“I still can’t believe you didn’t tell us you bought a house.” Dara unnie pouted as she sat on my bed next to Bom and my suitcase.

“It was impulse.” I shrugged as I placed another item of clothing in my suitcase. I was lying a lot now a days, and I didn’t like it but I couldn’t stop.

“You said it’s not ready yet that’s why you won’t let us come along with you, so why are you in such a rush to leave?” Bom commented as she once again removed my clothes from the suitcase.

“Unnie!” I complained again. She had been doing that all along which was why my suitcase remained empty! I was getting nowhere with them here. I had to get most of my stuff packed by the time he came to pick me up. I turned to Chaerin unnie who was standing at the door frame silently watching us for some help with them. After my best pleading face attempt I saw her slump her shoulders which meant she had given into me.

“Alright c’mon girls let’s let her pack. I’m sure when her house is ready we’ll be the first to see it.” she came in and pulled the unnies off my bed. They reluctantly left my room complaining and in displeasure, so that just Chaerin and I were left in the room.

“Thanks unnie.” I smiled at her. She simply nodded at me offering a nurturing smile. She began walking away but stopped midway.

“Minji?”

“Hmm?”

“I don’t know what it is you’re hiding from us, but I want you to know that you don’t have to run away from us to hide it. Whatever it may be we’ll accept it as it is. Talk to us when you’re ready yeah?” with that she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.

I dropped the shirt I was gripping onto, and held my bed for support. Why were her words affecting me to the point of crying? It’s not like I wasn’t going to see them ever I’d see them in a few days for our next concert for crying out loud! Maybe it was the fact that I was hiding such a big secret from the three girls that practically raised me through my adolescent years it just wasn’t right, but I couldn’t tell them the real reason. After the things I learned last week I knew I had to go to him more than ever.

“Yah Yifan! What are you doing let go of her.” Suho confronted us as we walked into the house.

“Get outta my way Suho!” Yifan roared keeping his grip around my arm.

“You need to calm down you’re not thinking straight!” I saw more of the guys begin to crowd around us. Yifan let out a sarcastic scoff.

“Yah! You all saw what I do to those who defy and test my patience.” he pulled out that same handgun from his waistband for the second time this night. “Now move! All of you!” he commanded. They all reluctantly made way so we could get through.

“Let go of me!” I fought against Yifan’s grip on my arm as he shoved me into my room.

“What were you thinking disobeying my orders?! You don’t know what you’ve done!” he roared.

“Apparently I don’t know a lot!” I fought back fighting the oncoming tears. I had had enough. It would all end tonight. I wanted this to be over, I didn’t want to pay attention to the way my heart squeezed in agony at the thought of cutting all strings with him, but tonight I would ignore it all! This burning fire within me for this man would be put out tonight!

“There’s a reason for that! The less you know the safer you are! This world is a dangerous place for someone like you!”

“Then why did you drag me into it?! Why did you let me get so comfortable in it?! You just ing shot three men point blank with absolute no emotion. You’re the real danger here!” I shoved my forefinger against his shoulder. “You’re a monster…”

“I am not a monster.” he uttered looking me dead in the eyes. “The real monster, the real danger was that bastard that had his hands all over you.” he said through gritted teeth.

“What are you talking about? He said he was your brother.”

“He is not my brother.” he sneered pushing me against the wall arms locking in on either side of me. “That bastard is absolutely nothing to me!” he bellowed. The hurt and anger in his voice let me know that this man standing before me was greatly affected by Sunny in his past. I don’t know what it was about today maybe the alcohol I was given to drink, but I was going to push his limits and cross over the line he had drawn for me. Tonight we would bear our darkest secrets to each other because I knew damn well I couldn’t let him go anymore. This selfish heart would not listen to the rationality my brain used to flee the scene.

“Then tell me who he is? Let me into that head of yours because you know every damn thing about me! Why is everyone so thankful to you for saving their lives?! You want to spend forever with me how I can I spend forever with a stranger?! Let me in” I pleaded while my fist banged against his rock hard chest. Through my blurred vision I could see his eyes begin to gloss over with oncoming tears.

“You’re not strong enough to know abou the darkness in my life!” he turned his back to me walking away towards the other side of the room.

“Try me.” I challenged.

“What do you want to know?! That I had a ed up childhood! My dad was murdered before my eyes! My mother remarried an that would beat her to near death every damn night, and after he would come looking for me so we could ‘play’ after!” he made air quotations when he said play and I knew that bastard of a stepfather did unspeakable things to him. “That I killed him with my bear hands one night, and she turned her back one me at 12 years old. She left me to fend for myself because I killed the love of her life.” I could see the pain in his eyes as he recalled the memories. My tears were now torments running down my cheeks.

“I’m sorry.” I choked.  I wanted to hug him and stop the demons of his past life from coming back to haunt him, but I had to know. I had to know his story in order to understand why he was the way he was, so I didn’t attempt to hush him just yet. I did, however, take his hand in mine and led him to the bed so we could sit.

“At 13 I was offered a way out of the miserable life on the street. I was picked up off the streets by an older man, Leehom, he promised me a better life. No more scavenging through trash in hopes of a meal. No more pitiful looks and cold nights, but that new life involved blood and drugs. So, I took it I wanted a way out! He was the closest thing to a  father figure I ever had. He taught me everything I know. It was as if I became his right hand man at such a young age. He took me in as if I were his own son, but his biological son, Sunny, grew bitter towards me. He was someone I looked up to as an older brother. Someone I thought I could trust, but he hated me.” he let out a bitter laugh. “See Leehom picked up kids like me all the time Suho being one of them too. One day he brought home this shy, pretty girl. I was 18 young and naive I fell in love for the first time, but Sunny couldn’t take seeing us together, so he...he…” he looked up to the ceiling in hopes of stopping the torment tears. “I watched him torture her until she couldn’t take anymore, and she died in my arms. Leehom died two months later, and he left me half of his fortune and business. The other half he gave to Sunny. Leehom wanted us to run his business together, but Sunny had other plans. He couldn’t stand the idea of an orphaned kid taking his money. I tried to endure as much as I could, but in the end he was able to drive me away. I took what little I could and left. Suho followed me out, and we built what we have from the ground up. Along the way we met other kids that joined us. Then people from Leehom left Sunny and joined us too. I did what I needed to do to survive! And I’m not losing you!”

He abruptly stood up and used his arms to support his weight against the wall. I saw him shake his head. I could tell he was falling into his memories, but he was trying to remain in the present. I shouldn’t have pushed him this far his PTSD was kicking in.

“Hey, no I’m right here.” I went up to him and hugged him from behind. “Look at me baby.” I turned him around, but he was already half gone. He had a hazy distant look in his eyes. I cupped his face trying to keep his eyes on me. “Look at me you’re right here with me no one is going to hurt you anymore.” He opened and closed his eyes trying to stay with me.

“Argh!” he groaned as he pushed me away and held his head. “No! No!” he started hitting against his skull.

“No, no you’re not going back there stay with me c’mon.” I approached him again. I took his trembling figure into my arms. “Look at me you’re safe. I’m safe. Stay with me don’t let the dark consume you.”

“Get away from Minzy. I’m losing to it. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. Just breathe. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have taken you back. Just stay with me please.” The feeling of desperation consumed me.

“Minzy!” Bom yelled. “Yah! Where did you go? I’ve been calling you for like forever now!” Bom pouted.

“Nowhere. He didn’t go anywhere.” I mindlessly said.

“What?” she questioned.

“No nothing. What happened?” I diverted the conversation. “Aish maknae you’re so weird! Anyways I came to ask what time the manager oppa was coming for you because last I heard he was in Busan for a family wedding?”

“Ah no my parents are the ones helping me move in.” Lies all I was feeding them were lies.

“Wait I thought they….”

“They came back early okay?! Gosh can’t you guys get off my back!” I shouted, but immediately regretted it the moment after. She looked shocked and hurt at my response. “No, unnie I’m sorry it’s just been stressful these past few weeks. Look I’ll have you guys over once the place is finished yeah? I just need to hurry and pack right now. You understand right?” Lies all lies. Yifan told me not to invite anyone over until he gave me the all clear. I hated lying to them, but it was for the safety of everyone. I had to lie.

Afterword

Long time no see. Long time no see. Doom dada dida... Hello everyone! Sorry for the long wait but university is in session I just got past the midterms, and I just got a job! So woohoo for me! I'm going to be quite busy, but I plan on updating as much as I possibly can. I hope you guys like it. I tried my best to tell his story the way I imagined it. Let me know what y'all think in the comment section below! Please comment, subscribe, and upvote. :)