"Thanks for coming with me, Haruna-chan. I need your help for this to work," Ryosuke looked at Haruna with sincerity. he parked his car at the top of a hill and walked towards a man who stood confidently against the sunlight. the sun was blinding but the Man's aura was strong enough to sense who the person is. 

"ah... you're here... and you brought another girl" Reno smirked.

Ryosuke clenched his fist and was about to swing it but Haruna held him back with a subtle shaking of her head as disapproval.

"you should be glad I'm here, or he would have pushed you down this hill and rid this world from your ills," Haruna said crudely. Ryosuke increasingly felt confident that he has called her along cause she indeed is sensible and reckless at the same time, which is exactly what he needed now. Reno gave a look of irritation and that made Ryosuke feel partially accomplished.

"lets just get to the point. you planned it that night, am I right..." Ryosuke asked with her teeth gritted tightly.

"you're smarter than most idols. I would think you'll retarded to believe I have no part to play in this... yes, I spiked your drink. yes, I left the 2 of you bare on the comfy bed. I wanted her to myself but I granted your unspoken temptations, you should thank me gratefully."

"you, son of a ! you loved her, yet you hurt her this way!" Ryosuke swing his arm towards his face, fortunately Haruna caught him before he lands a finger on Reno. "Yamada-kun, he is not worth getting yourself into trouble..." she has heard Ryosuke has great strength and was an eye-opening experience to feel it for herself. His veins was visibly clear and bulging on his tough arms, and such a domineering image which contrast heavily from his usual friendly image makes her heart skip twice. She saw Ryosuke's eyes glitter with 
unconditional love and protection for Umika, and found him even more attractive than he already is.

"how sure are you that she felt hurt. she could possibly be thanking me in her heart that I create such opportunity to satisfy her feministic lust."

"You!!!! Umika isn't what you described! she's the purest, loving and kind-hearted girl I know!"

"then she wouldn't so brutally shove me aside! anyway, I should correct your false accusation, you are the one hurting her now, not me... her status ity is unknown, her relationship with you is at stake, her reputation may be tarnished forever if your tobbikos,or whatever your fans are called, know about that night."

Ryosuke seemed dejected by the last part of Reno's intimidating lines. The latter smirked and trailed off after leaving behind a warning "i wonder how it will be like if your fans saw the photo..." Haruna knew Reno said this to make sure Ryosuke and Umika stay in a state of paranoia and live in solitude.

Ryosuke's anger surged as he saw Reno's confident departure. Haruna gave him a soft pat and he forced a smile upon his face just so she wouldn't worry. but his phone rang... 

"Chinen?"

the reply came as a soft whisper which caused Ryosuke's uneasiness... "Ryosuke, you better come to agency now. urgent."

"what's going on?"

"Johnny-san asked for a meeting with JUMP and Umika..."

"huh?! I didn't receive any notice"

"you wouldn't. cause it's meant to exclude you."

"C-Chi... what is he doing?" Ryosuke trembled in fear, he never felt that fearful in his life. 

"Ryosuke..." Chinen sounded troubled and that was enough to convince him that it is nothing good. He disengaged from his call, knowing that it would put Chinen in a spot if the conversation was to go on. it was also because he was in such anxiety that he himself can't speak another word. Haruna saw how much Ryosuke pales in comparison to minutes ago and became genuinely worried.

"Ryosuke? what's wrong?" 

the moment she uttered those words, it was as if it called back his soul. regaining his concentration, his face turned serious and then he uttered solemnly "I have to go... thank you for today, Haruna-chan. if it wasn't for you, I'll have caused more problems to myself."

"it's okay... but is something wrong, you looked pale" 

"i hope nothing happens" he emotionlessly expressed then sped off. Haruna eyelids jumped profusely as though she foresaw something bad is about to happen. 

*****
"Umika Kawashima-san, could you come to Johnny's entertainment building today at noon? Kitagawa-san would like to meet you" an unfamiliar voice echoed through the phone. She felt a chill rang down her spine and replied in a comparatively weak voice ".... it's about me and Ryosuke?..." she was certain that it's bad news.

"... yes...but Kitagawa-san like to meet you alone to discuss the way forward. so I would ask of you not to tell him."

"I know. I'll come over now..." Umika's voice was trembling more and couldn't wait to disengage the call.

"See you., Umika-san"

The conversation lingers in her mind over and over again and even up till the point where she stood in front of the legendary man who gave off a stern aura, she still couldn't predict what was about to hit her. she was overwhelmed not only by him but by the 8 intimidating stares surrounding her, of course not all of which were unfriendly. she saw the soft, sympathetic glances of her school mates Chinen and Yuto, the ones who knew all about their secrets, and Daiki who showed the most worrisome gaze. Despite so, she felt like she's about to suffocate and pass out in this tense, uncertain atmosphere. she prayed for Ryosuke to be here to ease her anxiety but at the same time she started to think how they come to such situation... they used to be able to laugh and act rudely to one another, now they became so deliberately emphasised in each other's life, she began to miss the old times where nothing seemed to matter.

She wrenched the sides of her skirt as she waited for the old man to speak his words of supposed wisdom. 

"Umika Kawashima-san..." he spoke slowly but with full of certainty and confidence.

"hai..." her voice quavered in stark comparison.

"i believe you have known Yamada as long as he has joined the agency as a Junior... that's really rare for friendships to last so long even if we are not talking about a celebrity."

she nodded uncomfortably.

"then you should also know how hard he has worked to be able to climb this far in his career. I'll be honest with you, Yamada Ryosuke is one of the shinning stars for this generation of young idols in our agency. we have vested interest in exploring further opportunities for him, such as movie. he has potential... but the nature of the work is delicate such that a wrong move, albeit as trivial as it can be, could ruin everything. we've seen our own artistes fall because of their own careless doing and we've seen them regret"

Still, Umika nodded, but her nodding became heavier and her shoulders felt increasingly burdened.

"yamada is the center of Jump and this means any unfortunate events that happened to him will affect the group... right Yabu-kun?"

Umika didn't dare shift her gaze to Yabu. she didn't know the leader well, in fact, Daiki was the only one she knew well in BEST. Yabu however went right in front of her and only spoke when she sets her gaze at him. his voice was assertive and firm.

"Umika-san... alot of us are jealous of Ryosuke having a best friend like you. but at times, we're also very worried for the 2 of you, especially you, cause you might get hurt because of him. we never expected such things to happen... so we are genuinely saddened by the unfortunate incident. you may think I'm very cruel to say this, but it seemed to be better for both of you that you guys take a time off. as the leader of JUMP, I sincerely hope you could leave him for the time until you two tide over this. at least with you away, we need not worry about your emotional well-being while we try to pull him up from the mess. and without you around, we can think of more backup plans to salvage the issue if it breaks out. we are clearly trapped in a uncertain situation that it's better we prepare for the worst. Umika-san, I hope you understand... see it as a fallow period for your seedling of love... if you two can survive this tough period, your love would be strong and all these would have been worthwhile. if you guys fail to return to each other then, it's at least you guys won't regret having left each other."

"Oi, Yabu... stop saying.. it's hurting," Daiki stood out and pulled Yabu back, but Yabu retaliated and shook away Daiki's grip.

"I understand..." her voice was weak and was cracking, but her words seemed certain that it shocked everyone in the room. Chinen and Yuto exchanged glances of sympathy. Daiki saw tears welling in her eyes and her fingers wrenching her skirt tighter than before. he could see she's painfully holding back, but he could only helplessly watch her.

"Umika, we can think of something else... you don't have to accept Yabu's suggestion. it's just a suggestion. if the 9 of us can't think of something, we can ask Suzuka, Mirai, Miku and the rest of our close friends.... we are sure to think of a foolproof solution." Yuto spoke, and Chinen and Daiki nodded in agreement.

"I created enough trouble... it's all my fault all of this happen so i should set things right. I shouldn't have told him I love him, then none of this would happen..." Umika's suppressed cries could be heard loud and clear. her cracking voice made their hearts cringed but for the sake of the group and the young boy, Yabu tried his best to harden his heart. then came a loud slam on the door, there stood a guy filled with conflicting emotions of betrayal, anger and sorrows.

"Ryosuke?" Chinen was first to call out. but Ryosuke's eyes were fixated at Umika's as though the world froze momentarily. His fist clenched tight and his jaw gritted. 

Her lips trembled when she uttered his name. she's never seen such fierce expression transpired from him, not even when they quarrel. 

He stormed into the room without diverting his gaze, instead it seemed it has been set ablaze. He took her by her wrist and grip it so hard it reddened instantly. She gasped and then let out a call for distress, "it hurts, Ryosuke..." but he didn't loosen his grip. He shifted his gaze at Yabu and Kitagawa and said coldly, "whoever who tries to take things away from me, especially behind my back, I will never forgive, not even my most respectable big brother and my most admirable boss"

Ryosuke dragged Umika out with his hand tightly enclosed around her reddened wrist, disregarding her pleas and the calls from his buddies which echoed down the corridor. He pulled her past several alleys and bents, and finally a secluded underground pedestrian.

"it hurts!" Umika let out a loud cry to catch his attention and she was surprised he finally turned back to her and released her wrist. he took a peek at her bruised wrist. 

"then what you did to me just now is 10 or even 100times worst than me! how could you even accede to their request! how could you choose to leave me! you know you're my only best friend! and now, you are the only one I love!" Tears rushed through his eyes rapidly. it jerked Umika's tears even more and they both ended up in a watershed.

"Ryosuke... but if I caused you your career, you'll soon regret... then you might start bearing a grudge against me and eventually detest my presence... Ryosuke, I don't dare to see that happen, cos you are as important to me. Yabu-kun is right, if we split up for the time being and not see each other, we may be more able to consider our options and there'll be less regrets."

"no no no! what are you talking about?!!! if I don't see you anymore, that's a bigger regret!" 

"but the reason why you haven't contacted me it's because you don't know how to face me too, isn't it!"

"that you're wrong! it's not because I didn't dare face you, it's because I wanted to be sure I could protect both you and my career!"

Umika was touched beyond words. They remained silent for a brief moment with their eyes transpiring heartbreaking cries.

"I don't want you to protect me every single time, Ryosuke... it's my fault this time.. I brought Reno in between us, I know he caused the whole incident and planned to put your career in jeopardy. let me watch over you this time, please..."

"you've protected me all this while, Umika, by staying as my best friend and my sweetheart and walking through the most difficult road with me... so there's no wrong in me protecting you as well"

"you protect me, I protect you... we have already become each other's burden! we will never have a solution to all these. our love is gonna be invisible to other's eyes and that has already proved to hurt us. I can't tell people you're my boyfriend, and you can't let others know I'm yours. I sit at the bottom of the stage at your concert, and I realised how no matter how much I shout, you cannot see me nor hear me. it hits me how far you are to me... it makes me wonder if you dating Mirai will be much better. people love the two of you, and she's close to you as well, and she can understand your work much better than me!"

Ryosuke recalled the search that Umika did on her phone, and that term 'yamashi' appeared to have bothered her all these while. he walked forth and grabbed her arms wholeheartedly with a deep gaze.

"Umika, we can do it, we can circumvent every problem we faced, and we have come so far, didnt we? we have been through so much and I can't imagine my life without you..."

Umika's warm tears rolled down profusely, likewise with his. Umika's heart wavered at his glistening face, but clenched her fist and hardened her heart. She led her hands to his flawless complexion and brush away those angel tears of his, then tracing her fingers across his forehead and sweeping his bangs away to reveal his tightly knitted brows and glittering eyes filled with precious tears. She leaned closer and pressed her chapped lips against his, and their eyes closed to enjoy the temporal tranquility and listen into each other's heavy heartbeat. 

She painstakingly pulled herself away gradually and with a cracking tone, she uttered, "Ryosuke... maybe we have been so comfortable with hanging out together that we have failed to notice the better people around us. if we can just take a break and admire our surroundings, perhaps we realise there are so many more people who could replace us in each other's heart."

"n-no way... Umika... I love you so much. if you go away from me, I won't be able to do anything... I'm not gonna let this happen. I'm not gonna let you leave! not now, not ever! That night's issue, we'll work it out. really, trust me!" Ryosuke tightened his grip, afraid she'll disappear from his eyes.

"it's not that issue anymore. in fact, it triggered me to think how incompatible we are, and how some of our issues will never be resolved. sorry, Ryosuke, please let go." she wrenched her hand from his firm grip and looked at him with immense sorrows. 

"how could you say this so easily! I don't want you to go!"

"it's not gonna be easy for me too, Ryosuke. but it's the best option for us from now..." Umika backed away as she saw him moving closer.

"goodbye Ryosuke!"

"Umika!!!!" he chased after her, and she ran as fast as she could, from streets to streets, alleys to alleys, crossing roads after roads. She saw a huge crossroad in front of her, and was appalled at how this particular crossroad reflected what their blossoming love faced. She turned around and saw his ever strong perseverance. 

"sorry" she uttered under her short breathes and rapid tears. She dashed towards the crossroad.

She was sure it was the pedestrians' turn to cross, but she was shocked that when she looked up again at the traffic light once she's half way in the center of the busy traffic, it was the vehicle's rite of way. Despite her clouded view from her flooded eyes, she could see a speeding car coming right at her. Her limbs weren't listening to her bidding in this state of shock.Her mind when blank instantly like as though she suffered a blackout. She could only hear a faint echo of her name uttered in the most soothing way. she love how her name was said, she love how her name, for a moment, belongs exclusively to him and him alone. 

"aieru, Ryosuke... I'm sorry, I love you, but thank you for everything..." her mind flash backed many memories. like old sayings, a person on her deathbed would relive some of the precious moments of her life... she is finally  able to verify it's validity.

With the loud car honk filling the air and the blinding headlight that stinged her eyes, she felt her whole body flung mercilessly far across the road, braising her skin against the tough surface. she could feel blood oozing out from her arms. she could feel her body dipped in a pool of warm blood and it wasn't an exaggeration. even without seeing for herself, she knew such bloody scene would have be accompanied by excruciating pain that would kill her within seconds from impact, but she was confused how it didn't felt so. perhaps she has lost her nervous system back then, perhaps she's already partially paralyzed such that any amount of pain cannot be felt. but this was also far from truth... as her fingers twitched, she could feel something warm entwined with it, and that something felt like it was from a living. focusing more albeit her shut eyes, she realised it wasn't the rough road she's lying on, instead she felt a warm cushion beneath her. a soft thumping, similar to that of the heartbeat of a old man, was heard clearly through my ears. oddly, the rhythmic pumping was music to my ears and somewhere it felt deeply reliving. furthermore, a familiar scent comforted her tensed mind and numbed her pain. 

It was as if Ryosuke was right by her side, just like old times. she could also imagine those frequently occurring scenes where he enveloped her in his arms to comfort the weeping girl and pat her softly to hush her cries. in her subconscious mind, she heard the voice she yearned for especially in a time of life and death, the voice that never fails to give her strength and support whenever she needs... "you will be okay..."

the next moment, she cringed when a strong force uplifted her from the soft cushion and onto a cold, heartless bed. there were loud gasping around her, and she couldn't make out what was the situation. She heard the activation of the CPR machine and thought to herself if she was dead.  

"Clear! *THUMP" she heard but did not feel the impact. She struggled to regain consciousness as soon as she became certain there was someone else besides her...and this person's life is much dire... Fear crept up her spine as she pieced together those many circumstantial hints... there could only be one person who make her heart beat this way....and the only one who would always be there for her.