"Only the Start"

"Am I really a Park?"

As soon as Jinyoung had let these words slip from his lips, he felt another struck of pain this time much worse than the already existing one. And it's like he dropped a bomb just by asking that question. He could see how his mom was frozen, still seated beside him but seemingly unable to say even a word, or move even an inch. was agape, eyes wide, and it shows how she's greatly taken aback by his question.

Jinyoung continued to stare at his mom despite of the tears slowly escaping his eyes. He was about to beg for his mom to talk when she finally did, after composing herself. "Jinyoung..." she says softly. "Son... why did you even think of asking that?"

Although he could see how his mom tries to act calm, he could also hear how her voice started to waver, unlike how she initially sounded when she first walked inside his room just a few minutes ago. From the side of his eyes, he saw how his mom tried to reach for his hand but Jinyoung restrained. "Because I want to know the truth." 

"What truth do you want to know?"

"The truth which you chose to keep from me, mom." 

His words brought another sense of fear which reflected on his mom's eyes. "Son-" How his mom starts to tear up while trying to grasp for words to say to him, only made Jinyoung hurt some more. The pain is piercing right through his heart. His mom reached for his hand yet again and Jinyoung was far too weak now to restrain for the second time. "It's not-"

"Will you tell me it's not true?" He asks, voice breaking. "Will you tell me that everything I heard and learned today were not true? Will you tell me that I am still part of this family? That I am still a Park, not by name alone but by blood? Mom, will you tell me that none of this is true and I am still my father's son?!"

"Jinyoung please hush it down. Please-"

"Mom, I don't know what to believe in anymore." Jinyoung cries as his heart continues to hurt with every word he's saying. "I want to know the truth but I'm afraid of what it'll cause me... I'm afraid I couldn't even handle it. Mom... why'd you have to be this cruel to me? Why, mom? Why?"

He then felt his mom tugging on his hand, pulling him to her arms and with his lack of strength, Jinyoung could only cave in. "Please let this all be a lie. Mom, please tell me that it's all a lie. Please..."

And as he cried, his mom could only cry too as she pats his back gently, in the hopes of soothing the pain he's feeling. But when he heard her saying sorry, Jinyoung felt even more lost, and hopeless. With the last of his remaining strength, Jinyoung pushed his way past his mom, outside his room, downstairs, outside their house and their gate.

When he reached the street, Jinyoung ran without stopping as his tears continued to stream down his face.

"Did something happen to your dad?" Jinyoung asked when Seokjin parked the car right outside the hospital's entrance. 

The last time he'd been here was that one time the older brought him here along with Jungkook when Jeon In-Jung was rushed to the hospital as told by his secretary- Hani. Jinyoung could still remember how the siblings were when they found their dad in the ICU. And how Seokjin showed his vulnerability to him when he told him about his dad's current state. 

Jinyoung waited for the older's response as he watch him take his seatbelt off. But none came. Seokjin only glanced at him and gestured for them to get off the car. All Jinyoung did was follow Seokjin as the older walked along the hospital's corridors, and as they walked inside the elevator to take them to the floor where Jeon In-Jung was. 

When they reached the elder's room, Seokjin was greeted by a nurse. "He's still against it sir. Dr. Yoo had visited him half an hour ago but he's still not agreeing to it." Jinyoung sees the look of sympathy that the nurse has as she tell this to Seokjin who only responds with a nod. She asked yet again, "Should I call in Dr. Yoo?"

"There's no need. I'll ask for him once I change my dad's mind." 

The nurse bowed at the older, and upon seeing him bows to him as well before turning to leave. From the glass on the door, both of them could see Jeon In-Jung lying on the bed with his back facing them. Only then did Seokjin turned to him and nodded his head towards the door, as if telling him that he should follow the older inside. Although he has questions as to why he is needed in what seems to be a serious family matter, Jinyoung had no choice but to follow suit.

Seokjin was standing in front of him, a couple of steps closer to his dad's bed. "Dad..." the older calls on him. He saw how Jeon In-Jung slightly turned to see the older's face. Before Seokjin could even say more, Jeon In-Jung was talking already.

"I don't want us to argue about this. I already told you, this will only be a waste of time. Treatments won't do me any good. Let's just stop right here, Seokjin."

How the elder said that seemed to have prick something in his chest for an unknown reason. Putting all that he has heard from the nurse, from Seokjin and now from Jeon In-Jung, Jinyoung starts to get an idea on what this conversation is about. He saw how Seokjin clenched his fists and Jinyoung starts to feel heavier by the passing second. Why is he even here? Why did Seokjin even think of bringing him here?

"But dad-"

"I don't want you to think too much about this. We both know what's about to happen and it shouldn't be a problem. I accept my fate. You should just focus on managing the company, our company, and taking care of your younger brother. I'm not taking any more treatments. It'll only give me false hope."

"But I am willing to hold onto those false hopes, dad." Seokjin says and right at the end, Jinyoung might have heard his voice as it broke. "I still want to fight, and how I wish you'd choose to do the same."

Jinyoung stands there, motionless and wordless. He still isn't used to see Seokjin in this vulnerable state. But then again, if he was in the older's shoes, he's sure he won't be of any difference. He then saw although he's a few steps further, how Jeon In-Jung looked at his son with apologetic eyes. "Seokjin-"

"If I can't change your mind about this... and if I or Jungkook weren't enough to be your reason to fight, then I am sorry... but this is my last resort." At that moment, Seokjin turned to him as the latter took a step backward, moving aside to let him be seen by the the elder. "If I can't make you fight through this, then maybe your own son can."

It was enough to make Jinyoung's mind cease from functioning. He's completely lost. He had heard what Seokjin said, but his mind can't process anything. Even when Jeon In-Jung had his mouth agape, staring at him through wide eyes, and as the elder asked Seokjin what he's done and why he's done it. "This shouldn't be happening." The elder said but Seokjin continues to say sorry telling him that it's about time he finds out the truth.

Up until the ride back to their house, Jinyoung can't put his mind back to functioning properly. It was all too much for him. Everything he has learned from Jeon In-Jung himself... from his own father. It's what was retained in his mind after everything. When Seokjin left him inside the room with Jeon In-Jung, at first the elder wasn't sure how to tell him everything. But when he trailed off with that word... "Son..." Jinyoung was already about to break down. Yet he managed to keep his self conscious while Jeon In-Jung was telling him everything. How him and his mom has met, and how he loved his mom even before she got married to the father he knew- Park Hyungmin.

In-Jung told him that the Parks weren't welcoming of his mom from the very start of her relationship with Hyungmin, because of the fact that she is not in the same level as they are. She's nothing but ordinary. Yet, she loves his dad so much although Hyungmin also didn't have the backbone to fight for her against his family. And since In-Jung loved his mom, he looked after her and was always there whenever she needs a shoulder to cry on and arms to run into. And that said night happened, the night which his mom thought of as a mistake, but the very same night which In-Jung thought of as the best of his. A few weeks after they found out that his mom was pregnant. Although In-Jung would very much like to take responsibility, Na-Young refused and said Hyungmin will take responsibility and treat the child as his own. Thus, Jinyoung was given the name one with the Parks. Since then, never did Na-Young let In-Jung come near them. Hyungmin was no different. And over the past few years of trying, In-Jung finally gave up and let them have him. In-Jung also tells him that Seokjin and Jungkook were not his real sons. They were sons of one of his helpers who died of sickness. Since the helper was one of those who served him and his family the longest, In-Jung decided to take the siblings under his care and give him his name. The reason why In-Jung also put Seokjin in the position as his replacement, it's because In-Jung had no intention of taking Jinyoung back, or away from the family he's grown up with.

It was a lot for Jinyoung to take in. That even when Seokjin was talking to him as they reached their house, Jinyoung was still quiet. 

"Dad is refusing to take any more of his treatments. He wants nothing but to succumb to his sickness and I don't want that." Seokjin tries to hold gazes with him and he could see how a mixture of fear and sadness reflected in those eyes as he spoke. "I know this is all too much for you and as much as I would like to keep my promise to him, of keeping the truth from you... Jinyoung..." The older then reached for his hands. "You're my last hope. You're my last hope to will him to still fight. So please... please help me change his mind. Help us, Jinyoung. Please... help dad."

Jinyoung was still in deep thought that he wasn't able to hear the sound of the cars approaching. He's here in the hillside. How he'd hope that seeing the vast cityscape in nighttime would help him clear his thoughts. yet, his mind is still a complete mess. His cheeks were covered with dried tears. He had finished crying a long while ago and although his heart is still hurting, his eyes probably gave up on crying some more. Crying doesn't seem to lessen the pain.

"Jinyoung..." 

When he turned, he saw Jackson who had just got off of his car and is now walking slowly to where he was. Behind the Chinese, Yugyeom also arrived and he has Youngjae with him. His cousins are here but it didn't make him feel any lighter. Instead, he feels another lump in his throat and he's close to crying again. 

He had texted Jackson a while ago upon reaching the hillside. He feels so lost and he doesn't know what to do. He hoped that seeing his cousin would somehow help him get through this but he didn't expect Yugyeom and Youngjae would go here too.

"I felt like needing to tell them too." Jackson says as he walks towards him. "What are you doing here? What happened?"

Jackson sat beside him and Yugyeom and Youngjae were about to do the same when another car arrived. And Jinyoung recognizes who it was. "." Jackson's curse only tells him what he's thinking is right and soon enough, Jinyoung sees Mark stepping outside of his own car. 

Before he could even say anything, Jackson was fast enough to leave his side just to get where Mark was and block him from getting closer. "What are you doing here? I told you not to come."

"You can't expect me not to, Jackson." Mark's eyes were directed at him, glued and refusing to avert his gaze from him. "You texted in the group chat. If you didn't want me to come here, you shouldn't have sent the message there."

"It was a mistake. I didn't mean to-"

"And he only goes here when things are too much for him." Mark says, still staring at him with eyes which only makes him want to cry. Jinyoung tries hard not to, at least not yet. 

Jackson stayed in his place, still blocking Mark. "This should not concern you."

"And why not?" Mark bites back, focusing on Jackson for a short second before returning his gaze on him again. "I'm still his family, too."

Hearing that, made Jinyoung taste that same bitter taste again. It made him avert his eyes from the older, not being able to contain the pain which only surged more with the mention of that word... family. Are they still what he can call family? Is he still part of that? Jinyoung blinks his tears away as he darts his eyes on the starless skies. Heaving a huge sigh... Jinyoung calls on his cousin.

"Seun...?" 

From the side of his eyes, he saw how his cousin turned his head to look at at him when he called. Jinyoung heaved another deep breath before he went on. "Do you remember that night during our Christmas break when we went to this ski resort in Gangwon-do?" Jinyoung exhaled. "That night