Soyeon's Pov

I glared at her back side. If I could I would burn a hole through it, a hole through her back and heart.  She's making all the wrong moves. 

Where was my prince when I had my problems? Why didn't I have someone like Kai? Kris is one of the best things that has happened to me. But, I swear if she wasn't mental then he would pick her over me. There's just something that tells me he would. 

Yunhee's so blind. Kai's such a caring and loving person. All she does is push him away. Don't make the mistake I did, idiot. Don't push people away. I'm lucky to have Kris as it is. Living a fake life is worse then living the life you live. 

I swiftly entered the classroom before the bell ring. Eyes quickly scanning the room before I found Yunhee, in the same corner as always. What a pitiful life, that highly resembled my past one. For the last two years, Park Yunhee, I made your life living hell, I made your life exactly how mine was four years ago. You make the same mistakes I did. Everyone would, everyone's so pitiful and idiotic; all following my footsteps. But, look at where I am now, I smirked still staring at Yunhee. What a pathetic loser. However, does that make me a sinner to lead her  life the same way I lead mine? 

No Pov

Kai dragged his feet to the lunch room. The aroma of food filled his lungs. Precious food, calories, and vitamins that Yunhee was neglecting. Kai thought to himself, he angrily ruffled his arrayed brown hair. She wouldn't leave his mind for a second. The guilt and concerned was murdering him. Yunhee could literally die, drop dead, anytime. For all he knew she only ate a few saltine crackers a day for her meal. How could her parents be so blind to ignore that their daughter is on the edge of death? How could they not see that she was slowly fading and dying away. 

Kai's Pov

I have to talk to her. We were doing so well. How could something so simple as leaving sticky notes in her room evoke her to not even talk to me anymore?!  I have ten days. Ten days until winter break. 

I literally shuddered at the thought of her being home alone in her mental state. What could ten days do? What could those damn days do anyways?!

I plopped down angrily next to Kris. Kris peered up at me. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," I growled. Kris raised his eyebrows and his lips formed a curious smirk. I just shook it off. We may speak later, at home. 

Nothing is wrong with ME. Everything is wrong with HER. Why do I always get myself into ? If she hurts herself I'll be the one to blame when I didn't go anything to begin with. 

The first time I saw her she just looked so vulnerable and weak. Sitting there like a mute, in her pain skin, scratching away her wrists. It took a pang at me. As freaky as it was, it hurt him. I've always said I don't know why I care that much but I know, it's just hiding down there real deep... And I'm not pulling that dreadful memory anytime soon. 

Yunhee's Pov

Stupid, stupid, stupid. Pathetic, pathetic, pathetic. Infinite amounts of insults were clouded in my mind, a haze of weariness even formed from all of the harsh words. If I were to choose a color to describe me then I would choose grey. Bleak, boring, and ugly. I'm not even worthy of the color black. Black means mystery, black means darkness, black means something. Where as I mean nothing. Absolutely nothing, not close enough to be described as the color black, not close enough to be defined by the color white. I was dead center, grey. A boring, dreaded color. Grey was nothing, only used in the newspaper no one read anymore. It does show well on white and not too well either on black. It's basically useless. I sighed internally. I supposed it could be considering as a good fashion color to wear, perhaps as a scarf or as pants, maybe even a cardigan. What does that matter though? The color that describes me looks good on clothes that make me feel hideous. Clothes that show that I weigh a ton. Too make it better, elephants. Wrinkly, large, and fat elephants, those things are grey and only grey. It's just the perfect color to describe my bleak life.

I sat looking at my tasteless crackers. They probably have a better life than I do, I mused. I let out a heavy sigh, earning a death glare from Soyeon. Snapping my mouth shut I just sat and pondered some more. 

I can't love. Who will even think of login such a broken and ugly character like me? I can't enjoy. The fun of life has been out of mine. If only pounds would go with it. I can't provide a future. What more can I give to the earth? More bones and ashes, that's for sure. I don't have anything set out for me. Life was so empty and useless.

I don't even possess friendship. I peered around at the table. Everyone was just so fake and made up of lies, people who I just can't push myself to really open up to. My eyes landed on Kai, he was the closest thing I had as a friend, and I pushed him away. I grimaced, I definitely am a pitiful soul.

Then and there I just wanted to fall, fall into a deep pit and disappear. I felt tears well up in my eyes. What's wrong with me today?! Especially today! I'm being such an over emotion wimp, my head was turning in a wave of emotion. It ached and everything in the world seemed blurry. The whole world didn't even seem to exist, it was just a vast land of nothing for me. Nothing for a fat, ugly, and selfish person like me.

The bell rung, increasing my headache. I got up and lost my footing, I prepared for a thud but surprisingly nothing happened. Jongin eyes pierced their way into mine. "You ok?"

I nodded, awkwardly trying to work my way out of his arms that were wrapped around my large waist. "Hey Jongin..." I started, I have no clue where this next phrase come from but I just had to ask. "You still promise right?"

Kai stopped, as hesitated. I could just see the betrayal and worry in his eyes. I expected him to say no, however, he just nodded slightly and walked ahead. 

Tears threatened to spill over. "Thank you, Kai," I whispered out to the now empty lunch room.

Kai's Pov

I walked to fourth. Replaying what had just happened, again and again. The emotions that welled up, hearing those words. Her voice, so shaken and frightened, asking me to keep the promise. How could I ever say no. 

I'm so pathetic. How did I get myself into such a terrible mess? Our so called friendship has been like a roller coaster; traveling up and down, there were happy times and then times that didn't make sense. Times where Yunhee would just go crazy and throw me into the dark, leading her own life. Even if she cruelly threw me into the dark; when I heard her utter the phrase with all the context to the words, I wanted to wrap her into my arms for no reason, to just wrap her tightly and keep her there, keep her safe. She was probably the closest friend I've ever made, and it's just so heart wrenching to watch her rip me away. 

Please stop, Yunhee. Let me be there for you. Let me be your shoulder to lean on. Let me be the brightness in your life. Stop pushing me away! I screamed in my mind as if she could hear me. 

Pathetic. She can't hear you, Kai. Stop being a loser and talking to her as if she can hear, as if she will listen, as if she cares. 

When have I become so soft though? I was the one with my walls up and myself secured! How could a girl who looks as if she could break in half anytime now break down my safe and secure cold, stone walls? 

I sighed out loud. Picking up my pencil to write down the lesson. Suddenly I don't even feel like learning anymore. I don't feel like doing anything by swim in my own thoughts of despair. Wondering what's the reason for all of my doings... What's the reason for Yunhee's doing? Nothing ever will be clear, I suppose.