We all sat around the T.V. to watch a movie after the lovely dinner Jin cooked for us. While the guys continue arguing on what to watch, I cuddle into Hoseok's arms and let my mind travel in a completely different place, falling asleep; when I woke up, it was really getting late. I look around the room; everyone's full attention was still on the movie playing. 

"Are you okay?" 

"What?" I mutter, my mind came back to reality. Hoseok was looking at me with a concerned expression. "Yeah— I'm fine. Just a little tired."

"Come on, I'll take you home," his voice was soft. 

"Do you think that's a good idea? We're not supposed to be seen together..."

"It's past 2:00 a.m." he pointed out. "A pretty lady like yourself shouldn't be wandering the streets at this time of night." He stood up and grabs my hand, "We'll be fine." Hoseok gave me his signature sunshine of a smile; my heart melted away. 

I said goodbye to BTS— catching a reminding glimpse from RM— and we walk back to my dorm, hand in hand, but in silence.

When we reached my school, we stop at the park on the outskirts of the building. "Alright, what's wrong?" he turned towards me, folding his arms. "You've been quiet all night."

I tense up, I didn't think he noticed that. I mean, I'm always quiet.

"I'm fine, really," I lightly smile. Hoseok raised an eyebrow and shook his head, laughing humorlessly, "You can't lie, so stop trying. Now spill."

I tried to speak, but my voice was stuck in my throat. Hoseok's stare was intense, but his eyes remained soft eyes as they wait for a response. 

"Hey," he whispered in a gentle tone and grabbed my hand, "whatever it is, you know you can tell me."

I took a deep, shaky breath and nervously roll my lips in, gathering up all my courage. "I'm leaving."

He tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

"The program is almost over, and my visa is about to expire."

There was a long pause between us. "W-when?"

I swallowed the large lump in my throat. "By the end of the month," I mumble. His eyes grew wide. "The end of this month?"

I nod. "I told you, I'm only here for the summer," my voice was quiet.

"And you're just now telling me this?" Hoseok let go of my hand, and backed away running a hand through his hair, "But that only gives us— what, two, three weeks?"

It was quiet for a few minutes as he tried to wrap his head on what was going on. He frustratedly ran his hand through his hair again. I could feel his glare; it was like his eyes were burning through my skull. I felt so small. "How long were you planning to wait on telling me?" He asked, firmly. "Till the day before you left?"

"No, of— of course not." I finally look up, regretting it immediately. His eyes were so sad. "I didn't know what to say. I don't know— I just..didn't know how. I was scared—"

"Scared of what?" Hoseok's face suddenly grew hard, "Is that what you and Namjoon were talking about earlier?" I look down biting my bottom lip. "Do you trust him more than you trust me?" 

"What? No—"

"Then why didn't you come to me?" he demanded. "You know, I would have understood. I mean, you're my best friend." He let out a frustrated sigh. "Damnit! You can't just drop something on me like that. I could have prepared myself or something. It would have been a hell lot easier."

"Hobi, I-I'm sorry," my voice starts to crack, "I didn't know how to tell you—"

"But you could tell Namjoon." His voice began to rise. I've never seen him like this. "And then you were gone for two months! We could have spent time together— do something. Why would you just disappear like that?" That last comment really pissed me off. 

"Me?" 

"Do you know how many times I've texted you, called you, but didn't get a reply? Or how long I would sit around waiting for a simple message because you, or one of the guys, told me to 'expect one'?" I was now in his face looking him straight in the eyes. "If anyone, you were the one who disappeared and left me in the dark. You weren't even the one who invited me tonight."

Hoseok's gaze remained sharp, but I could see his eyes soften. "I've been busy lately, okay? But you know how crazy things get when a comeback is about to release— why should I even have to apologize?" he spoke sternly. "I never get to see you and now that you're here— now that we're finally together— you still distance yourself. Why are you acting like this?"

My hands ball into fists. "Because I was told to stay away!"

"What?"

"Oh, by whom you may ask?" I remonstrate. "By your boss, your manager, the whole world!" 

"After the trip there were pictures all over the place— in case you didn't notice— and I didn't want to cause a scandal or bad publicity for you and the group, okay?" Tears sting the corner of eyes. "I thought I was helping in some way— keeping my distance— hoping those stupid rumors would go away, but that's just me, and I don't exactly understand this entertainment business crap. So. My. Bad."

Hoseok stared at me completely speechless. It became silent between us, finally, he broke the barrier letting out another sigh. He held his face in the palm of his hands and ran his fingers through his hair. "Things were so much easier before all of this," he muttered under his breath. 

Before. As in before the trip— before we became a couple. I gape as tears fell down my cheeks; I can't believe what I just heard. 

"You're right, it was easier before." I mumble. "My apologies for caring so much about BTS. For caring about you— that I fell in love with you." I had to pause myself, for my voice almost cracked; I fold my lips in. Hoseok watched me with hard eyes. "But you're still my best friend and causing trouble for you is the last thing I ever want." I let out the breath I've been holding during this whole argument, still trying to hold back as many tears as I could. "And if this is the best way, then that's how it should be."

Hoseok shook his head. "Wait. That came out wrong. I didn't mean it like that."

The expression on his face went from confusion to pure shock after realizing what was happening; what I was implying. And before he could say anything else. "I'll miss you...J-hope."