"MAN'S REAL LIFE IS HAPPY, CHIEFLY BECAUSE HE IS EVER EXPECTING THAT IS SOON WILL BE SO." - Edgar Allan Poe

EUNHYUK POV

The weather is very nice today. Too nice that even if I wanted to deny it, I can’t. The wind passes by in my face, giving such a relaxing feeling. If today is a normal day, I could’ve totally relax and enjoy the rest of the day lazing around with Junsu. But I couldn’t do so because today after six months I will visit Seunghyun’s graveyard.

I turn to Junsu who’s walking next to me, his eyes affixed to the ground. That night when I found out everything about Donghae and his “fake” death, I was devastated. I even throw the nearest thing my hand reached. The room turned to a complete mess. I guess Junusu heard me from downstairs because he barged into the room, eyes searching for me immediately. He held me close to him and assured me that everything’s gonna be fine.

As I’m watching him intently, he looks over to me with a faint smile on his face.

“You okay?” he put his arm around my shoulder for support.

I rest my head on his shoulder, “I’m okay. Don’t worry.”

We continue to walk our way towards the prominent tombstone up the hill.

Few minutes later, we finally reached our destination. Junsu handed me the flower basket and starts walking to the direction of a wooden bench under a century old maple tree. Maybe that’s his way of giving us privacy.

I pay respect by giving three deep bows before finally settling myself on top of the grass. I run my fingers on the black and white picture and the inscription written on it.

Even though God granted us such little time together, in our hearts you shall remain and always be loved by us.

CHOI SEUNGHYUN

November 4, 1986 – August 18, 2018

“Honey, did you miss me? This is the first time I’m visiting you after six months. I’ve read your letter and I will not hide the fact that I’m hurt and felt betrayed. How can you be that cruel to us? For five years you made me believe that Donghae is dead but in reality he wasn’t really gone. Is that love for you? Is hurting someone you cared for called love? As much as I wanted to hate you again, I really can’t. You know why? Because in those years that I carry the name of Aiden Choi you made me feel loved and accepted. Never in those five years you neglected me even if I showed you the worst things I’m capable of doing. You never get exhausted with my tantrums. You understand me more than I understand myself and most importantly you loved me more than you love yourself. With that I’m thankful to you, honey.”

Salty tears escape my eyes but it didn’t bother me in continuing.

“It took me this long to come up with a decision but I think this is the right time to... go back to Korea. You were the reason that I stayed here for so long and now that you’re gone, I think it’s time for me to find Ryeowook and to re-unite with Donghae. The mansion will be taken care of William alongside with your other properties. It will take time for me to visit you again but rest assured that I’ll always find time to pray for you. Be good there okay? Kiss mom and dad for me.”

With the back of my hand, I wipe the tears that stained my face and slowly pull myself up.

“I love you, Seunghyun.” I carefully remove our wedding ring and place it on top of his tomb. Again, I pay respect for the last time and start to walk away. Upon my third step, a cool breeze envelopes me as I heard someone whispers on my ear, “I love you, Hyukjae”.

-----*****-----

After visiting Seunghyun’s grave, Junsu and I went straight to the airport. Yes! Today I’ll be leaving California and go back to the land of kimchi. It’s like a dream come true for me to finally reunite with Ryeowook and Donghae after five looooong years. But of course I can’t just show myself to them because all the while they thought I’m dead. For sure they will freak out when they see me in flesh. Prior to this flight, I asked detective Kim to give me updates about the two.

Aside from the fact the he is not a LEE anymore; Ryeowook is still the same. He graduated from Inha University as Laude and he received an invitation to represent Korea in a prestigious music festival in London. From then on his career soars higher and higher. He met a lot of elite personalities from different countries making him one of the most sought after musician in every charity and social events.

Donghae is a different story though. There isn’t enough data about him which I find a little strange. Almost all information detective Kim gave me was the same before I “died”. How come it’s not updated? Was there something bad happened to him? Or perhaps a news blackout was implemented along the way? Oh gosh! I hope it isn’t the case, my poor Hae baby.

“We’re here.” I’m drifted back to reality when I heard Junsu’s voice. I mentally slap myself for spacing out for the whole time.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

“Yes I am.” I unbuckle my seatbelt and hopped down the car even before he starts interrogating me. I busied myself with unloading our baggage from the trunk and to the trolley. I don’t want to think negative things about Donghae because the mere thought of it breaks my heart which hasn’t really healed completely. 

Junsu on the other hand didn’t dare to ask me again. He just helps me with the transfer and we quietly enter the airport.

“I’ll just go on the check-in counter. Will you be fine here?” he inquires.

“Yes. After that do we have enough time to have a snack? I’m hungry.” I said, settling myself on one of the couches facing the runway of Ranch Airport.   

“That’s why you were so grumpy on the way here.” He looks at his watch, brows twitching. “I think