Haeun's POV:

I felt frozen to the spot. I stared at Luhan's chest to see if his chest would rise and fall, but it didn't. It was still and unmoving. 

"Lulu...luhan-oppa..." I choked on my words as quiet tears fell down my cheeks. All of the memories involving him were suddenly flashing in my head left and right making me cry even more. Luhan...you idiot...your such an idiot.....what am I gonna do?....what the hell am I going to do?....I'm so stupid...I can't believe I forgot you.....I can't....

The letters in my hand crumpled in my hand making me jump out of my delusion. I could already imagine him scolding me for crinkling the letters and not reading them so I turned away from him and started to read the next letter. It was from our mom.

To My Dearest Daughter,

Haeun-ah. I'm sure you've found out by now that you're not our actual daughter....I'm sorry. I'm sorry for keeping it from you this whole time....your mother and father....they would have loved to have you as their daughter. I know it. Maybe this is karma? I don't know....by the time you recieve this letter, I'll already be back in China. I know you won't want to see me....don't be mad at Luhan. He told me to tell you the truth from the start, but it didn't happen that way....He really cherishes you like a little sister. Don't worry about me or your dad. We'll give you some time to think over everything....Luhan will stay with you so I don't think I'll worry as much....Saranghae Haeun. 

-Mom

I bit my lip to keep my tears from flowing out like a river. I flipped to the next page and it was a birthcertificate except more complex. Like what I liked to eat, what I liked to do, who I was in love with or was suppose to be in love with, what I liked in general, things like that. 

"What have i done.." i cried out loud. I could hear footsteps running up the stairs frantically and I heard someone gasp.

"Haeun-ah, you okay?!" D.O ran over to me and lifted my head to see my face. "Yah, yah, don't cry..."

He hugged me and I cried even more.

"K-kyungsoo...I'm such an idiot," i cried. "I'M AN IDIOT."

"Sh," D.O my hair and patted my back. "He...He's gone isn't he?"

I coughed my words and instead nodded as I cried into his shoulder. 

*Flashback*

"His fans made you cry again huh," Kyungsoo spoke to me as he rubbed my back. Little tears rimmed my eyes as my head hung. 

"I can't do it Kyungsoo....I can't..." I whimpered as I let my head sink lower into my knees. 

"Should I sing for you?" he asked. I didn't reply and he started to sing anyway. 

Nawa isseul ttae neon pyeonanhae
Sido ttaedo eobsi jangnanhae
Hayan useum useul ttaemada ah~

Geureon ne maeumeun yes or no
Naege saineul jwo x or o
Jaemieobseo gidarineun geon yeah

He tried to rap Jongin's part and I ended up laughing a little.

"What? Aren't I good at rapping?" He frowned. I looked up at him from my knees and smiled weakly. 

"Gomowo Kyungsoo-ah," I whispered quietly. 

"Anytime," he smiled his heart smile. 

*End of FLashback*

I pulled away from him first and wiped my tears with the back of my hand. 

"MIanhae...I got your shirt all wet..." I rubbed my eyes. 

"Aniyo....it's okay, it brings back old times," he smiled softly. "Remember?"

I nodded. 

"Yeah..." I replied holding onto the letters in my hand. I had forgotten about the necklace in my other hand and almost dropped it. 

"Do the letters really contain your memories?" he asked staring at the letters. 

"I dunno...I can't tell if their real or not.." I said handing the letters to him. He read them trhough thoroughly and quietly while I tried not to look back at Luhan who was long gone. 

"Lu-ge?" I heard Tao's voice suddenly. I turned around and saw Tao looking at us, his eyes bulging with panic. 

"No...he's...he's alive right? He's just sleeping right?" Tao said rather quickly. "HE HAS TO BE ALIVE."

I shook my head no. 

"He's...no--"

"NO. He'll wake up...yeah...we'll all wake up from this horrible dream and go back home....and then Haeun will remember all of us and....and we'll be happy...yeah.." Tao said in gibberish.

"Tao-ah, stop," D.O looked at Tao with sorrowful eyes. "He's not here anymore."

Tao's facial expression practically killed me inside. Before I could stop my body, I stood up and hugged him. It was hard to reach around his neck since he was so tall, but I managed to do it by tippy toeing. He pulled my arms off slowly and pu them around his waist instead and THEN hugged me back. He squeezed me making me let out a little squeak(?).

"Waeyo?" he seemed to whisper. "Why us?"

I bit my bottom lip holding back tears.

"Haeun....our haeunnie....I don't think I can do this....I really...."

"Don't talk anymore," I said my voice shaking. "I....I can't let any more of you die...I'm just starting to get my memories back...if...if you leave me, i don't think i'd be able to live with myself knwoing I'd seen all of you die..."

He released me first, his eyes red and poofy, but a small smile was there. 

"I really can't Haeun," he muttered as his eyes searched for something on the ground. Something in my gut felt scared and I tackled him. 

"NO!!" I yelled.

"Haeun!" D.O called as he ran over to us picking me up off of Tao who was dazed. "Are you okay!?"

"HE'S GONNA KILL HIMSELF!!" I yelled trashing around. "I'M NOT LETTING THAT HAPPEN!"

After 5 minutes, I didn't struggle anymore and eventually gave up the fight with him. Tao sat up on the floor his head dangling. 

"I'll...I'll keep an eye on him," D.O released me. "You..you go tell the members what's going on...can you do that for me?"

I grumbled a yes and silently walked downstairs. The huge burden of Luhan's death weighed me down so much. Right when I was in sight of everyone, they all stood up to watch me. I looked at the nearest person to me which was Baekhyun and furrowed my eyebrows.

"He's...."

"Dead?" Chanyeol finsihed my sentence. I flinched at the word 'dead' and said nothing more.

"Dammit," Kai cursed as he hit the wall with his fist. "DAMMIT."

"There's...6 left...one more and Haeun will--"

"Shut up Baekhyun," Jongdae threatend. "Don't touch her."

Baekhyun looked at my apologetic.

"Mian..." he murmured as he stumbled on his sprained ankle. 

"Where's D.O and Tao?" Chanyeol asked his eyes showing signs of worry.

"Upstairs....we...need you upstairs to take L-....his body downstairs," I sighed. I couldn't even say his name anymore because I was still in shock.

"Tao must have freaked out," Chen muttered. 

"I'll...go help bring him down," Chanyeol said as he walked upstairs. Kai slowly followed behind giving me looks of worry as well. The necklace in my hand tightened.

"TAO-AH, I SWEAR TO GOD, PUT THAT DOWN!!" I heard Kyungsoo yell. I sprinted up stairs to see Tao over D.O holding a piece of a shard from what seemed like a mirror.

"YAH YAH!" Chanyeol screamed as he tackled Tao. Kai and I immeditally sprang into action and grabbed D.O off the ground. 

"What the hell happened?! He went crazy in less than 5 minutes!" Kai spoke checking D.O for any other injuries.

"He said he needed to use the bathroom and came back with a broken piece of glass in his hand...he tried to kill me..." D.O said as if in denial. "He tried to kill me..."

Tao was struggling against Chanyeol but eventually threw him off and ran off back into the bathroom. I ran after him just as he closed and locked the door. 

"TAO!! OPEN PLEASE!" I yelled and banged on the door. "Oh my god, PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR TAO!"

"Move Haeun!" Kai said as he ran forward trying to kick down the door, but failed. He continued kicking it, but it only made loud cracking noises. Inside, we could hear nothing.

"HUANG ZITAO!" Chanyeol screamed. "DON'T YOU DARE SUICIDE ON ME, DO YOU HEAR ME?!"

"Hyung...mothae....jjinjja mothaeyo..." we heard Tao whimper. 

"Please just open the door..." I cried in a whisper my head resting on the door. "Please....jebal..."