Chaeyoung

 

After four tries, I finally casted my line out into the lake and set the rod down. I slumped on the chair and looked at my side. She was looking so focused. The tip of her fishing rod dipped sharply as line began peeling from her reel, "I'm getting a bite" She stood up and started reeling in a fish from her rod. Another trout like the previous one, but a little bigger. It had stopped struggling and was half floating, swimming slowly back and forth. She reeled the line in until she was able to net the fish and pull it on the shore.
 

"This is the most uninteresting and boring sport" I commented, watching her used a pair of pliers to remove the hook from the fish's mouth. She placed it inside the white bucket filled with water and took a picture, small smile on her face.
 

"Why all the angst against a sport that seems so relaxing and exciting?" She asked, putting her phone away.
 

I looked out over the lake, the water calm and still. Although it was boring as hell, the picturesque landscape made up for it. I took a sip of my beer and sighed, "All you have to do is just sit and wait. It's tiring and a waste of time"
 

"That's expected from you"
 

I heard she chuckled while baiting her hook with chicken meat. She dropped it into the water and propped up the rod. I leaned back into my seat and massaged my temple, "Don't beat around the bush. Now, tell me what you think"
 

"Mina" She spoke. I glanced at her, alerted. After Mina left early in the morning, I received a call from Dahyun. It was almost right on time. I agreed to join her in this ridiculous sport and told her what had happened, hoping she could provide a useful advice. Though, I hated to admit, her judgment was dependable. Besides, I needed a third point of view.
 

She turned to me, "Mina went out fishing without a bait. Patience is one thing, but that's fricking ridiculous. At one point, she knew you weren't coming but she kept waiting. To her, you are worth the wait but to you, she is unimportant, a waste of time. That's the kind of situation you put her through Chaeyoung. You neglected her, disrespected her, dissapointed her, again" she said, sounding entirely unasmused.
 

Last night was unexpected, "I had no choice"
 

"You did" She retorted, "That night, you could stay at Nayeon's place or fulfill your promise to Mina. Why did you choose the former and now burdened by the consequences? As far as I'm concerned, you are rebellious and crazy for control. But whenever, Nayeon is around, you changed to such an extent that I no longer recognized you. Is there something that I didn't know?" She shifted in her seat, looking at me intently. It was obvious she wanted to dive into this topic deeper. It was rare to see her in a state of total confusion and thrilled curiosity and this was one of it. Most of the time, she weighed the situation and found her own conclusions.
 

However, this was one of the topic I wished to avoid. I cast a look down at my hands crossed in my lap. A warm layer of red coated my hand, which now shook uncontrollably. The blood dripped slowly, making a small pool. I breathed in, shutting my eyes shut and opened them again to see my hands were perfectly fine. No stained of blood. I clapsed them together, "She's someone important to me"
 

I felt the intensity of her gaze deepened and ignored it. She arched her brow, asking nonchalantly, "More than Mina?"
 

"More than anyone" I retorted.
 

A frown crossed swiftly over her face and her eyes narrowed. She was going to push this matter further and she did, "What exactly happened between you two? Because clearly she is more than just a friend but she's not in romantic relationship with you either" She sat cruelly studying me, her eyes shrewd and calculating.
 

I swallowed, reluctantly deciding to answer the question, "If it weren't because of her, I'd be dead by now." That perks her interest. My response only served to pique her already growing curiosity. I took a deep breath, looking for an escape from her, but she had me cornered. Even if I managed to escape, she wouldn't stop peering into this issue.
 

"Nayeon is hurting, she's in pain. And I was the one who put her through that endless nightmare and misery. If it was indeed a choice, I made the right decision that night. If I had to choose again and again, my decision remained unchanged. I won't and I can't leave Nayeon. She needed me more." That was enough. Small bits and pieces, just enough to satisfy her curiosity without going into detail. I certainly owed her no explanations, nor would I tell her everything about my life. Perhaps, I would if it only involving me but it wasn't.
 

"This will be the last we'll going to talk about her. I hope you won't question anything related to Nayeon anymore" I reminded her with a tint of warning, which thankfully she accepted. It seemed that I'd given her enough information and she saw right through me.
 

Hyun nodded slowly and turned her attention back to her fishing rod, "That explains something then. So, if you made the right decision, what's bothering you now?"

 

"Who do you think you are? Do you really think you are my wife? Who are you to get into my business"

 

Those sentence echoed in my mind. The second those words escaped without thinking, for the briefest instant, a hint of pain appeared I'm Mina's eyes and it stunned me. Her outburst, her face that were a stone mask of hurt and belligerence, stunned me into silence. I should've stopped her but at that moment I had nothing to say to her. Everything made me suffocated.
 

A hand on my shoulder cut right through my train of thought and I looked at my side. Hyun wore a concerned expression and I brushed it off, smiling to reassure her, "I said some things to Mina. Things, I maybe shouldn't have said. I didn't know why it drove me mad to see her with my stepsister" I confessed.
 

She chuckled, tapping my shoulder. Suddenly, I felt a heavy pull on my line. My fishing rod was bending downward. I quickly picked up the rod and started to reel the fish in closer. I could see a flash of silver in the water as it tried to get away. I reeled in more with force, pulling the rod. The line snapped. I felt the tension give away. The fish was gone. Dammit. Hyun laughed and I scrunched up in dissapoinment.
 

"If you didn't force it, it won't get away. Patience, Chaeyoung. You can't even catch a fish, let a alone a human being with feelings." She took the rod from my hand and fixes it, "You shouldn't let anger eat you from the inside out and become the best version of yourself. Anger jeopardized every and any type of relationship. You should remain conscious that every word you say has the tendency to either bring the two of you closer or draw you apart. Talk and hugs, is thousands time better than argue and fights. It's draining and exasperating, not only to you but to her"
 

She handed the rod back with a new line and bait. She leaned back to her seat and stared straight into my eyes, "If you let your line to snap again, you might lose something more valuable than just a fish"
 

I remained still and listened, not quite understanding. I was still processing her previous comments when she continued, "You are fills with rage, Chaeyoung. I understand why and I bet you know too. Pain affect how we behave, to a degree. They are not excuses for being a total for the remainder of your life. You should confront your feelings rather than masked it. Also, communicate with Mina. Be more open to her and she might be able to understand you"
 

"I don't talk about my past"
 

"You don't have to. Just a brief explanation will do. If Mina really means something to you, then she deserves to know at least that much about you, don't you think?"
 

I had nothing smart to say to that. As much as I hated talking about myself, I needed Mina. I wanted her to return. Part of me knew she would, Ray was at home, she couldn't possibly leave just like that, I'm sure of it and maybe that was what I wanted to believe. That she would come back to me. Maybe, I really had to talk to her. Mina, she deserved that.
 

"Chaeyoung" Hyun called, I looked at her, "To manage anger wisely, you must listen closely to its origins in your heart and not say the first thing that comes in your mind. When it comes to dealing with rage, follow the biblical wisdom of simply slowing down. You will find, you have a variety underlying emotions behind this anger that you probably don't want to admit" She took my hand and placed it over my chest, "For example, in your situation; Jealousy"
 

"Jealousy? Why?"
 

"That's the question" She quirked up. The corner of her lips curled in a strange smile, "You'd better know the answer to that. The sooner, the better"
 

That smile surely made me uneasy. Now that she enlightened me about it. Since Mina got caught into my life, that woman thrown my entire existence into the heap of confusion and doubt. Never in my life had I been so unsure about myself. My mind was conflicted. I definitely knew that I wanted her with a physical force that frightened me. I knew that much, but was completely clueless what I would do if she was with me, if I had her, if she was mine. Why did I want her in the first place? That forced me to confront my real feelings, that I had been always avoiding.

"Mina makes me anxious" I blurted.

"Anxiety doesn't come from fear, it comes from unfamiliarity. You are experiencing something that you have never been. Get used to it, whatever feelings you have towards her. Don't run, don't avoid it. If not, you will put her and yourself in endless confusion and uncertainty. That's what hurts, Chaeyoung. Some things aren't clear now, and we need time and courage for it to be visible for us to see it. You don't have to understand now, you don't need an answer now. There will be a time where you need to face your real feelings and decide but it doesn't have to be now. So don't feel burdened by that feelings. Just let yourself feel it. What you need right at this moment is just to do what you want to do without questioning anything. Take the risk. That's what you are best at"
 

She was so good in words. In so many ways the conversations were always refreshing as well as eye-opening with her. She gave plenty and useful advise along with encouragement. She should be a consultant instead of a surgeon. I finished the beer and crushed the can; a habit and tossed it to the basket near me, "I'm going. Good luck with that" I stood up and brushed my hands off on my trousers. I turned to walk away, but she called me back.
 

"There's a difference between right decision and unregretful decision, Chaeyoung-ah. That night you made the right but regretful decision. That's why you are like this now. That's why you are suffering. This won't be the last. You will be at a crossroads again. And when that time comes, I hope you choose wisely"
 

I lowered my head slightly, and a strand of hair floated down to the side of my face. A cool wind fluttered off the water and brushed past me. I looked up at the dull sky growing darker, "Clouds are coming in. You don't want to get your clothes wet" I swung around, dismissing the truth in her words.
 

I spend the rest of my evening strolled around the shopping mall. It was attached to the Hirai Hotel with direct access. There was no particular reason which left me wondering why I was sent here. Mrs Eri ordered me to pay a visit to this hotel and I noticed that this place didn't have that much of a guest. It wasn't as packed as the Hirai's other hotels. I walked around the second floor of the mall when I spotted a table full of toys and games. A pretty snow globe on one of the tables caught my eye. It featured a winter scene with Christmas tree and a smiling penguin standing on snow. I smiled.
 

The bells attached to the door hinge jingled as the door moved. I walked inside, not looking at the people in the store and went straight to the tables. I reached out for the snow globe when a hand appeared and took it. Heck was that! I hissed and looked beside me. It was a tall woman. She wore an extravagant style of fashion; a floppy hat of many colors, pink fur shawl around her neck, small flashy purse, high-heel cowboy boots. She was a blondie and pale, only half of her was shown because of that big sunglasses and hat. There was a suitcase next to her. A foreigner perhaps.
 

I shook my head, and turned to the snow globe in her hands, "You'd better not touch it. I saw it first"
 

She sneered, looking down at me. A mocking smirk played across her lips, "I grabbed it first, shorty. What? Are you going to knee bump me or something?"
 

"Exactly," Without hesitation, I kicked her in the shin. Hard enough to make her crumpled to the floor. She cried and I quickly snatched the snow globe off her hand.
 

"That's mine" She whined, gritting her teeth and though she was wearing a black eyeglasses. I could feel her eyes sending dagger, "I'm going to sue you. My father will put you in jail"
 

A rich princess brat, "It's mine. I saw it first and go report it to you father. I'm not afraid" I stuck my tongue out, and walked towards the counter. The employees looked at me nervously and one approached her, telling her that there was a bunch of stock for that snow globe but that bratty princess refused and stomped her feet, leaving the store. What a child. I thought she was a foreigner but she spoke fluently. Hope I never encounter her again. She was a pain in the .
 

My journey continued with a small bag in my hand from my purchase. Another store caught my attention. It was a book shop. I rubbed my eyebrows and finally decided to enter. I searched for a particular book and spotted that same woman. She was standing at the stationery section. It was hard not to notice her because of that dazzling and spectacular appearance. I swung around, and hurriedly looking for the book. When I had found it, I immediately paid and left.
 

Thought that was the last time I saw her but I was proven wrong when she was sitting just two tables away from me while I was having my coffee inside the cafe. Again and again I kept meeting her and it seemed that she was unaware of my presence since she was too focused shopping around. I was baffled when she bought a whole dozen of socks and danced happily. She was indeed one weird woman. Ah, maybe she was special. Now I felt bad. I brushed it off.
 

Having a minor freak out over an uncontrollable urge to drive home and bury myself in her arms. I wanted to see Mina. The sun started to set, leaving a pink and purple skyline. I finished my world as soon as possible and left early. However, later that night, I was met with empty house. I was more disappointed than I had a right to be. Should I go to her apartment? 
 

For a second, I contemplated to search for her. But that smacked of eagerness to see her that I had no intention of admitting to. So instead, I flopped on the couch and scrolled through the never-ending inbox in my phone, desperate for something to take my mind off the resounding silence. There was nothing from the person I was waiting for. I sighed. Was it had always been this quiet? I was back to think where she might have been. I looked over my wrist watch, it was past seven. It had been more than ten hours.

I should find something else to do. Like....I glanced around the house, suddenly at loss. Prior to getting married, what had I done on a random Saturday when I was bored? Nothing. Because I rarely bored. Usually I had work and other stuff to occupy me. I dug out the book that I had bought and flipped through it. Never Get Angry Again by David Lieberman. Did this thing really help? I read few pages and learned a thing or two about managing sudden outburst of anger and how to respond properly to it. The clock ticking too loudly on the wall was fairly disturbing. I groaned and put down the book.
 

Raising to my feet, I did a bunch of jumping jacks and jogged around the house. I hated exercise but I needed to do something, anything. Every five minutes that felt like forever, I ran back to the couch and checked my phone, "No calls" I mumbled, staring at the screen. Another thirty push up. Lifted a dumbbell and settled it into my hand. I curled it up in my bicep and moved the weight up and down, working each arm for what seemed a very long time. I ran back to the living room, feeling every single drop of sweat rolling down my back, "She must have called by now," Nothing. There was none.
 

Well, I was in rush. Should've given it a little bit more time. I prepared the rope and swung it over my head and started skipping. Jumped. Jumped. Salty water trailed down my forehead and stung my eyes. My arms ached. I dropped to the couch and gasped for air. Lord. I hated exercise. I reached for my phone and glanced over the screen, "There's no...I've gotten..no calls" My body rolled to the floor and I laid there, sprawling. I stared blankly at the ceiling, ignoring the grumble on my stomach.
 

The bell rang. Finally. I sprang up to greet her, almost too excited than I would admit, totally not okay with how my pulse quickened at the prospect of seeing her and completely unsure how to stop it. I opened the door, "Kon'nichiwa, Chaeyoung-san" Momo grinned, waving her hands. My shoulder slumped and I squeezed out a smile.
 

"Ah, Momo, please get in" I stepped aside, letting her in, "What brings you here?"
 

"Mina didn't answer my calls. We supposed to hang out today. I was worried so I'm checking her up, is she okay?" She asked, looking around the house.
 

"Mina isn't here"
 

"Hmm? Where is she?" She tilted her head and when I couldn't answer her question her eyes narrowed, "Did you two fought?" She folded her arms across her chest. I opened and closed my mouth, thinking if it was a good idea to come clean, no words spoken. I had been lying to the Hirai, why couldn't I just made up some excuse for Mina's absence. Why did I feel nervous and anxious?
 

"Miss Momo" A voice called from behind. I snapped my head towards the front door. I felt like I was glued to the floor, my eyes locked on the woman that monopolized my mind for the whole day. She had changed her clothes. She walked inside and turned to Momo, "I'm sorry, something came up at my old neighborhood I couldn't come to the appointment. My phone died and I forgot to contact you."
 

She averted her gaze to me and pecked my cheek, "I'm sorry Love, I had to leave early in the morning without telling you. You were asleep and I didn't want to disturb---" Her last word hanging in mid-air as I pulled her into a tight embrace. Almost instinctively, I couldn't hold the urge to touch her the moment I saw her. It was fascinating and frightening how she had this much effect and influence over me, "Baby, we have a guest here, come on" She tried to break free and there was no way I would let her. I tightened my arms around her and closed my eyes in sheer joy and gratitude that she had come back to me.
 

Soon, I felt her hand reaching my waist and slipped under the hem of my shirt, her palms flattening on my sides then sliding around to my back. I dipped my face into the hollow of her neck, tugging her closer. She softly ran her fingers along my back in a soothing manner.
 

"She must be missing you a lot. I think this is my cue to leave" Momo chuckled. I couldn't care less about anything but the woman in my arms.
 

"No you don't have to, please stay a little longer" Mina replied, sounded a little distressed. I felt her body shifted but her hands remained rubbing on my back.
 

"And watch you being all lovey dovey? I have girlfriend too. I'll get going. Enjoy"
 

Footsteps grew further. Followed by the sound of the door thudded closed, Mina's hands dropped, "Let me go" She said, no, she demanded. Her voice cold and foreign. 
 

I pulled away, but kept my hands on her shoulders, "Where have you been? Have you forgotten the terms of our contract?"
 

"There's no clause saying that we always have to be together"
 

She was right, there was no such thing indeed. I pressed my lips together, out of words to say and rubbed my eyebrows. She put my hands down and tried to walk past me but I shot an arm out and barred her path, "Are you going to say something or not?" She snapped, annoyance laced in every word.
 

"I---I haven't had dinner. I'm hungry"
 

She stared at me silently, closed her eyes momentarily then started towards the kitchen. She wore the apron and I stepped behind her, taking the bow and tied it around her waist. She ignored me, walking around as she searched for the ingredients while I trailed her wherever she went. I thought she would have push me away or tell me not to disturb her, but she didn't. Worst, as if I wasn't here, as if I was invisible, she completely ignored me. While she was cutting the vegetables. I hugged her gently from behind.
 

"I'm holding a knife, Chaeyoung" She warned, pausing.
 

I smiled at her sweet attempt, "From now on, I'll call you if I'm going to be late. I'm not used to having someone wait for me. So I'm not used to calling or explaining why I'm going to be late. But from now on, I'm going to call and tell you everything. Explain to you if it's needed. You mean something to me, Mina. I was angry and when I'm angry, I said things I didn't mean"
 

"It's not an excuse"
 

"I know"
 

"I'm trying to adapt, Mina"
 

"Of what?"
 

"You"
 

"Pardon?"
 

"I'm trying to figure out"
 

"Figure out what?"
 

"You"

She sighed heavily, "Chaeyoung, I don't understand"
 

I also didn't understand a single thing Mina. I wished I am. She loosened my arms and swung around. Our eyes met and she gazed at me wordlessly, as if she was waiting. I looked away and rubbed my eyebrow, Hyun's advice rung in my head, "I was raised to fight hard in life. I mean, the Chairman was tough on us kids and expected us to make something of ourselves. I work hard and I play hard, and try to not sweat the small stuff" I spoke slowly and hoped my voice wouldn't crack under the pressure in my throat.
 

"Does that work?"

"I don't know......" I lowered my head, "I can't seem to keep from getting upset about things, even small things. I keep thinking, it's all the pressure I'm under, but now I'm thinking I need to get a better handle on this anger thing. For you and for myself"
 

I lifted my head and looked at her. Her eyes softened, a sudden look of understanding flashed across her face. She nodded and turned around, continued cutting the vegetables. I wrapped my arms back around her and she let me be. Once in a while she would pinch my hand and held it, or feed me some of the fresh veggies. I thought she was making a quick meals but it seemed that she had changed her minds after our conversation.
 

She ordered me to help her pulling apart the roasted chicken, cutting and shredding it into bite-sized pieces. A drizzle of olive oil in a hot pan would ensure the shallots and garlic burst with flavour, she told me. Once they began to turn translucent, she added the veggies. I stared in amazement. She certainly weren't making a Korean food. She then cooked the tender pasta noodles in boiling water. Everything went into a huge bowl and she mixed the ingredients with a jar of Alfredo sauce before filling a casserole dish and sprinkled grated cheese over the top. The casserole needed thirty minutes in a hot oven which she used to make another tossed salad. She was working so diligenty. I couldn't help but to smile, watching her.
 

"Lord, that smells good" I commented as she scooped a small portion onto my plate and added some salad. I took a mouthful of it and was shocked at how delicious it was.  Just how talented this woman was? She looked at me and I raised two thumbs up. She smiled. Her lips curled up softly. It was genuine, not a forced smile because of a guest. It was a sincere smile. It brought the same smile on my face. We ate in silence and we'd both passed glances. Whenever our eyes met accidently, we would exchanged small smile.
 

After dinner, I helped her with the dishes and remembered the thing I had bought from the shopping mall. I stopped her from going to the second floor. She stood at the foot of the stairs while I dashed towards living room and grabbed the bag. I handed it to her, "Here, a gift"
 

She hesitantly take it and looked inside,  "It's a snow globe. Did you buy it?"
 

I rubbed my eyebrow, "Uhh no it's from a friend"
 

She hummed and nodded slowly, "Please deliver my thank for her/him" She swirled around and ascended the stairs.
 

Ah, I forgot to tell her. Quickly chasing after her, I blocked her path, again, "Mina, if you click this button," I pointed to the black button under the globe, "The penguin will spin and there will be a light melody. It will last for five minutes. I thought that it might helps you to fall asleep"
 

A playful smile playing across her lips, "If I didn't know any better, I would assume this was from you."
 

I avoided her gaze. She let out a tiny suppressed laugh, a soft warm sound that sounded like small bells in my ears. She stalked closer and pecked my cheek, "Goodnight, Love. Thank you for the gift" She said with a grin.
 

I played along, smiling, "Goodnight, Sweetheart. You're welcome" That night, I was content. My chest felt light as a feather, feeling completely relieved. As I tucked myself to sleep, she was still in my mind. I looked at my hands and instantly felt the emptiness. I ached to put an arm around her and hug her. It would have been wonderful if only she was next to me, where I could touch her, kiss her all night. I closed my eyes, hugging the pillow to soothe the growing temptation and urged to barge inside her room.












 

*     *     *     *   

Mina

 

I woke up to an empty house. Chaeyoung had left a sticky note on the dining table. She informed me that she had an urgent meeting and left early in the morning. I'd made a simple breakfast for myself and was greeted by Hoon. He handed me a koala plushie and said it was from Jeongyeon as a wedding gift. I thanked him and went to the living room. Smiled and hugged the koala. How did Jeongyeon know I've always wanted this? I should thank her some other time.
 

I looked around and wondered how I am going to spend my time today. Since quitting from my previous job, I was basically unemployed, a housewife, one might call. I should pay Sana a visit. It had been quite some time. I missed talking to her. Her condition seemed to have gotten a lot better after the surgery. The doctor gave positive feedback and I had never been so grateful and blessed in my whole life. Sana was all I had. My phone suddenly rang and I looked over the screen, Jeongyeon? I slid the green button.
 

"Good morning, Mina, I'd like to see you if you have free time. I have things to say" She started. She wanted to meet up. I glanced to the clock on the wall. I could visit Sana later at the evening. Considering  the urgency in her voice, I couldn't refuse. Besides, I was bad at declining.
 

"Yes, of course" I answered.
 

"Can I see you around 11 a.m. at Royal Cafe?"
 

"Yes that's okay. I'll see you soon" The call ended and I sighed. I also had to thank her for the other day and apologize for what had happened. It was quite a scene. After the argument with Chaeyoung, I went to my apartment. My first instinct was to run to Sana but I knew I would break down the moment I saw her, hence I didn't.
 

I came back to this house after seeing tons of missed calls from the Hirai. The secrecy, guilt had slowly eaten me up on the inside. My mind was tangled and I sorted things out, deciding that I couldn't just run away like this. It was irresponsible. I knew at one point, that I would have to lie and carried the weight of guilt. But the Hirai had become a family to me. I wanted to tell them the truth but now wasn't the right time. I had to help Chaeyoung and once she got what she wanted, I would apologize for everything.

Chaeyoung took my by surprise last night. I had never expected that she would opened up about her past knowing how reluctant she was about it. Eventhough it was just a small information, it gave an insight into her personal life. I understood and accepted it. Her effort to make it right was...appreciated. It was warming.
 

However, I decided to not expect or hope anything from her. Every words and every gestures, I didn't want to think and assume anything. It was meaningless. She was a wind, brushing past me. All of this would lose its meaning. I shouldn't be emotionally invested at something that was momentarily. That was the only way to save myself from hurting. We were no more than work partner. No more than that, Mina.
 

Exactly at eleven sharp in the morning, I found myself sitting across Jeongyeon at Royal Cafe. She was punctual, we both shared that in common. We had lunch together after strolling around the nearby store and watched a movie. I picked a few spaghetti with the fork and used the resistance of the silver spoon, wrapped the spaghetti into a ball. Lowering my head, I fed the fork into my mouth. It was elastic and had a very good taste. The unique spicy taste of the black pepper mixed with peppermint fragrance proved it was cooked well, "It's really good" I exclaimed. Wondering if I could make the same for dinner. Chaeyoung would like it.
 

"Really?" Jeongyeon asked, smiling. I diverted my attention back to him and nodded, "That's a relief"
 

"Yes. It was worth the wait"

We continued eating and once in a while conversed in a topic where we both surprisingly interested in. She was a fun person to be with, "So how do people date these days?" She wiped her hands and looked at me as we finished.
 

"Sorry?" I frowned.

"We went to the movies, we had lunch, what else do they do?"

"Date....?" I blinked in confusion while she had a wide grin carved across her face. I thought she had something to tell me. Before I had the chance to ask her about it, she stood up and dragged me with her. She had taken me to a street food festival. I had never been there. It was obviously packed with crowds, I was almost lost, but Jeongyeon had her hand securely holding mine. We went from cart to cart. I was fascinated by the never-ending and unique food.
 

She handed me a heaping serving of  deep fried battered fish that she just bought. One that I never tasted before. It looked like French fries. The massive amount of food was wrapped around like a bouquet of flowers in paper. I picked up a chunk of the pipping hot fish and broke off a piece. Steams lifted from the flaky white fish inside. She did the same and put the whole piece in . I bit into the crispy deliciousness. The fish tasted light and mild with a satisfying crispy chewiness from the deep fried batter. Tangy, sweet, delicious. My mouth was still full, I looked at her with wide eyes. This was far between than I'd expected.
 

She laughed and nodded, "I know, great isn't it? I used to come here when I was little. It was cheap and delicious" She smiled broadly. I reciprocated the gesture. Though I was slightly alarmed. She spoke as if came from a poor family. I could never imagine Chaeyoung in this kind of place, but it seemed that Jeongyeon was comfortable. Weren't they siblings after all? I brushed off the thought. She caught my hand again and I smiled as we continued our food expedition.

There was also street performence and we stopped by listening to the singer. I turned to my side and realized she wasn't around. I panicked and was about to call her when I felt a small poke on my shoulder. I swung around and there she was, laughing. I  pouted and she pulled out a pink cotton candy from her back and handed it to me. I smiled and took it. We started walking again. I was eating my way through the cloud of sweet cotton candy, when she leaned and took a bite. I was shocked by her sudden closeness. Her arms were around me—I hadn't noticed that either. Heat rose up to my face but I remained still and unknowingly held my breath. Her eyes curled into a crescent moon-like shape. We stared at each other for a moment before she pulled away.
 

"It's sweet" She said, smiling. She opened and I chuckled, taking a piece and fed her. That was much better than she leaning in. After touring around and her gifted me with a bouquet of flower, we took a rest on a wooden bench where it was more quieter.
 

"Was it a boring date?" I asked, glancing at her.
 

"No, not at all. It was fun. Were you bored?"

"No, it was fun for me too. I love eating from the street vendors and walking around and looking at things. But I can't do these things with Chaeyoung. She doesn't like this. She will call me out for being so parsimonious," I took a deep breath and reminded by the plushie that I received this morning. I turned to her and smiled, "Anyway, thank you for the koala plushie. Hoon said it was from you. I never had a plushie before. It was really adorable but quite expensive. I always saved money to buy one but had to use it on different things instead. And at the end, never bought one for myself"

Her brows furrowed, "Chaeyoung never get you one?
 

"She did, of course she did" I quickly replied. That was close. I should've been more careful, "Anyway thank you for today"

"I'm happy that you are happy" She flashed a huge grin and I mirrored hers. We were back in silence and watched passerby walking around, "To be honest, I knew Chaeyoung didn't marry you because she loved you"
 

I snapped my head towards her, what did she meant by that? Did she know something? My hand fiddled nervously on my lap as I fumbled with words to say, "I think you've misunderstood----"

"You know the expression,‘What if’?" She interjected and turned to face me. Her eyes stared deeply into my eyes, "I hate those words more than anything. I don't think there's a need to look back and regret things that have already happened. But I've thought a lot about those words since meeting you. What if I had the first opportunity? What if I had put out more effort? What if I confessed my feelings earlier? What if you worked under me?  What if you hadn't married Chaeyoung? What if I had.....another chance? I told myself, I wouldn't lose that chance. Since your marriage is nothing but a contract, then it's not too late for me isn't it? Will you give me a chance?"

I flopped down on my bed. Chaeyoung texted me she was coming home late because of work. She even took a picture and send me her schedule. And even Ms Sakura called me to let me know. She was going overboard. I shook my head, washed up and dressed for bed in a pair of peach silk pajamas. It was going to be hard to fall asleep without her wheezing. I pulled the duvet over my lap and looked at the two items on the bedside table. I took it and put it across me.
 

I stared at the penguin snow globe; "You mean something to me" I gave it a shake. Colored pieces of fake snow swirled all around the miniature world. It was beautiful. Pressing the black button, soft light melody played.

My eyes shifted to the koala plushie; "Will you give me a chance?" I hugged the plushie and rubbed his soft head.
 

I placed both of it to the bedside table. I turned around, my back against them. I played a thunder and rain background on my phone to help me to sleep. It took a while, but eventually I fell asleep. I didn't need a melody from a snow globe nor a plushie to snuggle at night.















 

  - to be continued-
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✒ JunKudo
 

A/N: 1) I scanned through my outline and we currently covered 10% of the plot. There's more events and scene we haven't go thought yet. This book might be longer than expected. It seems that I have to cut some scene too.