Hi Diary.

This is gonna be short. Mainly because I’m still at the restaurant and I don’t wanna get caught with you.

I know it’s mean but… It’d be embarrassing for me to be seen with you. Sorry.

I love you though.

Anyway. After the awfully confusing day I had last time, I’ve just had the most stressful day ever.

That’s right. I’ve experienced one of men’s greatest fears. I met Alice’s mother. The only thing that’s worse than meeting the mother is meeting the father.

Basically, the restaurant was surprisingly almost empty and I was at the back with Peatry since there wasn’t really any work I could do, and then my mom came in, all hysterical and overly loud to tell me that my friend’s mom was here.

I looked at my mother and wondered for the first time if maybe she’d reached that age when you slowly go crazy.

Seeing that I wasn’t reacting at all, she pulled me up and forced me to the kitchen and then out, to the tables.

I look around and, sitting at a far table, I see Thiteya facing me, Alice back facing me and a woman beside Alice.

And in a millisecond, I understand. The woman is Alice’s mother. Holy . My Baby’s mother is in the restaurant. I’m gonna have to talk to her.

So, I know there’s nothing official between Alice and me, as a matter of fact she doesn’t even know we’re dating in my head, but I felt like I was meeting my girlfriend’s mom for the first time.

However, when you meet your girlfriend’s mom, you can at least dress up for the occasion, ask your girlfriend what her mom likes, what to talk about and more importantly, your girlfriend is there with you, supporting you and making sure the conversation and everything goes well.

But nope. I’m here, working. I obviously can’t change my clothes, I have no idea what to talk about with Alice’s mother and Alice has no idea I have a these feelings for her and I have no guarantee that she’ll help me out if I screw up.

And during the millisecond it takes to understand all this, I hide back in the kitchen. I was gonna ask ChaCha to go and do the tables while I’d clean the dishes.

Look, ChaCha hates doing the dishes. And I hate it too, but I’d hate even more to look stupid in front of Alice’s mom. So it’s a fair deal, no?

Of course it is. But my mom doesn’t see it that way. And just before I can ask ChaCha, she tells me this:

“Park Jaebeom, if you don’t go out and talk to them right now, I’m dragging you over to their table and I stay until you talk to them.”

Now, you see, the thing about my mom is that when she threatens to do something, she’s serious. You have to believe her, word for word. Like that time when I was a kid. I was making a scene at the grocery store ‘cause I wanted candy but my mom wouldn’t buy any. It was gonna be Halloween soon and she said I’d have all the candy I wanted then. She said if I didn’t stop, she’d take all of my candy for herself.

I didn’t stop and she did it.

She took all my candy.

I learned the hard way, as you can see.

So I walked out of the kitchen and prepared my speech. It’s easy. “Hi, are you ready to order?”

The simplest thing. I’ve said it at least a thousand times man. No stress, right?

I thought the same. But somehow, when I was halfway, my legs suddenly felt incredibly weak and I started shaking a little.

Luckily, I made it to the table safely and I asked if they were ready to order without stuttering/forgetting my words.

Alice’s mom said she’d take number 12, and Thiteya placed the rest of the order. Without letting Alice say what she wanted herself.

I know, I know. Alice hates ordering ‘cause she always thinks she’s gonna screw the names up and she finds it cheap to say only the number.

But Alice is adorable.

And I like hating on Thiteya. It’s entertaining.

I went back to the kitchen and almost collapsed from the relief. Almost. Didn’t have the time for collapsing. My lovely mother shoved glasses of water in front of my face and told me to bring them to Alice’s table. When I came back, their food was ready to be taken to them.

After I brought the food, I finally had some time to relax and think.

Alice’s mom is pretty.

Well, for a mom, she’s pretty. She has short hair and Alice has her eyes. But Alice’s are paler. Her mom’s hair is straight, well I guess it is… It’s short though. Maybe it curls when it’s longer… And her mom has really pale skin compared to Alice.

My Baby has a natural slight tan. Her mom is your typical white woman. Pale and white.

I wonder what Alice’s father looks like… He should have a darker skin and curly hair. And he should have pale brown eyes…

Maybe he’s like a pretty boy. But older.

Oh man. I hope he is.

I don’t want him to be all Mr. Muscle and tattooed and badass with a beard.

Yeah Jay. Go ahead. Scare your own self and your pants at the thought of Alice having a badass biker for a father.

Anyway. As I was saying, I finally had a moment of calm. Or so I thought. I was happily taking the order of a table near my Baby’s and I was about to go back to the kitchen when I hear Thiteya’s voice.

Now, let me say that I was trying hard to act like the perfect waiter. Polite, professional and able to answer every question.

But here’s what she said, while smirking and expecting me to fail epicly.

“Yo Jay, can you bring me the hot sauce?”

It took everything I had to keep the perfect waiter act and not tell her to go get it herself. Somehow I can keep the act and tell her I’ll bring it right away.

Twenty minutes after I brought the hot sauce, I come to take away their dishes and I come back five minutes later with tea.

Alice sees me, smiles and thanks me for the tea, Thiteya thanks me right after and Alice’s mom just looks at me while I pour the tea in the cups. And then she goes all “Ohhhh” when she sees the color of the tea.

It’s pink.

I proceed to explaining that it’s pomegranate tea, therefore pink and it’s sweet, unlike the fruit which can be bitter.

She nodded and tried it the moment I gave her the cup.

Guess what? She loved it. And even though I stuttered a little when I was explaining and it embarrassed and stressed me to no end, I ing did it. I got Alice’s mom to smile at me and I got to talk to her a little.

Success number one.

I walked away and headed for the kitchen, but I heard Alice’s mom ask who ordered the tea.

And Alice said that we were friends, so I gave them stuff sometimes.

And I actually stopped walking in the middle of the restaurant and smiled all happy and stupid looking.

She said we were friends.

Success number two.

Around half an hour later, they got up to pay. Well, Alice’s mom was paying.

Thiteya and Alice were just looking around and talking.

And the following thing happened.

I have to say this first.

“Dijon” is like a mustard brand, okay? The sticker writes “Moutarde de Dijon” and, well, it’s mustard.

So, we have those liquor syrups on a shelf behind the counter. Thiteya looks over there and here’s what happens.

Thiteya: Alice look! They have mustard behind the counter.

Alice looks but doesn’t find any.

Alice: What? Where?

Thiteya: Look. Dijon.

At this point, I’m wondering why the hell we have mustard with the liquor syrups. Until Alice laughs.

Alice: Are you serious? Mustard? Dijon is a city in France. La ville de Dijon. When we say Moutarde de Dijon, it just means the mustard comes from that city. Their brand name is the name of their city.

So, I know we’re talking about mustard, and it’s probably really normal and uny, but Jesus ing Christ. She sounds so y when she speaks French.

Alice shook her head and I looked at her, pretending I didn’t hear what they said and didn’t also think Dijon was exclusively mustard.

And she laughed and told me Thiteya was an idiot.

And we both laughed at Thiteya.

Success number three.

I’ll let you go now. Gotta go back to work.

And play with Peatry.

Adios~