Jimin really had underestimated Yoongi’s strength. The wounds on his knuckles he was cleaning right now needed to stay bandaged for a few days, but luckily Jimin did really well in health education class, so he could ensure that he was going to be alright. It was almost 1am.

“Why do you seem like you’ve been trying to suppress a smile this whole time? Does my pain make you that happy?” Yoongi asked teasingly after one particular painful sting he felt, although he only wanted to get the younger talk.

“You seemed cool earlier hyung, that’s it.” Jimin said quietly and patted the medicine-soaked cotton pad even gentler around the wounded parts of Yoongi’s hand. “But even though I’m really thankful that you did that for me I can’t lie that I was shocked. For the past ten months I haven’t once seen something close to the similar hmm… let’s say ‘act of aggression’.”

“You have a point. I don’t like aggression.”

“Then why? Why did you go all the way and hurt yourself for someone so… for someone you’ve never even met before?” Jimin suddenly raised his voice, both under the pressure of worry and guilt.

“When I said I don’t like aggression I didn’t only mean that I don’t like initiating it, I also don’t like witnessing it and he was visibly taking out his own aggression on you. Even though punching that person only made me contradict myself and what I just said I don’t fully regret it. I did it for you, not for him. I doubt that I hurt him any more than I hurt myself anyways, it’s been years since I’ve last done something like this. I swore not to.” Yoongi said and Jimin was surprised to realize how much there actually was about Yoongi that he didn’t know about, especially that unfamiliar strict and emotionless voice he was talking with, that was in complete contrast with the usual timid and quiet Yoongi.

“You’ve done this before?” Jimin inquired quietly and avoided looking at the older’s eyes, probably because he wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer, probably because he was scared that the question isn’t supposed to be asked in the first place.

“People change all the time. Every day of their life actually, some more drastically and some not. I’ve changed. I guess I wasn’t lucky enough to come across people that might’ve had better influence in my life in my earlier years. I’ve done things before Jimin, I’ve punched a few people now and then, though they didn’t get away with only one serving of my fist. I wasn’t the same before, but I’ve done my best to try and erase those few years of my life, so I don’t remember much.” Yoongi explained without putting any kind of emotion in his words, although he was still careful not to say too much.

“Is that why you said you don’t like aggression?” Jimin whispered again and finally looked into his eyes. When answering Jimin’s earlier question the fear of scaring the younger away, or even worse - making him disgusted with that he had done before definitely lingered in his mind, but of course it wasn’t like this. Park Jimin wasn’t like that and he was everything but predictable. There were no traces of fear, disgust or any kind of negative feelings towards the older that showed in his eyes. Of course there was worry instead.

“Aren’t you going to ask? Why have I hurt people before, even though now I’m like this?”

“You never asked who that person was hyung, you never asked if the things Kibum said were true, you never asked if I also have had a relationship with men before, you never asked anything about my past either.” Jimin retorted just as seriously. He was still holding Yoongi’s hand although he was done bandaging it and the older also wasn’t pulling back, so Jimin wrapped his hand even tighter around it. Yoongi stared at the younger for a bit, but then took a really deep breath.

“I guess I wanted to fit in, I didn’t want to be the ‘smartass’ of my class anymore. The typical. The boys in my class were happy to see me try and talk to them, because at that time it only meant they could have even more fun with me, but I was so desperate that I ignored all of that. I was seventeen and close to graduation, yet I thought it made so much sense to let myself follow them around and become a slave of alcohol and the conflicts that resolved from that. Three broken ribs and a sprained wrist later I finally came to my senses and managed to get myself away from that. Away from them. Aggression only adds fuel to the already lit fire, leads to another set of aggression, to stupid conflicts, to wounds that cannot be healed. I swore to stay away from it and to never resolve to it ever again if possible. And so I did, although that made me draw a line between me and the rest of the world for the longest time, probably up until Namjoon was assigned to be my roommate. If it wasn’t for him I would probably be even worse at communicating and being around people, maybe even attending a cyber-college to go with that. Being around him made me a bit more open to people again.”

“So that’s why you sure were so awkward and stiff when we first met.” Jimin smiled for the first time tonight, breaking the heavy atmosphere.

“Trust me, that wasn’t even at my worse. But you also contributed a lot for me to be able to talk so freely again. You and Hoseok and even Taehyung.” Yoongi also smiled slowly returning to his usual self, still resting his hand in Jimin’s. It was comfortable.

“I’m sorry hyung.” Jimin said again and Yoongi could feel how strongly he meant those words in every syllable he spoke out.

“As I said I don’t regret it and I would’ve done it again if I had to. But you were lucky Jimin, you know that right? I know I might not be as reliable as Hoseok is and may not offer the most rational and objective solution to whatever is troubling you like him, but if there is something that might endanger you I don’t want you to hide it from me. I know you’re not a child and you can take care of yourself perfectly fine, but some help is never too much, right?” Yoongi said again while locking his eyes with the younger, feeling like his powers were leaving him. It’s definitely been awhile since he had talked so seriously this much.

“Thank you for trusting me. I promise.” Jimin smiled weakly at Yoongi again and nodded. Yoongi felt relaxed after seeing hints of his usual cheeky smile appear on Jimin’s face again, even if it was just for a few seconds. It had been gone for too long and that didn’t suit him.

Jimin’s promise was all Yoongi needed to hear and it was all Jimin could’ve possible explained at his current state. He was still shaken by all of the past memories that came rushing back along with Kibum, by the accusations that he was a nobody and that he never was, but right now it was all fading away as he was getting more and more convinced that he was a somebody to Yoongi. Jimin’s floor heating lured the two exhausted boys and both of them were soon asleep on the floor, too tired to dream of anything.

--

“Here is the herbal tea with two servings of honey. I thought the second serving might come in handy with that sore throat, so I added that from me. You’ll get better in no time.” Yoongi said after serving Mrs. Minkyung.

“I will never get tired of your niceness Yoongi, but I think I’m getting spoiled with all the special treatment I always receive.” The old lady glowed in pleasure and took Yoongi’s hand in hers. “Are you getting along with your girlfriend? You seem tired recently.” She continued and practically forced Yoongi to sit next to her, probably because she was feeling chatty today.

“Sorry…?”

“Your eyes give out many secrets Yoongi, sleepless nights being one of them. Do you need any advice? Men can be quite oblivious to girls and their feelings-“

“I don’t have a girlfriend Miss.” Yoongi interrupted her softly, slightly taken aback by her sudden assumption. Truth was he spent a night sleeping on an uncomfortable floor and got no more than four hours of sleep altogether, but he couldn’t tell her that.

“Oooh, come on you kid, you can’t lie to me! You’ve changed so much for the last couple of months and all for the better. Only love can do that to you sweety.” Mrs. Minkyung retorted knowingly and the smile on his face only showed how convinced she was in her own words.

“No, really I don’t-“

“Yoongi, you’ve got a customer.” His manager interrupted his attempt to speak back and motioned him to return behind the counter.

“I have to go, but call me if you need anything.” Yoongi smiled politely and bowed.

“Think again Yoongi, love can sometimes surprise you. It might be a lot closer than you think.” She said after him and even though he was already walking away, she was sure he had heard her.

Yoongi was confused and he didn’t like being confused. Love. A feeling, a state of the mind. If it had really been close, as Mrs. Minkyung implied earlier, he would’ve actually felt it, right? Or maybe not, maybe he wasn’t familiar enough with it to recognize it. Yoongi had a girlfriend before, a girlfriend that had insisted she loved him, or the person she thought he was, but that moment of his life never sparked a feeling inside of him that was memorable enough. That couldn’t have been love, right? The ever so glorified love that had millions of songs written after it, just as many movies and books made after it couldn’t be so vague and unmemorable, right? Soon after she, the person that insisted that loved Yoongi, realized he wasn’t a mysterious handsome guy that only pretended to be one for the heck of it she left him and didn’t even try understanding the real Yoongi. He never understood what his mistake was, but he didn’t even try to either. It had been a long time since Yoongi had loved.

Yoongi concluded that he definitely didn’t know enough about love to recognize it. He didn’t want to slave around the lady’s assumption anymore so he dismissed her words and tried forgetting about them. Maybe love just wasn’t anywhere near Yoongi.

The door chime rang soundly and Yoongi immediately looked at the direction of the door out of reflex.

“Welcome to “Heaven”.” Yoongi robotically said, but then laughed.

“Hi hyung.” Jimin grinned, revealing all of his teeth. He had his camera bag with him today.

A/N I'm really sorry to the people that were disappointed with yesterday's chapter and I can totally understand that ;; I promise to work harder on delivering the story and the feelings behind it better ;; I hope this update explains Yoongi's behaviour a bit more and his 'sudden' change of character doesn't bother you as much ;u; I promise more light-hearted chapters to come.

Thank you for the constant support and for putting up with me while i'm still learning and lacking so much and i'm also sorry for the numerious grammer and spelling mistakes that always seem to be there no mater how many hours i spend editing each chapter;;

It's been awhile, but picture of the day ♥ (credit)