« This is delicious, Mr. Kang » Joohyun thanked the man in front of her as she continued diving into her spaghettis. The dinner had been going well. Seulgi’s parents were very kind to her and made the conversation easy. They didn’t ask her much questions either and Joohyun wondered if Seulgi had talked to them while she had been in the restroom. 

« Thank you, Joohyun. I’m glad you like them » He smiled warmly at her, taking a mouthful of his own creation. 

« Dad’s a chef at a hotel » Seulgi informed her « He rarely cooks at home but I guess because you are here they wanted to make an impress » She obviously joked.

« Yah! Kang Seulgi! » Her mother groaned « Why do you make us look bad? » Joohyun chuckled and Mr. Kang shook his head with a smile. 

« She kind of got us there, Honey » He said to his wife who had to admit the truth with a nod and a sigh. 

« Don’t worry, you don’t look bad in my eyes at all » Joohyun reassured them as Seulgi smiled teasingly at her parents. 

« Thank you for that, Dear. You can come by anytime you want then » Mrs. Kang joked, making them laugh. 

« Oh, by the way » Her husband looked at his daughter « I can’t drive you to school tomorrow, I have to get to the hotel early » 

« It’s okay, dad. Don’t worry » Seulgi waved off, knowing how hard he was working.

« But you can take my car » Her mother interjected « I want to walk to the office tomorrow. The walk today made me realize I need some fresh air » 

« Okay, thanks » Seulgi said before turning toward Joohyun « Mom works at a pharmaceutical company » 

« I’m doing administration work, Seulgi » Mrs. Kang chuckled « You always make it seem like I work in a lab » Seulgi shrugged and it made them all laugh. Joohyun looked around the table with a genuine smile. She wished the atmosphere at her house would be the same. 

_

After the wonderful dinner, Seulgi led Joohyun back to her room « Do you want to take a shower first, or should I? » She asked her once they reached it. 

« Go ahead, I need to digest a bit » Joohyun rubbed her full content stomach. 

« Okay. I’ll prepare a towel and some pajamas for you » Seulgi said before she made her way inside the bathroom. Joohyun nodded and found herself alone when the door closed. She let out a deep sigh, looking around a bit lost. She didn’t really know what she should do now that she was alone. She went to her bag that was on the armchair and took out her phone, the missed calls from her sister and brother appeared first but she deleted everything with a sudden knot in her stomach at the prospect of their upcoming confrontation the next day. She sighed and sat on Seulgi’s bed, beginning to shop for painting supplies online. By the time Seulgi got out, she was torn between two types of easels but forgot rather quickly when she set eyes on the other girl. With no make-up on and her baggy combo of grey sweatpants and a long sleeves white shirt, Seulgi was, as always, stunning. Joohyun gulped heavily but thankfully Seulgi didn’t catch it. 

« You can go in, I put everything you need on the vanity » 

« Thanks » Joohyun put her phone on the nightstand before taking her necessities in her bag and rushing inside the bathroom. While she was inside she had the time to compose herself and when she got out, Seulgi was sitting on her bed, reading a book. She lifted her eyes toward her and when they met hers, Joohyun, for the first time in her life, felt like it was the most real moment she had lived. Why now? She didn’t know. It’s just that….She felt that Seulgi was real and that she was too. It was simple, random, and yet….overwhelming. She didn’t know if Seulgi felt it too, she couldn’t tell. Seulgi simply closed her book and got up. 

« I thought that you might need some clothes for tomorrow since you still have the same bag from the sleepover and you might not have taken others at home, so I got some » She pointed at the armchair. Joohyun diverted her gaze toward it and analyzed what was there: jeans, a t-shirt, and a sweater. She took the sweater and discreetly approach it from her nose. She was very thankful but she couldn’t help but be disappointed. She didn’t want to seem impolite but she couldn’t help herself but ask. 

« Seul,….could you…lend me a…hoodie instead? » She nervously managed to let out, too shy to meet her eyes. 

Seulgi stared at her and she saw that there was a seemingly obvious reason behind her request. She immediately remembered how Joohyun had worn her other hoodie at school, and how she had treated it.

« I noticed that you seemed to like that hoodie I gave you after the storm » She said in a soft tone while approaching her « You played with the sleeves and smelled it often » She replayed it in her head. At the time, it had greatly intrigued her and she still couldn’t really understand what it meant for Joohyun, but maybe she could figure it out now. She opened her wardrobe and took a black hoodie out before handing it to Joohyun « Here, it’s clean » She frowned when she saw that Joohyun almost seemed disappointed to hear that. Nonetheless, under her gaze, Joohyun brought it close to her nose and a faint smile graced her lips. 

« Thanks » Joohyun whispered and set it carefully on top of the pile of clothes that she would wear the next day. 

Seulgi went back to sit on her bed, not leaving her out of her sight « Can you tell me why you want one? It’s okay if you don’t want to answer, it’s just that I’m really curious » She questioned, hoping that it wouldn’t make Joohyun close off. The other girl cleared and joined her on her bed. They sat next to one another in silence until Joohyun finally found the courage to tell her the reason. 

« Because there’s your smell on it » She mumbled nervously and Seulgi’s eyebrows slightly rose with surprise « And it calms me. It makes me feel safe. It’s filled with your warmth » Joohyun began tearing up as she explained « It’s like your holding me and….I feel peace…for the first time in a long time. Your smell is disappearing on your other hoodie and…I….I don’t want to let go of that » Silence invaded the room. She was too scared to look at Seulgi for a bit but she gathered the courage as her heart bounced in her chest. She met a blank expression that terrified her « Please, Seul, say something » She begged with a shaking voice. Seulgi took a deep breath before she slide under the cover and lay down. Joohyun was confused but imitated her. She waited, staring at the ceiling, absolutely terrified that she went too far this time, that the only person that gave her comfort will disappear. She fell in love and she’ll have her heart break at the same time. was tight and burning while tears threatened to spill out of her eyes. She clenched her fist in fear of what was going to happen next. She could already picture herself sitting on the curb sobbing under the moonlight that would witness her breakdown. 

Seulgi her side, toward her, and her heart skipped a beat. She gulped and slowly turned her head toward her. However, all her worries got erased the moment her eyes set on hers. There it was again, that comfort, that safety that she couldn’t explain. So once again she imitated her. On their sides, eyes in one another, they stayed in silence. The world disappeared and so did the concept of time. Joohyun couldn’t say how long it was. She lost track of time and entered that mental garden again. It was so warm and freeing that she wished to stay this way until she’ll fade away of old age. 

Seulgi raised her hand slowly and her fingertips grazed upon her cheek as if she was scared to break her, but Joohyun craved this touch. She almost leaned forward for it. But she kept still, too afraid to break their moment. 

« I think I’m becoming selfish » Seulgi whispered as her fingers settled gently against her cheek. 

« I don’t know what you are thinking about but I can tell you you’re the most selfless person I ever met » Joohyun murmured. 

« I really want to help you but… » Seulgi inhaled and exhaled deeply « Hearing about why you want that hoodie makes me think about….about something more than helping you » She let out and Joohyun could distinguish the shame in her eyes. She shook her head and put her hand over Seulgi’s, allowing her to feel more of it on her face. She closed her eyes for a few seconds to completely memorize the sensation. 

« You promised you won’t get hurt, Seul. So for once, let yourself be free around me because you’re the only person I can truly be myself around and explore the things I want to do. Be yourself Seul. Do what you want to do. You helped me…more than anyone could have in years or decades. I can finally face myself in the mirror, Seul » She didn’t detach her eyes from hers « We both know there’s something bigger between us besides you helping me so…. » She took her hand off Seulgi’s and delicately reached for her face. This time it was her fingers who were too shy to touch her but Seulgi closed her eyes and she knew she could reach her fully. She caressed her cheek and whispered « Don’t hide, Seulgi….Not from me…..Never, please » Seulgi opened back her eyes and they locked eyes. There was a hint of fear in Seulgi’s eyes that Joohyun desperately wanted to erase.

And then…

Seulgi slowly leaned over. It happened in slow motion or too fast, Joohyun couldn’t really remember the motion of time in that instant. It was just like when they kissed during the peak of the storm at the end of that very bed. Only this time, Joohyun wasn’t terrified when Seulgi’s lips met her own. It tasted sweet and safe….almost like….home. Seulgi withdrew herself, meeting her eyes once again but Joohyun didn’t want that anymore. She closed the gap that Seulgi had created and kissed her with all the passion that burned inside her body since she last did it. Seulgi responded to the kiss but it didn’t turn into lust or arousal. It was warm, caring, and tender. It was what Joohyun imagined love felt like. 

They pulled away delicately and they smiled at one another, keeping silent to comprehend what had happened. Was it so hard to realize? Maybe for them, because they cared so much, because they wanted to protect the other, because they didn’t want to lose each other if they took a wrong step. 

« What is going on with us? » Seulgi asked what she already knew. She tucked the strand of hair that had fallen over Joohyun’s face, her fingers lingering on her jawline which made Joohyun shiver. 

« I’m asking myself the same question » She whispered with a small smile « But it feels…natural » Seulgi gave her a nod. 

« It does » She took a deep breath. They heard noise in the hallway that brought them back to reality. Seulgi looked at Joohyun and cleared « Maybe we…should get some sleep » Joohyun nodded but neither of them moved, instead she took Seulgi’s hand and intertwined their fingers, putting them in the middle of them. Seulgi smiled and closed the lights. They could barely see each other and both thought the other had fallen asleep but how could they after what happened. 

« You still owe me two » Joohyun mumbled to herself as she fell asleep. It was barely audible for Seulgi but it managed to make her heart race. Joohyun was referring to the surprise kisses that she had challenged her to get even. Seulgi chuckled mentally, rubbing her thumb against Joohyun’s hand. She didn’t imagine she would have given her one. She was the kind to ask consent first. But…

She sighed contently and closed her eyes, her lips tingling as she remembered the feeling of Joohyun’s lips against hers.

__________________________________________

Hey, guys! Hope you enjoyed this chapter?

See you next week :)

-J