[Warning: This chapter is rated NC-17 for Language.]

"Explain something to me." probed Changmin

"What is it now?" replied Manager Kim.

"Have you noticed anything strange going on with Yunho lately?" Changmin asked.

"No, why? Is there something going on I should know about?" Manager Kim answered with concern.

"Probably not." replied Changmin.

Over the last two weeks, Changmin had noticed a change in Yunho that caused him great alarm. Ever since the incident four years ago, Yunho had taken it upon himself, not to be outwardly kind to anyone, except his closest friends. His disposition over the years had earned him the nickname "Yuki Yunho" taken from the Japanese word for snow. Press, executives, and even fans began to err on the side of caution when approaching Yunho; afraid that even the slightest misstep or misunderstood word, would lead Yunho into a fit of rage. He was cold, distant, and down right rude to everyone. Changmin never could understand why his beloved Hyung was being this way. He only knew that Yunho was really angry at someone and was taking it out on the world. No matter how many times he asked Yunho about his behavior, he never got an answer. Yunho would just brush off Changmin's questioning and change the subject.

However, ever since Yunho's reoccuring dream had come back to him once more, it had been as if a switch had been flipped in his personality. He went from being cold and distance to warm and fuzzy in a matter of days. Now, normally, Changmin would have felt happy about this drastic change for the better but he knew something was seriously wrong. This was totally unlike the Hyung he had known for the last four years, and to see him return back to his old self Changmin began to fear that Yunho was having a nervous breakdown.

Today even proved his point further, as he stood and stared as Yunho playfully interacted with all the staff at todays photoshoot. He was laughing and carry on with all the girls, joking with the head photographer, and making silly faces moments before the photographer's shutter clicked causing an uproar of laughter among the staff. 

"Yah! Yunho knock it off!" laughed the photographer "Be serious!"

"But, I'm not in the mood to be serious right now." giggled Yunho in an overly cute voice "I want to have fun."

"Yunho, Just knock it off already. We still have more on the schedule today." ordered Manager Kim "Lets get this done."

"Ugh, Alright." Yunho agreed with a disappointed sigh.

They were working on the new photograph spread for their upcoming album's new photo book. The new album was sure to be a hit as for some strange reason the new music was very reminiscent of their early days in the business. Yunho had decided to do a remake their original debut song and revamp it to fit just his and Changmin's vocals. Their song Hug had been one of the fans most beloved songs from their early days, and with Yunho's decision to re-do it in the duo's own style, everyone thought that Yunho had finally laid the past to rest. That song not only had a very special meaning to Changmin and Yunho, but to the three brothers they left behind. For five years after their debut, the company had wanted the group to do a remix of the song , but Yunho refused every time saying "That song is special to all of us, we will never remake it." So, when Yunho brought up the idea a week ago, all the staff and even Changmin were shocked.

"Why would Hyung want to remake it now? Does he hate them that much?" thought Changmin as he watched the make-up artist touching up Yunho's face. "What would possess him to do this now?"

Changmin knew that he was going to have to talk to his Hyung about it, but he just couldn't find the right time to bring it up. Their comeback date was getting closer and closer, and he was running out of time. He had to know what was really going on in Yunho's head right now. As all these questions swirled around in Changmin's mind he heard a voice calling his name. 

"Minnie?" said Yunho as he laid his hand on Changmin's shoulder.

"Oh, Hyung. What is it?" stammered Changmin.

"Are you alright?" asked Yunho "You're staring off into space."

"Oh, I'm alright." replied Changmin.

"I've finished my set." continued Yunho "Are you hungry? Want to grab some food on the way to the studio?"

"Food? ABSOLUTELY!" squealed Changmin with a childish smile on his face.

Changmin quickly grabbed his gear and headed towards the exit. He and Yunho quickly jumped in the awaiting black suburban just parked outside and off they went. Changmin really loved to ride in the car because it gave him time to think about anything he wanted with out someone shouting his name, boasting orders, or asking mundane questions. After many years together, Yunho and Changmin had created an unspoken tradition of relishing the quiet of every car ride, since peace and quiet had become something of a luxury to them. As Changmin began stare off into space once more, a scene flashed across his mind. 

[Flashback: December 2009]

"Minnie?" asked Yunho as he knocked on the bedroom door "We have to get ready to leave. Are your alright?" 

"Come out of there right now!" ordered Yunho, but there was no answer.

Yunho tried to turn the doorknob only to find it locked.

"MINNIE??" Yunho asked in a panicked voice as he beat his fist on the door "Please open the door! You're scaring me!"

"GO AWAY!" cried out Changmin throught the endless flow of tears streaming down his face "Go away and never come back!"

"Minnie stop crying and tell me whats wrong!" pleaded Yunho "Please!"

Suddenly the bedroom door flew open and Yunho stood face to face to an extremely upset Changmin. His eyes were red and puffy, his hair was disheveled, and he looked completely furious. Changmin stood there glaring at Yunho for a few moments before he finally spoke.

"WHAT'S WRONG?" yelled Changmin in Yunho's face "You have got to be ing kidding me!"

"Woah!" said a surprised Yunho "What's with the cussing all of a sudden? You never curse."

"Don't change the damn subject!" continued Changmin "You dare to stand there and ask me to tell you what's wrong?"

"You lied to them and to me!" growled Changmin.

"What the hell are you talking about?" asked a panicked Yunho.

"You know good and damn well what I'm talking about!" declared Changmin "Or have you lied to me more than once??"

"Lied..to them?" Yunho questioned "What's going on?"

"I .. got a call last night from Kim Hyun Joong." stammered Changmin "He told me some things..."

"What things?" asked Yunho "What did he say?"

"That's not the point right now!" declared Changmin "I talked to Manager Kim, he said that you never told Jae why we backed out. You never told him! WHY?"

"There were reasons Minnie." sighed Yunho. 

"I knew something had went wrong, when you told me we weren't going to go through with the lawsuit." continued Changmin "But I never thought that Jae didn't know why!"

"Why won't you tell me the truth about what happened?" pleadead Changmin "You destroyed our family, FOR WHAT!  We're all suffering because of you!"

"Suffering?" scoffed Yunho. "They seem to be doing just fine."

"OH PLEASE HYUNG!" yelled a frustrated Changmin as he grabbed his head and shook it in disbelief "You have no idea whats going on with them, because you haven't even bothered to check!"

"You have ignored everyone that has brought our brothers up in conversation." scoffed Changmin "You don't even care that .. "

"What are you saying?" asked Yunho "You know something don't you?"

"I've.... heard .. things." stammered Changmin

"Heard what? From who?" Yunho questioned as he put his hands on Changmin's shoulders and shook him lightly "Tell me what you know?"

"WHY SHOULD I?" screamed Changmin "Why should I tell you anything? You won't even be honest with me!"

"We're in this together, till the end Hyung." stated Changmin "How can I do anything if you keep me in the dark?"

"I promise I will tell you everything when I can." promised Yunho "Now, Please tell me whats going on with them!"

"Not them, him." mumbled Changmin

"Him?" asked a worried Yunho "It's Jae isn't it? Tell me right now!"

"Jae.. he..." stuttered Changmin "He's a mess. Like off the deep end kind of mess."

"What are you trying to say Minnie?" pushed Yunho frantically "What's wrong with Jae?"

"He's.... lost.. himself." whispered Changmin softly.

"Lost?" asked a perplexed Yunho "But everyone keeps saying that he is fine."

"Even though you haven't been asking, the company and staff have been lying about it anyway." answered Changmin "Everyone knows what's going on but their keeping it from us."

"Lying? Why would they...?" whispered Yunho softly.

"I should have told Hyung everything that night" thought Changmin as he continue to stare out the window. But how could he? He knew how much Jaejoong meant to Yunho. How could he tell him everything? It was bad enough that Jaejoong was a complete emotional disaster at the time, what if Yunho became the same way? So, Changmin chose to lie. He had told Yunho that Jaejoong had a nervous breakdown due to stress over the lawsuit and trying to get back into music as a trio. He played off the whole incident between him and Yunho that night as a mild panic attack of guilt for leaving them behind and Yunho had believed him. 

"Hyung?" asked Changmin softly

"Yeah?" Yunho answered as he peaked out of one eye.

"Can I ask you something?" continued Changmin "If you found out that someone you trusted kept something major from you, trying to protect you, would you be angry or understanding?"

"What brought this on?" asked Yunho "Did someone do something to my Minnie?"

"It's not that." stated Changmin "I just wanted to know."

"Well, I guess that would depend on how big it was." answered Yunho "If it was someone I truly trusted, I'm sure I would be hurt at first but after a while I know I would forgive them."

"I see." mumbled Changmin

"Is there something you need to tell me?" probed Yunho

"Well..." started Changmin "I've been thinking alot about that big fight we had that one Christmas."

"That?" questioned Yunho "Why are you even thinking about that now, it was so long ago."

"It's just..." started Changmin before he trailed off.

"It's just what?" retorted Yunho and he turned to look eye-to-eye with Changmin.

"I ..think I should tell you something....something, I kept from you." stuttered Changmin "It's about Jae."

"Ok?" stammered Yunho with a puzzled look.

"He didn't have a nervous breakdown because of the lawsuit..." continued Changmin "He had a full meltdown."

"What do you mean?" questioned Yunho with a worried look.

"He..." said Changmin as tears began to run down his face 

"It's alright Minnie. You can tell me." said Yunho softly as he laid his hand on Changmin's shoulder to reassure him.

"He nearly ... drank himself to death." blurted out Changmin before he bursted into uncontrollable sobbing.

"What are you saying??" panicked Yunho as he shook Changmin harshly "What do you mean by that?"

Changmin, sobbing violently, buried his face in Yunho's chest and said "You broke his heart, Hyung. He... lost all sense of himself..."

"What?" Yunho softly with a shocked tone.

"None of us knew why." stated Changmin "What I did find out, was just bits and pieces."

"What happened?" panicked Yunho.

"We don't really know. Jae .. he .. just ..." cried Changmin "He almost left us for good."

"LEFT?"  yelled Yunho "Do you mean...?"

"Yeah." whispered Changmin in disbelief. 

"Why didn't you tell me when it was happening?" Yunho asked harshly  "I could have done some..."

"Nothing." cried Changmin "Even if you knew, we still wouldn't have been able to help."

"That's why I kept it from you." sniffled Changmin. "That's why we all hid it from you."

"We?" asked Yunho "We, who?"

"...the family" whispered Changmin softly.

"You mean you... and Chunnie and Su?" asked Yunho perplexed.

"We had to." sniffled Changmin "Su and Chunnie practically begged me not to say anything."

"How did you even talk to them?" stammered Yunho. "Why did they ask that of you?."

"To protect you.. was the only answer I got." mumbled Changmin. "I guess they didn't want you to fall apart too." 

"Protect me from what?" thought Yunho.

"That's something you will need to ask them." Changmin stated.

"FINE! I will." declared Yunho.