared out of the window, your eyes pointing towards the few small of trees that were standing a little further ahead in the garden. It would have been nice to go there and visit your the rose you had buried there for your sister. It was during these kind of days that you missed her the most, just as your other sisters and your parents. How would they be doing without you? They had a mouth less to feed, which would be much easier for them to survive, but then again Baekhyun had made sure that they had everything they needed. Would they think of you sometimes? Would they wonder where you were and how you were doing? Did they worry if you had enough to eat and who you were with? 

this wasn’t the right time for you to think about these kind of things. You could feel your heart throbbing and you realized how much you missed them. You couldn’t even believe that it had been so long since they had taken you away from your home. With a quick turn of your head you stared at your desk, the chair behind it had been empty for the past few days. You had been so busy with preparing for the ball that you hadn’t had the time to draw. At this moment that seemed to be exactly what you needed, a relaxing moment with a pencil inside of your hand. You walked over and grabbed an empty piece of paper from the pile, ignoring the drawings you had made of the prince. Looking at them would make it even harder for you to stay away from him for as long as it was still necessary. It was the first time since you were here that you had the feeling you wanted to draw something else than Baekhyun’s smiling face. With a blank mind you drew a few lines across of the paper and this time it seemed like you didn’t even need an eraser. The image you wanted to see reflected was so clear in front of your eyes that you didn’t have a hard time to put it on there. You only noticed that it was lunch time until your stomach started rumbling. You blinked your eyes a few times in order to see your surroundings again and noticed that you had been so caught up into your drawing that you hadn’t even noticed time had passed. 

Instead of standing up and walking towards the door to get something to eat you stayed seated and looked down onto your drawing. Normally you weren’t a big fan of your own work, you could always find some improvements or mistakes. But you couldn’t find anything wrong about this one at all, for one reason or another it just seemed to be perfect. If it hadn’t been because you had made it yourself you wouldn’t have been able to tell that this was only a drawing. It felt so real tha