A/n: Yugyeom and Jaebum talks it out and y times ensues :)

omg this was short but it was fun to write hahahah, kinda rated stuff ahead, after an emo talk of course, there isn't much but i'd like to think it was hot xD told you there'd one more chap to come :)

“So… Yug… I am sorry” Jaebum started as they laid on his comfy couch, Sherlock series running in the background. Jaebum knew they both were tired so he made sure they ate something and freshen up at least, despite the continuous whining from Yugyeom’s side. He also messaged Jooheon to apologize for his boyfriend’s behavior. Hopefully, Jooheon will remain a good guy and not fire him. Not that he will tell Yugyeom if that happens. After they finished their dinner, dawned in fresh clothes (yes, Jaebum stole Yug’s tee), Yugyeom put on Sherlock on Netflix. It was their tradition whenever Yugyeom slept over- which was way often for someone who didn’t live here. Not that Jaebum minds. It does create a very soothing atmosphere.

“Why?” Yugyeom tilted his head in confusion, his eyes showing definite trust that Jaebum could do no wrong. Jaebum never understood how could Yugyeom think that when he knows Jaebum all his life and know how much he screws up.

“Jinyoung told me to talk to you about it but I didn’t. I didn’t want to. I felt too self-conscious I guess, hated the thought of being weak… or ‘not being the one you looked up to’, I still- and will always care about your opinion about me, how you think about me, how I look in front of your eyes- and I- as stupid as it sounds- only wanted you to know good things about me. Which is not possible if we are lovers. I didn’t want to discuss how insecure I still feel about our age- it is not too much of a gap, but it still worries me. And, frankly, the reason is selfish- I was scared- scared that… you-” Jaebum stopped, taking a deep breathe- Yugyeom didn’t interfere, knowing Jaebum cared about his ego, and for him to admit mistakes (or his weakness) was pretty hard. “You are gonna go into a good university, you are amazing, Yugyeom and I am so proud of you- and I know other people will realize that too… and when they do, I was just- afraid… that you might make new friends and find someone better than me, I know how crazy college life can get- I just came out of it. You have recently turned legal, it's your time to live without commitments and complicated issues- and I will have jobs to do- gonna become those lame adults who do nothing but eat, work and sleep. I know, I know I am thinking too far ahead- but at some days, I cannot help it- my mind makes its own scenarios, and I- I give in to these pool of thoughts, and then… end up doubting myself- if I can give you what you need” Jaebum exhaled, biting his lips as he finally let his eyes fall on Yugyeom who was looking straight at him with no expression.

“We are idiots,” Yugyeom said at the end. Jaebum chuckled at that, nodding. “As you know, you aren’t the only one hyung, I get crazily scared too, about our future. I get scared you will get sick of this childish me, I am terrified when I think you will find someone mature, someone far settled- an adult- and leave me, or that one day you will wake up and realize finally that you don’t want me, that you are far better without me. I am naïve, I don’t know what I am gonna do in the future, or my career, and you already are living your passion- and I am afraid if I don’t hurry and catch up with you, I might lose you. I still don’t know how to manage my expense- you always make sure to help me, I don’t know how to shop for groceries without you by my side, I only know which cafes serve the best coffee, which hotel has the best ramen so I can take you on a good date- I know nothing except that I love you, and I fear it won’t be enough one day.”

“Yug, love, I-” Jaebum sniffled “No” he denied vehemently “You are more than enough for me, have always been- always- I love you, I have known you for so long, and I am so proud of the person you’re becoming, I can never ask for more, Yug. I didn’t know you-”

“Neither did I, but we both have our worries, and we will always have them. It’s natural. But as long as the fact that we love each other doesn’t change, I’d like to hope we can pull through”

“Of course! I- yes, Yugyeommie. I would love nothing more than that” Yugyeom smiled at his reply, pulling him closer so that he could kiss the man stupid. Jaebum never denies him anything, opening up sweetly for him, and Yugyeom takes all he is given. And more.

“Now… that bastard” Yugyeom spoke as he pulled away, Jaebum was still in a daze, Yugyeom’s kisses never failed to get him weak and fuzzy, he blinked, trying to decipher what the younger man was saying “why the did he kiss you?” the roughened voice startled Jaebum wide awake, staring at Yugyeom in wonder- how could he make such sounds!? He shook off the inappropriate thoughts in favor of giving Yugyeom the answer.

“To be honest… I donno why- I guess he was interested in dating me- while I never told him about us, he was kinda