“Does she really have to be a man for you to love her, Yongsun?” Irene asked beside me.

Chorong, Irene and I were exiting the building after finishing work. I’ve told them about how I’d always wake up to Wheein shouting at me. I’ve also told them how sometimes my last dream before I wake up was of Wheein standing inside the elevator and looking at me while the elevator doors were closing until it completely blocked my view of her. Simply, my dreams every night would be of Wheein, which would remind me of how much I miss her.

“Why are you asking me that? I still love Eric” I whispered to her.

“Do you still really love him?” Chorong asked on my other side.

I closed my eyes to sigh heavily, tired from work and tired from answering their questions. “I’ve told you a million times that I do,” I said exasperatedly.

Honestly, the more they ask me about this, the more I doubt myself of this answer. Even Eric asks me about this sometimes. I don’t know why they doubt me. I don’t know why Eric doubts me too. He should be happy that I still love him after he cheated on me once. He should be happy that I still accepted him with open arms.

“Does he still ask if you texted Wheein?” Irene asked as we exited the elevator.

“Yeah… Why?”

“Did he tell you to stop?”

“One time…” My eyebrows furrowed as I recalled if he still told me to stop contacting Wheein. “I think there was also another time he told me not to but I couldn’t remember. Why?”

“He’s jealous” Chorong whispered while Irene nodded her head in agreement.

“Why would he be jealous of Wheein? Wheein is just a friend and you all know, he knows I am not attracted to women. Why would you say that?” I mumbled, slightly pouting at them.

“It’s been almost two months and you haven’t heard or seen Wheein, but here you are, still searching and wanting to talk to her. You tell Wheein more of your son’s progress, which is by the way, Eric’s son also, before you tell him. Why wouldn’t he be scared of that? Why wouldn’t he be jealous?” Chorong explained.

“Wheein is just a very close friend” I whispered exasperatedly.

“Yeah… Tell that to the guards” Irene jokingly whispered just as we passed the guards who just looked at us like we’re the most uninteresting human beings in this building.

I smiled and walked ahead of them when I saw Yongjae and Eric waiting for me outside the building. Eric has been spending a lot of time with Yongjae that Yongjae wouldn’t cry and whimper away from his touch anymore. However, Yongjae would still look for Wheein and would sometimes didn’t want Eric to hold him or carry him.

“Mom… my!” Yongjae mumbled before he shrieked and started wiggling out of Eric’s arms, wanting to get to me as soon as he could.

“Oh… Woah! Yongjae, careful…” Eric said to Yongjae while he held Yongjae tightly when our son started leaning forward and kicking his legs wildly.

I reached both of my arms to Yongjae and immediately lifted him off Eric’s arms while Eric grabbed my bag and carried it for me. I raised him above me, grunting from his weight already before I showered kisses all over his face while he giggled loudly. I hugged him and snuggled my nose on his neck before I inhaled his scent.

“My baby smells so good” I whispered to him while he yelped and moved away from my nose when my breath tickled him. “Mommy misses my baby so much. I miss you, Yongjae” I whispered as I showered kisses all over his face again.

I moved to Eric when he was just standing close to me, watching me and Yongjae with a huge smile on his face. We kissed before I whispered, “Thank you for picking me up”

He kissed my forehead before he whispered, “No problem”

“Eric!”

I turned around and saw Changsub coming out of the building, reaching a hand to Eric. Eric walked around me to shake Changsub’s hand and that one side hug with the pat on the back that men usually do.

Chorong and Irene approached me right away to talk to Yongjae. They pinched his cheeks, kissed him and talked to him since he’s starting making small words already. At some point, Yongjae turned to me and mumbled Whee repeatedly, looking for her again.

“Does Eric figure out that when he says this, he’s actually looking for Wheein?” Chorong whispered while I shook my head.

“Kiss” I whispered to Yongjae before I pouted my lips at him. He kissed me right away before he wrapped his tiny arms around my shoulders. I squeezed our cheeks together and whispered, “I love you”

“Wa… bu…” he responded right away, which made me instantly smile.

“My god…” Irene suddenly whispered as she pointed a finger at Yongjae and moved it up and down. “Eric only contributed his to this wonderful creation. I could only see part Yongsun and part Wheein in him”

I softly smacked her arm while Chorong laughed at her. “What are you talking about?” I muttered to Irene before I glared at Chorong. “Stop laughing”

She shook her head and laughed even more. “I can’t… It’s so funny…” she whispered between laughing.

“It’s true though” Irene said confidently while I frowned at her.

I agree with her though. I just don’t want Yongjae to listen to her blunt words and catch something from it then learn how to say it. I also don’t want Eric to hear it because I can’t deny it if he asked me about it. Maybe if Yongjae grows up, we’d see his and Eric’s resemblance.

“It’s like Eric’s just the babysitter…” Chorong whispered before Irene and her high-fived as they laughed with each other.

I playfully rolled my eyes at them but couldn’t stop the smirk on my face. I can’t help it. It’s really somewhat funny. “Okay stop it. Eric’s coming back here” I whispered to them.

They immediately composed themselves and said their goodbyes to Yongjae and me. When Eric reached us, they waved goodbye at him as well before they walked to the other side while blowing kisses to Yongjae. Yongjae copied them and blew sloppy kisses to them as well.

“Let’s go?” Eric asked as he placed an arm around my waist.

“Let’s go”

“Les… go…” Yongjae mumbled, giving me a wide smile while Eric and I both laughed at him.

“How was he?” I asked Eric as we walked back to the parking lot where he parked his car.

“He’s energetic and very playful too. I bought him these box cars because he looked like he likes cars…”

“You bought him what?” I asked, my eyebrows slightly furrowing at him.

“Box cars. You know… the action figure version of cars”

“I knew what box cars are, Eric. I’m asking you why you bought him that without consulting me first”

“Why? They’re not dangerous for him” Eric argued while I shook my head disapprovingly.

“He’s still less than a year old. He likes to chew and throw things around. Especially that he’s still teething, he’ll be shoving things into his mouth. It would’ve been better if you bought him something rubber or those soft toys so he wouldn’t hurt himself or destroy anything inside my apartment. It would also help him while he’s still growing his teeth. It would’ve been really better if you asked me first before buying stuff for him”

“I’m sorry. I’ll tell you next time. I’m really sorry, Yongsun” he whispered while rubbing his hand on my back.

“What else did you buy for him?”

“Nothing else. That’s all”

“Okay…” I whispered before I sighed heavily, exhaustion catching up on me already.

Wheein and I used to consult each other about the things we bought for Yongjae. She obviously bought a lot for him and kept on buying stuff she’d find that’s either something cute or useful or something she thought Yongjae would like. I’d always tell her not to buy for him anymore but she’d always insist and buy it for Yongjae. It wasn’t exactly like a consultation. It was more like her trying to convince me because she wanted to buy something for Yongjae.

“Next time just tell me, Eric. If it has something to do with Yongjae, just tell me first”

“You always tell Wheein first before you even told me”

I immediately stopped walking and stared at Eric intently while he looked away and scratched the back of his head as he sighed heavily. “I’m with you, Eric. I’m literally walking with you now. I tell you everything I’m doing that concerns our son. How am I supposed to tell Wheein when I’m with you this whole time since you came back?”

“You’re still texting her” Eric said, finally facing me now.

“I’m texting her because I’m worried about her after how we left things before. I texted and called you every time something happened to Yongjae, whether it seemed small or not. You never told me that you have a problem with my concern over my friend”

“You love her already, Yongsun” he insisted while I furrowed my eyebrows and clenched my teeth.

“Who am I with right now, huh? Did I accept your apology and gave you a second chance because I love Wheen? Did I invite you to my apartment and let you be a part of Yongjae’s life if I don’t love you? Why are you questioning me when we’ve been staying together this whole time?” I whispered between clenched teeth. I closed my eyes and sighed heavily before I adjusted Yongjae in my arms. “If you don’t trust me, you can just leave me and Yongjae, Eric. It was so easy for you to do that before. I’m sure the second time’s a piece of cake already”

I started walking ahead of him and headed towards the parking lot. If he doesn’t want to stay with me because of how he’s questioning my love for him, then he could just go but he’d have to drive me and Yongjae to my apartment first.

Why is everyone questioning me? And because of this, I’m starting to doubt myself as well. I don’t like doubting myself. I like making things certain. I like people being straightforward to me rather than faking things because that would end up me questioning them or myself. I don’t like that.

“Yongsun!”

I heard Eric calling out behind me just as I reached the parking lot. I closed my eyes and sighed heavily, feeling Yongjae’s eyes on me. I glanced at my son and saw him staring at me intently. Wheein was right when she said that me and Yongjae have the same eyes. Staring at Yongjae’s eyes was like staring at mine in front of a mirror.

“Hug Mommy” I whispered to him and smiled when he followed obediently.

Yongjae was hugging me when I finally stopped walking and faced Eric who was jogging towards us. He stopped in front of me and held my waist right away before he kissed my cheek.

“I’m sorry…” he sincerely said. “I was an a..” he paused and bit his bottom lip again as he glanced at Yongjae. “That was wrong of me” he said, clearing his throat before he looked at me again. “You were right and I should’ve been thankful that you’re with me right now. That you still chose to accept me. I know I promised I’ll make it up to you but I’m not owning up to my words and I’m sorry.” He quickly kissed me and kissed Yongjae’s forward before he whispered, “Please forgive me. I won’t do it again. I promise”

“Are you bothered about my concerns for Wheein?”

He shook his head right away and said, “No. No, I was just…” He gulped hard as he bent his head low. “I was just jealous,” he whispered. “You never texted me when we parted. You never called me too. I missed you so much but you never even dropped me a text. I thought you never missed me and that you didn’t love me anymore, that’s why I was surprised when you still do”

“Eric…” I whispered as I sighed heavily.

“Ewik…” Yongjae mumbled, suddenly breaking the tension between me and his father as we softly laughed at him.

I kissed his cheek and pointed at Eric as I whispered, “That’s Daddy, baby. That’s your Daddy. You should call him Daddy”

Yongjae pointed at Eric but looked at me as he mumbled again, “Ewik”

I chuckled at him and snuggled my nose at the side of his face. “No… Yongjae”

“Let’s just stick with Ewik for now” Eric said, laughing at Yongjae as he brushed back Yongjae’s hair. “We’ll just teach him how to call me his Daddy. I was never much of a father to him before. I still have much work to do”

I kissed Yongjae’s cheek before I faced Eric again. “I missed you, of course. I prohibited myself from calling you because you’re already married. What would your then wife think? How would she feel if she found her husband texting her ex-fianceé? That won’t end up well for you two and for me as well. We both know that I still have feelings for you, but for Wheein, she’s just my friend”

“Okay… I’m so sorry. I’m not questioning you again. I’m really sorry”

“It’s okay. Stop apologizing already”

He cupped my cheek before he leaned forward and kissed me. “I love you, Yongsun”

“I love you too” I whispered before I nodded at him, glad that everything was clear between us now. “Let’s go. I’m tired already”

He placed his arm around my waist again and guided me to where his car was parked. When we reached the front of his car, we stopped walking and both turned around when someone called me.

I unconsciously tightened my hold around Yongjae when I saw Mr. Yang walking towards us. The guy had an amused smirk on his face that I wanted to wipe away but I couldn’t do anything except for smiling and bowing at him since he’s my boss. He’s not in my department but the guy is still powerful inside the company. I can’t do anything except be the underdog against him.

“Good evening, sir” I greeted him.

“Good evening. And who’s this gentleman over here? Is this the husband?” Mr. Yang said as he reached a hand towards Eric.

He didn’t even introduce himself to Wheein when I was with her! When she picked me up! Every time she picked me up! He’d just pass us and throw a disgusting look towards my direction!

“Eric Nam, sir” Eric said as he introduced himself and shook Mr. Yang’s hand. “I’m not the husband. Yet. I’m hoping I’ll be” Eric said, laughing with Mr. Yang before he turned to Yongjae and brushed his hand over his hair. “I’m this little guy’s father”

“Oh… I see. Well, good evening to you, lovely family” he said, waving his hand at us as he walked towards his car.

That’s all he did. That’s what he always does. Talk to people and judge them. See if we passed whatever standards he has in his head.

I immediately went to the backseat and opened the door before I went inside. I placed Yongjae in the car seat while Eric got in the driver seat. I fastened my seatbelt next when Yongjae was already settled in his seat.

“Is there something wrong?” Eric asked.

I glanced at him through his rearview mirror and saw him looking at me worriedly. I gave him a small smile and shook my head at him. “No. I’m just tired”

“Better get you home then” he said, starting the car right away and moving us out of the parking lot.

I sighed heavily as I leaned back on my seat and turned to face Yongjae. I held his hand and kissed it before I closed my eyes, the movement of the car swaying me to sleep.

It’s amazing how the presence of a man beside a woman with a baby in her arms could change how everyone used to look at me. Could change how the general society misplaced a label on me. I told Wheein about this before but I didn’t bring it up again because she was busy with her café, she was already worried about me, and she was taking care of Yongjae and Yongkeey. I never bothered to tell Eric because I don’t see the point in telling him. It’s gone already now that he’s here.

The murmurs didn’t stop when I already gave birth to Yongjae. It just went on. They think I’m some woman who’s living the life of a party, kissing and having a fun night with some random guy every night. I’m not. They think that I seduced men and that I got too careless, that’s why I got pregnant and there’s a non-existing father on my side. I’m not. I’m not how they think I am but I couldn’t just simply erase their judgements just because I’d tell them that I’m not.

It felt like the general public was looking at me like I did a heinous crime. Like being a single mother is wrong, especially that judgemental and disgusting Mr. Yang. He didn’t even greet Wheein when Wheein used to pick me up. He didn’t even spare a respectful glance at her. Wheein who did nothing wrong and was just waiting patiently at me in front of the building with a mint chocolate drink in her hand. Wheein who drew Yongkeey using the water coming out of the cup and failed miserably and adorably. Wheein who would still drive late at night to pick me up if I have a meeting.

Gosh… I still miss her. I miss her so much.

When we reached the apartment, Eric carried Yongjae for me since I was almost passing out from exhaustion in the backseat. I carried my bag while Eric held a sleeping Yongjae with him and the baby bag.

I briefly glanced at Wheein’s still closed door before I faced my apartment door and keyed in my password. I smiled when I heard Yongkeey barking excitedly from the other side of the door. I hurriedly opened the door so she wouldn’t wake up Yongjae.

“Shh… Calm down, Yongkeey” I whispered to her as I pushed the door open.

She jumped at me right away, making me step back. She my face while I giggled and rubbed my hands on her body.

“Hello… Did you miss me? Did you miss me, Yongkeey?” I cooed at her while she barked in response. “Shouldn’t have asked you that.” I crouched down while Eric walked around us to get in. “Let’s not wake up Yongjae, Yongkeey. Little guy’s asleep already” I whispered, smiling at her as I petted her.

Suddenly, Eric groaned loudly from the living room. I stood up and walked towards him. Then I witnessed why he was groaning so loudly. Rose petals, broken stems, and leaves were scattered everywhere in the living room. I glanced behind me and saw Yongkeey sitting by the doorstep, looking so innocent with her tongue out while staring at us like this wasn’t her doing.

“Oh no…” Eric groaned beside me.

“You prepared this?”

“I hid it in the nursery room… I had a whole bouquet of roses for you but th