Normal - Korean       Bold - English       Italics - Mandarin       Bold Italics - Russian       Blue - Thoughts       Red - Writings       Orange - Flashbacks

【Jay's POV】 

Kai knows, I know that he knows. And it's not just him that knows either. It's the other boys he talked to last night while the girls, the rest of the boys and I were playing at the slides with the pups. I know he can feel the pain I feel inside me because I see it in his eyes and all over his face no matter how he tries to hide it. It's been like this ever since I woke up with no memories of my past before The Ministry but I had it all under control as time went on.

But now that I'm here, it's acting up again and I can't control it. It's killing me from the inside out and I can't stop it. To be more specific, I don't know how to stop it. I feel deep within me that it has something to do with my lost memories. But I can't, for the life of me, remember anything no matter how much I try. The harder I try to get those memories back, the more my control I have on my powers slips and it's exhausting.

I'm exhausted, I'm in pain, I'm confused, I'm broken, I'm scared and I'm lost. I need answers and I need the fast because with every single day that passes, my control starts to slip. I already nearly lost it during the test, I don't want to completely lose it the next time. Throughout the entire test that required any form of fighting or concentration, I had no control over myself.

I'm horrified because I knew what I was doing throughtout the test and I desperately wanted to see blood and lots of it. I had acted and reacted with the intention to kill anyone and everyone who so much as said a hateful thing about me and I managed to hear it. I don't want to become a monster again. I'm fighting a battle that I can never win on my own, but I don't know who to turn to or who I can trust.

I'm ashamed of myself because deep inside me I'm blaming the boys who I've come to love and care for with all my heart despite only knowing them for a week. My affections for them is growing with every passing minute and that's when I feel myself slipping even more without even using my abilities. I hate myself for blaming such wonderful boys who've been nothing but nice and accomodating to me and have been taking care of my sisters when I couldn't.

I'm disgusted at how I could feel this way. I hate this all. I want it all to stop. I need this all to stop. And now I wish Kai were here, I feel a bit more in control whenever he's around and it's comforting. In fact, I feel a lot more in control whenever he's around as compared to when my sisters are around. Is this what a bond can do to someone? I don't know. I was raised not knowing anyone of my kind apart from Krys, Jo and Jess.

Over the past week, I managed to hack into the Azarian records and found out my parents were Kwon Daeho and Vera Kwon they were literally ancient like over 2000 years old ancient. I couldn't find anything about the 13 Crowns or their children. I know I'm one of them since my mother is a member of the 13 Crowns council. But I don't know who the remaining twelve are and my Uncles aren't much help at all since they won't tell me .

Right now, I'm scouring the tombs in the Valley of the Kings in Egypt where I had found out contained hieroglyphics about Azarians and I will collect every information there is. I even resorted to duplicating myself to cover all the tombs  and I can feel my control slipping more as time went on. I've been here for nearly eight hours now and I'm nearly done with it. I just have a couple more walls of hieroglyphics and I'm done which will only take half an hour tops.

Why am I rushing? Because I promised Tao that I would explain everything when I get back home from my trip, without telling anyone where I was going or what I was doing, and I never break any of my promises. I know what it's like to be betrayed, backstabbed and all that because I've been a victim of it and, though I'm not proud of it, have done it as well and I hated myself so much for it that I became self-destructive for a couple years.

♣♥♠♦

【Kris' POV】

It's eight in the morning and Minseok, Joonmyeon, Kyungsoo, Kai and I are in the palace where we grew up together and where the Blue Bloods lived to pay a visit to our parents while Luhan, Yixing and Baek stayed behind on campus to help provide an alibi if the other younger members asked where we were and why we left so early. Kai had left the house on campus at around six to check on Jay and came back telling us that she would be back by around three in the afternoon which gave us seven hours with our parents.

"Yi Fan! You've arrived! Come! Let's talk in the drawing room. Your fathers are all there." My mother, Lady Wu Shiying, greeted us from the top of the grandstaircase the moment Kai teleported us to the eastwing of the palace where our families as the council lived and gestured for us to follow her to the drawing room where our fathers all stopped short of their conversations as we entered and my mother left.

"Yi Fan! What brings you boys back home? Is everything okay in school? Anyone found a mate yet" My father, Lord Kevin Wu, said while gesturing us to have a seat and I noted the teasing tone in his voice as he asked his last question which made the five of us shift uncomfortably while Kai looked as his feet. The five of us sat down on the couch together and across all twelve fathers and looked at each other awkwardly.

"Everything is fine in school for all of us, Uncle Wu. We have a slight problem that requires your advices... It's about... It's about Jongin's mate..." Suho spoke up as confidently as he could but it wasn't hard to detect the awkwardness in his tone and looking at our fathers, they were extremely shocked. I wouldn't blame them since it's one of the youngest members who found a mate first and not Suho and I who were the Alphas of the pack.

"Jongin's mate? She must be one heck of a woman to tame this playboy I call my son then." Kai's father, Lord Kim Jonghoon, spoke up while chuckling which made us shift uncomfortably again. This is getting extremely awkward even by my standards and I'm really good at handling awkward situations so that's saying something. When the elders saw our expressions, they started frowning slightly, kicking their teasing sides to the curb.

"That's what we needed your advice on. Yixing, Luhan and Baekhyun would've come with us but someone had to look after the other members as well." I explained, gauging their reactions really closely as this would be an extremely senstive topic to us seeing as we're highly attracted to Jay in more than just the ual level of attraction.

"I don't know as much as Yixing does but I know enough to know that there's something awfully wrong going on in her body. It's like she's a ticking timebomb that explode without any prior warning." Minseok continued and all was silent as we let the information sink into the elders' minds and I could literally see the wheels turning in their heads and from my peripheral vision, I saw Kai staring blankly at his clasped hands resting on his lap which would occasionally make a small twitch.

"Define 'something wrong', son. Because that isn't enough for us to offer you any helpful advice." Lord Kim Kwangmin, Minseok's father, spoke after a pregnant pause as the elders occasionally exchanged looks with each other before glancing at Kai and us and then repeating the cycle all over again. This is really getting awkward and Kai isn't even doing so much as moving except for the occasionally twitching his fingers did.

"She's dying... Something in her is breaking her so much that she's dying because of it... She's in so much pain... She feels exhausted, confused, scared, lost and broken... She can't remember anything from her past and she wants, with everything she has, to remember but every single time she tries to remember, it makes her control slip a little bit more... She doesn't know what to do, doesn't know who to turn to and doesn't know how to trust anyone and who to trust." Kai spoke up and I knew then that he was telling us everything Jay was feeling.

I observed the elders again and saw fear, understanding and recognition flash across their faces with every word Kai had spoken. All twelve of them knew something and this could be a break for us to help Jay and save her from self-destructing on herself because of whatever crap is going on in her body. I'll do whatever it takes to save her and even if that meant going through hell and back.

"More than that, she's like this ball of pure energy that's trapped in a tiny glass box. And I think that's what's causing all the problems in her body but I can't be too sure because she rarely even uses her abilities." Joonmyeon spoke up next and I saw Kai twitching again and reached over to grasp onto his arms to which he gave me a grateful smile which I returned with a nod of my head.

"Her control is slipping again... She's thinking that her lost memories are the reason this is happening to her... She hates herself because she blamed us for this happening to her, at one point because she had absolute control until she entered the school and met us... She finds it comforting when I'm around her cause she has complete control... And now she's threatening to kick my when we get back on campus for telling you this..." Kai said absentmindedly before snapping his head up upon realizing he told us things we didn't need to know.

But it hurt a little to know that Jay had blamed us even if she had a valid reason for it. Hearing that she was going out of control when she met us, I wondered why she never hated us for it but instead hated herself because she blamed us. I barely even know her and I find her to be an extremely nice and warm person. Seeing how she treats Amber and the Jung sisters, it was obvious that she's nice, warm, affectionate and very protective.

"You know something. You know something and you're not telling us." Minseok suddenly growled while looking at the elders seated in front of us and the temperature in the room dropped at an alarming rate which brought my attention to the elders who were tense and fidgety at the same time.

"Calm down, son. Let us get some things straight first before we can explain things." Lord Kim Minjun, Joonmyeon's father, said calmly as the temperature gradually went back to normal as Joonmyeon placed a hand on Minseok's shoulder to calm him down a little while Kyungsoo looked like a lost little owl with how wide his eyes were as he looked at the elders.

"What do you know about Jongin's mate? Or, actually, what did Jongin's mate tell you about herself?" Lord Zhang Jinghui, Yixing's father, asked while leaning back into his armchair with a slight frown on his face which reminded me a lot of Yixing whenever he was deep in thoughts.

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter