Mi Joo’s POV

There is this mixed feeling building inside me when I learn that he will be hosting Simply Kpop as a special guest MC. Glad that I can see him again and also nervous that I have to see him again. A lot of thoughts is going through my messy mind if I manage to encounter him today. What will he say to me? How will he act if he run into me? A billion questions are popping in my head and I am starting to get worried for no absolute reason. It is only him, there is nothing to be afraid of; yes, because it is only him, that is why I should be afraid.

I cannot allow him to find out the real cause as to why I want to break up with him. It will never be because I stop loving him, the special feeling will forever remain closely in my heart; he is my first and nobody will ever forget about their first love. I initiate the separation as I discover I have a mental health related issue.

When I originally know about it, my initial reaction is freaking out like why will I have such a problem when I am properly sane. It is not easy for me to accept it but I have to face the fact sooner, I cannot keep myself in denial.

Hun Seok is right all along; no one is actually following us on the road, it is purely my imagination. The voices that I heard during our short getaway, it is all just an illusion. The doctor says it is due to my lack of sleep and my high stress level for the past months which resulted into this problem. Even though the doctor explains it is nothing major and it can be cured, but to me, it sounded as if I am a very mentally ill person. And I do not want him to be with someone who is mentally ill. Therefore, I end things off with him before our relationship can go any further. It is the right decision to do.

I leave the waiting room to get some fresh air when I coincidentally bump into him at the corridor. It has been two weeks since I last saw him and oh my, he still looks dashing and gorgeous as ever. Seeing him makes me realise how much I miss him and I can tell that he is still broken. Maybe I should not have finish it without giving him a good proper explanation.

“Hi,” Mark starts the conversation. He speaks in a bright manner as if the break up is not affecting him. To be honest, I do not even know what is our relationship status; is it exes, friends, acquaintances or strangers.

Though it is awkward being casual with each other, the atmosphere is definitely more comfortable than the first time we talk after we parted our ways. “Paper…” Mark mentions out of nowhere, using his fingers to trace out a rectangle in the air.

I nod thoughtfully, recalling why he needed it. Since we happen to stumble across each other outside Lovelyz’s waiting room, it is convenient for me to get him the papers. Returning to pass him a piece of unused paper and a blue ballpoint pen, Mark suggests if we can be in a more secluded area in case someone eavesdrops us. I agree to his plan and the both of us go to the rooftop.

Once we reach, Mark jots down the contact number and the name of Seung Hoon’s reporter friend neatly. Mark folds the paper and unexpectedly grabs my hand, placing the sheet on my palm. His sudden touch sends warmth to my body which I miss so dearly.

“If you ever change your mind and you are contacting him, you must tell m