A week’s passed. I’ve been feeling heavier as each day passes by and I don’t even know why. I often look through the mirror and see an ugly kind of me and that’s so not bearable to see, you see? I always feel, taste and smell weird about every food I eat, but then I’m glad that I haven’t started on the stage where in I’d have to crave non stop. Chun didn’t really acknowledge me to go work on my first month, but then I insisted on doing so. Oh yeah, I vomit everyday and it and smells like hell. We do that even before he drops us to the company.

We – Chun and I were real happy hearing that we’d soon have a baby! The minute I entered his office, I asked him to do a favor for me…

“Chun.” I called out as I kissed him on his cheek. “Can you give me a letter, t’morrow?” I asked him.

“Why?” He asked me and crossed his arms.

“It’s supposed to be well-written, okay?” I asked again without even taking note about his question. “Remember, I’m a former writer that didn’t publish her stories.” I warned.

“Okay.” He sighed. “I might as well write out my proposal to you.” I swear, I just heard something that my ears barely heard for he said it in a whisper, but nonetheless I hope that he’s not trying to make up something that would make me faint. I laughed and returned back to my office… waiting for the day to end.

After that, we didn’t do anything in specific that day. He was too busy so and I was feeling heavy.

--

I stared out the window and looked around for my husband before going out of the house. I knew it was time – finally time for my DEATH. Death - something that seems so hard to put up as a topic.

Yesterday, I heard him talking to his agents. I learned from him that they’ve found out the one and only person he’s been finding way to give revenge, which was me and as soon as he heard that, he asked his agents to kill that person in an instant.

There appeared a cloud I was seeing through.

--A flashback:

“Sir, we’ve found out who the suspect is.” A voice conversed with my husband in loudspeaker, coming from the phone. “It’s a woman.”

My reaction was priceless. I, without further hesitations knew that it was me. Something told me to back out from where I was standing and hide away from him. In a far away place that he wouldn’t see me, perhaps. But then something told me that I must just continue how I lived my everyday life and let whatever will soon happen just happen – whatever that may be.

“Kill her in an instant.” My husband replied. Not wanting to hear further explanation and hesitation, he hung up the phone.

I didn’t try to confront him and tell him the truth that it was me – the reason why his parents died, it was me. All the while, I knew about his true and utterly shocking main goal in life that was to kill me, but I didn’t try and do anything about it. I loved my husband too much to even tell him that for all the while, it was me as his wife who killed his parents a few years back.

“Oh, you’re there.” My husband turned around and saw me. “You must have heard it, right?” I nodded and went towards him.

“Is there something wrong?” He asked his not so cheerful wife that is me.

In response, I shook my head and tried to suppress a smile to assure him that everything was going just fine with my current state in life.

“How’s Camille?” He asked me, while he sat me on his lap. I smiled.

“She’s fine and she really looks like you.” I said, while he rose up an eyebrow. “Every time I look at her, it reminds me of you.” I caressed his cheeks. “Dear--“
“Hm?” He murmured, waiting for a response.

“Kiss me.” I replied. Thus, we kissed.

--End of flashback.

And then it disappeared.

That last moment, that last kiss... that might be the last kiss we'll ever share. Nothing’s going to stop me now, I thought as I carefully went out of our house. After reminiscing memories, something’s supposed to be given in return – my LIFE. With that, I carefully went out of the house afraid to wake up my husband and child and then all of a sudden, out of no where—it was just a dream!

I got up from bed and looked around me only to find my bedside empty. He didn’t sleep with me today, I thought and took in a deep breath as I tried to calm myself from that nightmare I just had.

God, what did that dream mean?

I asked myself.

Are there chances that it would happen to me?

I asked myself again and carefully jumped off from my bed.

Who was Camille?

Those questions, those same questions kept running through my mind as I went to my bathroom and ‘vomit’ed yet again. This is the second time for the day, is it possible? I asked myself and for once, Chun wasn’t there beside me to massage my back and help me with the pain I was going through now. Oh, I remember! There was a voice that was narrating to me in my dream… I really wonder why I’ve been having strange dreams for these past few days.

Is it an effect when you’re pregnant?

As soon as I stepped out of my bathroom, I looked to my windows only to find the sun brightly shining through my room. Then I looked at the clock, which read five in the morning. Oh, so this isn’t the second time for the day that I’m vomiting. I remember now that Chun dropped me off in my house! Hm, sad to say but yeah… we aren’t living in one roof yet, but then I’m sure we would once he proposes for a wedding, I daydreamed and all of a sudden, I forgot about the dream that haunted me.

--

“Here’s your letter!” He surprised me once I got inside his office.

“Is it well written?” I asked and furrowed my eyebrows at him.

“Of course!” He exclaimed and happily got back to his seat just right after he kissed me on my cheek.

“Then, I’ll start reading it now.” I happily said and quickly sat my on his comfy and soft sofa chair.

The letter read:

‘To my dearest mushroom;’

What!? What mushroom? I’m not a fungus, I laughed and glanced at him for a bit and he practically looked like he knew what I was reading right now.

‘I have so much in my mind to tell you and I’m warning you now that I don’t care whether you tell me or not that this should be well written! For I, myself is not good in grammar writing! So, I’m starting of with the reason why I love you so. Since you didn’t tell me what this letter is all about.'

Oh, I forgot to tell him what the letter should be about.

‘I love so much about you that it is hard to pick just a couple of things out to be able to tell you in this piece of paper. I love the way you laugh. I love the way you smile. I even love it when you make me mad and don't know why. I love how you upset me and try so hard to make it better. I am so in love with you that I don't go one minute without thinking of you and wishing that I was with you! I can't stand to be without you for one second. You have truly turned me into myself. Before you, nobody allowed me to be me. You have allowed me to open up my heart and trust again. You have allowed me to smile and be happy again and for that, I love you. I thank you and I will forever cherish our memories may it be from the past, the present or in the near future.’

‘With all the love, hugs and kisses from your ever handsome and gentle boyfriend and soon-to-be husband,

Chun’

‘PS: It was so sudden that you asked me for a letter and I didn’t even know what to write, but then I thought of you and got the inspiration. So you see…, honestly, I went through a lot of drafts and this is what I finish off with. But before I end my post-script…, I’d like you to see the second paper that’s still inside the envelope and answer me whenever you can.’

Honestly, as I was reading through his letter, I felt the sweetness and love he has for me. Even though that for some people it might be cheesy, I still love it. One – because it’s him, it’s my love who made it and second… because I love him and whatever he makes for me, I’ll appreciate endlessly. With that post-script I read from his, I took out a hard paper from inside the envelope he gave me that read ‘WILL YOU MARRY ME?’ It’s up to you how you imagine it to look like, but all I could say is that it’s so awesome. Oh my, just lately was it that I was hoping for a proposal and now here it is, right in front of my eyes. After reading his letter and that proposal for me, I cried! I cried not because his proposal was just on a piece of hard paper, but then I cried because I know now that he loves me so much. Anyway, it didn’t matter to me now whether it was on a piece of hard paper. After all, he designed it beautifully and creatively just for me and I can clearly see all his efforts on it.

I looked up at him and carefully brought back the pieces of paper back into its envelope. I see that he noticed me crying as he made his way to sit beside me. I looked at him with my eyes all puffy as he carefully thumbed all of my tears away.

“Why are you crying?” He asked me. I completely ignored him for a couple of seconds as I looked into his eyes and after a minute or so, the gap between his lips and mine closed in a kiss. In short, it was like my answer to his question. The question he asked me on his letter… ‘WILL YOU MARRY ME?’