The hospital was small, if it could even be considered a hospital. The road has speed bumps that made Sehun cry out no matter how slow the car rolled over them. Her hand unwittingly found Kris’ and she grasped it tightly as the car bumped one last time and the bone sticking out from Sehun’s leg seemed to move painfully outwards. His long fingers folded over her smaller hand and held it firmly in place. When the car came to a smooth stop she glanced out the window and got a better look at the small place in front of them. It was more like a clinic she decided as the doors swung open. Min Ah sat up and moved as far as she could from the door as the rest picked up Sehun and carried him out. He sobbed in pain as they carried him out, his screams had faded with his energy and all he did was shake his head wildly, shoulders shaking with sobs. There was an elderly man waiting in a white lab coat, an old stretcher waiting by the door.

They placed the boy onto the stretcher and the man asked no questions as they wheeled him inside with Min Ah following close behind. A few nurses came over and immediately started assessing his wounds.

“Broken tibia… internal bleeding… trauma” The words reached her ears in bits and pieces as they pushed him behind two large white doors.

She glanced up and stared at the ‘DO NOT ENTER’ sign. The Os and N were out and the rest of the letters flickered on and off ominously.

The hours dragged on deliberately slow and it felt like they were stuck in a perpetual state of disarray. Some of them sat and some of them waited outside. Min Ah sat in chair her hands folded in front of her as she stared the ground. Kris stood beside her even though there was an empty chair next to her, but she knew it was because he wouldn’t have been able to sit still anyways. He wandered aimlessly, every so often spitting out a curse, but always coming back to stand at her side.

The doctor walked in, a frown on his face as Kris walked over to him, every muscle tense. She straightened out in her chair as she tried to catch bits of the whispers of their conversation, but could overhear nothing. Kris nodded and suddenly looked back at her over his shoulder; the doctor followed his line of sight and said something. Another doctor walked in from the hallway opposite to them, he led Luhan out by the arm and Min Ah turned to stare at him in shock. His usually delicate features were swollen and he had his arm in a sling. He caught her eye and grinned though, managing to give her a thumbs up with his uninjured hand.

A smile played at the corner of her lips as she noticed the spark of confidence in his eyes and just as fast as it had come, it was gone, replaced by a sort of unfeeling gleam. Min Ah’s lips parted in surprised as she followed his line of sight to Kris. His shoulders were slumped forward and he shook his head slowly.

“Don’t you dare tell me that!” He yelled, finally breaking the silence around him, by this time the rest of them had walked back in.

“He’s asking for you” The doctor said as he stepped aside.

Kris didn’t turn back, he couldn’t face them. He heard the shuffle of nervous footsteps behind him. He heard Luhan demand an explanation and then the rustle of clothing as someone held him back. There was something wrong about all this he decided as he walked through those large white doors.

The atmosphere changed instantly. The smell of disinfectant and blood took him instantly. It bled through and he was convinced it was seeping into every single thread of clothing. It was the smell of death; it was clinging to him with a vice grip and he stopped suddenly wanting to run from this place. Run straight into a shower that would wash all his mistakes away. He forced himself to keep going though, knowing that would be impossible. He took a left and stepped into the operating room.

He approached the younger boy cautiously. There was nothing to do, the doctor had said. That was impossible. Too much internal damage, he would need transplants in the next hour, more technicalities, words he couldn’t comprehend. He understood this though. He understood the mood, the way Sehun’s labored breathing echoed around him would be something he would never forget. He understood that death was with them.

“H-hi” The boy whispered, his lids opening with visible effort.

He stepped up to him and suddenly he wished he weren’t so tall. He felt uneasy looming over Sehun like this. It bothered him.

“I wanted… to… thank… you” He said slowly, every word taking a little bit more life out of him.

In all these years it was the first time that Kris’ eyes had begun to burn. He hated himself fin that moment. He hated himself more than anyone in this world; he was supposed to have save Sehun. To help him and he got him killed. Someone like him… would always destroy the people around him he realized with a crushing force.

“Why… did… you help me? Why… did you come get me?” He asked, his eyes gleaming with unshed tears as a thin sliver of blood ran down the corner of his lips.

“I saw me, in you” He confessed quietly, “I saw someone that was about to give up. I wanted to give you another chance at life” He finished with a bitter laugh.

“Happy… I was  happy…” Sehun commented, a sharp pain standing out from the general pain pulsing through his body. He shut his eyes tightly as a convulsion ran through his body, it morphed into a cough halfway through and finished as a desperate gasp for breath.

The doctor was already there, a fine spray of blood over his scrubs, as he leaned over Sehun’s body trying to resuscitate him. Kris stepped back quickly; it was all happening too fast he thought. There was always a speech in the movies, a speech that gave you closure… The door burst open as Luhan ran in; his eyes were red as Xiumin and Lay held him back.

“Sehun! Get up you !” He screamed, the last word being drowned out by the loud and endless tone of the machine besides him. The beats of his heart, shown by the bright moving green light dimmed as the line ran flat, the loud sound was a cruel reminder of the fact in front of their faces.

Kris closed his eyes and took five deep breaths. He opened them again and memorized what was left of Sehun before he turned back to Luhan. He screamed as they lost their grip on him and he ran forward, stopping one foot short of the operating table Sehun rested on. His eyes were closed and for once he looked at peace. Luhan turned to Kris and he didn’t miss the glint of accusation in his gaze before it was overcome by grief. He walked past Xiumin and Lay who stood in shock and stepped out into the waiting room to deliver the news.

~~~~~~~~

Min Ah felt stupid laying on the hospital bed. Apparently the doctor had insisted on giving her a full workup and that meant having to be in her own room as he examined her thoroughly. She wanted to be outside waiting with them for news of Sehun, but instead she was stuck here. She closed her eyes and decided things were going to be fine. There was a curt knock on her door and she waited as the door was pushed open and Kris walked in.

“Sehun didn’t make it” Were the first words out of his lips. She sat up, her hands gripping the flimsy blanket over her legs.

“No, we got him out. He was alive when we got him out. He was hurt, but it wasn’t deadly” She rambled on taking in the slump of his shoulders and the way his eyes seemed to check out vacantly, as if thinking about a time long before now.

“His injuries were a lot worse than we could see. He’s gone” He explained as he walked over and sat on the edge of her bed. He turned his body to her and stared. 

“Are you… are you ok?” She said, her brows furrowing with worry and her hand twitching with a need to comfort him.

“I’m fine. I wanted to thank you for helping tonight” Kris said calmly reaching for her hand with the bandages knuckles. He ran a finger along the bandages even though his touch was void.

She searched for words to say as she followed his gaze to the heart monitor on the stand besides her. His eyes slowly traveled from the machine, down the cord, to the small clip attached to her finger.

“He said just for precautions he wanted to monitor my heart rate. It’s pretty useless if you ask me. I feel fine” She said, holding up her hand for him to see.

Whatever she was about to say disappeared as he placed his hand against hers and laced his fingers with hers. He pulled her hand back down and she stared at him in silence as he leaned forward. The bed groaned under his weight as he placed a hand on the back of her neck. The heart monitor began to beep slightly faster and she turned bright red.

“I’m gonna take this thing off” She mumbled, trying to free her hand, but he instead held on tighter.

“Leave it on… please” He whispered, “I want to hear it”

He closed the distance between them easily as placed his lips against hers. He moved them insistently as the monitor beeped faster. She fell into the kiss quickly, placing a hand on his shoulders before pushing him back when a sting of pain echoed on her lips. She couldn’t help, but notice the way he glanced nervously at the heart monitor.

“It’s slowing down” He said quietly and if she didn’t know any better she could have sworn she heard a hint of panic.

“My lip still hurts” She explained pointing to the rather large cut on her lips.

Kris nodded as his eyes went back to the heart monitor. He reached for her again and this time she tried to pull back instantly.

“I said it—“ Min Ah began before gasping in surprise as his lips went straight for her neck.

The words of protest withered away instantly as his lips locked onto her soft skin and he held her tightly. One by one she could feel herself unraveling like a rose, each petal falling away faster and faster until she moaned softly arching her back into him. The bed groaned again as he climbed on with his whole body and slowly pushed her back onto the uncomfortable mattress. The monitor beeped frantically and Kris seemed hell bent on matching it. His lips moved lower until they reached her collarbone. They glided towards the center and she felt the sudden cool contact with the old sheets.

“Stop…” She whimpered with no force behind the words. They both knew she didn’t really want him to, but as she felt her hospital gown being pulled an inch lower she was suddenly aware of the situation.

Someone had just died. The monitor beeped wildly in the background as she firmly pushed him away. An unwanted shudder ran through her at the sudden lack of heat on her body and she blinked the embarrassment away. Kris glanced at the heart monitor yet again as his eyes seemed to gain focus again. He cautiously reached forward and pulled the hospital gown into its right place, firmly over her delicate shoulders. Asking for permission with his eyes he reached behind and tied it back up and slowly backed away.

“Do you want to rest?” He asked her.

She nodded and to her surprise he simply pushed her over as he laid besides her. She stared up at the ceiling as his warm breath tickled her right cheek. She glanced down at her feet and a chuckle escaped her as she saw how his feet stuck out past the edge of the bed.

“Was there no chance in saving Sehun?” She whispered and felt him tense up besides her.

“Let’s not talk about that” He said firmly, throwing an arm around her and brining her into his chest, “Try to sleep” He suggested.

Even though she was worried sick, even though she felt inexplicably guilty for what had happen to Sehun, and she was just lying next to the person she loved, she fell asleep.

It was exactly 53 minutes later, Kris had counted, that Jong In came in. He stared at him with a somber look in his eyes as he glanced at Min Ah sleeping unaware.

“Are you sure?” He asked Kris, recalling the instructions he had given him before he had come in.

“Yes. I trust you won’t do anything to interfere” Kris said subconsciously tightening his hold on Min Ah.

“I won’t” Jong In promised as he watched Kris reach for a set of keys in his pocket and throw them to him.

“Work fast. We’ve got only tonight”

“I’ve already called for help. We’ll be out of there in long before dawn. She’s gonna hate you though”

“I’d rather her hate me then having to lose her like we did Sehun”

“I agree” Jong In said hesitating only slightly before stepping out quietly.

Kris looked back down at the girl in his arms and went back to just holding her. He felt so much at once that nothing came out. Like a machine he held her in his arms as dozens of emotions clamored for attention in him, none of them making the final cut.

They were suffocating him.

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Thanks for reading! :)