Chapter 11

Selfish
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I haven't reviewed it so there might be a few mistakes here and there...just ignore them.. :)

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“There’s something disturbing about recalling a warm memory and feeling utterly cold” – Dark Places, Gillian Flynn.

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MINJUN

It was an exhausting day at work. I had a meeting with the Board members and they were inquiring about the project. It was so hard maintaining that smile all along when I was so messed up from inside. I threw off my shoes as I entered and slumped on my sofa. It felt like a thousand people were hammering my head from inside. I loosened my tie and lazily lied down on the sofa, turning to my side nuzzling in the soft leather of the sofa.

How long had it been since I properly slept on my bed?

My eyes fluttered close and my mind wandered off to distinct random memories. Like me cuddling with Junho when he used to be sick, just to keep him warm. Like the way we kissed on the terrace of the orphanage with the cold wind brushing through our shirts. We clung to each other to feel warm and it actually used to feel so warm all of a sudden.

Images of us flashed through my head, and it was painful. It hurt. But for some reason, I didn’t want to open my eyes and break off the images. It almost felt like it was happening at the moment. Just that it wasn’t.

Since he had come back, I got these illusions and dreams frequently. They were happy memories which made me cry because we were no longer like that. I wanted him. Honestly, I didn’t want to give in so easily. What if he left me again?

I frowned as I heard the doorbell ring. I had to entertain someone now? At 1 in the night?

I dragged myself off the sofa and didn’t even bother to make myself look presentable. Looking through the peephole, I saw this tall dude with fair skin. His hands were in his pockets. He looked right at the peephole, like he knew I was seeing him. Who shows up at someone’s house at 1 in the night?

He didn’t really look dangerous so I unlocked the door.

Partly opening it, I stepped out and stared at him, “Yes?”

“Kim Minjun?” he asked raising his eyebrows.

“That is me” I said.

“I’m Chansung” he said extending his hand for a handshake.

I hesitantly held it.

“I’m sure you don’t know me. But I kinda know you really well” he said. I looked at him with a confused expression. I wasn’t in a mood to solve riddles from random people right now.

“I’m Junho’s therapist and close friend. From US”

Why did Junho have a therapist? I realized that he had let go off my hand but I still held on. I cleared my throat and let go. What was I supposed to say?

“Can I come in?” he asked.

Without thinking, I stepped aside letting him come in.

I closed the door as he took off his shoes and walked in to the living room.

“You need to know a lot of things” he said as I motioned him to sit on the adjacent sofa.

“If you’re here to ask me to forgive Junho, then please leave” Damn. Why was I being so adamant?

“You’re anger against him is justified, but you should have heard him out at least once” he said. Was that a glare I saw in his eyes? Yes. He was glaring at me.

“Did he send you here?” I asked.

“No. He’s not in a position to even open his eyes right now. Let alone speak to someone”

“What do you mean?” Tension rose in me.

“He had an overdose of sleeping pills this night. He’s in the hospital right now”

Suddenly it felt like it was hard to open my mouth. My brain couldn’t function. I looked at him speechlessly.

“Why did he do that?” I asked. It was barely audible.

“Because he wanted to die”

He was strongly glaring at me and I wanted to crumble to dust. He wanted to die…

“Can you please listen to what I have to say? You can make a decision after hearing me. But you can’t just come to a conclusion without hearing everything and knowing everything” he said.

“Tell me” I said after a pause. I had a feeling this wasn’t going to be good.

“I’ll start from 12 years ago. Junho came to know he was being adopted just a day before he actually left. He was given only a few hours to decide. And being a 14 year old orphan, the first thing which would light up his mind would be parents. He asked them if they could take you along”

I looked at him.

“He really did, but they said they couldn’t afford two kids”

He continued, “But it was nothing like what he expected it would be like. He was promised he could talk to you over the phone and come every 2 months or so to see you”

I looked down and bit my tongue to stop tears. What was he trying to say?

My head hurt. I thought about all this every second of my life but when I was hearing someone say it, it hurt me worse.

“He was locked up in a room all day except for school hours. He was abused in every manner by his foster parents”

“What?” I looked up to stare at his serious eyes. That couldn’t be true.

“Have you seen the scar on his forehead?”

I didn’t reply nor did I nod my head. I was already so dazed. Was it because of…?

“His step mom threw him off the stairs. He was

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Comments

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mochi_89 #1
Chapter 7: I read your writing when someone in Twitter said this is one of the best 2pm's fanfic ever. And up till to this chapter, I can't stop reading! Your writing is superb! I love it so much! ???? I hope you will continue writing ?? okay, I want to continue reading the next chaps hehehe
Hangho
#2
Chapter 11: omg i can't stop crying.. i read it twice but i'm feeling the same pain everytime.
Hangho
#3
well written, this story is amazing
author-nim you deserve an award... If it's a book i'll buy it
please don't give up writing stories like this, go on this style.. i really like it
thank you
ovygaara
#4
I'm glad i found this story.
Oh, how i love angst. It clenched my heart everytime i read the part when junho is torture, but weirdly i like that part xD
Honestly i dont really like reading junbros story as a lover before. I prefer them as a brother. But i decided try to read this story when i read the synopsis. And now, i am not regreting my decision to give it a try. This story os amazing! You've done a great work author-shi. I really like the plot, not too rush, but not too long either. Its just perfect. And i really like how u discribe the character emotion. I felt like i also can feel what they feel.
Thanks for ur hardwork author-shi! (∩_∩)
Anglewings123 #5
Chapter 15: I hate school too :)
myrajunho
#6
Chapter 27: Im glad i found this story.. thanks a lot. I really love it. Seriously.. u make me cry, sob, smile like crazy .. kkk.. please write more about junho.. sorry for being demand reader.. but not so sorry bcoz ur talented author.. n i craved for more.. thanks author-nim for yr hardwork.. really appriciate that *bow
TharindiAriyasinghe
#7
Chapter 27: Oh my god! This is such a wonderful story with a perfect ending! It was satisfying to read this! Definitely going to read this again because Juncouple is love! KhunYoung was also really cute :D
Thank you so much for writing this! You did a great job! :)
Minjun ♡ Junho
Asan_ficHORA
#8
Chapter 27: Thank you so much for writing this! :-D