Humanity's Code

by: flamzfox

Genre: Romance/Angst/Sci-Fi

Main Character(s): Kris/Lay/Suho

Contains: 

Chapter(s): One (Now turned into eight/Completed)

Summary:   In the twenty third century, you were born with a mortal enemy. Your entire life you struggled against said enemy until in the end, one of you won and the other died. It was quite literally, a war for survival.

For Kris, winning required the creation of a code that would craft the essence of his enemy’s dead lover. Three years poured into one project. Three years and Kris had succeed. He had successfully created a program so humanlike it was difficult to see it as anything but human.

But there were holes. The code was mutating itself. The code had a life of its own. It was alive.

Test subject 2034, Zhang Yixing, was human.

Kris had created a human being.

Title ★★★★★

The title really is brilliant! It kinda tells you what the story is about but at the same time it doesn't. You can clearly hear it screaming "Sci-Fi" but the rest is a little bit of a blur, making any reader wanna click that link...at least the curious ones such as I ;P I looked at the search in AFF and this is the ONLY story named like this, so more kudos for originality! :D

Plot ★★★★★

I don't even know how to start. This plot was really brilliant (I don't think there's another word to describe this story so you might get tired of it cause I will keep on repeating it a few more times). The story really had some new twists and turns that drives any reader to madness point!!! Like wow! At first I thought one thing and then it ended in a way that I might thought it would but I had my mind in complete denial (cause even though I love angst stories and most of them end up in a sad ending, I hoped that maybe...juuust maybe the author will have a change of heart and finish it in a slight happy ending. So, yeah at one point I thought Kris was actually Suho and Suho was Kris and Kris was the enemy of Lay whom Lay made him to go talk with Suho so he would choose him over his family but Kris was jealous and actually even though Lay was his enemy he fell in love with him and didn't want to see him with Suho and since he couldn't have him, no one will and so he made Suho forget him and tell him that his name was Kris instead of Suho and made Lay lose and die but then he went on regretting it so he wanted him back and made Suho (Kris) revive him and then everything would be reveal once he apologized to him and die for him (yeah, I know. I over analize things too much and make a huge plot of my own >.< sorry that's just how I am! XD LOL) But then, when Kris took Lay to Suho and stuff...my mind kept going to the real ending you used but I just hoped....oh well... -.- it was still good...well, more than good! BRILLIANT! (Told you I would over-use this word XD)

Grammar ★★★★★

There were very few typos, like you repeated words two times and such but overall, the grammar was perfect! Sadly, I'll have to take a little star from you ONLY because your story sadly can't be really count as a true "one-shot" fiction. According to the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America, a short fiction has a word count of maximum 7,500 words (that's between 14 to 15 pages). Unfortunately, your story has 14,470 words and according to you that's 33 pages. Meaning your story should be considered a chaptered story than a one shot. One of the reasons why I took time in reading was because of this. It just took too long to scroll, and scroll and scroll and see that it's never ending. This will possibly make the reader not want to read such a great story as yours! It's really a downside for you and as advice, I think you should consider making it as such, you wrote this for a contest I saw but I guess the contest is done, right? So I guess there should not be any problem now? As I was saying, readers tend to want to have an amazing story with twists but also that final "cliffhanger" that you certainly have, you have even divided the story by it! So even you yourself know it that this should be chaptered. Also readers like fast reading and having such a long one-shot will make the reading a bit slower for us. I mean, imagine a great book that only had one reaaally loooong page?!!! We need to pass that page every now and then! ;) 

Originality ★★★★★

I have NEVER seen anything like this in here! EVER! Like the only story close enough to this, is the one I wrote called "My Fair Lady" (which ironically the exo members I used were Lay, Suho and Kris). I also used androids but the plot is different, the whole program explanation is different and the world involving them is entirely different too (since also the genre besides Sci-Fi and Romance is ). And there is also an OC involve. YES! I'm making you want to go read it! SO GO! XD Hahaha, naw I kid! Well, I wouldn't mind but that's up to you! ;P